Chapter 9

Kate squinted as she pulled up to the quiet office buildings. She glanced down at the GPS on her phone and looked around in confusion as it appeared to be quite empty in the small plaza she had been directed to. The address that Bo had given her took her away from the busy streets of downtown LA to a business district not far from downtown Long Beach. She parked the rental car near the walkway leading towards the buildings and followed the path up to suite 100 as instructed.

"Kate...over here."

Bo gave the other brunette a small wave motioning for her to come over to the small table just outside the glass door. Kate smiled and took a seat across from Bo looked at her expectantly. She had to admit she'd been curious all night about what Bo wanted to discuss and now that she was here she had no idea what questions she wanted to ask the businesswoman. "I have to admit Bo, I was a bit surprised you called yesterday."

Bo sighed and nodded as she drummed her fingers lightly on the folder in front of her. She looked at Kate with what appeared to be a shy smile and motioned to the office space with a nostalgic look on her face. "This was the first location of the Lewis Foundation."

Kate looked at the small office courtyard slowly taking in the charming serenity that seemed to emanate from it. She looked back at Bo with a smile not ignoring the fact that Bo ignored her comment about the confusion about being called here. "Cozy."

Bo laughed and nodded sadly. "The intent of Lauren opening the foundation was to have a space to do some research while keeping up her hours at UCLA part time. It was supposed to be something she could do on her terms and still keep her connected to medicine, which is the only thing she's known in her entire life. It was also supposed to give her more time for us to consider having a family. "

Kate looked thoughtful. "Sounds nice. So what happened?"

Bo sighed as she thought about how their life was supposed to be. She was supposed to get her business going, Lauren would settle into her practice and research and they would have more time to focus on their family. All of this seemed to fizzle out however when Lauren's work became increasingly busier and her own work became successful faster than she'd planned. They were both constantly pulled in numerous directions leaving no time for them to follow through on the things they both said they really wanted...or at least thought they wanted at one point or another.

Bo leaned back in her chair and looked around quietly. That question was more complicated than Bo was prepared to deal with at the moment so she just kind of shrugged. "Life happened. But it doesn't matter now right? Anyway, I brought these since it's what you came all the way down from San Francisco for." Bo slid the folder across the table and Kate knew what was in them without even having to open it. She had to admit she was a bit sad that Bo had given in so easily and she still wondered how two people who were seeming in the truest of love at one point were able to walk away from the life they'd built together with so little of a fight.

"Bo?"

Lauren walked up to the pair with some confusion on her face. Kate had called her after she'd spoken with Bo and asked Lauren to meet her at the same location hoping she'd be able to get them alone for a bit. She had been vague with Lauren about the reason why but once the doctor heard the address she knew the young mediator was up to something. She'd almost declined the offer to meet Kate knowing she didn't want to go somewhere that would bring up old memories but curiosity had gotten the better of her.

To Lauren that location held all the promises of what her life with Bo was supposed to be...a representation of the dreams that had been shattered when they started having problems and then ultimately when Bo had cheated. She'd expected to feel a myriad of emotions that she hadn't allowed herself to feel for a long time as she was certain Kate was going to want to have some kind of trip down memory lane. She had expected to hear from the young mediator about why she should consider having a discussion with Bo about what was going on and she had been prepared to argue why as it wasn't something she wanted or needed at this point. She thought she was prepared for whatever Kate had in store for her except the one thing that she found waiting here. What she hadn't expected however was to see her wife, or soon to be ex-wife rather, sitting there with Kate waiting for her.

The blonde ignored Bo's presence and looked at Kate expectantly. To her credit the young mediator looked somewhat sheepish as she looked at the pair with a sly smile. "Bo requested this meeting with just us three and I agreed. Thought it would be good to get you two away from the offices and the lawyers and the formality of it all and just talk."

Lauren crossed her arms over her chest and looked skeptical. "I'm surprised Bo went anywhere without Evony. Seems she can't seem to keep away from her these days."

Bo sighed in annoyance and rolled her eyes as she leaned back in the chair pouting slightly. "And I'm surprised to see that Tamsin let you out of her sight. I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't have a tracking device on you."

Lauren finally turned to look at Bo and she smirked slightly as she sneered at her. "What's wrong honey jealous are we? Concerned that my attorney is taking things beyond the board room?"

Bo tutted slightly as she folded her own arms over her chest. "Of that half brained idiot? Never."

Lauren pretended to laugh sarcastically. "A few months ago I would have said the same about Evony but as we both know the difference between me and you is that I can separate personal from professional."

Bo frowned and looked at Lauren in annoyance. "If you came here to argue then I'm leaving." She turned to the other brunette who was watching the scene unfold with some level of trepidation on her face. "Kate, you got what you needed...goodbye."

