A/N – this is where the original story and this one diverge. As I said, I heard a lot of feedback that he forgave her too easily. I have come to agree, hence the changes. Apparently I am not the only one to write it that way, so I guess many of us just have a soft spot for Densi?

Thanks to ucialum85, Hoosier65, several guests, as well as my significant other, for making me see he needs to make her work a little harder and not enable her behavior! Not sure if any of them could foresee that I would take it beyond that. BWAA HA HA...

~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,

Chapter 5

Kensi made it to the hospital in record time, breaking several traffic laws and leaving behind more than one shaken driver. She had to flash her badge at reception in order to get his room number as she was technically not family. She raced up the stairs to the third floor, not wanting to take the time to wait for the elevator. She found his room and paused outside the door, taking a moment to prepare herself for what she might find behind it. A nurse approached her. "Are you here to see Marty, um, Detective Deeks?" she asked. Kensi turned to look at her, a familiar feeling rising in her chest, one that she fought down. That feeling was exactly what had started this whole mess. The nurse was a pretty red head who was looking at her questioningly.

"Yes, I'm here for him." The words had several levels of meaning for her at this moment.

The nurse smiled and said "He might not be awake. The doctor gave him some pain medication and he was asleep the last time I checked in on him. I'm glad someone is here for him, he's such a sweetie." She blushed and walked away. Kensi sighed; her Deeks had a way with the nurses.

Taking a deep breath, she opened the door quietly and stood in the doorway looking at him. Her heart tightened in her chest. He looked to be one large bruise, and his chest was bare, covered only by bandages wrapped tightly around his ribs. She took in the stitches on his forehead and chin. Someone had worked him over pretty good, but he was alive and she would fix this. He looked like he was asleep so she walked softly over to the chair by his bed and sat down. She reached out and pushed a lock of his hair off his forehead, careful not to touch the stitched up wound. He instantly woke up and looked at her. He smiled and his eyes lit up. She knew when the memory of their last conversation returned as the light left them, the smile gone. "What are you doing here?" he asked groggily. Her stomach cramped, it sounded like he didn't want her here or couldn't understand why she would want to be at his side.

"I'll always be here for you Deeks. I am so sorry about..." he interrupted her.

"Why, Kensi? Why would you say those things to me? You know how I feel about cheaters, how I feel about my dad. I've told you enough times. Why couldn't you have had more faith in me? Given me a chance to explain? You just saw what you wanted to see and did what you always do. You assumed the worst of me and didn't allow me my say."

She reached out to take his hand in hers, devastated when it remained limp in hers. He didn't grab her fingers like he usually did when they held hands. "You don't understand." she started.

"Then help me understand! Tell me! Let me know why you reacted like you did, how you could say those things to me. Give me a reason to forgive you, because right now, I'm not sure that I have it in me." he said.

Her heart stopped and then started beating again, hard. She had to fix this. She had hurt the one person in the world who would do anything for her, die for her, which was a very real possibility in the day to day reality of their jobs. She paused to think about what she could possibly say to make him know she was truly sorry. "I…" but just then, the rest of the team arrived, interrupting her. She had lost her chance, for the moment. They were followed shortly by Hetty and Granger.

The small room became crowded as each person crammed in; trying to reassure themselves that he was okay. Nell leaned over and kissed him on the forehead, saying "You had us worried Shaggy!"

His response of "Sorry Velma, you know I would never make my pixie worry if I could avoid it." got a chuckle from the others. A nurse came by and tried to tell them he was only allowed to have two visitors at a time but ran out of the room when seven federal badges were whipped out and shoved in her face. Deeks started to laugh but then let out a groan, as his ribs told him that was not such a good idea.

Hetty said "We'll shortly leave you to your rest Mr. Deeks but, right now, could you tell us what happened?"

