"Some idea of what to do on your shore leave?
Jim was leaning against the back wall in the officers' mess, watching what happened in front of him with a glass of brandy in his hand. Not replicated brandy, for once. The Enterprise was ferrying a group of Vulcan and human delegates to a conference in beta quadrant. It was the kind of mission that Jim hated, one where nothing exciting ever happened and he had to put up with a bunch of snooty bureaucrats and their assistants wandering around his ship, making absurd questions and insisting in observing protocol. They had too many of these lately.
However, not everything was bad. Having these people on board meant that, at least in the welcome and farewell receptions, they served decent alcohol and every member of the crew would enjoy a day of shore leave before starting their next mission.
It was a pity that the conference was not celebrated on a planet, somewhere where they could enjoy a little bit of fresh air, but Jim was not complaining. He had checked in advance the facilities of the station. It had several decent restaurants and two or three interesting clubs. Not so fancy that he couldn't let himself go but classy and expensive enough to minimize the risk of any member of his crew finding him in an embarrassing situation.
"I wouldn't call it shore leave, Jim. It's not even a full day off."
McCoy was by his side, their shoulders touching, watching carefully what was going on the mess reconverted into a reception hall. Theoretically, they should be mingling with their guests, but the night was about to finish and they both had fulfilled more than enough with their share of trivial talk. So he guessed that nobody would protest if they took a break now that some of the guests had started to leave.
"We have only two days and I want that everybody have some time at the base," Jim shrugged. "But we have a night off and almost a full day to recover from the hangover. What do you say? You game?"
"I have no choice," Bones turned his head to look at him and hid a smile behind his glass. "Someone has to be sure that you come back home safely."
"Awesome!" Jim said, ignoring the comment. "It'll be like in old times."
The last month he had made an effort to spend more time with Bones. It had been easier than he expected and he had enjoyed it. It was not usual that the CMO joined the away missions, unless they were medical related, but there wasn't any regulation that forbade it, so Jim had started to include him as often as it was possible. Maybe Bones would protest about having to use the transporter, but his mood improved as soon as he had his feet on solid earth.
He had added the sickbay to the departments that he visited daily. Truth was that he had nothing to inspect, Bones ruled over his dominion with a firm hand and everything there run smoothly, but if his friend was not busy when Jim appeared they could hide in his office and talk for a while. Bones had looked suspicious the first few times, but had not chased him away so Jim considered that a victory.
They had dined together almost every night. Frequently with Spock and Uhura and sometimes with Sulu and Chekov too. Now and then, however, they had stayed alone in Jim's cabin and, except for some random call from the bridge before dessert, it had been almost as good as when they shared a room at the Academy.
Jim had to admit that he liked to have Bones closer. Until he had heard it again, he hadn't noticed how much he missed Bones' sarcasm. Jim was looking forward his reaction when he told him that he had signed them up for the first bowling championship of the Enterprise. Bones was a hopeless player.
"Spock is coming with us," Jim added looking at the Vulcan, who was speaking with a delegate by the drinks table. "I think that Uhura is going to have dinner with Chapel and Rand."
"Spock?" Bones arched an eyebrow. "And how's that going to be like old times?" The half-smile in his face, however, told Jim that he didn't mind the company.
"Not that part," he admitted. "But he was going to stay on board, working, and Uhura asked me to take him with us. She plans to leave Christine and Janice at midnight and has something planned for them that wouldn't work if she has to come and get Spock on the ship. I couldn't say no. She doesn't ask for favors too often."
"And you want an ace up your sleeve for the next time you screw it up and she wants to kill you." McCoy sighed. "All right, if you can convince him I guess it'll be interesting."
"But after that is you and me. And all the bars we can visit in one night."
"That can be not as long as you think, Jim. It's a quite small star base."
"Ah, that's where you're wrong," Jim said patting his friend's shoulder. "Maybe the options won't be as varied as if we were on Risa, but I've seen what they serve on some of the places there, Bones. We're going to need..."
"Captain?"
