Chapter 91

April 7th 1871 – Boston

The luggage was loaded onto the private sleeper car that Sully and Michaela had decided to rent for the trip back home. Michaela and Rebecca said goodbye to Marjorie, wishing her well on her new life at the Quinn house. Marjorie had assured them that Martha and Harrison would keep their jobs, and she was looking forward to moving on with her life, even if that meant not having a husband and children to share it with.

"You'll come back and visit?" Marjorie asked, trying not to let her tears fall.

"Of course," Michaela said with a grin. "But remember that you have an invitation to the wedding. I'd love for you to be a part of it, so if you can make it…" Marjorie nodded her head.

"I'll do my best, Michaela," she assured her. The two embraced, and Michaela sighed softly.

"I love you, Marjorie."

"I love you too," her older sister replied. Finally, they pulled out of the hug, and Michaela stepped back to let Rebecca say her goodbyes. When she felt a hand on her lower back, she turned, seeing Sully smiling at her.

"Ready to go?"

"Yes," she breathed. She looked around, panicking for a moment. "Where are the children?"

"On the train with the Reverend. They're pickin' out their beds. Johnny's bunkin' with me, and Rebecca said she'd keep Mary and Gabby with her. Michaela nodded, looking forward to heading home, but she'd miss her sister, Martha, and Harrison. "We best get on the train." Michaela nodded, as a warning whistle sounded, and she followed Sully up from the platform and onto the train, heading into the comfortable looking car.

"It's beautiful," she said with an approving smile.

"I found my bed," Johnny said, coming out of one of the compartments.

"Make sure there's two beds in there, son. We're sharin'." The boy let out an audible groan.

"But, can't I have my own?"

"Sorry, but we got more people goin' home than we had comin' to Boston." Johnny frowned, but he moved over to sit in one of the seats out in the middle of the compartments, while Michaela found a comfortable compartment and carefully tucked away the documents and money she'd received from her mother's will. But, she kept her mother's journal out, figuring that once she grew tired, she could read some of it before she went to sleep. She still hadn't had the chance to begin reading it, however, because Rebecca had finally worked up the courage to finish her mother's last pages. Now, it was in Michaela's hands, and she hoped to God that her own reading of it would be easier than her sister's.

The train's whistle sounded again, and Michaela moved to a window, searching for Rebecca in the crowd. She was relieved to find Rebecca rushing up the steps from the platform and onto the train. Timothy hurried out to help her in case the train jolted.

It was going to be close quarters for a week, but Michaela figured she could live with that, considering everyone was on much better terms with the Reverend, and the children seemed to get along. She couldn't help but notice Mary's disposition changing a bit, but she was sure that once they got back to Colorado, she'd feel much better. She hoped so, anyway. But, nevertheless, she was distracted from her thoughts, when Sully walked up behind her, placing his hands on her shoulders and gently squeezing them. She smiled, leaning against his chest and looking up at him before turning in his arms.

"Feelin' alright?"

"Perfect," she answered, her eyes sparkling with happiness. "Forty three more days until our wedding." She blushed heavily. "I counted last night." Sully laughed.

"I can beat that. I was about to start countin' down the hours." Michaela chuckled, as Sully pulled her closer and kissed her, causing her to moan softly. A clearing throat interrupted them, and both pulled back from the kiss to see Timothy and Rebecca standing there nervously.

"Sorry," he said. "Ah…just…wanted to make sure everybody was here." Michaela blushed, and she nodded.

"Everyone's accounted for, Reverend," she assured him, as Mary, Johnny, and Gabby poked their heads out of their compartments, and Rebecca went to join her daughter. Timothy nodded, and his cheeks reddened as he passed by. When he'd entered his compartment, Michaela and Sully leaned their heads together and laughed quietly, their eyes telling the same story. And when Sully brought Michaela's lips to his in another kiss, the train jolted and began to inch its way down the tracks. Michaela and Sully held onto one another and an overhead bar tightly to keep their balance, and they couldn't resist one more kiss, as the train broke free from the station and started out toward Colorado Springs.