"Well, you obviously know the raid went down as planned. One of the gang bangers made a break for it and I chased after him. Stupid guy went up instead of out. When he heard me behind him, he thought I was a cop and grabbed the first weapon at hand, which happened to be a lead pipe. Before I knew what was happening, he got me good in the ribs." he grimaced and ran a hand over the bandages around his midsection, the others wincing in sympathy as most of them had been where he was now. "When he realized it was Max Gentry following him, he apologized profusely and I realized my cover was still intact. Staying in character I threatened him the way Max would have. Unfortunately for me, Max's reputation is bad enough that he decided he'd have to kill me in order to avoid looking over his shoulder for the rest of his life. So, basically, he beat me senseless. At first, I tried to fight back but he'd already done significant damage to my ribs so I wasn't at my best. I have no idea why he didn't finish the job. I'm guessing that he heard other cops coming too close and headed for the hills. I'll have to check with Bates to see if LAPD managed to grab him up."

Seeing that he was starting to tire and that the pain medication was wearing off, his teammates started to leave. Kensi made no move to join the exodus and he said to her "Kensi, why don't you head out? I'm going to ask for more pain meds and I'm just going to sleep the rest of the night." He really didn't want to deal with her right now. He was in too much pain and he still had to figure out what he was going to do, if he even wanted an explanation at this point. She started to protest but Sam stepped in, having caught the look of desperation in his friend's eyes.

"Come on, Kens, let him get his rest, he needs it." and led her away. Looking back he saw the relief in Deeks's eyes. He sighed, there was a very real possibility Kensi would not be able to get Deeks to forgive what, to him, was the unforgivable. As each one left they wished him a good night, letting him know how relieved they were that he was okay.

As Granger was heading out the door, he turned back and said "Sign the damn paperwork Deeks!" Sam and Kensi turned back in surprise but Callen just sighed. He had known from the first time he worked with Deeks as Liaison Officer, that Hetty had actually wanted him for an agent but, Deeks had resisted. Right now he wasn't sure Deeks would ever sign the paperwork. Truthfully, he wasn't sure if the man he had come to think of as a brother would remain at NCIS for much longer. They would have to wait and see how it all played out. He ushered the other two agents out the door without answering their questions about what Granger meant.

Deeks closed his eyes, relieved to have peace and quiet so that he could think. He heard the door open and kept his eyes shut, hoping that, if it were Kensi returning, she would think he was asleep and leave again. When he felt cool fingers on his wrist taking his pulse, he realized it was a nurse. He opened his eyes and said "Hey Stephanie."

The red head looked at him and smiled. "Hey Marty. How are you feeling?"

He grimaced at her "Not so good. Hurt all over."

She pointed at the buttons at his side "Why don't you push the pain relief button then? It will release some medication into your I.V. and make you feel better, help you to sleep."

He looked at the button that would ease the pain but make thinking difficult. "I hate the way it makes me feel, so fuzzy and out of it." he responded.

"Is it better to lay here in pain?" she replied. Thinking about it, he realized he didn't have to make any decisions tonight and the medication would relieve the pain, both physical and mental. For a while, anyway.

He pushed the button and felt the pain start to ease almost immediately. He looked back up at Stephanie and grinned at her "Much better!" and his eyes closed as he drifted off to sleep. Stephanie finished up taking his vitals and then paused before leaving the room. She had a feeling there was something more than just the beating on the mind of the bruised and battered man in the bed. She had been in earlier to take his vitals and had had to maneuver her way to his side through all the people in the room.

The other nurse on duty had already warned her not to make a big deal out of that fact. "They're federal agents. I think they all have guns!" her colleague had whispered to her. She had been very well aware of the tall beautiful brunette stationed at his side. It was the same woman she had come across standing outside the door to this room. She had sensed some tension between the two but it wasn't any of her business unless it directly impacted her patient's wellbeing. Unable to resist, she reached out and pushed his bangs off his forehead. He seemed like such a nice guy, she hoped it all worked out for him, whatever it was. She turned and left the room and Deeks slept on.