So, I'm back. Another chapter. I refused to let myself pick this apart. If I had, it may not have been posted ever. Working to find yourself again is a long road. A lot of stress mixed with indecisiveness and the loss of self worth makes this a difficult process.

I'm sure none of that up there matters - I could have said more, but I am sure I said too is no beta, just a team of wonderful ladies that I hold near and dear to me that give me suggestions on what I write. They all didn't have the time to get back to me yet(seeing as I emailed them the chapter maybe 2 hours ago), so all errors are my own.

Nonetheless, enjoy.

Only God Can Judge Me

As the band made their way off stage, I closed my tab with the bartender. I didn't realize I had drunk as much as I had. Guess I did tell him to keep them coming, and he wanted to make sure I drank as much as possible.

Alice went to the side of the stage, waiting for Jasper to come off. She was about to find her way in the back of a dingy van if I didn't stop her. I stumbled my way over to the stage. I hadn't felt the effects of the alcohol until the music stopped. Twelve beers in my belly in under ninety minutes may not have been that good of an idea. Sadly, I couldn't recall what I ate for dinner, if I even did eat. I had been too involved in studying.

"Lice, let's go," I stuttered as my knees hit the stage.

"Bella, give me a minute."

"Don't have time for that. Let's go."

I turned and plopped my ass on the stage, regretting this entire evening. This was the type of shit that got me in trouble. I stayed away from these types of situations since leaving high school.

I knew if I stayed here much longer, I would end up back in the same type of trouble I used to always get in. I knew the feeling I was feeling. I knew this was going to end badly.

"Told you I would see you again," the singer said, jumping off the stage.

"Yup, that you did." I tried to look up at him, but the room swayed a bit at the head movement. I did manage to see he had a few tats I hadn't seen before when he was on stage, and damn were they amazing.

"You feeling okay, LP?"

"Yup. Lice, let's go." Shit how I wanted a nap. I hadn't drunk that much in years. I now knew better. Or at least I thought I did.

I placed my elbows on my knees and leaned my head into my hands. I needed to go home. Now.

EPOV

"Guys, why are we playing here?" I asked, mildly annoyed. We had just arrived at the venue and it was a freaking pop club. We were a rock band. What the shit!

"Because they're a paying gig, and right now, we are broke as fuck," Carlisle replied. He was the level headed one. The one that made sure we didn't get too fucked up before we got our name out there. He was also our keyboard player, and a damn good one at that.

"Do you really think these people want to listen to anything we have to play?" Emmett asked. "Paying or not, we will probably bore the hell out of the people in here."

"Not our problem," Jasper said. "At least they are letting us drink on the house."

"True that," the other three of us said in unison.

I pulled a cigarette out of my pack and placed it to my lips. I flicked my lighter and stared at the flame for a moment before lighting the smoke. I took a few puffs and looked around the crowd. This really was not our normal type of gig. We stuck to small venues that were cheap where we could sell tickets. This gig, we were getting paid up front for playing, no matter how many people showed up at the club.

That was good; I needed money.

As my eyes looked around the club, they landed on a brunette not dressed like the other club goers. She looked like someone we would see at one of our shows. Donned in a Linkin Park tee and a pair of jeans, she didn't fit in with the rest of the people here. Something about her pulled my attention in, and completely distracted me. Maybe she was here for us.

The guys were all drinking, and I told them I was going to socialize for a few. As they all told me it was a bad idea, I walked out from the back room, needing to meet this girl.

I carried my Corona, wondering if I should actually drink it before going on stage. More or less, I carried it for appearance's sake. I hated being messed up on any level before going on stage. My eyes followed the girl as she tried to get to the bar, struggling along the way.

Thankfully, the stool next to where she sat was open, so I took it as mine. Hoping she was a fan and would recognize me, I tried to engage her. I tried to talk to her. I tried to get to know her, because I had to. Yet, at each attempt, she rejected me. She clearly wasn't here for the band, which made me wonder why she was here, since she looked nothing like the rest of the club goers.

As I sang on stage, I looked for her. People had crowded around the bar area, and I couldn't really see her anymore. I wanted to make sure I didn't lose her before I was able to get back to her again.

OGCJM

"Wakie, wakie, sunshine."

She rubbed her eyes and attempted to bury her face in the pillow.

"Go away, Lice."

"I don't know who this Lice is you speak of, but I'm Edward."

She jumped up, eyes searching around the room, looking anywhere but at me. Her hands felt her body, probably to see if she was dressed. Which she was. I wasn't a complete douche bag.

