Spoby memory number 1 happened to me and my boyfriend when we were freshmen. Awkwaaard.
Next chapter is probably the one you guys have been waiting for. Just so you now. Get excited, because it's done and will be up when this gets to 120 reviews or in a week. Whatever happens first. We have to go back to the old games, because last chapter only got 4 reviews :(.
I have to go to work, and I don't wanna move. Can't Drown My Demons is almost done, and as long as I don't fall asleep at 10 pm like an old lady again it should be up later tonight.
Chapter 15
March
He laid sprawled out on the couch with his head in Spencer's lap. The blood transfusions always helped in the long run, but they were exhausting in the immediate hours after. He just felt completely wiped out. Like someone had sucked all the energy from his body. He couldn't move even if he wanted too. And there was just a genuine feeling of unwellness that scared the hell out of him.
Spencer reached out and grabbed his hand, bringing his knuckles to her lips. "You need to eat something, baby."
His stomach churned at the very thought of food. If he ate something he was very likely to puke all over her. "I don't think that I'll be able to keep anything down," he mumbled, leaning back to look at her. When he saw the pained look on her face he immediately backtracked. "But I guess I can try."
She paused, bending at her waist to press her lips to the top of his head. "Ice cream? It's light, and it might help your stomach."
He was about to tell her that he could get it for himself, but a sharp knock on the door cut him off. Few people came to visit them anymore. They were worried about disturbing him, which was stupid. Distractions were more than welcome.
Spencer gently lifted his head off her lap and nudged a pillow under his neck to take her place. "I'll be right back," she whispered.
He didn't even realize what he was doing as he reached out and snagged her wrist. "Hey," he murmured. "I love you, Spence."
She smiled and slid her had down and took his hand with a gentle squeeze. "I love you too." She let him go, disappearing down the entrance hall.
He leaned against his pillows and waited for her to come back.
She leaned against him, sharing in his warmth as they walked together down the broken up sidewalks near the UPenn dorms. "I don't want you to leave," she sighed. "It's always easier when you're here."
He pressed his lips to her hair for a long moment. "I don't want to leave either. But you'll be home next week for spring break." He shrugged out of his jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders. She obviously needed it more than he did.
"Aren't you cold?" She murmured, tucking her face into his chest as they hurried back to her dorm. He could feel her trembling, but he was never cold around her. Her presence warmed him more than any fire ever could.
He shook his head, but whatever he had been planning on saying left his mind as a red object flew in front of them. He tugged Spencer back as it splatted on the ground. "What the hell was that?"
"A tomato?" She asked, nudging it with her toe.
He kept a hold of her arm in case anymore flying vegetables came their way.
"Yes!" A voice yelled from one of the top floors of the nearest dorm. "It's a tomato, fresh from my garden! Well-" the voice paused. "I guess it's not so fresh anymore."
They just looked at each other for a log moment before dissolving into hysterical laughter and continuing on their way. Suddenly their forced separation didn't feel so bad.
"What the hell are you doing here?"
It wasn't often that he heard such a harsh, angry tone spill from his wife's lips. Spencer wasn't quite as even tempered as he was, but she was still characteristically calm and collected. It was a product of her environment. Emotional outbursts were unacceptable in the house of Hastings.
He struggled to pull himself up. "Spencer?" He wasn't sure how, but if she needed him he would get to the door somehow. He didn't care if he had to crawl.
But it didn't come to that. He heard her before he saw her. She ducked down in front of him and framed his face with her hands. The mocha color of her eyes was cloudy with concern. "It's your dad. Do you want to talk to him or should I make him leave?" She punctuated her sentence with an angry glare over his shoulder, leaving no doubts that his dad followed her into the living room.
As adorable as he found her anger, he didn't like it when it was on his behalf. He didn't want to make anything harder on her, but he couldn't help but think that her annoyance with him was well-deserved. The last time they had seen him left a lot to be desired.
She trailed a hand down his arm until it came in contact with his hand. Their fingers laced together of their own accord. They didn't even have to think about doing things like that anymore. Their bodies were so intuned to each other that it just happened.
She pulled him to a stop just outside of his childhood house. "You don't have to do t
his if you don't want too."
He smiled halfheartedly and pulled her down for a kiss. He hadn't seen his dad since he accused him of . "I'm sure. It probably won't go well, but I think- I don't know, I guess I just think it's the right thing to do. He invited us."
"He invited you," she reminded him. "I'm just here to support you, but maybe he'll react better if I'm not here."
Toby rolled his eyes. "Everybody loves you, Spencer. You can just be a bit intimidating."
"Good! Because he's not going to treat you like that ever again! After the last time, after everything he let happen to you he's going to treat you right."
He couldn't help but kiss her after that impassioned little speech. He got so lucky with Spencer. "I love you," he whispered.
She smirked. "Everyone does," she laughed through his earlier words. "But I love you the most. Let's go talk to your dad."
But no matter know hard they knocked on the door no one ever answered. It was after about a minute Spencer noticed the paper taped to the frame. She ripped it off and handed it to him. "That unimaginable bastard."
