Yuki's eyes flickered open. He smiled up at Tohru from where he lay on her lap. She was watching him closely, her fingers ever so lightly stroking the hair at the nape of his neck.

They had practiced reading and writing already, and Yuki had painstakingly written 'thank you for teaching me' and 'your beautifull', which Tohru gently corrected the spelling of. But... there was something else he wanted to say. Something he had known for a while...

"I think... I love you."

Surprisingly, it wasn't hard to say the words. They formed naturally and sounded so true, so right. Tohru's large eyes widened slightly, but she smiled.

"I think... I love you too" she said, imitating the stilted way he had spoken. He smiled, embarrassed but pleased. "Really," she emphasised, "I do."

There was so much wrong with their situation... how could they have a future when he was here? How could he have dragged her into his dark world...? But in that moment it felt like everything was slotting into place, a perfect jigsaw.

As they strolled to the gate that evening, Yuki steered Tohru further into the gardens. He picked an orange tea rose and presented it to her with a small bow.

"It is a very important tradition, Madam," he intoned with mock seriousness.

She kissed him on the cheek as she took it. "Thank you, kind Sir."

When they reached the gate there was the usual pause between them. They both seemed to have been expecting it because they smirked sadly to see the other's expression.

"Remember," Tohru said, "We say 'see you soon'."

Yuki nodded. "We don't do goodbyes," he agreed. He watched her leave with a final wave which was simultaneously happy and sad. Then he turned to go inside, his mind full of Tohru. I love you too... I love you too...Really I do... She loved him!

.

In the shadow of the building, Akito closed his eyes, as though this would somehow subdue the fury raging within him. It did not.

He had cancelled all engagements for the day to confirm Yuki's betrayal for himself. And now he knew.

His anger was lava spreading through his body, and nothing could withstand it. Yuki would pay.

Akito rose from where he had been crouched watching the couple as they conversed and touched and betrayed him. After everything he had done for that unwanted brat... He went to make arrangements, and to find Yuki.

.

Yuki sat on the edge of Akito's bed. He had vague notions of getting dressed for the evening, and he knew he had to go have dinner because Tohru had told him he must try to eat regularly. But... right now his body was content to be still, his mind replaying the happy memories of the afternoon. I love you too... And the way she had casually kissed his cheek, like a real couple... like a couple from the films Kagura was always watching...

He didn't even immediately notice when Akito entered.

Then he saw him and made to rise, to hurry and dress, but suddenly Akito was shouting and there was a hard fist pounding into the tender side of his head and there was pain and noise and he was falling back on the bed. His body reacted instinctively to spring away from the attack but Akito followed and his punches and kicks rained down upon Yuki's thin frame. Akito was shouting and Yuki watched as though in slow-motion as the spittle sprayed from his lips. He felt pain and confusion and fear and anger. But he said nothing, and he did nothing.

And suddenly Akito stopped. Squinting through an injured eye Yuki saw him panting. He looked deranged as he suddenly rushed into Yuki's small room. Yuki's body was heaving and tender, overly sensitive. He realised he was trembling when he tried to raise himself from the bed. But it was a blow greater than any he had received when he saw his notebook clutched violently in Akito's hands.

He knew.

He knew and it was all over.

Akito threw the notebook at Yuki. It hit his chest with a dull thud.

"There's your damn learning, you traitor! You sneaky, sneaky horrid little parasite!"

He hit Yuki with the notebook several times but he barely felt it. His mind was reeling. Tohru... Did Akito know about her?

Akito began tearing the pages of the notebook, peeling long strips of paper from it and further shredding them into confetti. He scattered these around Yuki and they fluttered to the bed looking strangely peaceful, like a first snow. Akito took a strip of the notebook, crumpled it in his fist and shoved it roughly into Yuki's mouth. Manipulating his jaw he forced Yuki to chew his work.

Yuki complied. Please let this be all he knows about... please... But Yuki's life was not one favoured with good luck.

