Chapter 2: Assemble to Team

Deadpool stared at the large breasted blonde girl in front of him and barked at the ceiling "You knew this would happen! You knew what would happen!" The blonde raised an eyebrow at him and questioned "You alright there guy? You seem like you're having a moment of insanity." Sane commented "If only she knew the truth." Crazy laughed "We're crazier than a barrel full of monkeys!" The blonde jumped a bit as the boxes appeared by the man's head.

"What the hell!" She barked. "What are those?" Deadpool looked at his White and Yellow thought boxes, both with "…" in them. "You can see them?" Deadpool questioned as he pointed to his thought boxes. "Yeah, they're kinda hard to miss when they appear out of nowhere." The blonde pointed out. Sane sighed "So we're going to be having more of these moments then."

Crazy cheered "Now maybe more people will talk to us!"

"We're voices in our head… I don't think that is the best psychological solution to our problem."

"Um… what?"

"Never mind."

"So who are you and why are you knocking on my door?" the blonde questioned. Deadpool remembered why he was there and exclaimed "Oh yeah! My name is Deadpool! Aka Wade Wilson, aka the Merc with the Mouth, aka the greatest mercenary ever!" The blonde looked at him with a raised eyebrow and introduced "Well, my name Yang Xiao Long. So what are you doing here?"

"I was hired by Professor Ozpin to take down the White Fang and Team RWBY is going to help me!"

Yang continued to stare at the red suited mercenary with a raised eye brow, unsure if he was joking or if he was serious. Deadpool reached behind him and pulled out a large stack of papers, proclaiming "It's all here in the script." Sane grumbled "First time we've ever gone by the script." Crazy chuckled "Scripts are for squares!"

"Well we need the script for this story since we don't know where to go from here."

"Oh… right."

Deadpool declared "Moving on!" Deadpool forced his way into the room as Yang flipped through the script labelled "Four Assassins". Deadpool looked around the small room to see a pair of improvised bunk beds that could probably kill him. There were three other girls in the room, a small girl in a red cloak, another girl in a white dress, and a girl dressed in black with her face in a book. Sane proclaimed "So much for a team of assassins."

Crazy pointed out "It seems like they would rather get ready for prom." The girl in white jumped out of her seat and barked "And who do you think you are just to barge in here!" Deadpool groaned "Great, we have one of these girls." Sane and Crazy groaned "Perfect." The girl in white questioned "What do you mean 'one of these girls'?"

Deadpool explained "A girl who thinks she's better than everyone else and thinks she can tell people what to do." Sane simplified "A bitch, basically."

"And you two know what we do to bitches."

Deadpool pulled out a pistol and pointed at Weiss as Crazy answered "Kill them!" Deadpool pulled the trigger and a flag came out that said 'BANG' on it in big funny letters. Deadpool looked at the flag as his phone went off. "Hello?" Deadpool answered as he looked at the flag. "No killing main characters." Narrator proclaimed, and then promptly hung up.

Deadpool sighed as he put his phone and pistol away "Looks like you get to live… for now." Weiss looked absolutely stunned at the fact that he pulled a gun on her, mouth still agape. Yang stepped out from behind Deadpool and declared "Yep. This guy is legit. He definitely was hired by Professor Ozpin to take out the White Fang and we are supposed to help him." Weiss recovered from her shock and barked "How are we supposed to work with a psychopath like this!?"

"Well, we work with you… so close enough."

"No one cares for your input, Blondie."

Deadpool spoke up "I do. She has jokes." Deadpool and Yang promptly fist bumped as Weiss huffed. "So what is your name?" The black haired girl questioned from behind her book.

"I am Deadpool! The greatest mercenary ever!"

"Well, I'm Blake, Blake Belladonna."

The girl in the red cloak hung from her bed and introduced "My name is Ruby Rose, and that is Weiss Schnee. So what does Deadpool mean?" Deadpool responded "Who cares what Deadpool means! It sounds awesome! So… who's ready to go after the White Fang?" Ruby and Yang threw their hands up while Blake kept her face in her book and Weiss crossed her arms. "Do you even know where the White Fang is? Or how many of them will be there? Do you even have a plan?"