After a few hours aboard the train, Gabby had fallen asleep in her bunk, so Mary ventured out of the compartment and into the small sitting room that had been created so they wouldn't have to feel so confined to their compartments. Fortunately, everyone was napping, so Mary sat down in the seat next to the window and watched the land pass by her. She had said goodbye to Boston again, but her best memories were of her time in Colorado Springs.

She smiled, thinking of the times she and Johnny went to the creek after school and she came home all dirty. Sure, she'd been scolded, but not too terribly, especially after her grandmother had gone back to Boston.

Continuing to stare out at the land, her thoughts moved to the reasons she'd been so upset with Johnny over the past month. Sure, she was upset with him for spending more time with Gabby than he was with her, but it was more than that. Sometimes she snapped at him without meaning to. She didn't know why and it upset her. She figured that part of the reason he was with Gabby more was because Gabby didn't snap at him every time he tried to talk to her. She knew that if she wanted to keep her friendship with him, she was going to have to try to get past her jealousy. But she didn't know how.

She sighed, oblivious to the pair of eyes watching her. She leaned her elbows against the windowsill and closed her eyes, feeling the sun's warmth hit her face through the glass.

"Mary?" She jumped, gasping and turning toward him.

"Hi," she said, her eyes looking into his.

"Ain't you gonna sleep?"

"I'm not tired," she replied, suppressing a yawn. "It's only the afternoon."

"But there ain't much else to do." Mary shrugged her shoulders.

"That's ok. I'd rather be up." She turned to sit back in her seat, and Johnny sat down in the seat across from her.

"You wanna play cards?"

"No."

"Jacks?"

"No."

"Cowboys?"

"That's a boy's game," Mary replied, making a face. Johnny sighed, and he slumped down in his seat.

"Ya used to play that with me. What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing!" Mary insisted. Johnny watched her for a moment, trying to figure out what to say to her.

"What'd ya mean yesterday?"

"What?"

"When ya told me to go play with Gabby; ya were sure it was what we both wanted." He saw her look away. "Are ya jealous?"

"Why would I be jealous!" she asked angrily. Johnny swallowed hard.

"I…don't know. I just…ya don't gotta be, Mary. I mean…me and Gabby are just friends…like me and you." Mary looked down. "I thought you and Gabby were getting along?" Mary didn't answer. "Mary, me and you know what it's like to lose somebody they love. She just lost her ma, and…and she needs friends."

"Johnny? Mary?" Both looked over to see Gabby tiredly coming out of one of the compartments. Johnny tried to share a glance with Mary, but she wouldn't meet his eyes.

"Hey Gabby," Johnny said, clearing his throat, as she sat down next to him. Neither one of them saw the tears form in Mary's eyes. "Couldn't sleep?"

"No," she said quietly, resting her head against the seat. It's going to be a long week." Johnny nodded.

"Yeah. It can get pretty boring, but Mary and me played games and stuff to pass the time. Didn't we?" Mary nodded weakly.

"Sure," she said softly. Gabby stared at her.

"Mary? May I ask you something?" Mary looked up.

"What?"

"Well…you know more about…well, you've been around them longer. How…" She looked at Johnny, and he realized he wasn't wanted for this conversation, so he got up and headed back to his compartment. Gabby moved to sit directly across from Mary. Mary shifted uncomfortably. "Your mother and my father…are they very close?" Mary looked at her, seeing a glimpse of the future for a moment. If her mother and Gabby's father courted long enough and eventually got married, that would make them…sisters? She wasn't certain if she liked that idea, though she liked Timothy well enough. "Mary?"

"Oh," Mary said quietly. "Yeah. I suppose they're…close." Gabby nodded.

"I like your mother. She's very nice."

"So is your father," Mary added. She looked down.

"I never had a chance to see my father…well, Timothy with my mother. Are you alright with it?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" Mary asked.

"Well, because I know you lost your father."

"I barely remember him," Mary replied quickly. "If my mother's happy, that's what's important." The girls sat in silence for a moment, before Gabby took a deep breath.

"Why don't you like me?" Mary looked up quickly.

"What?"

"You don't like me very much, do you?"

"That's not true," Mary replied, straightening in her seat. Gabby eyed her.