Finally snapping to action, Kate stood up and held her arms up slightly. "Okay hold it. Lauren, sit. Bo, sit. Now listen up, this is how we are going to do things. I've spent the better part of the last few days listening to you two, and your counsel, argue with no actual communication happening. I brought you two together to see if there is any part of this relationship worth salvaging, but the only way you're going to figure that out is if you actually talk. Do you think you can handle that?"

Bo and Lauren did as they were told and took their seats slowly while continuing to glare at each other without saying anything. They both had their reasons for being hesitant to open the floodgates that would escape once they really started having an honest conversation. It probably was fair to say that they already knew what the other would say but at this point it was mostly pride that was precluding them from being able to actually voice their thoughts.

Kate looked at them with exasperation. "Well?"

Bo sighed and nodded slowly while Lauren just kind of grunted and looked away not wanting to make eye contact with her wife. Kate rolled her eyes at their childish behavior but she had to admit she was pleased they were at least willing to entertain the possibility of a real discussion. She reclaimed her own seat as well and looked at them waiting for one of them to break the silence. After a few minutes of Bo studying the table in front of her while Lauren seemed to find the architecture of the building fascinating Kate finally gave in and started things off. "Okay, well since you both suddenly have nothing to say how about I give you my-"

"Why did you never want kids Lauren? The real reason...spare me the bullshit you've been giving me all these years."

The outburst was a surprise to say the least and Kate looked from Bo to Lauren silently wondering if she was about to experience WWIII right here, right now. She hadn't really planned out what she was going to say to them but Bo's interruption was both welcome and a bit confusing as she hadn't expected this to be the topic of conversation.

Lauren seethed silently for a few minutes trying to keep control of both her anger and her emotions as she looked at Bo behind stoic eyes letting her doctor persona take over. Bo frowned as she noticed the slight change in Lauren's expression and she knew the rest of this conversation was pointless. As usual, when Lauren felt she was being cornered or she wasn't happy about something she suppressed all emotion and became Dr. Lewis which frustrated Bo to no end. It was challenging enough to communicate rationally when things were strained but when Lauren shut down it was all Bo could do not to yell and scream at her about not caring, or rather her inability to show any kind of emotion where they were concerned. The traits that made Lauren such a successful surgeon were the same ones that Bo loathed in their personal life and at the moment she didn't give a shit about keeping her composure or rational thoughts.

"Well? I'm waiting Dr. Lewis…"

Lauren showed no emotion as she looked at Bo and calmly spoke to her as if she were addressing one of her patients and trying to explain a complicated procedure to them in layman's terms. "The reasons I have given you are not bullshit Bo, but I wouldn't expect you to understand things from my perspective. In fact, I now question the basis for our entire relationship as it seems you can't seem to grasp any concept that deviates from your line of thinking and course of action."

Bo leaned forward in slight anger as she balled one hand into a fist out of frustration. "I'm sorry Doctor but we all don't operate like you do. Not all of us plan out every move we make to a calculated level of precision and not let real emotion or feeling play a part in our relationships."

Lauren looked at Bo with what the brunette perceived as almost a bored like stare and scoffed in disgust. "If you think having children wasn't something that needed to be thought through and planned out then you're right, you don't live like me."

Bo sighed in frustration as she felt the all too familiar feelings of annoyance creeping up on her due to the subject of conversation. "And I am glad for that. Yes Lauren, for your information I did think it through and in fact we'd discussed the financial impact as well as how having a family would change our lives in thorough detail. Did you forget your rants about how you didn't want our family to be tainted by the so called blood money that you scoff at almost daily? Don't forget honey, it's that blood money that gave you the funds you needed to start your groundbreaking research. Or maybe that's not it. Maybe you forgot about those nights where all you would do is give me some lame excuse as to why 'now isn't the right time' before walking away. Because that's all I remember Lauren. You walking away...from the possibility of a family, from me, from our marriage at times."

"But I'm not the one who went and fucked someone else am I?"

Dead silence hit the trio at Lauren's last statement. Kate looked at Lauren and shook her head knowing the blonde wasn't going to entertain any kind of conversation about what went wrong in their marriage until the pair dealt with Bo's infidelity. It was a bit of the stubborn streak she'd seen in the office that first day they'd met and she knew Bo wasn't willing to broach the subject of the cheating, at least not with some understanding that it was to work through it instead of fighting about it.

