Author's Note: I am so terribly sorry that I didn't update for the past while! Writer's block combined with schoolwork can be a very, very despairing thing.
"I love her." Kirigiri had said, wiping her eyes with her arm. "I love everything about her. The way she talks, the way she smiles, the way she hugs me. I love her with my entire being. I want to remain by her side even if it hurts."
Big. Fancy. Clean. Elegant. Many words can be described when one steps foot into the Togami family's home. Togami had guided his friends inside, which was organized, and neatly decorated with fancy aesthetics. The mansion was filled with other people. People from business, and others of wealth. Togami's friends had a separate section of the mansion all for themselves. The presents that everyone carried were piled under and around the Christmas tree that glittered and glimmered of flashy lights and decorations. They were set free after, allowing to merge with the other guests.
It was an honor to even step in the place, let alone be part of a celebration within it. Celestia had herself seated, a small glass cup in her delicate hands. Her scarlet eyes roamed the place. Businessmen laughed and shook hands, women of wealth chattered away, and then there were her classmates spread out, enjoying beauty of the area. Hearing someone sit next to her, she averted her eyes to see who it was. "How are you enjoying the party Celestia?" the person had asked.
"I enjoy it very much. Thank you for asking Kyouko." The gambler answered, taking a sip from her drink.
Kirigiri let out a quiet chuckle. The lilac girl had shifted closer towards Celestia. Celestia knowing that the girl wanted some attention and private time, slid her hand onto the girl's lap, fingers gently dancing backwards and forwards on her thigh. The detective in response, reached her hand forward, to where Celestia quickly withdrew her hand, a devious grin plastered on her lips.
The lilac detective frowned. "You enjoy your little games of keep away don't you Celestia?"
"Oh but of course! All my little games I enjoy when it comes to you."
"Devious of you. Taunting me like this. If we were to be in private I would have you squirming under my grasp."
Celestia grinned, placing her cup on the table in front of her. "Perhaps Togami-kun has a room that you and I can stay in."
Kirigiri stared at Celestia before looking away, her face beginning to burn up. "Don't tempt me. I will go as far as talking to Togami-kun about this."
With one finger, Celestia gently yanked down Kirigiri's shirt collar low enough to expose her neck and a bit of her shoulder. Lilac eyes immediately pinned onto the lolita, Kirigiri remained frozen in spot. Lips and tongue trailed down the flesh revealed, agonizingly slow. A small victorious giggle escaped Celestia's lips as she felt Kirigiri's body shudder from the sensation. "Your games are getting a lot more dangerous." Kirigiri answered, her breathing hitching from the touches Celestia continued to give her.
"You're boring Kyouko." Celestia whispered, her hand dangerously trailing along Kirigiri's thighs, closer and closer, "Awfully boring. Will you play a game with me?"
"A game of risk and danger. That I like. However, we are in public and due to that reason, I cannot accept."
Celestia pulled back her hands, understanding the situation. She nodded. "Perhaps after this celebration, we may spend some quality time together."
Kirigiri took her time to calm her racing heartbeat. "Perhaps. I enjoy spending time with you in general, Taeko. Even if it may escalate to such lewdness."
A giggle was heard. "And I, Taeko Yasuhiro feel the same way."
Celestia was called over by Sayaka. The gambler quickly excused herself and had told Kirigiri that she would be back very soon. She rushed over to the idol, gently bowing once to her in greeting. Kirigiri's lilac eyes watched as the two girls laughed and smiled at each other, conversing about how their holidays went so far and such.
Ba-dump!
Kirigiri's heart beated painfully. Just from the mere sight of the two together pained her. Dangerously so. She couldn't peel her eyes from them, and it hurt her. Why? Why did it hurt her? She asked to herself.
Ba-dump!
An hour had passed and Celestia had not come back. She was still with Sayaka somewhere on this floor. Kirigiri felt lonely, even though Naegi or even Togami had sat beside her. They talked of a few words or they drank some sweet drinks in silence. Togami remained by her side, simply because he didn't want to "deal with the crowd."
Ba-dump!
Her heart continued to hurt. It continued to scream. It even sent messages to her mind, fogging it up with the painful experiences she had with Celestia. The memory of Junko telling her that Celestia was cheating on her was there, as well as her vivid memory of seeing Celestia kiss Sayaka outside on the winter streets in the heart of the city.
Ba-dump!
Enough Kyouko. You can't hide this forever. You have to tell her, confront her about this. You are hurting the most. Kirigiri didn't want to listen to her mind. Her heart was already broken as it is, and no one else knew the pain she went through except for herself. As long as Taeko is happy, it doesn't matter what goes for me. She told herself. Her mind argued back, but she ignored it.
