Chapter9

Jane woke early the next morning to the slight movements of Maura fidgeting. She slowly opened one eye, peeking through the morning's bright sunrays to check on the body sleeping next to her. Maura's back was turned to Jane, she was unable to see if the medical examiner was awake or not. "Maura?" Jane whispered in a hushed tone.

"I'm awake, Jane." Maura said rolling over to face Jane. "I was just thinking."

"Hmm." Jane mumbled. "What could you possibly be thinking about this early?"

"I think I need more time to think about that."

Jane's eyes opened wide as she was caught guard in mid stretch at Maura's statement. "What does that even mean?"

"It means... " Maura started. "That we should get up, get dressed, and have some breakfast."

Jane continued to stare at her as Maura rolled out of bed and made her way to the bathroom. She was tempted to close her eyes and try to sleep for an extra five minutes when she heard Maura shout from the bathroom. "Don't fall back asleep Jane!"

Jane slowly pulled herself up and rubbed her eyes. She sighed as she lifted the rest of her body up from the edge of the bed and made her way down the hall to the guest bathroom. She flicked on the lights and took a brief moment to stare at her reflection in the mirror, groaning at what she saw. Jane hopped in the shower, letting the hot water cascade over her skin. She ran her fingers through her hair, lathering in the shampoo. The detective had made a habit of letting her showers become her sanctuary of thoughts. She always did her best thinking when she could hear the water droplets hit the ground around her. It was the same reason she loved rainy days. She thought about the case. She thought of Maura. She knew she needed to protect Maura. Jane let her body soak under the faucet for a few more minutes before she turned off the water and climbed out of the shower.

When Jane entered the kitchen, she was surprised to see Maura already cooking breakfast. "Uh that was fast."

"You were actually slow." Maura countered, placing a plate of eggs and bacon in front of Jane. "That was a 45 minute shower, Jane. Did you enjoy yourself?"

"What? No!" Jane snapped, taking a bite of her eggs. "I was just thinking."

"Oh. You told me it was too early for thinking." Maura commented.

"I was thinking about the case. Sometimes I lose track of time in the shower." Jane explained as she sipped her coffee that Maura had prepared for her. "Which reminds me, what were you thinking about in bed?"

Maura stopped moving around the kitchen and focused solely on Jane. Her hazel eyes locked onto Jane's. She tried to decipher Jane's thoughts as she started speaking. "Jane, you love me, right?"

"Of course, Maur'" Jane said quickly.

"…. And we are best friends?"

"Yes, no matter what. You will always be my closest friend Maura. Are you ok? Did I say something that would make you think otherwise?" Jane asked.

"No. I just don't want to lose you." Maura clarified.

Jane looked at her quizzically. "Why would you lose me Mau…. " Jane didn't have time to finish her question before she was caught off guard. Maura's hands grasped Jane's face as their lips crashed together. Maura felt out of breath as her lips pressed gently to Jane's. Jane pulled back from the kiss and stared at Maura. Her eyes gave away nothing to Maura. Maura stared back at Jane, wondering if maybe she had read all of the signs wrong.

"Jane…" Maura started. "I'm sorry. I thought you knew. I thought you always knew I've loved you." Jane stayed completely still. "The innocent flirting, the constant touching. I just thought… I'm sorry. Maybe I just, I'm not so good at socializing. I may have misinterpreted the meaning of it." Maura began stuttering trying to explain herself to the woman that stood motionless and silent in front of her. "I've never had a best friend. I don't know if that is normal in a friendship." Maura paused, waiting for Jane to speak.

"Could you just say something?" Maura demanded, growing impatient at Jane's unusual silence.

"I have to go." Jane said as she headed towards the door.

"It's Saturday, Jane." Maura tried to stop her.

"I think I might have a lead on this case." Jane rushed out of the door without hesitation. She didn't think about what Maura would think if she left her like this.

The door slammed behind Jane. She felt like she was on autopilot. She had no idea what just happened. She just had to keep moving before her brain caught up to her body. She had no time to think or dwell on the fact that her best friend just kissed her. She didn't want to start interpreting what that might mean. She had accepted that she loved Maura, but it would be impossible to accept that Maura may love her as well. She had never allowed herself to imagine anything outside of a friendship with Maura. She only silently loved her, that was always enough. She had only wanted to love her in the comfort of her own mind.

Jane climbed into her car and slammed the shifter in reverse, pulling out of Maura's driveway. Cavanaugh didn't want her to jeopardize the case that they had built against Paddy, but Jane had no choice. She needed to protect Maura. There was only one man that she knew had ears all over Boston. Paddy Doyle would have more information then they had uncovered on this case. Paddy Doyle had protected Maura before and he would do the same now, even from inside of prison. Jane turned off her phone before heading to Massachusetts Correctional Institution. She needed answers and she would be damned if she needed anyone trying to stop her. Her phone would only slow her down.