I promise this is leading to a longer update! But I wanted to get something out here to show that I am really back to writing. Once again I apologize for the lengthy hiatus. I will NOT let it happen again. I plan to update at least once a week (probably more, but I make no promises for more than that).
If you know it I don't own it. And the forewarning for future chapters, which I feel should be a given, it's 50 Shades of Grey so sex talk and description should not be offensive to any one. If you're offended by it, please stop reading now. The rest of you ENJOY!
A seven mile run followed an uneventful day at the office. It was an attempt to clear my head, but it failed miserably, only allowing me more time to think about the spur of the moment decision I had made. Lynsey was attractive, there was no denying that. Her looks were what got me in trouble to begin with. A couple lengthy stares when I was at my mother's office, a few drinks after work and it just snowballed from there. She was so sweet and kind in the beginning. After dinner one night I brought her home with me and that's when the crazy came out.
Standing in the shower I had the water as hot as I could handle. The heat made my skin redden and the scars on my wrist were accented. Smart, that's what she was, scars in places that were hidden, like my left wrist under my watch, my thighs where my boxer briefs covered them, and from time to time even my scalp where my unruly hair covered them with ease. I wasn't her first and I'm certain since our time apart there had been plenty of others. Probably guys that wanted it, that weren't lured into it like I was. I stuck my head under the shower head, almost wishing I could drown the thoughts and memories, but knowing it would all come crashing back in a few hours.
As I sat pulling on my shoes, I found my gaze settling on my bed. Not much in my apartment had changed since Lynsey and I, the room was very much the same as it was the first night I had a one on one with her insanity. We had finished dinner and Matthew had brought us here. I had dismissed him, knowing that Miss Franklin wasn't going to be needing a ride home that evening. I remember Matthew giving me a knowing look when he left. Coming inside Lynsey had insisted on having some wine. I fixed the glasses and then she shooed me off to change, telling me that she was fine and wished I would just get out of that suit she always saw me in. That was mistake number one – leaving my glass unattended. Who would have ever thought that a guy would have to guard his booze in his own house? But sadly with her that was the case. I had changed into a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt, finished the first glass and started the next when things got fuzzy. Up until that point we had shared in small talk, made out a bit, and basically enjoyed each other's company. We had taken the wine to my room, so when whatever was in my drink kicked in, her petite frame didn't have to move me at all. I was right where she wanted me. I had come to secured to my bed, naked and gagged.
I shook my head forcefully against the memories and quickly got to my feet, not wanting to relieve that night, but having the memories fighting for space in my consciousness. Taking a glimpse in the mirror, I knew I was dressed like she wanted. I had on jeans, something I wore rarely pre-Lynsey and never post-Lynsey, and a plain white t-shirt, something else I wore only under dress shirts, never solo, and a pair of brown boots. All three were staples in my wardrobe and probably were in most men's closets, but each piece caused me to think of her and that scared the shit out of me. To know that a person, a woman, could have such control over you, was somewhat frightening. I had managed to push her to the recesses of my brain in the time that had passed. I had avoided going to visit my mother at work because it helped me not think about her. But sadly and sadistically on my part, there were times when I missed her or perhaps missed what she did to me. I wasn't proud of that. I wasn't proud of the fact that the woman basically raped me the first time we were together, yet I allowed it to happen multiple times after that. Men weren't supposed to be raped by women. It wasn't something you heard of in the media, and you sure as hell didn't hear about the son of a well-known millionaire getting raped by his mother's secretary. I'm sure the media would have a field day with that. So I told no one, I'm not quite sure how it finally ended with Lynsey, maybe she got bored with beating and fucking me, maybe I called it off…the later I'm certain wasn't what happened. It was like when she was around I couldn't think straight, I knew it was wrong and I shouldn't let it happen, but I allowed it to happen time and time again. In the midst of it all my conscious would hit me and I'd want to stop, but my body would win out over my brain and I'd do nothing to stop it. It was addicting, and I felt I had finally overcome my addiction, yet here it was again, entering my life. I prayed that it truly would be one and done this time.
Got more coming to you by the weekend! Please review!