"That girl!" Akito hissed. "You and her!" He shook his head, as though it were impossible to express with words the magnitude of Yuki's betrayal.

Tohru. What had he dragged her into?

"But beating never works with you, you don't care, you just take it. You don't cry or scream... and you don't learn!" Akito paused, looking thoughtful. "Perfect!" he exclaimed, and his sweet smile made Yuki's stomach clench in fear. "This will be much more fun!"

He took Yuki by the hand and led the sore and un-resisting boy out of the room and along the corridor. Yuki spat out the glob of notebook as he went. Akito stopped when they reached the entrance to the small lounge, and told the member of staff who acted as doorman to come. He did the same at the main lounge, and they continued with Akito dragging Yuki and the two men flanking them.

Yuki's fear increased with every step they took. Akito's smile was sweet and his eyes were distracted, dancing around frantically. Yuki had been such a fool. He began to resist Akito's tugging but the two staff shoved him from behind.

By the time they reached the dining room the men were holding a squirming Yuki between then. Akito smiled back at him as he strode into the room. All heads turned to him. "Perfect" he purred again. Yuki couldn't remember seeing Akito smiling so much; it was terrifying.

Yuki was shoved into the room and Haru, Kyo, Kagura, Hiro and Ritsu stared at him. He felt something trickle from his nose and tasted the blood on his lips.

"Because you care so damn much about those useless kids, this will be more effective." Akito stopped when he was standing behind Hiro's seat. He stroked the boy's hair and Yuki felt the panic bloom in his stomach like poison. No no no. He tried to move forwards but the hold on his arms tightened.

"What's going on Akito?" Haru asked, his voice tight and terse with anxiety and suspicion.

"Oh nothing, nothing," Akito hummed happily. He spoke quieter now, to the boy trapped beneath him. "Yuki has been rather naughty Hiro, so I have to punish you. It's the only way. But you must remember, Yuki did this to you."

He shoved Hiro forward suddenly. His head hit the table with a sickening thud.

"NO!" Yuki's scream wrenched itself from his body but Akito paid no notice. Haru and Kyo sprang forward towards Akito but he stopped them with a look.

"Tell me gentlemen, how long do you wish to remain at the charming Sohma Estate? Kyo you're nineteen... your contract will change to part-time in two years. Haru your's switches in three... Do you really want to lengthen your stay so much that you would disobey me?" His voice was calm and gentle, suave in its confidence.

Both stopped with a slight glance at the other. Yuki could see a muscle jumping in Haru's jaw.

Akito called through the hatch into the kitchen. "Send more staff here. Now."

Within a minute a further two men and two women were gathered in the dining room.

"Keep an eye on those two." Akito said, indicating to Haru and Kyo.

Yuki was panting, struggling against the powerful restraints on his arms. His eye throbbed painfully. Ritsu had slipped quickly and quietly from the room without Yuki noticing. Kagura was sitting motionless, pale-faced and wide-eyed.

Akito still held the back of Hiro's neck and he was whimpering slightly in fear.

"I knew this would be fun." Akito smiled. "Now just stay still my dear."

He fiercely slapped Hiro's face. The boy's head whipped to the side. In an instant Akito slapped it back. He hit him, again and again until Hiro was sobbing. When he brought his hands up to protect his head Akito tipped the chair back, sending him sprawling to the floor.

"Don't do this Akito, please! Akito. Stop! I'm right here, hurt me!" Yuki screamed until he was hoarse, but this was precisely what Akito wanted to hear.

Akito kicked the struggling form on the floor, and Yuki felt every blow tenfold, as though he were the one receiving them. Akito seemed to know this from the way he smiled at Yuki as he kicked Hiro.

"Are you enjoying the show Yuki?" he called cheerfully. "Though..." he paused for a moment with a tilt of the head and a sardonic smirk, "Maybe this excites you? Hmm? Did you play rough with that girl Yuki? Naughty little games?" He laughed as Yuki struggled.

Akito bent to the floor and cupped Hiro's face in his hands. His face was flushed and tear-streaked and blood trickled from the corner of his mouth. Akito lightly stroked his trembling head.