"Okay, well that wasn't quite what I had in mind when I suggested you two talk but I think this is good. Right? I mean, okay, not good but…"

Bo put her hand up to stop Kate's rambling in an attempt to salvage the situation. She stood up and nodded at Kate before looking at Lauren with a neutral stare with traces of a sad smile on her lips. "It's okay Kate, you tried but as you can see I don't think this situation can be resolved. My wife won't get past this or attempt to try and talk about this rationally so I think you should go ahead and give her what she wants. You see Kate, when Lauren wants to discuss something we have to do it right then and now but when it comes to things that are important to me she cannot be bothered. At least not with the big things. Like a family or what we want our future to look like. Apparently that was beneath her to discuss as she'd seemingly made the decision for us so why go through the motions of actually handling it like a couple instead of the selfish route that she took. If she wants to use this as an excuse for all of our problems then go ahead. It doesn't change the fact that we had problems long before this." Bo motioned to the papers that Kate was holding and turned to walk back to her car.

"Fuck you Bo Dennis. You don't get to make me the bad guy here. I'm not the one who violated the sanctity of our marriage and stepped outside to screw someone else. I'm not the one who shut out her partner when things weren't going her way and then tried to play the victim in this whole situation. And I'm certainly not the one who didn't just slip once but had a full blown fucking affair."

Bo turned and could literally feel the anger radiating off of Lauren but instead of making her feel bad it seemed to only fuel her own anger that she'd been working so hard to keep in check all these months. "No Lauren, you're not. But you are the one who always had an excuse for everything. You are the one who used work as an avoidance technique and who would never let me all the way in about what you were feeling. You are the one who made the decisions without ever telling me then getting mad when I don't know what the fuck is going on."

Lauren laughed sarcastically and shook her head. "And you are the one who instead of talking to me about how you were feeling decided to take matters into your own hands. Literally." Truth be told she knew there was some truth to what Bo said. More often than not she was acting without making sure Bo was in line with what she was doing, mostly a result of her job where she was used to making tough decisions and taking action and not always stopping to think before she did.

Bo shook her head and took a step closer to Lauren out of anger. "Don't change the subject Lauren. Because fact of the matter is YOU are the one who shut me out to the point where I even considered taking matters into my own hands."

Tears formed in Lauren's eyes as she thought about that last statement from Bo. It wasn't lost on her that Bo was basically blaming her for the cheating. Not in a roundabout way but flat out telling her that she pushed Bo into Evony's bed. That was something she wasn't prepared to face, at least in the presence of another. Sure, she knew they had their problems and that communication was an issue with them but she also knew no matter what it didn't justify Bo's actions.

Lauren nodded and bit the inside of her cheek a bit to keep her composure. "Well I'm sorry you feel that way. Apparently my assumption that at some point you would be able to handle our problems like a grown up were overestimating your level of maturity Bo. And I hope you are happy with your choice because no matter what kind of problems we were having we could have dealt with them. But all of that doesn't matter now."

Bo nodded in agreement for the first time in what felt like forever. "No, it doesn't. Because all of this doesn't matter. This isn't about the affair Lauren. It's about more than that. It's about our failed marriage."

Lauren looked at her with a bit of surprise. "I can't believe you even noticed things were going badly Bo. You were so wrapped up with work and everything I was starting to think you just came home to sleep."

Bo snorted and shook her head. "I don't know what you're complaining about Lauren."

The blonde looked at her with confusion. "What are you talking about Bo?"

The brunette sighed and shook her head sadly. "I'm talking about the fact that even when things changed you didn't see it. You're so wrapped up in your own head that you don't see the things that are right in front of you." There were a million things Bo could have been referring to with that statement and Lauren stared at her with the stoic look Bo had become so accustomed to as her mind reeled.

Fuck no.

It dawned on Lauren what Bo was referring to and she tensed slightly as the full weight of the statement hit her. "Including the fact that you continued sleeping with me while you were fucking her?" True, they'd discussed that and Bo had admitted how long the affair was going on but Lauren had done her best to compartmentalize then and now it seems as if everything were fresh and hitting the surface again. Perhaps it was because she hadn't voiced the thoughts before or perhaps it was because it hadn't been put so bluntly to her but she was realizing how far this affair stretched into their lives.

"Tell me Bo, say it. Say you were going from her bed to ours and even that didn't keep you up at night because as I recall sleeping peacefully was never your problem. You disgust me Bo Dennis and you know what? I can't even complain because you and I both know where your true talents lie. Dear."

She knew Lauren was egging her on but for some reason Bo wasn't looking to carry on the fight that was fizzling just below the surface. Instead she looked at her calmly but with remorse. "I don't know what else to say Lauren."

The blonde looked at her shaking with anger as she balled her hands into fists reminiscent of the night when Bo had first confessed. "There is nothing else you can say Bo. There is nothing that would justify this and nothing you can blame me for that would result in your infidelity. You fucked up Bo. You ruined us and for once you and your money can't fix the problem."

