"I DO"
Most people are nervous on their wedding day, but I am not. Even though we've had a few ups and downs, there was never any doubt that Tobias is who I belong with. He is the love of my life.
This day isn't without its pain, though. I wish I had my father to walk me down the aisle. I wish I had my mother to sit by him and hold his hand while he passes her his handkerchief to wipe away her tears. I wish Tobias' mom was alive and that he had a father who cared. But we don't have those things. Instead we made our own family, one filled with love and laughter and friendship.
The one thing I do have is Caleb to walk me down the aisle. He comes inside my tent, looking as handsome as ever in his suit, and my heart flutters. It's almost time.
"I'm almost ready," I say, holding back the tears like I've done all morning. Christina and I talked about all of our good memories and cried as much as we could to try and get them all out, but it was all for naught. There are too many emotions inside of me right now and I can't help it.
"Look at you," he says, smiling. "You look stunning. Tobias is gonna flip."
"You think so?" I ask, dabbing at the corner of my eye with a tissue.
"I know so, Beatrice. I love you."
"I love you too, Caleb."
He steps closer, a wide, loving smile on his face. I lean forward as he wraps his arms around me. I hold on tight, taking in the parts of our parents I see in him, and melding them with mine.
"Everything is good to go. We're ready when you are," he says when I pull away. He winks at me and steps out of the tent.
Tobias and I didn't want to do anything too fancy, so we found an area in one of the nearby parks that holds weddings. They have chairs and tables there already, and you can either provide some decorations or you can tell them what you like and they will decorate it for you. We chose the latter.
I saw the giant tree we're going to be standing in front of when I arrived earlier, and it took my breath away.
The chairs are arranged so they're facing it, with a runner covered in flow petals parting the two sides. The tree has white streamers that look like they're made of flowers and crystals and lights all throughout hanging down to the ground. It's perfect. I fix one last curl and take a look in the mirror.
My gown is simple — white, empire waist — a thin black satin ribbon wrapped around it, thin spaghetti straps to show off my ravens, and full flowing soft chiffon. My hair is braided into a crown, with the rest curled into ringlets, tiny white flowers securing everything in the back. I know Tobias decided to go with everything black, but I haven't seen what he's wearing. He wanted it to be a surprise just like my dress is. I told my bridesmaids —Christina, Shauna and Marlene— to choose their own dresses, as long as they were black too.
"Are you ready?" Christina asks as the girls come in to check on me. She has on a dress that looks almost identical to mine, only short. And black with a white ribbon, of course.
"I dunno. Am I?" I smile at her and do a little twirl.
"Girl, you've been ready for this since the day you met."
I hear the music begin, and wait patiently for everyone to make their way down the aisle. And then Caleb is reaching his hand out for me and we're walking out into the open and the smiling faces of our family and friends remind me that this is really happening. I am finally marrying Tobias.
I let out a nervous laugh with everyone's eyes on me. I look to the alter to see Tobias standing there, that sweet half grin on his face. My hands shake a little as I take him in, trying to remember how to breathe. My hands are sweating as I latch onto Caleb for support; I've seen Tobias dressed up plenty of times before, but he is striking in all black.
Our entire relationship has been leading to this moment, I think to myself, and now that it's here, my body doesn't know whether to laugh or cry. The amount of emotions going through me right now is almost overwhelming. The one thing I do know is that I am happier than I have ever been.
"Who gives this woman away?" our officiant asks when Caleb and I come to a stop.
"Our parents and I do," Caleb says. I look to him, and his eyes are wet. Dammit. I give him a quick hug and take Tobias' outstretched hand.
We stand facing each other, and even though my hands are sweating and trembling and I'm starting to see everything through a blur of tears, he is steady. My heart thumps as Tobias looks at me like it is only the two of us left in the entire world.
"It is my understanding that you have written your own vows?"
"Yes," Tobias says. He gives me a small smile and clears his throat.