Ba-dump!
Togami had averted his blue eyes onto the detective. There was no coldness or intimidation, but it held slight pity, maybe sympathy even. "Kirigiri." He had said quietly. "Are you faring well?"
She looked at him and nodded. "I am fine. Thank you for asking. Why do you ask? It is rare of you to show concern."
Togami grunted. "You are someone I consider as a friend. You are someone I am fond of. However, from the looks of it, you are not doing so well. In fact, your tears show otherwise."
Ba-dump!
Kirigiri wasn't aware that she had shown tears. The tears that held every single bit of her sorrows and pain. She wasn't aware until she felt more of them run down her cheeks, and she bit on her lip, roughly so, to try forcing herself to hold back. She wasn't one to cry. She wasn't one to cry in most scenarios. She was always well composed, and knew how to solve things logically. Yet here she is, now a girl with a fogged up mind, filled with undying torment and her heart had finally won.
Togami took Kirigiri by the hand and lead her to one of the rooms he saved for his friends. He closed the door behind him and guided Kirigiri onto the couch. She sat down and the moment the heir placed a tissue box onto the table in front of her is when she couldn't hold back anymore.
"Do you want to go home?" he asked, cautious with his words.
Kirigiri shook her head. "I can't." she choked out, "I have to leave with Celestia because I gave her a ride here."
Togami sighed. "You and Celestia are quite a couple. You spoil each other sour. However, I will not pry into your business if you do not wish to speak of it. I am not so skilled in the arts of emotions and social events."
Ba-dump!
Kirigiri had spilled it out. She spilled her pains and sorrows to Togami, who listened closely. He didn't know what to say. He let the once composed detective cry onto him, gently patting her back, hoping it would help her calm down.
"Celestia Ludenberg is something different is she not? For her to succumb to such an act, I pity you, Kirigiri."
She didn't need pity. She didn't need sympathy either. What she needed was the solution to this problem. The problem she was unable to solve on her own.
"Perhaps you should confront her about it. Or perhaps confront Maizono. Both of you are victimized."
Kirigiri didn't want to confront anyone. She wasn't ready.
"Or…you can abandon Celestia. She is happy with Sayaka Maizono is she not? You have also stated that you are fine when Celestia is happy. You are hurting the most and you are not gaining anything. So why stay if you are hurt the most?"
"I love her." Kirigiri had said, wiping her eyes with her arm. "I love everything about her. The way she talks, the way she smiles, the way she hugs me. I love her with my entire being. I want to remain by her side even if it hurts."
"You want to stop this pain, yet you want to remain by her side? Human emotion is very complicated and I for one am glad that I do not have to deal with this. At least for now. I am not you, and you will decide on your own, however, pain is inevitable. Suffering, you can escape from. Choose your path, Kirigiri."
Ba-dump!
Togami had calmed the lilac girl down enough for her to stop crying. He left when he has asked if Kirigiri needed time alone, to which she had said yes. Closing the door behind him, it was as if the devil himself had thrown him in the eye of the storm. Sayaka Maizono was in front of him.
"Togami-kun? Are you ok? You look ill." Stated the idol, tilting her head to the side.
Togami frowned. "Something happened to Kirigiri. She's in the room I just left. So I advise you to stay away at the moment."
Sayaka frowned, and watched Togami leave without another word. It was best that she left Kirigiri alone, but Kirigiri was one of her dear friends. And friends help each other out right? She opened the door quietly to find Kirigiri laying down on the couch, her body facing the soft, leather material. She walked in and closed the door behind her before voicing herself out. "K-Kirigiri-san?"
Kirigiri's body tensed up from Sayaka's voice, but she remained silent, unmoving. She heard the idol's footsteps come closer to where she even felt the girl sit at the edge of the couch, a gentle hand petting through her lilac locks. "Is there something you need me for?" Kirigiri asked coldly, tone seething with ice.
Sayaka frowned, her mind and heart slightly stinging from the other girl's coldness. "I'm worried for you Kirigiri-san. You're upset, and it's rare of you to see you upset."
Kirigiri didn't respond once again. The two sat in silence, as the sound of ticking became the only noise in the room. Sayaka looked at the clock and then back at Kirigiri. Her intuition was great and all, but she felt that she was at fault. "I'm sorry, Kirigiri-san."
"What for?" the detective answered, still facing the couch.
Sayaka's mind played the scenes of Celestia and Kirigiri together. She smiled bitterly. "For hurting you unintentionally."
