Chapter 5: Lavender scented sentiments
"Elize," said Teepo's concerned voice. "You gotta wake up, otherwise you might never do it again. C'mon now, wake up!"
Her eyes fluttered open and for a moment Elize had no recollection of where she was. Lungs constricted, a wave of coughing started to wrack her body as she sat up. A clean handkerchief found its way to her face and she grasped it tightly as she forced her lungs to work. The scent of lavender calmed her to the point she was no longer seeing spots.
She turned to see the king sitting next to her bed. In his hand was her notebook, his expression inscrutable. Elize wondered how long he had been watching over her.
"Why did you conceal your illness from me?" he asked, his eyes more somber than the tone of his voice.
"Would you have reported to Rowen and locked me up in my room so I would stay put?" she challenged.
"I may have," he admitted sternly. His eyes bore all the authority of his crown and his jaw was set in his displeasure.
"And you wonder why I told no one?" she retorted defiantly, her eyes reflecting dark green in the candlelight. "I refuse to be rescued as if I were still the child relying on everyone else's kindness. This cannot be undone anyhow." She looked at him with a hint of desperation. "I need to finish this and you promised to help me," she added.
"So I did," he said, letting out a slow, steady breath to calm himself. "The woman you sent from the city is resting in the Ministry of Healing. The healers are doing all they can to prolong her time. I…read your notes. I had no idea.…"
She looked away. He had seen everything regarding Labari that she never spoke of to anyone. Until Nihls joined the research team, life at Labari had been miserable. From the testing, needles, cold floor, cages, shock treatments, implants and the horrible food, she had written everything that Wingul and Deliah and her own memory could recall to decipher any patterns that might help her unravel the mystery of her own illness.
Elize sat back against the abundant pillows on her bed and looked over to the window sill where someone had watered the princessia flowers in a delicate porcelain vase.
"Rowen told me about the flowers in the Silent Caves." His eyes bore a deep expression; concern and compassion mixed with sadness as his hand reached out to touch her face.
"I cannot abide human suffering...but I also had different goals then. I knew the research was being done by the Tribes. When I took over the Tribes I did not stop the research. I thought I needed it to make Auj Oule stronger." His voice lowered in solemn remorse. "I ask your forgiveness. I had just come into power and I did not know any of the particulars nor did I care to," he said regretfully, "and so I did not come to your aid."
She took his large, calloused hand in hers and held it gently. "If you had known nothing would have changed since the research would have been done with or without you and we were strangers. I survived and I chose to walk my own path. I still am."
He offered a empathetic look. "I too suffered much when I was young. Inept rulers drove my people, good men, to their deaths because of archaic traditions and stubborn pride. I held onto nothing but anger and used it as my blade. It is a miracle neither of us gave in to despair. That you act with such grace for the sake of others is laudable."
Elize looked down shyly at his words.
Rowen stood at the door and cleared his throat. He eyed the pair with great scrutiny. Immediately, Gaius pulled his hand away from hers and stood up so that Rowen could replace him. Rowen's grumpy expression reserved for the king turned grandfatherly and soft again for Elize.
"I am so glad you are awake, my dear Elize. My old heart had quite the scare." He sat on the bed and she hugged him tightly.
"Sorry, Rowen," she said almost tearfully. "I kept this from you."
"Oh now, now," said the old man, patting her back. "I could never be upset at you, Elize."
"I on the other hand received quite the tongue lashing," muttered the king.
"Well deserved," the old gentleman snapped back.
"I had no idea she was so capricious," the Gaius insisted. "Next time I will be better prepared and lock her in the tower." He shot a disapproving glance in her direction again and Elize did her best not to laugh. She stuck up her chin defiantly and smiled, "Do your worst."
After Rowen reprimanded her for being so careless with her health, both men bade her goodnight and snuffed out the candles as they left.
The king entered his bedchamber and went to his work desk where many documents had been piled on by his staff. Each one required a seal and his signature and it seemed it would be another long night.
Yet Rowen's parting words seemed to reverberate in his head. "She has many suitors in Sharilton. I hope to live to see her happily wed and that this illness will be nothing but afterthought in her years to come."
It bothered him. For once, there was nothing he could do. For all the power he had as king and yet to be unable to help a frail young lady was unnerving.
There was also this unsettling feeling in his chest when he was near her. It was not quite pain, as when someone had struck him in the chest during battle; and it was not quite fear since he feared nothing. She was a mere child when he first met her but what irked him most was that he did not see her as a child anymore. "I am being nonsensical. She is still young," he insisted to himself in the empty room where his private thoughts aired themselves out.
Gaius shook any other stray thoughts of her out of his head. Above all he was a man of self control. He had crossed paths with beautiful women before and every time he felt nothing. It should not be any different now. He had never needed a companion and this was hardly the time to change. A king was busy enough as is and there was no need to divert himself with lofty gifts like love and affection.
These are not things I deserve...not after everything I have done...
