"It's a beautiful day, isn't it Kyouko? I miss these days…the days where we are by each other's side as if it were an eternity…" Celestia looked back up, a genuine smile was displayed. "These lilacs remind me of you…a wonderful picture of lilacs…you remind me of how you are my spring..."
Day and night it was an unending cycle for the twin-drilled girl. It was a hard blow to her heart confronting the royal blue-haired girl on her true feelings. The truth of it all. Love was a funny thing. Painful, yet oh so gentle and hope-filled. It gave the gambler a new set of eyes for the world. She never understood it, hearing all these relationships forming to shatter, she sneered at them endlessly, finding it foolish. Until it happened to her. Did Celestia regret that decision? Not one bit. In fact, she found the one thing enough to be of her efforts, embracing it fully without any remorse.
Stupid of her to be so greedy, wanting all the love as much as possible. She wasn't polyamorous. Rarely anyone she knew was of such. What she done was equal to a sin of sorts. She knew as such and merely gambled away her feelings and luck just to see if she could keep up her streak, to get what she wanted. Sadly, her luck failed her this time, at least in terms of emotional matters. She still retained her luck of gambling and used her free nights to earn some cash, relax a bit and have some fun at some casinos and underground areas. Though, all the money in the world would never win back what she lost. Kirigiri and Sayaka meant so much to her. Thankfully, her luck played in and she still had Sayaka in her life and that was enough. As for Kirigiri, she had hoped it didn't fail her now. She truly did love the detective with all her heart and soul and gaining back the girl's trust would be difficult.
Scarlet eyes stared at the screen of her phone. Kirigiri's name was what she had seen and she had went through some photos of the two together. How she missed the lilac-haired girl. Sighing, Celestia forced herself onto her back, blankly staring at her ceiling. For a Saturday, her day had been bland, dull even. Even her tea tasted dry and bitter. Funny how emotions altered many a thing.
Fingers tapped against the surface of her table, another sigh had escaped from her lips. The gambler knew it was a bad idea to stay cooped up inside her home when she was in a pained state, though all her actions had been harder to force out. For someone organized and tidy, she became a bit more messier. Her games of gambles needed her focus and she remained solemn unlike her playful attitude. Some of the old opponents she had fought made a comment on how dark and grim she was compared to the last time they've seen her.
A lovesick fool. That is what she was. Always thinking about Kirigiri, always bearing the guilt of toying with Sayaka. The despair had dragged her down with it. So much of it was around that Junko had held back her pranks as she had fed off of the twin-drilled girl's despair. The concerned looks from everyone didn't help either. Togami had even gave her a stern talking to, to where she shrugged it off. It was none of his concern, but it was greatly appreciated that she meant something to him. Then again, it was greatly appreciated that the large group of friends she had was appreciated by Togami.
Shaking out of her thoughts, Celestia quickly finished her daily dose of royal milk tea, washing the silverware before she forced herself out of her house. Perhaps a walk or two would do. It would do much to distract her. The twin-drilled girl didn't have a specific place she wanted to go to, but she decided that a walk near the gardens was nice. There was a public garden that was wonderful in this type of season and it always calmed her down whenever she bypassed it alongside with the rest of the wonderful flowers and trees outside of it.
It had been a long peaceful walk and the gambler had bypassed a few flowers. Roses were common, and so were cherry blossoms and lilies. Though, what grabbed her attention was the lilac trees around. How painful. Lilacs reminded the gambler of Kirigiri. In fact, the lilac detective was her delicate lilac flower.
A delicate hand reached forward to the lilac flowers, gently feeling the branches sway back and forth, brushing the palm of her hand. Scarlet eyes shimmered lightly, a small sense of desire could be seen if one were to glance into those red eyes of hers. "I miss you…Kyouko." Celestia whispered quietly, knowing it was pathetic of her to speak quietly to herself.
Turning back away from the lilac flowers, she decided to look around a bit before exiting of the place. Scarlet eyes were gazing downwards until she had bumped into a person. Quickly apologizing, Celestia looked up to find the one person she wanted to see, but not like this. Eyes widening, the gothic gambler could feel her blood freeze up from the sight. "K-Kyouko…" she spoke in a whisper, eyes never leaving the purple detective.