Kirigiri's eyes widened and she sat up, head facing towards the blue-haired idol. Sayaka didn't look back, but she was well aware that Kirigiri had moved. "What do you mean, Maizono-san? You are innocent in this." Kirigiri had stated, and the truth no less.
"Don't pretend in front of me, please. I know very well, why you're like this. I know for the fact that we both feel the same pain."
Kirigiri sighed in defeat. "Why then? Why didn't you make a move yet?"
Sayaka forced out a chuckle. "Same reason you do. I love Celestia very, very much. Even though it hurts. I don't know who came first, but it didn't matter. Though, I promise you. I'll talk to her about it."
Ba-dump!
It wasn't that Kirigiri didn't trust Sayaka. In fact, she did. Much more than some of the other friends she had. Though she knew things will not go well. Sayaka must have read her mind, all because she knew what to say. "I know things will not go well." She had said, looking forward still. "I'll get nasty with her if necessary. In order to save us."
Ba-dump!
Sayaka and Kirigiri left the room together. They didn't say much, and Sayaka had kept her cheerful aura and composure around everyone else, while the detective on the other hand, kept calm and isolated herself from everyone.
Ba-dump!
Celestia had come back to Kirigiri, apologizing for her disappearance. Kirigiri shrugged it off. When Celestia gave her a quick kiss, her heart beated painfully once more. She kissed back, a habit of hers. Though it was painful, too cruel. The gambler had no idea, and she would never know so long as Kirigiri kept quiet.
Ba-dump!
It had been time where Togami had told everyone to gather in the room to open the gifts that they brought for each other. It filled everyone with great joy, as they spent last remaining couple of hours together before each and every one of them left.
Ba-dump!
Kirigiri's heart ached on the way back to her house. Her father had offered Celestia to stay over for the night if she desired for it. She accepted without question.
Ba-dump!
Jin had told Kirigiri that he would not disturb the both of them for the rest of the night. He understood very well on what could potentially happen and warned both of them that he did not want to hear any "mischievous" behavior while he finished his paper work.
Ba-dump!
The gambler and the detective ended up snuggling on the bed, in the dark. Celestia's scent and soft breathing made Kirigiri to hold onto her forever. Celestia had fallen asleep beside her, but Kirigiri remained awake. She felt her heart crack at a tremendous rate. Cracking too fast, too painfully. She was unable to hold back any longer.
Crack!
You can't do this forever. I told you so many times.
Crack!
Maizono-san isn't going to give up on Taeko so easily. After all, she loves her, and so does Taeko. Maybe you should follow Togami-kun's advice, and abandon her.
Crack!
Maybe Taeko used you to get to Maizono. Seems reasonable right?
Crack!
Maybe she never loved you. She is after all, the Queen of Lies.
Crack!
You are a fool. You are smarter than this. You knew this is exactly what happened the last time you fully trusted someone with your heart and your life.
Crack!
Kirigiri felt herself tear up, tears began pouring out as she silently sobbed, arms wrapped about Celestia, gently. She didn't want to wake her up. She didn't want her to see her this upset. She hasn't cried in ages, she hasn't felt this upset in ages either. It was a painful nightmare, a nightmare she told herself that she would fight through.
Her heart who sealed up with a fake coat of paint, cracked and peeled off, revealing a broken, cracked heart, who bleeds for recovery and relief.
Crack!
Celestia is the Queen of Lies. She's an expert at lying, with words, emotions or even actions themselves. She indeed had woken up from Kirigiri's crying, but she remained still, her breathing calm as ever. She knew Kirigiri well enough. She knew if she tried asking her what was wrong, the detective would avoid the subject, telling her that it was just something else in her life that had made her feel such a way. The other reason, Celestia knew Kirigiri was aware of her two-timing. An apology won't do justice. She hurt not only Kirigiri, but Sayaka as well. She even had hurt herself during this process, all because she was greedy, selfish, and wanted nothing else but to have the both of them all to herself.
Crack!
Kirigiri was someone quick to recover. She had stopped sobbing after ten minutes. The detective gently unraveled her arm from Celestia, got up to go to her bathroom. Celestia remained in spot, her fingers clawing at the bedsheets. "I'm sorry…Kyouko. I'm sorry…Maizono…both of you have the right to yell at me. Both of you have the right to hate me. I'm prepared. I'm prepared to receive my punishment." Celestia whispered to herself, before she curled up, closing her eyes once more.
She felt Kirigiri lay back down beside her. She felt Kirigiri's lips touch hers once more, her arm back around her, holding her close. It was the only comfort she got.
I'm sorry…Kyouko…