Jim turned to look at the woman standing in front of him and a smile appeared on his face when he recognised her. He had been looking for the chance of enjoying some private time with her since he had greeted her in the transport room at her arrival to the Enterprise but, until now, that had not been possible.
"Miss Veccio." Jim greeted. "I hope you're having a nice evening."
"Of course I am." The girl said, giving him back a smile that showed just what Jim wanted to see. "Your crew is going out of their way to make our travel agreeable. And I have to say that your ship is amazing."
"Thank you, we are quite proud of her."
"With good reasons, judging by what I see." Jim noticed the girl moving almost imperceptibly closer to him and, without hesitation, he moved a little away from the wall, closing the distance between them a little more. "I've heard that the botany bay of the ship is especially interesting and I've still had not got the chance of visiting it. I was wondering if you may be so kind to show it to me. I mean, if I I'm not interrupting something important."
The girl sent a brief look at Bones, who had been watching the scene in silence, before returning her attention to Jim. He did not even need to look at his friend to know that Bones was making an impressive effort to not roll his eyes and let out a snort. Even so, he reacted even faster than Jim.
"Of course not," the doctor said. "In fact, Captain, I need to speak to Lieutenant Jeffries tonight, so if you excuse me..."
Before Jim could answer, McCoy bowed lightly and disappeared between the guests. Jim knew perfectly well that there wasn't a Lieutenant Jeffries on the ship but he and Bones had been using that line, or a similar one, every time one of them needed an excuse to move out of the picture and leave the other one alone with a girl. In fact, Bones had used it a lot more than him. Jim was not sure when the last time he had seen his friend leave with someone was. Maybe he should do something about it on the next shore leave. Maybe. That wouldn't be until two nights later and he had more urgent things to worry about.
"Shall we go?" Jim asked, offering his arm to the girl. "It's not far."
The corridors of the Enterprise were almost totally silent when Jim walked back to his cabin that night. The visit to the botany bay had been brief, but he had not expected something different. The chemistry between him and Miss Veccio, Sonia, he corrected himself without hiding a satisfied smile, had been undeniable from the beginning. She was smart, cheeky and a lot hotter than the assistants of diplomats used to be.
It was a chance that Jim couldn't let pass. The sex life of a Captain of the Fleet was desperately depressing. Of course he had met a certain number of beautiful and exotic women, but regulations put every woman of his crew out of limits for him and it was in the Enterprise where Jim spent most of his time so... Abstinence was something he was not used and he didn't like it.
After leaving Sonia deeply sleeping on her bed, he was on an excellent mood. Too good to waste it sleeping. He enjoyed the moments when most of the crew was resting and he could imagine that he had the ship just for himself, so instead of going back to his bed he decided to go for a long walk around the empty corridors. At first, he had intended to go down to engineering, but for some obscure reason his feet had taken him to sickbay and the closed door of the holodeck. He had not gone back there since the night he had seen Bones in Brennon's and he was sure that his friend had not noticed the intrusion. Or, if he had noticed, Bones had decided to ignore it, because every time he had spoken about the holodeck it had been only regarding the official project. The first report had been sent and the answer received from Earth had been more than positive.
Keeping in mind that Bones didn't seem to need to improve his technique anymore and the amount of time they had been spending together, Jim was ready to bet that Bones had stopped visiting his double. He had no reasons to do it. Not when he had the original back. However, it wouldn't do any harm to take another look and be sure.
He didn't want to pry, he told himself while he typed his override code. He only needed to know that his best friend didn't miss him anymore. He'd go in, check that the computer that only kept registers of Bones' patients and leave. Less than five minutes and he wouldn't need to intrude again.
But Bones had not stopped using the holodeck, Jim found as soon as he set his eyes on the records. Maybe not as often, because Jim had taken on a lot of his free time, but even so he had been there at least twice a week. If he'd appeared only half an hour earlier, he noticed checking astonished the date of the last register, they'd have crossed at the door.