"Are you sure about that?"

"Sure I am," Mary shrugged. "I'm going to go rest now. I'm very tired." She stood up, but before she moved to leave, Gabby stood up.

"You're mad about Johnny, aren't you?" Mary looked up at her. "He's your best friend."

"He was."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," Mary replied, shaking her head. Gabby sighed heavily.

"I want to be your friend, Mary. I think we could be friends. Johnny's your best friend, and I don't want to change that."

"I think you already have," Mary replied, turning toward the window. Gabby frowned, and Mary flushed, feeling suddenly selfish.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I just…he's so nice, and I wanted to be polite."

"That's alright. It's not your fault. He's just a boy." Gabby smiled a little.

"But he's your friend. We can all be friends, can't we? There's no rules saying three people can't be friends, right?" Mary turned, smiling a little.

"I suppose not," Mary offered. "Sorry if you thought I didn't like you. I just…"

"It's alright," Gabby assured her. She smiled and held out a hand. "Friends?" Slowly, Mary reached out and shook the girl's hand.

"Friends."

April 7th 1871 – Colorado Springs

"Good girl," Carrie said with a smile, brushing down her horse in the stables after a long afternoon at the mercantile. Tommy had taken over, insisting that she get out for a while, and she was secretly grateful for the way her father had become so overprotective of her. What she knew he wouldn't appreciate was the fact that she was about to get out and take her horse for a long, strenuous ride, because she hadn't done that in ages.

"Goin' somewhere?" Carrie turned abruptly, seeing Daniel standing in the doorway of the stables, leaning against a post. She smiled at him with mischief in her eyes.

"Maybe," she said nonchalantly. "You're not here to keep a watchful eye on me, are ya?"

"Wouldn't dream of it," Daniel teased with a grin.

"Good. I'm about to take a ride. You want to join me…that is if you're not playin' detective for my pa?" Daniel considered her offer for a moment, and he finally nodded.

"Yep, but you're gonna have to keep up." Carrie rolled her eyes.

"Oh, I'm sure I can manage." Carrie grinned, as Daniel carried over her saddle and started helping her fasten it to the horse's back. "I can manage that too. You worry about your own saddle, 'cause as fast as we're gonna ride, I don't think ya wanna take the chance of fallin' off." The playful look in her eyes was a welcome change from the desolate, lost look that had overcome her for so long. He was happy to see her feeling so much better, and he was beginning to think that the time was almost right… "Daniel?" He broke free from his thoughts to see her already up on her horse and ready to go. "Hurry up! I don't have all day." She made a teasing face at him before clicking her tongue and urging her horse out of the stables.

Daniel rushed to saddle his own horse safely, and within minutes, he was meeting Carrie at the bridge. She smiled at him, gaining her balance, as her feet settled comfortably in the stirrups.

"Ready?" she asked. He smiled, tipping his hat to shield his eyes from the sun.

"More than ready," he replied, nudging his horse and rushing ahead in an early lead. Carrie stared after him for a moment, grinning, before she started her horse in a gallop, hoping to take Daniel's lead.

After twenty minutes, Carrie had a good quarter-mile lead on Daniel, and he was silently relieved when she stopped to let her horse drink water at Snow Creek.

Carrie smiled to herself, as she saw Daniel rushing to catch up. She settled down in a soft patch of grass, leaning back against a tree to catch her breath. She closed her eyes, as the sun filtered down through the leaves. It was amazing how green and full they'd become. Everything was so beautiful compared to the dreary, dead winter that had stripped the trees of their leaves and the grass of its color.

"Took ya long enough," Carrie grinned, as Daniel sauntered over after tying his horse to a low branch so he could drink and graze alongside Carrie's horse. He only gave her a disapproving but teasing cluck of his tongue.

"Ya cheated. That's why."

"I did not," she laughed. "Sore loser." Daniel smiled, and he settled down beside her in the grass. She could feel his eyes on her, and she tried to hide her embarrassment by pulling her legs up closer to her chest and wrapping her arms around her knees. He smiled, glad that she didn't pretend to be something she wasn't for him. He'd always known her as she was, and he didn't ever want her to change.

