It's the chilly air that finally stirs me, but only when I notice Cato's shallow, rhythmic breathing do I truly realize how much time has elapsed.
I glance over at his still features, gentler in sleep, and trace every line with my eyes, indulging myself while I have the opportunity. At the Training Centre we quickly learn to guard ourselves from everyone – even the people we trust most. It's a lesson he and I grasped long before we came and it colors this moment between us, that he would relax so completely in my presence. It's the peak of vulnerability, especially here and now. Deep down I want to repay him and somehow return the generous gift.
More than anything, I want to touch him. He knows how I am about it, that my reaction is often visceral and violent, but I want to break that rule completely for him. Slowly, I lift my body over his slack arm and set myself against his side so that the entire length of my body rests against him. Gently I lay my head against his chest and wrap my hand around a fistful of his shirt for reassurance.
I don't relax at first. Slowly Cato's chest swells as he sucks in a long, waking breath and instantly I am absorbed in him again, my mind emptying of everything else the same way it did when he kissed me. Then silently his arm curls up around my exposed back, draping over my waist and pressing his fingers against my stomach. It's a simple gesture, but even half-awake he knows what it means. I melt against him, physically and mentally, allowing myself to drift off in the safety of this space. Somewhere in the back of my mind I know we'll be flogged if we sleep through roll-call, but this is worth it.