Chapter 17: November 28th

How dare Naruto fucking do that to me. How dare he- after HE was the one who asked to be in this relationship- make me feel like there is someone else in his life more important to me?! I have never even remotely made him feel that way, it's only been three days and he's already insinuating that he doesn't want me anymore!

What the fuck?

Is it because I'm too much of a prick? I reiterate, it's been three fucking days and he expects me to try and change who I am with a snap of the fingers? Yeah right.

I understand that he cares about Sakura. I understand that they're friends, and I don't care about that, Naruto can be friends with whoever he wants to. But I also know about Sakura and her reputation, which I also thought Naruto knew about. If he does, I have no idea how he can continue to put her on a pedestal like that. Sakura has wanted me since day one of Team 7 and it's always been that way. Naruto knows she's going to hate him way more than she could ever hate me, and that she'll probably start spewing out extremely nasty things to him.

Part of me... doesn't want to see Naruto get hurt. I don't want him to hear those malicious things thrown in his face.

But hell, what should I fucking care anyway? He's choosing Sakura! He already proved to me that she's more important by saying that he'd rather pretend I don't exist when she's around. Not that I'd ever tell him this, but that really... stung. It hurt me.

I never thought of Naruto as that kind of person. I always thought I was the prick, and now I don't know what to do.

It's only been two hours. Two hours since I kicked him out of my house, and I'm already worried. What if he doesn't come back? It hurts because he was the first and only one I ever tried to open my heart to. The only person that ever made me feel the way I do around him, and he just stepped on it. He stepped all over it, with his stupid obsession over that whore.

Seriously, who drugs somebody else's boyfriend so they can fuck them? Okay, there are a few things wrong there. First of all, who in their right mind would drug someone with those kinds of intentions? Second of all, he was already dating someone. And I truly... felt really bad for Kiba then.

And I actually somewhat felt for Shikamaru too. He may have wanted to repair the relationship they had, may have felt guilty or tried apologizing for what he did with Hana... but Sakura had completely decimated that dream. That was the first time I had ever seen any Inuzuka depressed.

I don't want my relationship with Naruto to turn into a dream. I don't want it to turn into something I can never have again. But if he can't prove to me that I'm more important than Sakura, there's nothing I can do.

Heh. Hey, maybe Nara had a good idea when he picked up smoking.

Why does Naruto have to be so stubborn? Why does he have to crush my heart this way? Naruto... I think...I...

Author's Note: It's an early chapter! Hooray for weekends! (And the husband working late so I can do this XD) An image of off deviant art has given me a wonderful idea for the next chapter. :D

Two things: 1.) I feel like this story is losing it's edge. Less reviews, less page views... I get discouraged, but don't worry to those who like this story, I will finish it.

2.) My 3rd anniversary with my husband is the 18th, what should I get him? x.x