Faceted amethyst eyes could see the shock on the gambler's face. Kirigiri didn't expect to run into Celestia either. Normally on nice days she ventured to parks and gardens, admiring the serene gracefulness they gave. Spring was of her favorite season alongside with winter. The detective's heartbeat pounded painfully in her chest, but due to the time of separation, it was far more tolerable than before. "What brings you here?" she asked.
A shaky breath was taken before the scarlet-eyed girl spoke, a forced smile appearing on her lips to cover her shock alongside with the look of desire. "I am merely here to gaze upon the delicate flowers. The spring is lovely to offer such beautiful colors to spread in the city."
"…I see." Kirigiri answered, arms crossing lightly.
An awkward silence had appeared and Celestia averted her gaze away, knowing very well the sleuth in front of her was pondering. Pondering on what to say or do to be precise. Kirigiri's motives were foggy and mystery, and she knew better than to play a game and be invasive with her after what had happened between the two. Even then, the gambler lost her will of fooling around like she use to. The heartbreak was enough to hammer her into place, grounded herself onto firm land to use her mind in a much more serious manner.
Gritting her teeth behind her lips, Celestia knew very well she needed to take action if she wanted to break the ice with Kirigiri. Though, it was clear she was nervous when she asked of this request, expecting a rejection straight out. Who wouldn't if one became hurt and aware of the crimes she had done? "…Kyouko…would…you spend some time with me?"
Lavender met scarlet eyes. For a brief moment, Celestia could detect the sudden flash of desire and joy which was soon quickly clouded by reluctance. It was to be expected after all. Those scarlet eyes mimicked the desire, but there was love and honesty in those ruby-like eyes of hers. Perhaps even a look of sorrow and apology were added into that mix. Kirigiri wanted to go to the gardens for her own leisure and pleasure, but being asked to hang out with the gambler after so long, it was tempting, but she was also very, very cautious.
Out of the trio, Kirigiri had used her mind more than the other two, being the one to suggest that all of them stay away from each other for a while. A while didn't have a time limit that's for sure. Though it had been a month, almost two and that certainly gave the gambler enough time to think over everything, right? Yet, she was unpredictable and while she cut the string to their connection, the detective could assume the gambler went to the idol for comfort and love. After all, the lilac sleuth ignored all attempts of communication from Celestia. She needed time for herself as well as the belief that Sayaka made her happier than she did.
After what seemed to be of an eternity, Kirigiri nodded. "…I have time to spare. Being with you after a while seems to be refreshing. Shall we stroll to the gardens and streets together? I may treat you to dinner later tonight. That is, if you so wish for it."
Celestia couldn't believe it. After so long, she had expected Kirigiri to be out of her life entirely, but the acceptance of the request was enough to give the gambler some hope. Working from bottom up was what she did for eons. This would be no different. "That would be lovely, Kyouko…I…would like to spend more time with you…"
Kirigiri tensed up lightly. Such simply words, yet so powerful to her heart. It was clear she still loved the gambler even after the despair and pain she was put through. Nodding once again, the lilac detective stepped closer, hands almost touching. Walking with Celestia was pleasant, it made her happy, though again, she had to constantly remind herself to not be too enthralled and lost with this temporary joy. After all, they were no longer together in a sense.
A second trip to the gardens wasn't so bad. In fact, it made everything much more beautiful in Celestia's eyes seeing she was with Kirigiri in such an elegant place like this. Time had passed and it was at the peak of the day, all so bright and warm, a cool breeze greeting the both of them here and there. Looking over at their hands, the raven-haired girl wanted to be a little bold and hoping it was accepted, she gently entwined her fingers with Kirigiri's, feeling the warmth from her hand and glove in general.
Instinctively, Kirigiri had closed her light amethyst eyes for a brief moment, entwining her fingers back with Celestia's hand. The sleuth was a little flustered at this point as she allowed sight to be seen once again. She had forced her attention forward at the flowers. Lilies, roses, daisies… a lot of delicate, yet common flowers were here. Some cherry blossoms here around as well.
Lilac met lilac and Kirigiri couldn't help but stare at the lilac trees. The flowers were bright and blossoming, some of the petals had made their way to the ground. A hand gently reached forward, gently resting under a small branch which contained many flowers. Kirigiri knew. She definitely knew the symbolism of these flowers. Lilacs were common in purple, representing first love and sometimes protection. They were also the harbingers of spring, signaling whether spring was early or late.
