Chapter 30

December 1870 – Colorado Springs

"Why didn't they come home last night," Brian asked, as he helped his mother and sister clear the table. Charlotte's eyes were fixed on the mantle clock. They had been gone

"I'm sure they had good reason."

"Ya think Johnny's ok though, right?"

"I'm sure he's just fine, Brian," Charlotte answered uncertainly. "I'm sure that Dr. Mike and Sully found him and'll be bringin' him home real soon."

"Ya think they're still with the Indians."

"I don't know, Brian. Maybe they're on their way home now, but they could've stayed 'cause of the snow. I don't think nobody wants to get out in this weather." Colleen cleared her throat.

"Brian, since we got our homework done, why don't ya help me with the chores? Before ya know it, Johnny'll be back in town, and you'll have your chores done, so ya can go play outside with him." Charlotte smiled gratefully at her daughter.

"But…"

"C'mon, Brian. Let's go." Colleen practically dragged her brother from the room, and Charlotte leaned against the wall, staring out the window. She felt her heart beginning to pound again, and she took a deep breath, hoping it would stop on its own, but when a few moments passed and her chest started hurting, she rushed to the little pack of Digitalis. She knew something serious was happening, and she was afraid of what that meant for her…for her family…for her home.

A knock came to the door, and Charlotte placed her hand over her heart, swallowing down the powder with a cup of water.

"Widow Cooper?" It was Horace.

"Come in, Horace," Charlotte called quickly, placing the cup down in the washbasin. When Horace entered the room, he had an envelope in his hands.

"Afternoon, Charlotte," he said with a nod.

"Afternoon," she replied. "What ya got there?"

"This just came on the train for ya. It's marked urgent…straight from Denver." Charlotte furrowed her brow.

"Thanks for bringin' it," she responded, taking the letter. He tipped his hat.

"Sure thing. I best be getting back."

"Have a good day, Horace."

"You too, Ma'am." He left quickly, and Charlotte fumbled with the envelope to get it open. When she pulled out the paper inside, she put her hand over her mouth and shook her head. She'd been afraid this would happen, but why did it have to happen now?

December 1870 – Cheyenne Reservation

When Michaela woke, it was early evening, and the smell of cooked meat filled her nostrils. She opened her eyes to see Johnny sitting up and eating hungrily off of a wooden plate. Without a word, Michaela sat up and checked on Sully. His color was better, and his bandage hadn't been soaked through with blood.

"Cloud Dancin' brought this," Johnny said quietly, holding out a fresh plate. "Says it'll keep our strength up." Michaela didn't have much of an appetite, but her stomach spoke louder than usual. She gratefully accepted the plate, not questioning what she was eating and began to fill her stomach. "He moved." Michaela glanced at Sully.

"He did?"

"Just for a second, but he moved his arm. I think he's gonna wake up soon." Michaela quickly set her plate aside and moved to check Sully's eyes. She smiled happily.

"I think you're right, Johnny." Johnny smiled proudly and went back to his food, too hungry to deny himself a full belly.

"Did they find him yet?"

"Find who?"

"The man that shot Pa." Michaela shuddered and put her plate down again.

"It…it was an accident, Johnny." It didn't even sound possible coming from her own mouth. She didn't expect a ten-year-old to buy it either.

"Is that what you think?" Michaela wasn't sure what she thought at that moment. She felt completely useless. All she could do was wait and see what happened. With frustration, Johnny shook his head. "Even if it was an accident, somebody pulled the trigger." Johnny frowned and looked away. "I ain't hungry no more." Michaela looked at his half-eaten food.

"You should try to eat a little more."

"I can't." He stood up and pulled his coat on. "I'm gonna go talk to Cloud Dancin' and Snow Bird." Michaela nodded in understanding and watched him leave. She understood that she was still quite a stranger to him, but she hoped he would open up to her soon. She wanted and needed his trust.

With an exhausted sigh, she lay down next to Sully again.

