Hell is empty and all the devils are here
Now and forever
You're just another lost soul about to be mine again
See her, you'll never free her
You must surrender it all
In your life to meet again
Fire
All you desire
As she begins to turn cold and run out of time
You will shiver
Till you deliver
You will remember it all
Let it blow your mind again
He does not remember how he made it down from her chamber to the stables. All he knows, is that he is suddenly on Stranger's back, his hands clutching the reigns but not controlling them. Right now he couldn't even if he wanted to and so he lets the horse choose the way. Reliable as ever it strives against the stream of people, soldiers, women, children… it does not matter. Right now they are all just part of this madness he wants to leave behind so badly.
It's raining fire, green and red alike and he wouldn't be surprised to find out that they all have died already and just didn't notice it yet. Hell can't be that different. No, fuck that. In comparison to this inferno hell must be a friggin' paradise. He can feel the heat of the fires, it's just like he remembers it, but even stronger is the memory of another heat: a soft lithe body pressed against his not even an hour ago. He curses and spurs Stranger on, the stallion obediently picking up the pace, tearing through narrow back streets and finally stepping on one of the wide main ones. He doesn't check their course, it leads away from the fires, away from the Mud Gate. That's all he cares about.
They are still so far, though. The air is filled with screams, screams and smoke and the smell of blood, and the mass of people blocking his path does not seem to end. He urges the horse forward again and indignant Stranger throws his head back, but obeys. Absently, he pats his neck with trembling fingers, a silent apology.
The battle rages around him and its roar is deafening, but he doesn't listen. His ears are filled with a thin, trembling voice singing a long forgotten melody and the faint smell of lemon and lavender still lingers in his nose. It's not enough to soothe his terror, but it lets him keep his sanity, or that what's still left of it.
Damn the Seven, he wants to go back. Go back and drag her out of her room and take her with him, but the sea has closed behind him already. It's impossible to turn back.
She wouldn't want you anyway… whispers a voice in his head. Have you forgotten already, you stupid old dog? 'Let me go', she said. 'You're scaring me', she said. Did you really think she would go with a monster like you?
A quiet voice, soft even, but cold and mocking like a mirror. He knows it well, this voice. It's his steady companion and no matter how loud he shouts, how much he pleads, it won't leave him alone. He has learned to ignore it, but tonight it's too strong, too powerful for him. It rises from the darkest depths of his mind where he has banned it and laughs at him.
Rage and Fear are doing battle in his chest and he lets them, so they might drown out the voice and kill the disappointment that has crept into his heart, just like she did. He was careful, so very careful, to lock it away all those years ago, that he was convinced he did not even have one. He's a murderer, a ruthless killer. He has slaughtered men and child alike for many years. He would still do. Hell, he is, cutting down everything that is too slow to make way for him, as he hurries towards the gate. But her…
The Gate of the Gods appears before him, its guards long slain and buried in the mud at Stranger's feet. They are past them in less than a heartbeat and suddenly the path is free and the horse has finally room to run, really run.
They leave it all behind, the fires, the screams, the battle. This goddamn city with its blasted liars. The Little Bird and her true knights. Everything.
But deep down he knows that that ain't true. Tomorrow, when he is finally away and terror and fury have tired each other out, the voice will still be there. Unscathed. Cold and mocking like a mirror.
A/N: Hi there^^ Me again with another Oneshot, this time from Sandor's perspective, during the Blackwater.
so far these are all byproducts of a longer fic i'm working on, which probably will take a while still (want to have it complete before uploading).
Critique is always welcomed, see you around, Mag.
BTW:
The title is a quote by William Shakespeare, the lyrics beneath from the Song "Into the Fire" by Disturbed...
ASoIaF and all its characters belong to George R.R. Martin
See ya soon, Mag~