It was an early spring this year which was pleasant for the detective. The silence between her and Celestia was most welcome. What was unexpected was that both of them seemed comfortable in the silence, as if each other's presence was enough to shake the awkwardness away. Words were spoken which made Kirigiri avert her gaze to the shorter girl who began cling onto her arm.
"It's a beautiful day, isn't it Kyouko? I miss these days…the days where we are by each other's side as if it were an eternity…" Celestia looked back up, a genuine smile was displayed. "These lilacs remind me of you…a wonderful picture of lilacs…you remind me of how you are my spring..."
Such sweet, heartfelt words. They had the power that made Kirigiri's breath hitch lightly ever so slightly. She had to admit that she too missed Celestia's presence. Her tender words, gestures and affections enough were enough to brighten up her days. If only none of this chaos had happened. It would have been peaceful. More peaceful at least. "…indeed it is." A whisper. "I too miss the days of the past, but it is best we do not linger on such things."
That hurt her more than it should. "Right…though…Kirigiri-san…"
Kirigiri froze at the mention of her family name. It had been far too long. She grew too accustomed to being addressed with her first name while being alone with the gambler. Not speaking, her actions said enough that she was indeed listening. Eyes fixated themselves onto Celestia, the medium-toned purple hue of her eyes bearing a small curiosity.
"…would…you ever give me a second chance?" Celestia asked, her eyes still staring at the lilacs that followed the gentle spring breeze. "I know I have shattered the trust you have for me…but I need to know…"
The grip on Kirigiri's hand was tightened, as if Celestia didn't want to let go. Like it was the last time they would ever be this close again. Looking at the hands, she had expected herself to pull away from the grasp or loosen up, but instead she tightened her grip as well onto the gambler which earned her a small squeak of surprise. "…perhaps." Is what the lilac sleuth had said, feeling the cool breeze hit her lightly. "It is true…you did shatter the trust I had for you. Eons ago. Yet, it does not take away one thing. The fact that I still love you exists. Even the wounds inflicted upon me, I truly do still give my heart to you."
To love and be loved is a blessing wasn't it? Celestia couldn't help but bring her free hand to her mouth, teeth slightly sinking into her finger to prevent herself from breaking down entirely. She had to keep herself composed. Despite being shattered for over a month, she couldn't ruin this now. No tears, no squeals or laughs. She had to be as calm to keep herself thinking. Unfortunately for her, Kirigiri had caught onto the act, but didn't say anything. It was hard for the gambler to not tear up and she did, just slightly. Days and even weeks of bottling all these pent up emotions, this was the only respite she'd ever get. At least for now.
Sighing, the lilac girl gently pulled the other into a tight hug, letting go of her hand once Celestia first loosened up. Kirigiri wasn't the one to be this bold with her actions, but she too had suffered building up these pent up emotions. So much that she didn't realize how much she missed the other. Thankfully barely anyone was around, let alone barely anyone paid attention to them. Both gambler and detective loathed being the center of attention.
The lolita had pulled her hand away from her mouth, more tears were building up in those scarlet eyes of hers. Returning the embrace, Celestia dug her fingers into Kirigiri, nuzzling her face against the purple leather jacket. She could feel the few tears slide down her face. The taller lilac girl had her face buried into the gambler's neck, lavender eyes closed as she could feel the warmth from the other, alongside breathe in the pleasant scent.
"I'm…sorry…I'm so sorry Kyouko…you don't deserve me after what I've done…I...I don't deserve anyone…" choking out her words, Celestia dug her fingers deeper into the purple fabric, hiding her pained expression away from the lilac girl's eyes.
She didn't expect to cry. Not right now. After building herself up by force, she felt weak and pathetic for letting herself break down in front of the one girl she loved the most. This wasn't Celestia Ludenberg at all. No. She came to realize now that this was Taeko Yasuhiro speaking to the detective. A girl whose heart had been bleeding for ages, striving and hurting for the better. Her fake identity was a cover up, a shield of her own. Like armor for a knight. Without it, she's far too fragile despite being able to retaliate. She had trusted that Kirigiri wouldn't break her down like before. She wasn't ready for some sheer agony for another long amount of time even though she was well aware she deserved this as a punishment. Her being hated by Kirigiri would be enough, but the detective was far too kind despite how cold and stoic she was at times.