"Why are you here? What happened?"

"Well, uh, you passed out at the club. Your friend couldn't move you, so I helped. I didn't want to leave in case something was seriously wrong, so I stayed the night." I tried to look innocent. In all honesty, I wished she had woke on her own. This was mildly awkward, and I had shit to do today. I wanted to do things with her, but I knew that wouldn't happen on my current time restraint.

"What?" She moved her mouth and tongue like she had cotton mouth. Lucky for her, I thought of that. A night of drinking can be a bitch.

I handed her a glass of water and two Tylenol.

"I slept on the couch. Your friend said it was okay. But, I have to go, I only wanted to check on you before I left." I wanted her to know I had been here. If only so I could see her again.

"What, what time is it?" she asked. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut.

"Almost noon. I would have left you keep sleeping, but like I said, wanted to check on you before I left."

"It's noon?"

"Almost."

"And it is Thursday?"

"Last time I checked."

"Fuck!" she screamed. She placed her hands to her head. "I, I have to go."

She hopped out of bed, stumbling a bit, as she searched her room. The whole time she ran in circles, she was muttering to herself about being late, and being fucking stupid, and how she was going to kill Lice.

She pulled a beany on her head, covering her severe case of bed head, and ran out of the room, pulling her Chucks on as she ran.

"Lice, you bitch. If you're here, you fucking owe me," she screamed, before I heard a door slam. I plopped myself onto her bed wondering what exactly just happened. And why, I as a stranger to her was left here alone. Granted, I had been here alone with the sleeping beauty for hours. This technically was no different.

Remembering that I really had somewhere I needed to be other than a girl's bed alone, I hopped up and looked for a pad of paper and a pen. I didn't have her name and I wanted to have a way to see her again. Yeah, I knew where she lived and I could always stop by again, but I didn't want to be a stalker. And I didn't want to look desperate. Edward Masen was not a desperate man.

In the corner of her room sat a desk, covered in school books. Most were biology and anatomy books. She clearly was a smart girl, smarter than most I had ever been interested in before. I flipped through a notebook, amazed at the work she had inside of it. Worried for a moment this would look like an invasion of privacy if someone walked in, I flipped to the end of the book and was able to find a blank page. I tore it out and wrote my name and number on it. On the bottom, I wrote 'call me'.

I tapped the pen against my lips, unsure if I should write anything more. Seeing as she was the drunk chick that passed out at a bar, she probably wouldn't call. Who wanted to relive that type of nightmare? I know I wouldn't, but she was hot and had a nice body from what I could tell. She was sure to be fun in the sack. Plus, she knew anatomy. I was sure she knew all the right parts to make sex amazing.

I threw the note to her bed, writing nothing more, before grabbing my things. I took a look around her room and the living room one more time. These girls clearly had better things to do than be to be band groupies. They were amazingly well off compared to me and any of my friends. Pictures of the roommate lined some of the shelves. She seemed to always have a drink in her hand, but at the same time, there were some bigger names on her arm. She was one of those people who knew people, which was clear off her array of photos. I wondered for a moment if she lived off that – her friend base and nothing more. She definitely had better connections than I did.

I had to search a bit before I came across pictures of my sleeping beauty. School functions and day life were all I saw of her. By peeking into her personal life, it was clear my assumption of her last night had been correct – she was not a typical club goer.

With one last glance, I closed the door, leaving her apartment.

Once outside, I pulled my hoodie over my head and my pack of smokes from my pocket. I lit the cigarette and started the walk back to my car. Since I didn't live in the building, I had to park down the block. The joys of the city.

Driving back to my dingy ass apartment, my phone rang.

"Sup, Jazz?" I was sure he was going to give me shit for being late to rehearsal.

"Dude, that chick last night. She slid out before I got her info. Please tell me you got the hook up off her drunk friend."

"Sorry, dude. I didn't get shit. The one I was after, I hung out all night in hopes she would wake and find me suave and shit, but she bolted out of her house, leaving me there without a care."

"Shit. Maybe I am better off. They both could be crazy bitches."

"Yeah, maybe." I doubted it. "Be there in a bit."

"Peace, dude."

I pulled up to my apartment, but before I got out of my car, I saw the landlord at my door.

Shit, it was the sixth! Rent was officially late.

I smashed the palms of my hands into my eyes. Guess I wasn't going home until later.

I pulled another smoke out of my pack and lit it as I drove away.