"Sully," she whispered, gently stroking his back. She pulled a blanket over the both of them to make sure he was warm enough. She frowned. She had thought he would have woken long before now. But, he had lost a considerable amount of blood. If too much more had been lost, she might not have been able to save him. But, he was doing better now. He just wasn't waking up.

She sat up again, shivering in the cold. She couldn't take the silence. The minutes were dragging by too slowly. She wanted to see his eyes. She wanted to hear his voice again. Until then, her world was shattered, and she was trying to pick up the pieces and trying to find a way to make things better.

She lay back down, facing the top of the teepee. She closed her eyes and tried to suppress the tears her body was eager to shed. She had to stay strong. She couldn't break. Sully needed her to stay strong, but how was she supposed to do that? Someone had shot at them. Someone had nearly killed her fiancée and could have killed her too. One centimeter to the right, and it would have gone through him and her both.

"Why?" she finally asked aloud, her breath creating a fog that swirled up to the top of the teepee and disappeared. She reached over and placed her hand against Sully's back, feeling his heartbeat strengthening by the moment. She allowed his beating heart to carry her away, and she closed her eyes, looking to the darkness…into the past.

"I didn't think we'd ever find each other again."

"But we did." His smile made her heart melt a little, and she stood on her tiptoes, wrapping her arms around his neck. They hugged again, and he inhaled the scent of her perfume and the soaps she used in her hair. It was taking all of his strength not to kiss her all over and whisk her away into the night.

When she finally pulled back, it was time. She took his hands in hers, and he leaned in closely, resting his forehead against hers. She smiled, closing her eyes for a moment.

"Michaela…I…"

"No," she whispered, placing her fingers against his lips. They were greeted by a tender kiss, and shivers flew up and down her spine. "I need to say it first. I didn't say it last time…I need to say it now." Sully nodded. When the wind picked up, Sully pulled her closer, and she tilted her head back. Her hair began to fly into her face again, and Sully smoothed it back with his hands, gently cupping the sides of her face. She smiled a little, her face flushing. "Sully…I love you too." Finally hearing it, Sully breathed a sigh of relief.

"I love you," he murmured, kissing the corner of her mouth, kissing her cheek, her forehead and her nose. She grinned, feeling his stubble tickling her flesh. It wasn't enough. Maybe it never would be. She needed more of him. She leaned into him, feeling him chuckle against her. She smiled, letting him draw it out a little longer; torturing her. She breathed a soft sigh, and finally…

"Sully," she whispered, bracing herself against him, as the cold air grew colder. "I love you so much."

Her eyes opened and tears spilled forth, as she remembered that fateful night. They had found one another again, and they had confessed their mutual love for one another. God that felt like a million years ago, but in truth they had only just found one another. Their star. Their star had brought them back together. Their relationship now was so, so new and different, yet she felt as if she had loved him all of her life and even before that. She felt as if she was more connected to him than she was with herself. It was a powerful feeling, and knowing that the man she loved with all of her heart was suffering the way he was broke her heart beyond imagination.

"Sully," she breathed. "Think of the stars. Think of our star." She closed her eyes again, and she brushed the tears away. "I don't want to do this without you. I don't want to lose you. Please…please, don't do this. Please don't go away. I need you so much. I don't think I ever realized how much until now."

She started to shake, and she felt as if she was standing on a precipice, looking down and afraid to fall. She didn't want to. She could see him on the other side, reaching for her hand, his crystal blue eyes telling her that if she jumped, he would catch her. He would never let her down. She knew it, but she was still terrified. She couldn't risk losing him. She couldn't risk pulling him down with her.

She let out a sob and rolled to her side, away from him. She covered her eyes with her hand and felt the warmth of her tears there.

But as she cried into her hand, her other hand felt his. She gasped softly, feeling his fingers curl around hers weakly. She didn't dare move for fear he'd stop. She needed this.

"Sully…"

"I'm here," he whispered hoarsely. "I…somethin'…" She finally sat up and turned to look at him. "What happened? I don't…" His voice was strained and forced.

"Shh," she soothed. "Don't try to move. You've been shot."

"Shot?"

"We were gathering water, and…"

"Some…somebody shot…shot at us?" Sully was shivering now, and Michaela pulled another blanket around him.