"Well, my plan is find them and kill them all! That's the plan."

"You will surely be outnumbered and out gunned."

"That's why I carry these two when I run out of ammo."

Deadpool pulled out his katanas and swung them a bit, careful not to cut down his teammates. "And if they kill you?" Weiss questioned. Deadpool responded as he put his blades away "Easy! I can't die!" He pulled his pistol back out, the flag now gone, and shot himself in the side of the head. Ruby screamed as red splattered against Weiss' white dress, Blake's eyes wide and Yang's mouth hung open.

The team stared at the body that laid on the ground, horrified that the mercenary that just walked in was now dead. Deadpool jumped to his feet and proclaimed "See! I can't die!" All of the girls stared at him with wide eyes and mouths agape at the fact that he just blew his brains out and was still standing. "All you did was freak them out." Sane updated. "You didn't prove anything other than we're insane and immortal." Deadpool continued to look around the room in the uncomfortable silence until he proclaimed "So yeah… there's that. Anyway… White Fang… yeah."

The girls eventually regained their composure and took a seat to try and take in the information they just received. Deadpool took a seat to give the girls a moment until Ruby questioned "So you really can't die? How did that happen?"

"Because me and Thanos are both in love with Lady Death so Thanos put a curse on me that prevents me from dying. This way, the two of us can never be together."

"That's so sad. How do you cope with that?"

"By getting other girls. Right now I've got a fire cracker named Lilith and daym is she hot!"

Crazy agreed "Hell YES she is!" Sane added "Indeed she is." Ruby looked a little surprised by Deadpool's response and his thought boxes additions. Deadpool declared "So! The White Fang… who is ready to go on a killing spree?" The room grew disturbingly quiet as Deadpool went on "What? Did the four of you really think that I am here to be diplomatic? I'm not the Merc with the Mouth because I talk a lot."

"That's exactly why we're known as the Merc with the Mouth." Sane grumbled. "Yeah! We make a lot of jokes!" Crazy laughed. "Couldn't we find a way to do this without killing people?" Blake questioned. "We could try diplomacy."

"But that's no fuuuuuuuun."

Deadpool sighed "Ugh, looks like this is going to be a problem." He scratched his chin in sporadic thought until a light bulb appeared over his head, cheering "I have an idea! Suddenly, there was a knock at the door!" All of the girls looked to the door as there was a knock at the door, just as Deadpool called. The door opened to reveal a young man of at least 20 wearing a black jacket with a grey stripe down the center. He was also wearing a black Skyrim hat and dirty blue jeans.

An M9 pistol was attached to his right hip while an M4 carbine was slung over his right shoulder. A pair of black Oakley sunglasses covered his eyes as he held out his arms. "How the FUCK did you break the fourth wall this goddamn hard?" the young man shouted. "How did you break the fourth wall so hard that I was dragged into this story and not appear like Castiel?" Deadpool stood up and introduced "Ladies, I'd like you to meet ChiefD3m0n1c, aka the Narrator!"

"I don't give a shit what you call me. How the FUCK did you do this?"

"How vulgar." Weiss grumbled as she crossed her arms. "I don't need your shit Weiss." Narrator snapped as he pulled out his pistol. Narrator pointed the weapon at Deadpool and put three rounds into his chest. Deadpool fell to the ground as the girls screamed, Narrator holstering his pistol as Deadpool writhed on the ground. Deadpool got up as Narrator pulled out a chair and took a seat.

"So who are you?" Blake questioned, finally setting the book down. "Are you a god?" Narrator scratched his chin and replied "No… yes… somewhere in between. Anything I want to happen can and will happen. No arguments, discussions or anything."

"You can do anything?"

Weiss argued "I doubt he can do anything." Narrator raised an eyebrow and questioned "You dare question my power?"

"I do, actually. Prove it."

