Harry Potter woke with a start as bad as a Paralympic Athlete. A bright Khaki-Nordic-Orange-Biotransport (K.N.O.B for short) was outside his window, which still had a bar on it.
'Fuck off, Terrence' Harry yelled, and Terrence, the barkeeper, fucked off. Harry put on his glassess.
'Wiz cum 2 pick U up, blud' George Woggly said, coughing up a marble and a toothpick.
'Get rekt' Fred said, waving his hand about liek a fagit.
Harry jumped into the K.N.O.B and noticed Rin Woggly sat in the back seat, wearing a gymp suit wit his hands tied together.
After like a fuckload of years (3 hours to be precise), the K.N.O.B flew down at a set of Travik Lites, still hovering in plain view of Mugglesbians.
The K.N.O.B bounced about like a ghetto car and boomed loud music with sick lirikz: 'I have a big dick! I have have a big dick! I focked ya mum, and she guzzled my cu-'
The stereo stopped when Draquesha Muffloy shot it with an Intervention with ACOG:
'Get rekt!' He yelled, and drove away.
George and Fred leaned out the door windows. The Doors are a shitty band, but these K.N.O.B doors had controls for each window in the K.N.O.B, even the passanger doors had them. So, both twin Wogglys leaned out the window, but on the controls. George's window moves up and cuts his ear off, whilst Fred's moves at the speed of an angry Kenyan, beheading the ginger twat, killing him.
They opened the door after flying off again and pushed out Fred's body, which landed on a helicopter and was mutilated to the shit.
The gymp, wanka and now-deaf kid got hoe(m) safely. Their house was called the Muff Burrow. Named after one particular competition held anally their every June ... and May ... and Layla ... and Alisha...and ya mum! OOHOHOHOWRBGOWRBWICBIUWV! GET REKT 420 BLAZIT BRUV FUK OFF BICHT!
That's basically it, so Harry is about to start his second year at Genitalwarts School of Bitches and
A/N:
Hope you're enjoying this so far; just wait until they get to Genitalwarts! Lucious Muffloy is not happy :D :D
Also, you may have noticed Fred didn't die like this in DH, but this is what REALLY happened ;)