Chapter Three: Let's Leave Looserville

BANG!

Tat, tat, tat, tat.

Clack, clack, clack. Clack, clack, clack.

THUMP!

BOOM!

Tat, tat, tat.

Gaz deftly maneuvered her character through the warzone that was Vampire Piggy Infinity: Invasion of Piggsla. Heavy duty weapons fire was traded between her gothic commando and the elite shock troops of the vampire piggy army.

An explosion went off nearby and her character twisted out of the way and behind the shattered remains of a wall just as pink gunfire slammed into the dirt beside her. Gaz deftly mashed buttons on her Game Slave V and unloaded a string of bullets, grenades, and fire from her multi-platform assault rifle.

The skirmish lasted only a few moments as Gaz mowed down her opponents, splattering her handheld's screen with thick red blood and piggy gore. She avoided more heavy weapons fire and used a rocket launcher stolen from a dead foe to blow apart an assault tank and the troop carriers it was escorting. The carnage only increased her slaughter score—which had started to max out the counter in the upper left corner of the screen—and Gaz felt the slightest hint of a smile fight to appear at her unusually good game.

"Gaz!"

Dib's drunken—and most likely stoned—voice broke Gaz from the zone and her character was hit by indirect fire—also known as a mortar round—from the piggy army. The vampiric creatures wasted no time in blasting away at her disoriented character.

Gaz was a good gamer—some would argue a god among the other digital addicts—but even she couldn't save herself in such a situation. Her commando took a dozen vegetarian rounds to the chest and a grenade went off before she could even think to dodge. Her now legless character was then captured, dragged off, and summarily executed by a large industrial frying pan.

Death by meltation.

"Dib." Gaz's voice was pure steel and even in his intoxicated state, her brother knew to run.

"OH SHI-"

WHAM!

Gaz was smaller than her brother and he had certainly bulked up throughout his college years, but none of that cushioned the blow he got as she slammed into him and let loose a bloody string of punches that made his face likewise very bloody.

"I-"

WHAM!

THUNK!

"WAS-"

WHAM!

THUNK!

"WINNING!"

WHAM!

WHAM!

Gaz continued to wail on her brother like a hellion unleashed as she thumped his head into the hard wooden floor in an almost cartoon-like fashion. Dib quickly lost consciousness, but Gaz didn't stop until the red left her vision.

Sadly for Dib, the red didn't leave him.

Her dooming done, Gaz got up and headed for the exit.

"Should we stop her?"

"Should we call the police?"

"This is the worst birthday party ever."

Gaz ignored her brother's friends and slammed the door with a viscous bang.

It had been two years since she had broken up with Iggins. The waste of male genetics had survived somehow and had been admitted to the hospital for two completely shattered legs, a shattered hand, and multiple burns ranging from first to third degree. His "accident" had made national news—the idiot at least had enough brains to not rat on her to the authorities—and through it Gaz had learned that Iggins would be in a wheel chair for the rest of his life.

She figured two amputations, a dozen surgeries, and permanent skin damage would have to suffice for destroying her heart.

Gaz had quickly retreated to her haven of handheld gaming. The world was quickly shut out and time flew by. Within what felt like a week—but was really several months—she had graduated and left the realm of schooling.

Or so she thought.

Gaz had started attending—begrudgingly and at the request of her father—a nearby university and was majoring in video game design and economics. When Dib had questioned her on her second choice, Gaz had replied that the best way to cause someone misery would be to screw them financially. He had wisely stayed on her good side after that—for the most part.

Now he had screwed up and would most likely need a helivac and some serious surgery.

Serves him right for messing with her game.

Sighing, Gaz withdrew her game slave...only to realize she had left it on the floor back at the frat house that Dib had been having his birthday party.

The world froze and Gaz felt her chest tighten in stunned shock.

"Hey."

Gaz turned in surprise—her reflexes slow due to her shock—to see a face she had not seen in years.

He hadn't changed much since she had last seen him. He had bulked up like Dib had, his clothes were still the same minus the jacket. He had exchanged that for an equally faded hoodie. His hair was slightly longer and a little wilder, but his eyes were still that captivating red.