He poured himself a glass of wine. Strolling out onto his balcony he took in a deep breath of cold, fresh, night air. It was invigorating. Just as he was turning back towards his desk, the light of a candle caught his eye in the courtyard below. A cloaked figure walked back around towards the Ministry of Healing, wisps of golden hair catching the light.
"Can she not stay still for just one moment?" he cursed under his breath and followed after her.
"What in the name of the Four is going on here?" the king demanded as he stood in the doorway of the Ministry of Healing. Elize immediately went up to him and put her finger to his lips and told him sternly to keep his voice down. He was taken aback by her sudden command of the situation and she turned around and ignored him as she and the herbalist prepared medicinal paraphernalia on a nearby table. The herbalist then bowed left them alone.
"If you intend to stay, pluck the petals from this princessia and pinch off the stem." She handed him a mortar and pestle. "Grind the remainder into here."
He sighed in exasperation but did as he was told.
"You dare give me orders?" asked the king.
"Sulking is unbecoming, Your Majesty. When I look at you now I just see you as Erston. Erston can make himself useful," she smirked.
"Oh really?" he asked dryly.
She sighed. "Sleep eluded me," she confessed. "I thought I would try to make a new formula for Deliah."
"Medicine of your own making?" he asked incredulously.
She nodded. "I studied the herb lore of Auj Oule for two years at Talim as a post graduate course through the Academy," she said as she measured a thin, white powder onto a measuring spoon and put it into a vial of water that was just about to boil. "That was before I became Drisell's secretary. My medicines are currently sold on the market, with Alvin's help."
"So you help govern the people of Sharilton, you create medicine and you are trying to save the lives of the Labari research subjects," he said, brow raised. "It seems you are quite busy."
Elize answered thoughtfully, "You and Rowen, Jude, Leia, Milla, and Ludger - everyone is doing their best to change the world for the better. I would be remiss of my responsibility if I let everyone else do the work. I wish to create a better world as well."
"Oh?"
"A world to right past wrongs. Perhaps I can bring them peace, and perhaps...," her voice trailed off, "I can obtain it for myself."
His hands went still as he observed her expression. A strange tightness in his chest urged him to console her.
"May joys from afar beget joys close to the hearth..." the king recited. "The old man's favorite quote."
"Exactly," she smiled and the hollow expression passed.
He noticed a bundle of flowers on the table. "Lavender?" asked Erston.
"The scent is pleasing." She lifted a sprig to her nose and inhaled gently. "It lingers on you."
He was a bit surprised at her words but more surprised that his face grew flush.
"It was…my mother's favorite. Karla told my laundress to press my handkerchiefs with lavender for some insidious reason of her own no doubt."
Elize giggled. "Lavender means 'love and devotion' in the language of flowers. Your mother must have been a wonderful woman. Your sister seems very kind."
"True on both counts," he smiled wistfully.
"Family is precious," she said without expression as she measured a greenish liquid and continued to work. The king watched her with fascination. Her hands were delicate and precise.
Eventually her fatigue finally caught up with her and she placed a forehead in one hand.
"You have pushed yourself too far," he said conclusively. "Come." She could not argue with him this time.
As they walked back toward the royal apartments she faltered a little and clung to him for support.
"You should not work yourself to the bone," he chided and picked her up effortlessly off the ground. The novelty of being subject to his 'princess hold' had worn off and she continued to provoke him.
"The pot is calling the kettle black. Do you still sleep only a half hour each night?" she retorted.
"Well, yes," he answered stubbornly. "There are many things that need to be done."
"Not enough," she chastised, shaking her head in disapproval.
"Impossible. I cannot warp time like Chronos."
"You can be more efficient," she reasoned. "Delegate the work. That's why you pay your staff."
"Impertinent," he responded in a huff. She let out a little laugh and wrapped her arms around his neck to secure her position. Gaius' grip around her waist involuntarily tightened and his body went rigid when the feel of her breath on his neck overloaded his senses beyond logic.
"Even your shirts smells like lavender," she said sleepily, inhaling a lungful of it.
"Elize," he said, straining.
"What's wrong? Am I too heavy?"
Without a word he put her down and pressed her gently against her chamber door.
"Erst-?!" she said before letting out a little gasp as he rested his forearm against the door and moved in closer until their faces were nearly touching, inadvertently inhaling the faint scent of princessia flowers.
He said something she could not quite hear as her blood was ringing loudly in her ears from the closeness of the moment.
It seemed he was berating her for something and she automatically breathed an apology as she looked into his serious, dark brown eyes tinted red and gold in the torchlight - eyes that both reprimanded and pleaded with her. Elize thought her heart would beat out of her chest, embarrassed at both the exchange and that he might hear it.
Everything about him and their current position gave her thoughts she would define as forbidden, or what Teepo would call "adult."
Life had taught her that youth did not deter things like friendship and love, nor did it suppress courage. If she was dying, and this would be the only opportunity to experience something she had wanted to try for a long time but could never find the right timing.… If he was willing.… Elize ignored the possibility that perhaps he was not.
She rued the folly of her youth. Without even thinking if he would be angry, in that moment she made a decision she knew would later trouble them both.