"Oh but he looks so good like this. Disheveled, wretched. It's a good look for him, I think clients will really go for that. Perhaps some of your clients Haru...?" Akito dragged his finger tortuously slowly across Hiro's lips and Haru snapped. With an animal roar he charged forward. Three of the staff grabbed him before he reached Akito. With great difficulty they restrained him. He struggled desperately between them, curses flowing from between his clenched teeth.

"Oh Haru, you have always been amusing." Akito smiled sweetly, "I'm going to make sure sure some really sick fucker gets you tonight."

He turned to Yuki once more. He was no longer struggling. He met Akito's eyes quite evenly, despite the whirlpool of emotion in his gut.

"Look what you've done Yuki. Look at poor Hiro. Isn't it just sinful?"

Yuki looked at Hiro, but the expression of pain and confusion and betrayal on the boy's face sent a stab of guilt right through him. He looked away.

This couldn't be happening. How could he have been so stupid? What had he done? What had he done?

"Don't look away." Akito was suddenly in front of him, holding his throat and forcing him to look at Hiro. "Look at what you have done Yuki. Feel it. Remember it."

Yuki struggled for air against the hand which squeezed his throat, and he looked at Hiro. He saw it, he felt it... and he would always remember it.

Akito's breath tickled his cheek as he whispered in his ear. "This is my justice." Yuki struggled to breathe. He couldn't move, pinned as he was, so he could only stare into Akito's burning eyes.

"Ahh, well this really is very enjoyable, but we must not forget that our dear clients will arrive soon." Akito sounded regretful. He released Yuki's throat and he drew in a long painful breath. "I think, now it is time for you to go for some much-needed solitary time in your special room Yuki."

Fear and panic flooded every corner of Yuki's mind, smothering all reasonable thought. Solitary... solitary. He couldn't- he couldn't go back there! He couldn't. He wouldn't. The darkness and the quiet and the stillness and the poisonous thoughts which infected his every second- he couldn't go back there!

"I won't! I won't go back!" he heard himself screaming, as though from a great distance.

He struggled viciously with a renewed vigor; fear lent his body a ferocious strength. He fought against the men holding him and was succeeding in escaping when Akito ordered two more staff to assist. The many cruel, rough hands were dragging Yuki's writhing body from the room, and he was almost powerless, but still he fought and shouted, struggling every inch they moved.

Tohru. How would he protect her? He could not go back to solitary! No no no!

"Stop." Akito's calm voice cut through the room like a knife.

The staff stopped dragging Yuki but he continued to struggle, desperate to be free. Every fibre of his being was screaming against this.

"Let him go."

These words inspired a ray of hope which was dazzling and he met it as a drowning man would a life raft. The staff released him and he staggered to find himself free, with no force to fight against anymore.

Then he realised the raft was a trap, disguising the waterfall he was about to tumble over.

"I've thought of an even better idea." Akito continued. "Hmm, Haru... Kyo, you will escort Yuki to solitary. That's much more fun."

Yuki felt all the energy drain from him at these words. Neither Haru nor Kyo moved. Akito seemed unsurprised for he smiled sweetly.

"Haru and Kyo will escort Yuki. And Yuki will put himself in solitary... or Hiro here will be replacing Yuki with the clients tonight." Akito shrugged, as though the outcome of their decision didn't matter to him.

"He's thirteen Akito!" Haru shouted.

"Mmm yes, it really is sinful isn't it? And some clients I know would just love that..." He smirked at Yuki. And Yuki understood he was looking at a being of pure evil.

He sagged in defeat, his body felt heavy and his bones felt old and tired. There was no choice. He turned resignedly for the door. Haru and Kyo appeared slowly at his sides. He walked now without them needing to hold him, for all the fight had left him. He saw the same thing in Haru. He was no longer furious, he just looked... tired.

Akito seemed pleased. "Escort them" he instructed the staff.

"You know where to go my sweet," he cooed at Yuki.