"You left this at the Dib-stinks," he said, his accent more prominent now that he was saying more than just one word.

He had saved her game.

"Th-thank...you..."

"You are most welcome."

Gaz stared at the boy.

The boy stared at Gaz.

An awkward silence passed between the two.

"What's your name?" Gaz asked quickly just as the boy asked her the same question. They both blushed faintly and dull onyx locked with bright ruby.

"Gaz."

"Zim."

They blushed brighter as they once again spoke at the same time.

"Thank you...Zim," Gaz said slowly, her face still as red as Zim's eyes, "for bringing me this."

"It was no problem...it seemed to be of great value to you...I-"

A high pitched jingle interrupted Zim's awkward vocal stumbling and the raven haired man quickly pulled out his cell phone and answered it.

"Hello? The Dib-stink? The hell?" Zim said in shock as he quickly conversed in a hushed tone with whoever was on the other end of the phone call. Gaz watched closely as his features shifted from confusion to surprise to understanding.

"What was that about?" Gaz asked after the conversation ended and Zim hung up.

"Oh...I'm afraid your brother has been admitted to the emergency wing of the general hospital."

"Cool."

"You're okay with his hospitalization?" Zim asked, incredulous as he watched her start up her Game Slave and restart the level her brother had ruined for her. Operation Bacon Drive would be won this time around.

"Duh."

Zim smiled, "I think we could become friends."

Gaz's game erupted in chaos as her character ran the tank it was driving into a building and detonated in a fireball. Her face was frozen. Her hands still.

"Would you like to go for a walk?" Zim asked as he stuff his hands in his pockets and began to walk off.

Flashes of Iggins and her in the first year of their relationship flashed before her. Gaz squashed them and steeled herself. She was her own master. Not that loser.

Never again would she allow her life to be affected by someone else.

"Sure," Gaz said, ignoring the fear and uncertainty filling her stomach up as she shut down her game—something she had never done for Iggins or anyone else for that matter—and followed after the black haired man.

"So what is so great about that game?" Zim asked as they walked down the sidewalk into the thicker parts of the city. Neon signs and loud noises rapidly replaced the urban environment and soft rustle of leaves.

"It's my life." Gaz said simply, shrugging.

"I see..."

"What do you like to do?" Gaz asked, unsure.

"I like to do many things. I destroy things. I build things. I...uh...I destroy things?"

Gaz felt a small smile splay over her features. "So you destroy things and build things?"

"Not necessarily in that order..."

"Hmp."

Another awkward silence passed between them.

"I also dabble in finance," Zim said, uneasily trying to keep the conversation alive, but also clearly lacking in the ability to do so.

"Really?" Gaz asked, her interest peaked, "I'm majoring in economics."

"I know," Zim said, a blush returning to his features, "you're in my class...you sit back left, right?"

Gaz felt her own features darken in another blush, "yeah...you're in my class?"

"I sit back right."

Twenty chairs had existed between them for the past two years and Gaz had never even realized it. This led her to wonder how Zim had.

"Small world."

"Yeah..."

Another awkward silence and Gaz wondered what to do. She wasn't exactly warmed up in the area of conversation any more—if the few, though emotional, conversations with Dib or Iggins counted—and yet she wanted to somehow keep talking to Zim.

"Would it be alright if I tried your game?"

"Not on your life."

Some things just didn't happen.

"Oh...may I play with you then?" Zim said uneasily, he was obviously wracking his mind with ways to keep Gaz talking to him. Huh.

"You have a Game Slave?" Gaz asked in surprise.

"Well...no." Zim noticed the confused look on Gaz's face and hurriedly continued, "I can purchase one though!"

"You'd just buy the handheld and the game for a match with me?" Gaz asked, somewhat stunned by his offer.

"Well...no." Zim said, but he was smiling.

Gaz had a feeling she was going to like this guy.

The thought scared her.