"It's over now," she assured him. "You need your rest."

"Are you hurt? Did they hurt you?" He tried to move, but the pain in his back stopped him. He groaned in frustration, and Michaela flinched, feeling the pain herself.

"I'm fine," Michaela promised. "I'm fine. Johnny's fine. We're both very worried about you."

"Who…" He tried to move, but the pain was too much. Michaela reached into her medical bag and grabbed a small packet of powder. "What is that?"

"It's morphine. It'll help with the pain."

"No. No. I don't want that. I can take it."

"Sully, I don't want to see you hurting," Michaela choked out.

"I'm fine. I got you here. I need you more than I need medicine." Michaela smiled a little and picked up his hand in hers, kissing his knuckles softly. She shivered at her boldness, and she nuzzled her cheek against his hand. "It's so good to hear your voice again." He sighed softly and closed his eyes.

"I'm tired, Michaela," he breathed, wincing in pain.

"I know," Michaela soothed, running her fingers through his hair. "Just rest now. You're going to be ok." She cleared her throat. "I do need to examine you. Would that be alright?" He nodded weakly, and Michaela lifted the blanket off of his back. "Tell me if I'm hurting you." She wiped a tear away and sniffled, gently removing the bandage from his wound. Sully winced when the cold hair hit his tender flesh. "I'm sorry."

"Not your fault," he said drowsily. He was barely awake now, and Michaela knew she needed to be quick.

"Sully? Sully? Are you still with me?" Her voice was cracking, and he gave a slow nod, his eyes still closed. "Good. Now, I need you to tell me if you can feel this." She moved her hands to his legs and gently ran them down his calves. "Can you feel that?"

"Oh yeah," Sully said slowly, trying to be funny, but he was too tired. Michaela grinned a little. "What's that for?"

"The bullet went in close to the spine, and I was afraid that the swelling might temporarily damage your nerves." Sully shook his head.

"I can feel…everything," he breathed.

"Good, sweetheart." She covered him up again. "Good."

"Huh," Sully said quietly, opening his eyes slowly to take in her face, as blurry as it was to his tired eyes.

"What?"

"Ya never…ya never called me that before." Michaela sniffled sadly and nodded her head. "I did. You just didn't hear me." Sully hummed softly.

"I think…I think I did." And with that, he was asleep again; too weak to fight sleep any longer. Michaela breathed a sigh of relief, and she bent down to kiss his cheek.

"You just sleep now. I'll stay here…right by your side."

December 1870 – St. Louis

Carrie paced the prison cell she was confined to. Prison was what it felt like. She couldn't leave. They wanted to keep her a while longer. Why? They wouldn't tell her anything, and they refused to tell Daniel anything, because they'd discovered that he wasn't her husband. Luckily, they were kind enough to let him continue to visit her, though he was being watched closely.

"I don't understand," Carrie said angrily. "They think I'm better off here." She sighed heavily. "It ain't fair, Daniel."

"They're just bein' careful, Carrie," he offered. "They wanna make sure you're ok."

"I'm fine. I'm fine. I wish somebody'd understand that. I'm here. I'm alive. I'm breathin'. I'm fine." She moved toward the window and looked out at the dusk skyline. Daniel moved up behind Carrie, being careful to give her her space. But, he wanted her to know that he was right there for her.

"You'll be outta here 'fore ya know it," Daniel said quietly. "Try not to think about it." Carrie shook her head.

"How can I not think about it?" She brushed the hair out of her eyes. "If I don't get outta here soon…Ow!" She clutched her stomach and doubled over in pain. Daniel moved swiftly to scoop her up into his arms. Not again. Why was this happening to her?

"Daniel…" The painful whisper of his name was followed by Carrie going limp in his arms, and he was left standing in the middle of her hospital room feeling helpless and scared to death. At that moment, a nurse walked in, stunned to see Daniel holding an unconscious Carrie, and a moment later, she was sprinting down the hallway to find a doctor. "C'mon Carrie. Stay with me. Stay with me."