Why? Bones was not a fan of official receptions. He kept insisting that he wasn't on board with the political manoeuvring but, even if he didn't enjoy them, he was very good at that kind of things. And that night had been unusually relaxed. Jim wouldn't dare to say that Bones had enjoyed it, but he wouldn't think that he'd need a drink after it.
Without giving himself time to doubt, Jim started the last simulation and turned his chair to look at the screen. What he saw was very similar to what he had already seen. Bones with fake him, hanging out in Brennon's. And Bones seemed to be in an excellent mood. He fixed his eyes on the fake Jim, trying to guess what had he done to put that smile in his friend's face. Nothing that he would have not done before, probably better, he decided frowning.
Physically, his double was an almost perfect copy of himself, but the way he acted was all wrong. He spoke too much, moved his hands a little too wildly, laughed too loud. Not that Jim could hear what he was saying. The record had sound, but he was watching it in silence. One thing was to watch what was happening and a very different one was to spy on another person's converation. From his point of view that would be violating his friend's privacy.
And he was too close to give in to temptation to his taste, so Jim turned the computer off and left the room. This time he returned to his cabin following the more direct route. He undressed, carefully folded the dress uniform that he had worn to the reception and hung it on his dresser. Then he stretched out on his bed, determined to forget the matter, and closed his eyes, but sleep didn't come.
After his evening with Sonia, Jim had been sure that he'd sleep like a baby, but now he only could think about Bones. Every time he closed his eyes he saw his friend and his double in front of him. He couldn't believe that Bones would miss him. Not after the few last weeks. It had to be some other thing, but what? He doubted that fake Jim would be funnier or more intelligent or nicer than him. What the hell? He was the original and the original was always the best. But it had to be something. Something that went further than the need of a drink, because not even in their worst moments in the Academy he had visited Brennon's so often.
He just didn't get it. Of course he always could go and speak with Bones, he thought, but to do that he'd have to confess that he had been spying him. And if he knew his friend at all he wasn't going to be happy about it, so that option was discarded. Unfortunately, he had nobody to discuss the matter. Or maybe he had?
Suddenly, a crazy idea filled his brain. It was absurd and, if Bones ever found it out he wasn't going to only be pissed off. He'd probably ask for a transfer to the more remote star base that he could find and wouldn't speak to him ever again. Sometimes, however, you had to take a risk and that was a risk that he could control.
He gave a glance to the clock on his night table. He didn't need an alarm, the computer took care of waking him every morning an hour and a half before the beginning of his shift, but that clock had been a present from Bones in their first year on the Academy. He had been very close of receiving a demerit for being late to class twice in the same week and the old fashioned clock had appeared one afternoon on his night table and kept him out of problems, so of course he still used it. It was late but experience told him that the person he needed wouldn't be still in bed and the computer confirmed that Bones was in his cabin, probably sleeping like a log.
If he wanted to do it, this moment was as good as any other. It was likely better than most. As soon as he made the decision, Jim jumped from the bed and dressed again with the first thing that he found in his dresser, jeans so worn that they almost had holes, and a black uniform shirt. He went out of his cabin, walked the five metres that separated his quarters from Spock's and knocked.
It would have been easier and faster to cross through their shared bathroom, of course, but after the embarrassing morning when he had found his first officer in flagrante with Uhura, Jim only used that way when he knew for sure that Spock was waiting for him. The Vulcan took more time than Jim expected, but after a little waiting the door opened and Spock appeared, dressed in the tunic that he wore to meditate.
"Captain." The Vulcan greeted him, apparently undisturbed for finding his commanding officer at his door in the middle of the night.
"Spock." Jim said in what he hoped was a perfectly ordinary voice. "I'm sorry to disturb you so late, but I need your opinion about something."
"Of course." The Vulcan took a step back, inviting him in, when Jim gave no hint of wanting to start talking right away.
"No. Not here. You have to see something." Jim gestured to the corridor. "It's personal."