"I'm glad you're feelin' better," Daniel said quietly. "I ain't seen ya like this in a while." Carrie smiled and nodded.

"I guess I don't have anything else to worry about. I mean…I got my regrets. Plenty of 'em. I regret not havin' more time with my ma, but nobody can change that. I regret lettin' Jake Slicker get to me. But I don't have to worry 'bout that anymore, 'cause he's dead. I know it's bad of me to say, but I'm glad." He reached over, putting his hand over hers.

"So am I." She looked down, seeing his hand on hers, and those familiar feelings began to surface again. Her natural instinct was to pull away. Men weren't like this with her. They were rough and degrading. But she knew Daniel was different. She could let him in, and he wouldn't hurt her. "He ain't gonna hurt you no more. He ain't gonna cause no more trouble."

"Colorado Springs gets new people everyday. One of these days, somebody else might come along that'll fill those shoes," she said quietly.

"Why ya gotta think like that?" Carrie shrugged.

"I guess I've just learned not to get my hopes up," she replied. Daniel watched her, seeing how the sun filtering through the trees was casting shadows upon her tanned skin. She eyed him. "What're you lookin' at?"

"You," he said quietly. She shook her head.

"I don't know why," she laughed. "After all I put you through."

"You haven't put me through anything I couldn't survive. I almost lost you though, and I don't think I coulda survived if ya hadn't made it." Carrie turned toward him.

"What do you see in me, Daniel Simon?" she asked quietly, as her dark hair fell down her shoulders and framed her face, casting dark shadows there. He reached out, and she didn't pull away when his hand gently caressed her cheek.

"I see the prettiest girl I ever knew. I know you're young, and I know ya been through a lot, but I love you, Carrie." Carrie trembled under his touch, and she sighed softly.

"You know I love you too, right?" she asked, her eyes reflecting his emotions. Daniel nodded.

"I was hopin' ya still did," he teased. "It's been a while since we had time for just the two of us." Carrie nodded.

"I know. I guess I'm just settlin' after everything that's happened." Daniel nodded.

"Yeah. I…I've been waitin' for that. I've been wonderin' when the time would be right," he said quietly. Carrie's expression turned quizzical, as he leaned in, gently brushing his lips across hers. She smiled a little, as her flesh warmed at his touch. When he pulled back, she opened her eyes, feeling a smile creep across her face. She saw the nervous look appear in his eyes again, and she shook her head, gently touching his rough cheek with her fingertips.

"I've kept ya waitin' for a long time," she said quietly. "I'm sorry, Daniel. I really…needed this time."

"I know. I didn't wanna rush ya. You're still young…ya got lots of time…"

"I do," she said with a nod. "But Daniel, I don't want to spend the rest of my life feelin' sorry for myself and wishin' things were better. Not when I could make 'em better now. We could." Daniel's eyes lit up, and he leaned in, pulling her against him this time, as this kiss became more intense. Carrie's arms wrapped around him, pulling him closer, and they sat there holding one another close, listening to nothing but the sound of the creek trickling past and the horses snorting at one another from time to time.

As they tumbled back against the three, Carrie's hand brushed over Daniel's pocket, and she paused, pulling away from the kiss. She reached into his pocket, pulling out the small black box, and when Daniel realized what she'd found, he sighed heavily.

"I've been carryin' that around since before the Sweetheart's Dance. I guess I just never figured it was the right time…" Carrie's eyes were transfixed on the box, and she smiled.

"I knew you had it," she whispered. Daniel's eyes widened, as she looked back up at him.

"Ya did?"

"I found it that night…the night of the dance. I didn't say anything 'cause I was worried of what to say…how I really felt. So I figured you'd ask me when ya got the chance, but I gotta say…I'm glad ya didn't." Daniel's smile fell.

"You are?" She nodded.

"You've been there for me through it all, Daniel, even when I didn't want any help. You were there, and now I realize that it's just what I needed. I know what I want now." Daniel felt hope re-enter his heart.

"You do?" With a nod, she smiled, leaning in to brush her lips across his. When they parted, he looked at the ring box she still held in her hand.

