Author's note: KILL ME KILL ME PLEASE

Ben 10's Hottest Summer Ever

Chapter 2: Baby I was born that far away

Ben and Gwen managed to shove their wasted Grandpa back into the Fuckbucket which they'd appropriately renamed it to after a few days and get back on the road for their best summer vacation road trip ever.

"This is the best summer vacation ever!" Ben shouted happily, his face covered with his cousin's unmentionable bodily fluids. "And that was a real good breakfast!"

"Of course! There's nothing like fresh milk, if you get my point!" she said, nudging her cousin with her elbow. "Get it? Get it?!"

"Ha ha yeah I get it, now quit fucking touching me, nerd!" Ben shoved his dumbass yet hotly fuckable cousin away. Fucking nerds.

"Fine, fuck you then, asshole! I'll just be over here entertaining myself, without a cock!" Gwen went back to writing shitty Sumo Slammers porno fan fiction on her laptop. "And then Ishiyama and Kenko's dicks touched, thereby uniting the world in peace and prosperity, forever. Until the rape ninjas attacked the next morning just seven hours before their new baby was to be born."

"Shut the fuck up, you kids! I'm trying to sleep off a hangover here," Max grunted. He went back to snoring rather quickly. After a few minutes he began to mumble while grabbing at his clothed erection. "Oh, Phil. I missed you so much. Come over here, baby. Let me take away your concealed emotional pain. With my big gun. That's a euphemism for something else. It's very hard and happy to see your butt." He farted gently, moaning in pleasure.

"Everyone but me is so fucking boring," Ben groaned. "That's it, I'm going outside to masturbate!"

Fuming, Ben stormed to the RV's door and opened it, only to be greeted once again by that psychotic geneticist, Dr. Animo.

"This is payback for raping me and then accusing me of pedophilia, you retarded little brat!" the weird old fart screamed before unleashing his latest energy transmo-whatsis on Ben.

"NOOOOOOO, I'M TOO KAWAII TO DIE!" Ben screamed as he got covered in nasty oOo rays.

A sudden horrific transformation took place; Ben grew some kawaii kitty ears and a tail, which made him even more shota-dorable.

"What the ever-loving fuck?" Ben gasped, starting with wide eyes at his new fluffy tail and fuzzy ears. D'aw. I threw up in my mouth a little.

"Ah, hell! This plan completely backfired on me because now I actually do want to molest and possibly rape you!" Dr. Animo admitted. "I think I'll just kill myself before I get any worse characterization."

With that statement, Dr. Animo rotated the dial on his pseudo-scientific what-cha-majig, causing a power surge fluctuation that looped back through his makeshift colander helmet and caused his head to explode.

"That was awesome," said Ben, looking over the deceased doctor's splattered grey matter. "Meanwhile, now I'm a fucking cat. But I guess I'll adapt."

Ben shrugged and walked off, swinging his arms and singing happily to himself about how awesome he was.

"I'M A KID, AND I WANT TO HAVE FUN, BUT IF YOU NEED A PUSSY FUCKING, I CAN GET THE JOB DONE!"

Then a car hit him.

"Ow, shit! WHO THREW THAT!" Ben rubbed his head gingerly as he looked around for a culprit.

"It's me, Kevin fucking Levin!" shouted Kevin, having picked up another car and was about to chuck it at his evil yet sexy nemesis, Ben.

"Kevin, you're such an ugly fuckwit," Ben growled. "You're just jealous of my skills and all the chicks I get to knock up, even though I'm fucking 10 years old."

"Nah, ur gay."

"UR GAY!"

"NO U!"

"Someday I will fuck your cousin, you bitch," Kevin declared. Then he ran away crying. What, you thought this would lead somewhere? Chuh. Try a few more chapters onward.

"I'm so bored. I wish I had someone who was actually cool to fight," Ben grumbled.

Suddenly, VILGAX!

Vilgax's dildo-shaped ship landed on the ground a few dozen feet away from our designated hero and the door opened. Vilgax walked out, looking all imposing and gigantic and buff and vaguely cthulhu-like. Wearing his fucking BDSM gear.

"Ben Tennyson!" Vilgax shouted while pointing his claws at Ben. "I will rape you until you like it!"

Ben turned around and gasped dramatically at the camera which wasn't really there while pulling down his sunglasses which he didn't really have.