Spock arched a brow almost imperceptibly, but he followed Jim to the corridor and allowed the door to close at his back. They walked silently the short distance to the medical bay. To Jim, it was a clear evidence of how much their relationship had improved in the last months that the Vulcan didn't react when he typed his override code on the holodeck's door. Only when they were inside, Spock broke the silence.
"Does doctor McCoy know that we're here?"
"No. And I'll thank you if you don't tell him," Jim ignored the almost imperceptible reproach in his first officer's eyes. "Do you remember the night when Bones told us about his problems with the holodeck?"
"I do not suffer from any diminution of memory and that event took place only a few weeks ago, so of course I remember. However, since Doctor McCoy has not mentioned again his issues with that matter and that all the communications from the Fleet regarding the holodeck project have been eminently positive, I assumed that he had overcome his difficulties."
"Yes, I know. But some weeks ago he was spending so much time here that I thought it would be a good idea to take a glance and see how things were going. Only so I could help if he needed it. You know how he is. He doesn't like to ask for help." Jim shrugged and started typing on the nearest computer terminal, looking for one of McCoy's sessions. "And I found a lot like this."
"Captain, this is a clear violation of doctor McCoy's privacy."
"Maybe, if we only wanted to poke around, but that's not the case. We're here to help. Bones would like it if he knew."
Spock's arched brow said very loudly that he didn't agree, but he kept silent and sat in the free chair, so Jim ignored it, pushed the button to start the reproduction and waited.
It was one of the recordings that Jim had not seen, but again it was a variation of the same theme. There was subtle differences, however. This time he was there before Bones arrived and they spent a long time at the bar, talking to other patrons, before moving to their table. And whatever fake Jim was telling him should be important, because that nuisance didn't seem able to stop talking. All that Bones was doing was listening and say a word here and there.
Besides that, he was moving his arms in an exaggerated way, Jim decided. Of course, he was conscious that he himself talked a lot with his hands, he was not stupid, but that was too much. If he looked for the details, he thought, the similarity with his double was not as exact like the ones that Bones had got with the rest of the patrons. Maybe that was why he kept going back there, because he still had not got Jim just right. He was still looking for differences when the recording finished. With a sigh, he turned the screen off and turned toward Spock.
"So," Jim asked, "what do you think?"
"Of course, this is not a scenery that I have had the chance to visit in real life, but the realism and the level of detail present in the simulation result impressive. Either Doctor McCoy has invested many hours of his free time in this project or he undervalued his abilities in a great way in first place."
"He didn't. Believe me." Jim grimaced. "He was not exaggerating at all, but I wasn't speaking about that. I need to know what you think about... that," he added waving to the screen. "Why do you think Bones have chosen to work on something like that?"
"The proposal was that he focused on something comfortable, familiar, and judging by what I see, it seems he has reached his goal with a noticeable success."
"Yes, of course. We knew that Bones was going to be fine as soon as he got the knack of it." Jim discarded Spock's comment without giving it a second thought. "I wasn't talking about that either. He could have recreated whatever he wanted, anything in the galaxy. And he has been coming here, night after night, and having a beer with me. Why?"
"Maybe Doctor McCoy does not wish something more exotic." Spock said as if it was the most evident thing in the world. "Maybe this is what he wants."
"That was what I thought. That maybe he missed me because lately we have not been spending as much time together as we used. So I've been looking for time so we can be together. I swear to you that if he wants a drink with me, he doesn't need to come here and hang out with a bad copy of me, but he keeps returning almost every night. What do you think?" he pressed when the Vulcan didn't seem to have any comment to do.
"About Doctor McCoy's behaviour?"
"Of course. Why do you think he does it?"
"Captain, I doubt I am the most suitable person to express an opinion about that topic. My assumption is that this is a matter of a personal nature, probably merely emotional, and in both those aspects you are better than me to extract conclusions."
"Maybe I am, but I can see what happens. There's something that I can't get." Jim shrugged. "I don't know, maybe in this case logic would help. Even if we're speaking of Bones," he added seeing Spock's sceptical arched bow.