All Kirigiri could do was gently rub up and down Celestia's back, planting small kisses on her neck and cheek. Affectionate. That's what she was being, but it was well out of care and honest true love. She didn't know what to say, but she had forgiven the gambler long ago. What had happened had happened. It didn't make her a monster at all, despite how much of degrading she did onto herself. It was understandable why Celestia became the way she was. After all of the explosion of feelings and two-timing, the gambler's confidence and ego in general would collapse. It bit her back in the most malicious way possible.
She believed after the month or two of struggle, Celestia finally deserved some respite and forgiveness. No one deserved to suffer for eternity for something like that. At least the gambler didn't use one person to get to another or lie about her feelings. Kirigiri allowed the other to open up and cry on her. It wasn't the first time she had endured this. Gently stroking the girl's back she continued to protect the gambler from the world for this very moment. "I forgive you."
Celestia wasn't one to sob unless it had impacted her heavily and that she was in private. A few sniffles could be heard as she continued to silently cry in small amounts onto the lilac detective. Were they together again? She didn't even know. She was far too overwhelmed with guilt, despair and joy all in one. Being forgiven was as if the burden from her chest lifted and once she was ready she forced herself to look up, smiling happily at the other.
Smiling back, Kirigiri gently wiped the remaining tears from those delicate ruby eyes she loved so dearly. "…tears do not suit someone as beautiful as you, Taeko. Please do not weep. I forgive you." She repeated the three words from before. "To answer my own hesitation…I believe it is fair that I give you a second chance…though, my trust for you seems to stagger."
"That is fair enough Kyouko. More than enough…I promise you…I shall redeem my worth for you. I have decided who I truly want to be with." Replying, Celestia leaned forward as if to aim to steal a kiss from the other.
She froze, staring into lavender before she forced her back down and away. "…it's…you that I love dearly…Maizono-san has a place in my heart, but…she deserves someone who will not pull off such despair onto her…" a bitter smile, Celestia averted her scarlet eyes away. "…I need you Kyouko. I want you. Only you…it took me so long to figure out the truth and core of my heart…you are my spring, you are the lilacs in my spring…you are everything to me Kyouko Kirigiri…and if I have to endure the flames of hell forwards and backwards to show to you how much you mean to me…then so be it."
Grabbing onto a gloved hand, the gothic girl held it in both her hands while she looked back, face to face with Kirigiri. "I promise you this…if I no longer make you happy…I will allow you to be on your way to find your happiness…I will not hold you back, even if it wounds me so. My delicate lilac…I want to be with you…I want to be by your side as long as it will last."
Eyes widening, lavender eyes stared, shocked as the gambler continued to poor her heart out. Kirigiri's heart constricted in her chest, it was a little difficult for her to breathe at this moment. It wasn't bad of course, she was possibly the happiest girl at this moment. Smiling, the sleuth gently ruffled the gambler's hair with her other hand, laughing softly. "And I, Kyouko Kirigiri feel the same, Taeko Yasuhiro. We shall see where this ends, shall we? Whether for the better or for the worse."
Before Celestia could respond, she felt soft lips upon hers to where her breath hitched lightly before she whimpered lightly from the gesture to soon reciprocate it quickly before it was broken. The gambler giggled lightly. "Of course…"
It was a shaky foundation that they both stepped on, but the gambler believed it was wise that they continue their little walk together. Celestia finally received her respite, but unfortunately she had to work her way back up. Though, to her, it was well worth it.
Kirigiri sighed lightly as she held hands with the other, continuing their walk as the sun still glared upon the two. She knew what she was getting herself into, but unfortunately, she still kept herself composed besides a few reactions to give the other some peace. The lilac girl didn't want to be this cautious and guarded, but she couldn't help it. Though, hopefully she didn't ruin their relationship this time. That would be bad, wouldn't it?
Author's Note: I apologize for the delay of these chapters. Writer's block alongside with laziness does too many things. I've also been too busy on my roleplaying blog on tumblr. Though I should be able to get these last few chapters published before November!