"Tris. I have never met anyone like you, and I knew from that very first moment when we met on that ship, that you were someone worth knowing. I just never imagined that such a small, innocent moment would lead me to the happiest day of my life. That I would be lucky enough to get to love you forever.
"You saved me, Tris, in so many ways. You never gave up on me, and that means so much, I don't even know how to properly put it into words. You treat me like I deserve to be treated. You love me like I deserve to be loved. You are my heart, and my soul.
"I promise to love you, through the bad times and the good. I promise to treat you with the respect you deserve. I promise to take care of you. I promise to be your rock as you are mine. But most of all, I promise that I will never, ever hurt you.
"I will love you with every fiber of my being until the day that I die. And even after that I will continue to love you."
I think I started crying ten words in. I let out a little laugh as Christina takes my bouquet and hands me a tissue. I dab at my eyes to the chuckle of the crowd, and take the vows I wrote from Chris.
"Tobias, I was never sure if fate existed when I was younger, and as time went on, I was even less convinced when I lost my parents. It seemed so unfair to plan something like that. I couldn't believe that this was what life had in store for me. But then I met you, and everything changed. I have no doubt that Fate brought me to you that night, and I will never be able to repay Fate for what my life has become.
"You love me like no one else ever could, and I can't wait to start our life together, as husband and wife. You and I might not have much of a family left, but together we have made one, and it is so much better than I could have ever imagined. Fate knew what she was doing that day.
"I promise to take care of you when you are sick, and to laugh at your silly jokes. I promise to love you with all of my heart, and to never take that love away, even if times get rough. You are worth loving, Tobias. You are worth fighting for. You are worthy of this life we have made."
I hand Christina the paper and smile up at Tobias. He nods, a soft smile on his face. I might not have been as eloquent as he was or memorized what I wanted to say, but I want him to know more than anything that he is everything to me, and he deserves this. He is no longer defined by his past, and it makes me prouder than I have ever been.
Tobias takes my ring from Zeke, and I take his from Christina.
"Do you Tobias, promise to love Beatrice, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, until death do you part?"
"I do."
"And do you Beatrice, promise to love Tobias, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, until death do you part?"
"I do."
"Then by the power vested in me by the state of California, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."
Our friends and family cheer as Tobias and I wrap our arms around each other. We kiss, and that fire, that tingle, that energy erupts in me at every point of contact. I pull away, lips parted, trying to catch my breath.
"I am pleased to present to you, Tobias and Beatrice Eaton." Tobias grabs my hand, pulling it upwards in victory, and the two of us let out a laugh and a cheer as we look on at everyone who came to celebrate with us today.
"I love you," he says as he leads me down the aisle to our reception area.
"I love you too."
Tobias
I'm fucking starving.
I was too nervous to eat more than a banana this morning, and since we came over here, it's been pictures and thank you's and making sure the caterers are doing their job and that Tris was able to escape for a minute and go to the bathroom.
I finally find her again, and we sit down at our table. I feel a little like royalty sitting up on this platform observing everyone. They eat and talk and generally look like they're having a good time. Thank god.
"Here," Zeke says as he plops a plate full of tiny sandwiches in between us. "Want anything to drink?"
"Oh sweet jesus, thank you," Tris says as she takes a big bite of a sandwich. "I'll take whatever."
"Already on it," Christina says, dropping two flutes of champagne and a bottle of water down in front of us. She gives us both a smile before she saunters back off to Will.
"You two are lifesavers," I say, taking a big bite of my own sandwich. Tris laughs as she wipes some mayo off my face.
"Aww so cute. Get a room." Zeke grins before taking off.
"Your friends," Tris says around mouthful of food.
"Hey. They're yours too."
"Yeah. They are." She winks at me, and it makes my heart beat a little harder.
After another round of photographs, Zeke makes his way to the large deck in the grass that's serving as our dance floor, and grabs a mic. Christina makes her way up too, and I just know I'm about to be embarrassed to hell. I shoot him a look, but that shit-eating grin is plastered on his face. Tris takes my hand and gives it a squeeze, and I squeeze back. Surprisingly, it's Christina who talks.