This was cruel. This was so cruel. With each step he took alarms sounded in his mind and his instinct told him to run... but he thought of Hiro, and managed another tortuous step towards Hell.

"That bastard!" Haru spat, and Yuki sensed he was close to snapping once more. "That sick bastard, using Hiro like that!" Yuki couldn't disagree with him.

"It's Yuki's fault!" Kyo hissed, "He knew it was dangerous and he still did it- and now Hiro's taken the beating for it!" And Yuki couldn't disagree with him either.

But there was one thing he had to do, one thing he had to ask... though he deserved nothing from them. He turned to Haru.

"Please, you have to make sure he doesn't get to Tohru!" He spoke in a frantic whisper, so the staff following a short distance behind would not hear. Haru looked confused.

"Ayame is out, please- please ask him to go to the Vets and tell Tohru- tell her not to come here ever again." Haru didn't respond, but Kyo muttered bitterly, "Seems like everyone's doing things for you nowadays Yuki."

"It isn't for me!" Yuki snapped. He was getting desperate now, and they were getting close to the room. He had to protect Tohru.

"Akito will be waiting for her to return, it will be an elaborate trap. Tell Ayame what's happened. Tell him this is the only thing I'll ever ask of him, as a brother!" Haru eventually nodded. Yuki sensed Kyo scowling in his peripheral vision but he ignored him; his entire attention was now focused on imploring Haru.

"She can't ever come here again, Akito will be waiting. Don't let him find out who she is, anything about her!" Haru nodded as they walked. Yuki's chest constricted in fear. They were almost there...

"Never. She can never return! You have to protect her because... because I won't be able to" His voice hitched for the first time and he felt a sickening thick lump form in his throat.

"And tell her I'm sorry. And Hiro... tell him I'm so sorry."

He was surprised to find he had stopped moving. Focusing once more he could see the door mere metres away. His special room. His breathing was laboured and painful. His head was pounding. His pulse was racing. The lump in his throat was huge. He felt sick.

He tried desperately to take a step forward but his body wasn't responding.

Move. You have to move. To save Hiro.

His lips trembled pitifully, and he felt tears trace their way down his cheeks. Trembling, he turned to Haru again.

"I know I'm asking too much, but you'll have to help me... I don't think I can move." He saw the pity in Haru's face and despised it because he knew he didn't deserve it.

Gently Haru took one arm and Kyo took the other. They slowly supported Yuki to the door. He reached out a trembling hand and slid it open. He stared into the darkness for a few moments, unable to move.

"Please?" he murmured, and they understood because as one they pushed him into the room.

He turned to face them. "Tohru?" he asked.

Haru nodded. "I will" he confirmed.

They looked miserable, hopeless, pitying. Yuki was sure he was a truly weak and disgusting sight. The three stared at each other for a long moment.

It was one of the hardest things Yuki had done to voluntarily turn away from them... from freedom. But he did.

The door closed behind him and he was left in darkness, in silence. He had spent too much time here as a child... and then that agonizing, uninterrupted month when he was sixteen, after his first client. He had thought, hoped, prayed that he would never be back here... yet here he was.

He crumpled to the ground, feeling suddenly exhausted and weightless. It didn't hurt when he hit the floor, as though his internal pain cushioned the blow.

"Thank you." he whispered into the emptiness, "Thank you."

He lay shivering on the cold hard floor, sobbing silently into the darkness.

And he knew that he would never see Tohru again.

He hoped Haru and Ayame would do what he had asked. He prayed she would be safe, living in the light.

And he would never see her again.

The sky... the garden... Tohru... how desperately he wanted them in that moment.

The darkness and the cold seeped into his body, reaching his heart. He realised all the years he had been chasing numbness, he had been wrong. He didn't want to be numb. He wanted to feel. To live.

But it was too late now.

And the numbness... the emptiness... took over him, casting an impenetrable shadow over all the light of his soul.

.

Sorry Yuki!

Thank you to everyone reading, and thank you to the guest reviewer on my last chapter :)