"Doctor McCoy won't be happy if he ever finds what we are doing."
"He doesn't have to know it. And it's for his own good."
"For some reason, I doubt he has the same perspective about this matter."
"I won't tell him if you don't do it. Come on, Spock. Help me here. If you don't do it I'll keep worrying about Bones. And you know how bad that will be for my efficiency and for the crew's moral. Please."
Jim fixed his eyes in Spock and waited. What he was asking for was not as crazy as some of the things that Jim had proposed him in the last few months, but he knew that the Vulcan wouldn't like to risk Bones' confidence. Even if he was not going to admit it aloud, Jim knew that Spock held the doctor's friendship in high regard.
"In order to have enough data to extract valid conclusions, I would need to analyse several more simulations." Spock said after a long moment. "That would allow to stablish similarities and differences and stablish a pattern of behaviour. Accessing to the audio file would be useful too."
"No." Jim shook his head. "That would be prying a little too much. Besides it's me... I mean, the other me, who talks most of the time. We wouldn't find anything useful listening."
"It could be a significant subject, since doctor McCoy was who programmed his behaviour. If you're looking for answers, it would not be logical to discard any source of information even before starting to explore its possibilities."
"Bones wouldn't like it." Jim refused to accept even when he couldn't deny that it was a reasonable argument.
"Maybe, if he would discover what we are doing but, using your own words, he will not know if we are careful."
Jim opened his mouth to argue and closed it again. It was typical of Spock, using his own words against him, but he had to admit that they were so right now as half an hour before. If he asked to the computer to warn him if the CMO left his cabin, it wasn't possible that Bones could catch them. And it was for his own good. It was obvious that there was something that he needed and wasn't going to ask for and, as his best friend, it was his duty to find what it was and give it to him. If, in order to do that, he had to do something that his friend wouldn't like too much... Well, in his past he had made worse decisions for worse reasons.
"Of course," Jim sighed finally. "Choose yourself."
Jim left himself fall against the back of his chair and waited while Spock chose a new recording. He didn't know what selection criteria the Vulcan was using, but it seemed that it was taking him forever. The result, nevertheless was not very different as what Jim was starting to feel sick of seeing.
Watching it with sound, however, was a very different experience. If Spock was expecting something revealing in those talks, Jim doubted that he would find it. Bones and fake Jim were just there, talking about work, about the crew, about... a little bit of everything. His friend's sarcasm showed up here and there, often at the expense of the other patrons, but there was not personal conversation.
In the next four hours, Jim didn't hear anything that he wouldn't have heard or said himself before. He truly hoped that Spock would have found something useful, because he was as in the dark now as he was at the beginning of the night. When the screen finally turned off his muscles were stiff, he had a growing headache, and wanted to go to bed and sleep at least two or three hours before his daily date for breakfast with Bones. Even so, he forced himself to shift his chair and look at his first officer. This time, it was him who arched a questioning brow.
"What I have just seen, for itself, does not reveal more than a wish of enjoying a friend's company." Spock answered after thinking about it for a moment. "That's evident."
He already knew that, Jim thought. And he didn't need four hours of watching Bones with that moron to deduce it. He was ready to say it aloud when Spock decided to continue talking.
"However, for all those who have got the chance to watch you two together, especially when you are not in the ship, the difference is clearly perceptible.
"Is it?" Jim asked leaning forward in his chair.
"It is, for every person that has spent a shore leave with you," the Vulcan confirmed. "And it is that difference what allows me to deduce what Doctor McCoy is looking for with that specific simulation."
"And what's that?" Jim pressured when Spock stopped talking again.
"I am afraid that is not my place to tell you," the Vulcan answered. "I am probably not the most suitable person to judge the doctor's emotional needs, but I think that I can understand what he is doing and why. So, if he has decided not to speak about this matter, I should not do it either. I am sorry. I cannot help you, captain.
And before Jim had the chance of uttering another word his first officer had gone, leaving behind him a closed door, an overwhelming silence and a totally confused Jim.