"I don't have anything funny or witty to say, but I did want to come up here to congratulate my best friend on finding one of the greatest guys on the planet. Tobias, you and I might give each other a hard time here and there, but I love you, and I'm so glad that Tris met you. I've spent the last few years taking care of her, but now that job is all yours, my friend. Love each other well, and often." She winks and a few of our friends whistle while others chuckle. I raise my glass to her and nod, and she does the same as Zeke takes the mic from her. Shit.
"Oh Tobias, Tobias, Tobias. Where do I even begin?" Zeke smiles and everyone laughs. It's going to be a miracle if he leaves here tonight alive. "You, my friend, are a stubborn ass. But you managed to find the one thing in the world that makes you less stubborn, and that makes me happy. You will always be my brother, and I'm so glad to be able to officially call Tris my sister now." I look over at her, and see the love and appreciation in her eyes. She glances over at me, and gives a shy smile. It's so fucking adorable.
"So to Tris and Tobias. May you guys have a lifetime full of love. And lots and lots of sex." Uriah whoops as everyone raises their glasses. Tris looks like she wants to murder Zeke, but he smiles even wider, and she raises her glass. We drink to our toasts, and kiss and laugh as everyone cheers again.
"Now get your asses on the dance floor so the rest of us can!" Christina yells into the mic, and I stand, holding out my hand for Tris. She takes it and I lead her to the dance floor.
Tori and Caleb follow us up; I take Caleb's extended hand and shake it. I think he finally doesn't think of me as the big bad guy who took his little sister away from him. He smiles and claps me on the shoulder before turning to Tris. Tori smiles and gives me a crazy bear hug.
"I'm so proud of you," she whispers in my ear. "I really am. I always knew you would have all of this one day."
"Thanks," I say, rubbing the back of my neck when she lets go. I feel an elbow in my back and turn to see Tris and Caleb dancing. Oh, right. I take Tori's hand and lead her in a dance. There are so many things I want to say and thank Tori for, but there's one that is more important than the others. She deserves to hear it after all these years.
"I know you didn't date Marcus all that long, but you've always been there for me. I just wanted you to know that…you know…I do think of you as a mom. My mom. So thank you, for being the parent I never had." Tori's eyes light up and she hugs me again.
"You are so welcome." She kisses me on the cheek and tips her chin behind me. I turn to see Tris watching, smiling, as our song starts to play.
"Would you like to dance with me, Mr. Eaton?" she asks.
"It would be my pleasure, Mrs. Eaton."
And I'm thinking 'bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways
Maybe just the touch of a hand
Well, me—I fall in love with you every single day
And I just wanna tell you I am
Our friends join us now on the stage, and I smile as I watch Zeke scoop up Anna and pull Shauna closer, the three of them laughing and dancing together. I also spy Uriah pulling out a karaoke machine he had hidden behind the DJ. It fills me with so much pride that these people love us. That they chose us, too. As my eyes drift around, they eventually come to rest on Tris, and then it's just the two of us.
I have never seen her more beautiful than tonight. Her eyes are so full of life and love, and all of that is because of me. I never thought that I was capable of making someone this happy, of receiving their love in return, and I still have no idea how I got so lucky. But I thank the stars every day that she —quite literally— ran into my life. I could never have come this far without her.
I place my hand under her chin and tilt it up, kissing her. Her lips are soft and sweet and they fit perfectly against mine. I love that it still feels like time stops, like there isn't anything else in this world but her and I when we touch. That spark of electricity flows through me, and when I pull away, breathing heavy, her eyes open slowly as a smile breaks across her face.
"Don't ever stop doing that," she says.
"Okay," I say.
I won't ever stop loving you.
A/N:
Song: Ed Sheeran - Thinking Out Loud
Three years, 10 months