Narrator smiled evilly and replied "Fine. Have you ever heard of the term Freezer Burn? And I'm not talking about what happens when you leave something in the freezer for too long." Everyone looked at him with a raised eyebrow, even the thought boxes had a ",:I" icon in their boxes. Narrator raised his right hand and snapped, seeming to cause Yang and Weiss to falter a bit. The two shook their heads to try and shake whatever Narrator did to them. When Weiss and Yang looked up, their eyes met and smiles spread across their faces.

Weiss flicked some of her loose hair back as Yang stood up and ran her fingers through the top of her hair. "Hey there Weiss." Yang proclaimed in a flirty tone as she took a few steps towards Weiss. Weiss batted her eyelashes at Yang as Yang placed her hands on Weiss' hips, pushing her against the dresser. "What's going on?" Ruby questioned in an uncomfortable tone as Yang practically threw Weiss onto the top of the dresser. Blake tried to scoot closer to the wall as Weiss reached up and ran her fingers through Yang's long hair.

"Freezer Burn is the name of a pairing or shipping…" Narrator proclaimed, a sly smile never leaving his face, "between Yang and Weiss." At the sound of their names, Yang and Weiss immediately embraced each other, lips locking together as Yang pulled Weiss as close to her as possible and Weiss wrapping her arms around Yang's neck to pull her as deep into the kiss as possible. Ruby and Blake looked horribly uncomfortable as Weiss wrapped her legs around Yang's waist and Yang brought one hand to the back of Weiss' neck. Deadpool watched the two with an intrigued curiosity as Sane proclaimed "We are oddly aroused by this." Crazy cheered "This is really HOT!"

"Can you please make this stop?" Ruby questioned uncomfortably. "This is incredibly awkward to see my sister making out with the girl she hates." Narrator looked to the two making out and proclaimed "Yeah, it is a little awkward. Alright, I'll make it stop." Narrator raised his right hand and snapped, causing Yang and Weiss to stop their embrace. The two looked at each other, lips still locked, and then shot apart. Yang immediately ran to the bathroom and grabbed the mouthwash as Weiss furiously rubbed her mouth against her sleeve.

"Alright! Whatever you say goes!" Weiss spat. "Just don't ever do that again!" Narrator and Deadpool started laughing their asses off as Yang walked out of the bathroom wiping her mouth. Deadpool and Narrator calmed themselves and Narrator sighed "Alright Deadpool, I know why you called me here." Deadpool questioned "Really?"

"Yes. You want a team of assassins to help you kill the White Fang while Team RWBY does the intel gathering and moments like that since they are reluctant to kill."

"That's exactly what I wanted! Thank you Santa!"

"Yeah, I'm leaving now."

Narrator got up and headed for the door. He stopped just before and looked over his left shoulder, proclaiming "Oh yeah, something for you Blake." Blake raised an eyebrow as Narrator lifted his right hand and snapped. She braced herself for whatever Narrator did to her, but nothing happened that she could tell. "What did you do?" Blake questioned.

"I'll tell you what my DM tells me whenever I ask him something… don't worry about it."

Narrator opened the door and exclaimed "Deadpool, your team will show up in the next chapter. I'm calling it Mercenary, Terminator, Paladin and Assassin. I know you'll enjoy the team I've assembled for you." Narrator walked out and closed the door, leaving the group in a silence. "What a maniacal genius." Sane grumbled "Leaving cliff hangers for days." Deadpool looked to Blake and questioned "Exactly, like what did he do to Blake?" Everyone looked to Blake, who looked really worried about what was to come.

EXPLOOOOOOOOOOOOSIOOOOOOOOONS! There is chapter 2 of Four Assassins! Hope y'all enjoyed this story as it tore down the fourth wall and even dragged me into the story. As to what I did to Blake? Like I said… don't worry about it.

Deadpool: TELL ME WHAT YOU DID!

Me: NEVER!

Deadpool: You'll break… they always do. Anyway, PM or review the story to let Capt. Asshole know what you guys think.