"Well, do ya think maybe I could…risk askin' ya a question?" Carrie grinned, and she nodded, waiting for him to pop the question. She'd never felt like this before, but it was a good feeling. She didn't have to put up that defense barrier with him. He knew her better than that and would be able to see right through it. Besides, even if she were to shut him out, he'd probably never give up on her. Not anymore. Not after all they had been through.

"I think that might be a good idea," she replied. So, Daniel took the box back into his hand, and he opened it up, turning it to face her. She gasped at the beautiful ring that awaited her. On the cattle drives, a man would kill someone in their sleep for something this expensive. Luckily for her, she wasn't going on a drive anytime soon.

"Carrie James," he said quietly, his eyes looking into hers, as a grin brightened her face. "Would you be my wife?" Carrie nodded her head, as he took her hand in his.

"I will. So long as you don't expect me to be prissy, proper, or meek." Daniel laughed and shook his head.

"Nobody could ever make ya be those things. I love ya just the way you are." He slipped the ring on her finger, and she grinned, wrapping her arms around him, surprising him with a kiss.

"Good, 'cause I don't think we'd get too far otherwise." They both laughed together, but when the laughter stopped, they spent the rest of the afternoon in each other's arms, dreaming of the future and praying that they could make it work.

April 7th 1871 – On a Train to Colorado Springs

Well after nightfall, Michaela sat in her compartment reading. She'd shut the door, giving herself some quiet, but she soon realized that she didn't need it, as the children were sleeping, and everyone else had decided to turn in as well. But, she kept it shut so the light wouldn't disturb anyone, and she flipped through the pages of her mother's journal.

She dabbed tears from her eyes, as she sat holding the book. Her mother's past was shocking, but she'd had time to adjust to the blow before reading it. She had had an advantage, but still, reading what her parents had gone through was heartbreaking, and she felt a painful longing to know the brother who'd died before she was born.

Her eyes were growing tired, so she put the book aside and turned off her lamplight. She lay down in her bunk and let the rocking of the train car ease her. She was grateful it hadn't been a bumpy ride so far, and she hoped the rest of the journey would be just as smooth.

She placed her hand on her tummy, feeling how the skin had stretched a little to accommodate the growing baby inside of her. She couldn't wait to feel the first kick, but she figured that was still several weeks away. September seemed so far away, but she knew the months would fly by in no time. In just a month, she would be married to the most wonderful man she'd ever met, and they would be anxiously preparing for the birth of their first child. She only hoped the citizens of Colorado Springs could once and for all accept the fact that she was going to do things her way and not give in to the pressures of her peers.

Feeling a twinge in her back caused Michaela to grimace, and she sat up, placing her hands on her back, massaging the tender area through the fabric of her gown. She rolled her head back tiredly, as her fingers delicately moved over the sore spot, and a few minutes later, she felt sleep beginning to take over. As she lay back down, she started to drift off, but another twinge in her back caused her to shift uncomfortably.

Meanwhile, in his compartment, Sully couldn't sleep. He had shifted several times in the bottom bunk, but he hadn't heard a sound or a movement from up above, where Johnny slept in the top bunk. He figured the boy had fallen asleep at least an hour ago, and knowing his son, he was probably in a deep sleep.

He turned onto his side, trying to calm his own restlessness, but as he closed his eyes, the gentle rocking of the train car seemed even too much for his agitated state. A heavy feeling in his chest was also bothering him, but after a while, he realized that he was lonely. He missed Michaela, even though she was just across the small aisle of the train car. She was probably sleeping like a rock, and he hoped she was just so she and the baby could get some rest. At the same time, however, having someone to talk him through his insomnia wouldn't be so terrible.

He hadn't had this much trouble sleeping since all of his nightmares. He'd been terrified to sleep for fear of his past of visions of an uncertain future filling his thoughts. But it hadn't been like that in so long. Why all of a sudden was he having so much trouble sleeping?

Finally, the uncomfortable bunk was becoming too much for him, so he stood up and checked to make sure Johnny was sleeping. When he was certain of that, he crept out of the compartment, shutting the door behind him. He slowly rapped on Michaela's door, and when he didn't hear a reaction at first, he started to turn back. But when he heard the door jostle and slide open, he turned back to meet her questioning gaze.