It was nearly midnight, but that didn't stop the Game Emporium. For whatever reason, the store managers had decided to make the rundown and dying business a twenty four hour facility. There was little thought put into the idea and even less money. The small building—the grand name was misleading—was only staffed by one employee and he normally slept for the entire shift because no one came to buy anything during normal working hours, much less at midnight.

It was just his luck that someone had shown up when he was asleep. It was also just his luck that they weren't there to buy anything.

CRASH!

Zim and Gaz—both smiling ear to ear—busted into the store with hoods drawn over their features and guns held high. The clerk awoke in a daze, but he was awake instantly at the sight of two armed thugs. Awake and frozen to the spot, in a desperate need of a change of underwear. And shoes.

Gaz quickly found a new Game Slave V and a half dozen games on the shelves nearby. She made sure she had a copy of The Invasion of Piggsla before signaling Zim. The two left the store through the same busted window they had gone through—Zim apparently had a thematic thing—and were out of sight before the clerk could even reach for the phone.

The clerk looked at the busted window and the near five hundred dollars worth of merchandise now missing from the store and contemplated his options. He could call the police and they would probably find the punks that had just robbed him, but that would mean investigations and questions being asked. His bosses would easily see that he had been sleeping—they would probably check all the past recordings and see the same thing—and he would probably be fired.

Or, he could call a window-repairman and alter the store records to show that the games and the console had never been apart of their inventory.

The clerk dialed the window guy.

BOOM!

Tat, tat, tat, tat.

"Die piggy scum!" Zim roared as his commando unleashed hellish destruction upon Piggsla's main camp. His character was piloting a Sky Master—a massive airship that contained an entire armory's worth of weapons—and through its heavy cannons and gatling guns he was slaughtering vampire pigs left and right.

Gaz could only agree in silence as she slipped deeper into the zone. Her own character was weaving in and out of the camp proper, hunting for Piggsla. The massive vampire pig was running around in panic, issuing out orders to his troops in a vain attempt at turning the battle for the better.

"You!" Piggsla roared over the Game Slave's speakers as he caught sight of Gaz's character.

"Time to become bacon!" Gaz said alongside her character's voice actor as she unleashed a string of weapons fire while Zim destroyed the area around her. The boss pig laughed as he dodged the bullets and grenades, only to scream in horror as flames licked at his limbs.

"Nooooo!" Piggsla cried as one of his small arms became crispy bacon before he furiously drew his sidearm and aimed it at Gaz. "You will pay!"

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Gaz dove for cover; however, a round clipped her in the thigh and she watched in horror as her animated commando crashed to the ground in pain.

"Now to finish you...what the?" Piggsla stopped his advance on Gaz and looked up in horror.

Zim had piloted the Sky Master straight at the massive vampire pig.

"AHAHAHAHAHA!" Zim laughed manically as he dove from the aircraft and rolled effortlessly across the ground while the massive pig was frozen to the spot in horror.

The Sky Master bashed into Piggsla and then through several buildings and tents before coming to stop by the tank depot. The massive assault tanks were situated right next to a massive fuel dump and ammo facility.

"Would you like to do the honors?" Zim asked Gaz in reality as his character dropped a rocket launcher for her own character to pick up.

Gaz was glowing with joy, "Oh definitely."

Her commando picked up the heavy, single-shot weapon and aimed at the plane wreck.

"NO!" Piggsla cried in terror, still alive somehow—for whatever reason, game bosses still had unbelievably high life points—as he struggled to free himself.

Gaz grinned cruelly and fired her weapon. The missile soared right at the wreckage and Piggsla...well the massive pig squealed.

BOOOOM!

Both Zim and Gaz's screens ignited in bright light as the plane exploded. Then the ammo dump exploded. Then the tanks exploded. Then the fuel dump exploded.

Then Piggsla exploded.

Gore and smoke smothered their screens.

"That was awesome!" Zim cried victoriously as he thrust both of his fists in the air and stood up from his spot at the picnic table the two had been sitting at. The park was deserted, but that was expected at four in the morning.

Gaz couldn't help but agree as a beep went off and NEW flashed across the screen as the game was replaced by a high score background. Gaz's previous plays had all been individual, but her score alone was higher when she had played with Zim than most of her other games put together.