He quickly scanned the letter and sighed, handing it to Spencer. He had to help Jenna with something. Of course he did. Because when would he ever put Toby first? That's not what he did. He didn't know if he was still trying to get over his mother's death or if he just genuinely didn't like him, but his dad would never pick him.
The passenger side of the truck opened almost as soon as his shut. He expected Spencer to yell, but she just slid across the bench seat and into his side, reaching across his lap for his hand. "I'm so sorry."
It might have been a terrible idea, but he always hoped for a better relationship with his dad. He always hoped that he would finally find it in his heart to love him. But seeing him for the first time in six years like this wasn't exactly ideal. That reunion was best done from a place of strength, but right now he couldn't even stand up by himself.
But could he really pass up this opportunity? "No, I'll talk to him." He reached out a hand. "Can you help me up?" He hated to ask her for anything, but it was necessary.
"Of course," she murmured and pulled him up to a sitting position. She arranged a pillow behind his back and pressed a gentle kiss to his hairline. "We'll be right back, okay?"
He wanted to stop her, but she would probably scratch his eyes out. He nodded and listened to her walk away. The angry tone of her voice was all that he could hear. The fridge opened and shut, and he could only assume Spencer was trying to get him some food.
"Toby?"
He sat up straighter, a product of his father's childhood habit of telling him not to slouch. "Hey dad." He tensed as the man who was supposed to protect him sat across from him. He just couldn't get past the fact that every time Jenna touched him, every time she manipulated him it was in this man's house. But that wasn't even the worst of it. The worst part was that he believed he could have hurt Jenna like that. That wasn't who he was.
"Toby I-" he hesitated, looking up at the ceiling. "God, this is a long time coming, but I was embarrassed. I didn't know what to do, but I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I didn't believe you. I help raise you, Toby. I know who you are, and I know you could never do something like that. I was just so hurt by losing your mother, and I didn't know how to handle it. You're so much like her."
Toward the end of his dad's apology Spencer came in with a bowl of ice cream and a cocktail of pills. "I'm sorry for interrupting, but Toby, you need to take your pills." She sat them down on the coffee table. "I'll just leave you two to talk."
He caught her wrist as she turned to walk away. "Stay."
She looked at him, trying to determine his sincerity before nodding and sitting next to him. He immediately put his free hand on her knee and turned back to his dad. "I stopped being mad at you a long time ago, dad. It hurt. It still hurts, but I get it."
"I love you, Toby," his dad said softly. "I always have, and I'm sorry it took something like this to get me here to tell you. How's your health?"
"I'm okay." He didn't need sympathy, especially from his dad. He forgave him, but he certainly didn't expect him to be an active part of his life.
Spencer squeezed his hand and elaborated for him. "He just finished his radiation treatment, and now he's been getting blood transfusions."
His dad nodded with his lips pressed hard together. "I need to get going, but would it be okay if I came to visit again soon?"
He nodded silently. He wouldn't hold his breath, but it'd be nice if he did come to visit. Spencer glanced at him before looking at his dad. "Can you find your way out?"
"I'll see you all soon." He rose from the chair and left.
As soon as he was gone Spencer leaned forward and handed him the ice cream and pills. "You need to take these, at the very least." She adjusted and leaned against the couch's arm and pulled him against his chest.
He swallowed the pills and took a small bite of the ice cream before pushing it away and closing his eyes. If he did have Spencer, what would he have? Who would he be? Nothing, was the only answer he could come up with. She's saved him so many times, and this was just one more. It didn't take him long to fall asleep, the pills always made him drowsy.
His dreams were full of happier times, but when he woke up a little while later he had no memory of them. All he could focus on was the searing pain in his chest. He rolled over just in time to avoid puking on Spencer. He emptied his stomach onto the carpet over and over again.
He knew that Spencer was away by the subtle shifting beneath him. He curled against her chest and rubbed a soothing pattern out against his spine. "Toby," she breathed. "Oh baby." She pulled the afghan from the back of the couch and draped it over them. "I need to call Dr. Green."
He was shaking too hard to answer her. Everything hurt. He was exhausted, and tremors ran through his whole body. He had felt sick throughout the course of his energy, but this was different. This was scary. It came out of no where, and it came in the midst of something that was supposed to make him feel better. Spencer's low murmurs as she talked on the phone was the only thing that kept him together. She was there. She was there, and she was holding him together like she always did. She loved him, ad she wouldn't leave him. It didn't matter what he was going through.
His fingers grabbed at her thin, tank top, just wanting her to be closer. Her arms enveloped him as readily as her smell, soothing him in the way that only she could. "We need to get to the hospital, baby. Can you walk?"
"No," he whispered. He was pathetic. He couldn't even move from this position, if he was being completely honest. His trembling legs wouldn't support him, and even if they could he wouldn't be able to hold himself up.
She nodded. "Hang in there. I'm going to call 911."
For the first time since all of this started he was genuinely concern. Was he going to die? And if he did what would happen to Spencer? What would happen to his friends and his family? What could he do to make it easier on them?
He had an idea.