Bo's face hardened slightly at the mention of money. "What does that mean?"

Lauren felt the anger swell and she took her own step closer to Bo in frustration. "The foundation. The research money. You were buying what you wanted Bo. Your family. You manipulated the situation to get what you want."

Bo slammed her hand on the table out of her own frustrated anger. "And you withheld information about that. For almost three years you fucking strung me along knowing that the idea of this working was something that I would hold on to. Why Lauren? Why go through all that trouble? Why not tell me about the research working?"

Lauren wrapped her arms around herself in effort to bring some comfort in this situation. "I had planned to Bo. But once again you stood me up for work or Evony or you know what, it doesn't even matter. Fact is once again you skipped out on me and you're right, I made a decision for us then Bo. I decided that if you couldn't even keep your word to meet me for dinner that I couldn't trust you to be there when our child was born."

Even Kate had to take a breath at that statement knowing it was probably heavier than necessary at this point. Bo looked at Lauren with disbelief and shook her head sadly. "The fact that you would even doubt that...I don't know what to say Lauren. At least I know now why you never fully let me in."

Lauren held her stoic gaze and took a deep breath as she spoke calmly. "And the fact that you don't even dispute that confirms I was right in that decision."

Bo growled slightly as she seethed. "What can I say Lauren, I got used to giving in when it came to you. Better to let it go than fight with you. It was a losing battle when all you would do is shut down. You did it earlier and you're doing it now. God Lauren, don't you even realize you do that? Because I sure as hell do."

Lauren looked at her with anger and almost a pitying smile. "What can I say Bo, may be I thought you wouldn't understand."

She knew Kate didn't realize but that last comment was a dig at her upbringing. When they first got together Bo would joke around about being the simple bartender that happened to end up with Lauren Lewis, the world class surgeon with the elite pedigree. Lauren always comforted her making sure she knew the fact that Bo barely graduated high school and was working a service job when they met had no bearing on her feelings towards her. In all honesty that was the complete truth and when they'd argue or what not she always made it a point to not bring up Bo's education or anything about her background. Well, that was until now.

Bo had to hand it to Lauren, this was the first time the blonde had really let the claws come out and she had to admit it was kind of what she had been expecting throughout their time together. Lauren had always been so controlled, even when they fought it drove Bo crazy to the point where she'd sometimes annoy her just to provoke some kind of reaction from her. But this Lauren was different. She wasn't holding anything back and it was almost impressive if all of her anger wasn't directed at Bo.

Bo smirked as she shook her head. "You're right Lauren, after all how could a simple person like me possibly understand someone as sophisticated as you."

Lauren pursed her lips at this last statement from Bo knowing it was only in response to her dig at Bo's education level. As long as she could remember Lauren hated being known as "a Lewis" as she'd assumed she'd gotten a lot of things in her life due to her last name. Thats why her relationship with Bo was so special to her. It was something removed from her past and something that was hers and hers alone. Bo didn't care that her family was prominent in the medical community. Bo didn't have ulterior motives in trying to befriend or in her case romance Lauren in order to advance her own career. Bo's love for her was pure and honest and it was this reason that Lauren was so devastated when it all came crashing down.

Kate looked at the pair with confusion as she listened to this latest bit of their conversation. She knew there was something she was missing but ultimately she was happy they weren't at each others throats anymore. She put her hands up and looked at them cautiously. "Okay, can I make a suggestion here?"

Both women turned to her with annoyed expressions. They both sort of forgot she was there and now that she'd made her presence known they weren't sure how to proceed from here. Kate gave them a sheepish smile and held up the folder that Bo had given her. "I'm just gonna take these and go get some coffee...give you two time to keep working this out. When I come back if you want Lauren, you can sign them and I'll be on my way." She started to move towards the car but stopped and turned back to them with her hand held out. "Keys."

Bo looked confused and glanced at Lauren before looking back at Kate. "What?"

Kate sighed. "Give me your car keys. You two need to hash whatever this is out and I don't want one of you leaving before I get back. So give me your car keys."

Both women looked at each other and rolled their eyes as they handed over their respective keys. It was ridiculous to both of them but Kate had a suspicion that if she didn't take this precaution that she'd come back and they'd both be gone. She nodded at them and pointed to each of them in turn. "Okay, now talk. Like grown ups. I'll be back."

She turned to leave with some trepidation not knowing if this was a smart move or not. She'd witnessed a pretty raw conversation between them and she knew there was a lot that hadn't been said yet but absolutely needed to be put on the table if they were going to work through this. She crossed her fingers as she hopped into her rental car and pulled up the GPS on her phone searching for the nearest coffee establishment. One thing was for sure, if this didn't work she wasn't sure anything would.