"Sully," she said with a sleepy smile.

"I'm sorry if I woke ya."

"You didn't," she assured him. "I'm having trouble sleeping."

"Me too," he replied, shifting awkwardly, finding it hard not to let his eyes roam over her body. He knew that if he did that, he wouldn't be able to sleep at all for a week, because thoughts of her being so close would fill his mind and his heart, and then their deal would get in the way.

"Oh," Michaela winced, putting her hand on her back and leaning into it a little. Sully stepped toward her in the darkness, alarm beginning to tinge his features.

"You ok?"

"Yes. I'm alright," she said with a positive nod. "My back is just a little sore." She smiled at the look in his eyes. "Don't worry. It happens to most pregnant women at some point." She stood on her bare feet, shifting her wait from toe to heel quite frequently, wanting badly to ask him in but knowing better.

"Maybe I can help?" he offered. Michaela's eyes widened.

"I'm sure you could, but do you really think that's a good idea, Sully? I mean…we agreed…"

"Michaela, it's just a back rub," Sully said with a grin. "'Sides, I know exactly what we agreed to, and that's exactly the plan we're stickin' to." She raised an eyebrow and nodded her head.

"As long as you remember the rules, Mr. Sully." He heard an almost playful note in her voice that drove him mad.

"You think I can't control myself?" he teased, as he followed her into the compartment and slid the door shut. "I think it's somebody else that…"

"I would think twice before you accuse me," she laughed. "I am the mother of your child, after all." Sully smiled, and he sat down on her bunk, scooting back so his back touched the wall, and spreading his legs. He patted the bed between his legs, and Michaela eyed him as she lit the oil lamp again, letting light fill the compartment. Finally, she settled between his legs, leaving enough room for him to work, and she closed her eyes, as his hands started at her shoulders first.

Sully smiled, as he watched her lean forward, completely relaxing at his touch, and he began to massage her shoulders and arms before finally moving to her back. She moaned softly, as his touch caused the tension in her back to ease up, and she began to feel those familiar longings bubbling up inside of her.

"Feelin' any better?" Sully asked after a few moments, making sure to gently trace his fingers along her spine, as he inched his way back up.

"Much," she moaned, her voice low and full of need. She swallowed hard, knowing he was trying to weaken her resolve, and she tried to think of a way to pay him back. So, she placed her hands on his knees, and she began to rub her hands along his thighs, causing him to suck in a deep breath in order to try to keep himself composed.

Michaela smiled, when she felt his touches beginning to grow a little more impatient, and she leaned into him. He could smell her perfume, and it was intoxicating him, and as his hands moved down her shoulders, she could feel her skin prickling with goose bumps. He knew he had to get out of there soon or their deal would be broken.

"Ah, Michaela," he finally managed to say. "I think I ought to get back to…" She smiled, and she turned in his arms to kiss him softly, her chest brushing against his and causing him to squirm. If he held her, he wouldn't want to let go, so he gently pushed back on her shoulders. He saw the gleam in her eyes, and he shook his head.

When she moved off of him, he stood and turned toward her, taking her hand in his.

"See ya in the mornin'," he said with a smile.

"Goodnight," she said, barely containing a giggle, as he inched closer to the door, reaching for it, as if he was about to escape from the hunt of a predator.

"'Night." He left quickly, and she shut the door, feeling silly and proud of herself at the same time. Several months ago, she never would have dreamed of already knowing Sully body and soul, but as time changed, so did she, and she was only grateful that she had been given the chance to love him with everything she had. There was still so much time ahead of them, and she was certain it would only get better. In time, they would be married and have their family, and nothing would stand in their way of happiness.

Turning down the light, Michaela smiled to herself as she lay back in the bunk, still feeling his body heat on the places he'd been sitting. She curled up on her side with one hand on her belly, and the rambling sound of the train carrying her closer to home lulled her to sleep.

Author's Note: I've noticed very little feedback here as of late. If anybody is still reading this on please leave me a note once in a while! Feedback is greatly appreciated and needed! Thank you.