Now that was some serious gaming.

"You did pretty well for the first time."

Gaz couldn't help but smile when Zim smiled. He had an infectious happiness like that.

"Are there more games?" Zim asked, both curious and hungry for more digital destruction. Gaz felt like a proud member of the gaming community upon hearing his question.

"Vampire Piggy Trinity: Dawn of the Unsizzled comes out in a month," Gaz said with the slightest bit of anticipation seeping through her characteristically cool persona.

"We will destroy that game as well?" Zim asked hopefully.

"Of course." Gaz had a true smile on her face now. The idea of playing with Zim again on an even better—and more co-opt minded—game was exciting to the goth.

"Victory for Zim!"

"Huh?"

"I mean...uh...cool."

They had gone back to Zim's because he lived closer than Dib and Gaz's shared apartment on the other side of town. The flat was pretty nice, despite Zim living alone. It had a weird paint job, but the inside was loaded with computers and flat-screens. The kitchen was pretty state of the art, but it oddly enough had a toilet located out in the open by the microwave.

"The designer was a bit...off..." Zim said when Gaz gave him a questioning look.

"Eh...Dib tried to put a teleporter to big-foot's layer in our garage once."

"That wasn't his best idea," Zim lamented with a face palm, "I remember it took him weeks just to get the ash from the fire out of his disgusting hair." Zim chuckled slightly at the memory and Gaz could only smirk at the memory herself.

"That was pretty great," Gaz said with a small giggle.

"You have a nice laugh," Zim complimented as something fluffy bolted out of a doorway and ran towards the two.

Gaz flushed bright red, but before anything could be said about that comment, something tackled her.

"Gah!" She cried as a small terrier began to lick and kiss her face furiously while yelping excitedly.

"Gir! Down Gir!" Zim roared and tried to pry the creature off of his purple haired...friend.

Gir, the small dog from hell, was finally coerced off Gaz and thrown outside. The dog immediately lost interest and trotted off to find a new plaything, having completely forgotten about Gaz.

"What...was that?" Gaz asked in soft surprise.

"Gir." Zim said simply as he opened a cabinet, "he'll probably destroy a vending machine or two before the morning rolls around and I have to drag him back here."

Gaz could tell he wasn't joking.

"Care to join me for a drink? I know I'm going to need one."

Gaz contemplated that. She wasn't big on alcohol simply because it generally involved being social with others in order to obtain some—she was still twenty after all—and most of it was cheap and therefore rather terrible tasting.

"What do you have?" She asked, trying to at least humor the guy.

"Everything." Zim said, gesturing at a door near the toilet. "I'll be having a bottle of vodka if you want it."

"What kind of vodka?" Gaz asked curiously. She had tried that particular substance once before and found it to be very good.

"Twenty seven different mixtures."

He wasn't kidding about having everything.

"I'll take straight."

Zim nodded and began to make them both drinks. Gaz went into the living room—which had a rather disturbing picture of a monkey hanging on the wall above the largest sofa Gaz had ever seen—and sat down and turned on the tv.

Zim came in a few minutes later and offered her a large glass—he himself had a bottle of the stuff—of vodka.

"What are you watching?"

"Static..."

"."

Gaz blushed and changed the channel.

They flipped through a number of channels and finally settled on a blow-out movie that they spent the next several hours laughing at. The effects were cheesy, the actors fake, and the alcohol only made the whole thing all the more hilarious.

"You...you know," Zim said a few hours later—it was almost daybreak—as the movie ended, "you have the most amazing hair."

Gaz felt her face warm.

"My hair...uh...it...it...isn't that great..." it was true, her hair was purple for crying out loud. Who would think that was amazing. Most called her a freak or an attention-whore. She was not used to the opposite being said.

"I think you're beautiful."

Zim sounded so sober that Gaz knew it wasn't the alcohol making him say that. She also knew that they had gotten a lot closer together by the end of the movie then they had when it had started. His face was practically touching hers.

Her chest tightened.

Zim leaned forward, cupped her face tenderly, and kissed her.