Hearts

Chapter Fourteen

No hope

Wenn die Vergangenheit uns einholt

The next few days passed pretty uneventful. Law got used to life within the Galleya Company, and even after a few days he could sincerely say he even enjoyed living with Kidd and all the other slightly crazy members of the Galleya Company. Suddenly he had something to look forward to when he came home from his double shift at the hospital. Not that he hadn't looked forward to come home and meet Kidd after work, but somehow this was nicer. More domesticated. He felt welcomed, he felt like he was part of a big family – a functionary family, he added in his thoughts, not at all like the Donquixote family.

He even had a car that he could use to his liking so he could drive to the Hospital and back. Before he had lived within walking distance of the Hospital, but now he could even save some time on the way to work. He thoroughly enjoyed the meals that Sanji cooked and that his old circle of friends was still around him. He finally could spent more time with them and could make up for all the times he had neglected them the past months when he had been working like crazy and selling his body to Kidd.

Nami and Robin had questioned him thoroughly about the nature of his relationship to Kidd, but he had actually managed to evade all those invading questions about the fact that Kidd was paying him seven grand to live with him and have sex daily.

And well, it wasn't all rainbows and unicorns. The hours at the hospital still exhausted him, and the looming threat of Doflamingo dimmed his good mood. He had finally began to sell Doflamingo a few selected pieces of information about the Company, some stuff where he was pretty sure that it didn't harm the Company that bad. He had heard Shanks words about loyalty ringing in his head when he had called Doflamingo during a break at the Hospital.

And then there was Kidd. Law knew he was kidding himself if he thought they were living in a healthy relationship together. It was still the old game. He was financially dependent on Kidd and they both knew it. The power imbalance in the relationship sometimes worried him. Since Doflamingo he usually had a problem with partners that were too dominant, too assertive, too commanding. But somehow Kidd was also quite charming, in his rough ways. And he knew that he needed a partner that could give him some contra and wouldn't let himself be pushed around by him.

But still, his outlook on life was suddenly much brighter. He was quite surprised that he was so pleased by a little domestic routine. There was a certain kind of bliss in coming home from work to a more or less loving partner, excellent food, and a warm bed. He felt safe within the Company. When was the last time he had ever felt safe?

He felt his attachment to the Company and Kidd slowly growing. He was reluctant to lose it all. But deep down he knew it was only a matter of time until Doflamingo would take it all away. Until his past would ruin his present. He sincerely hoped that he had still a few years before his life would go to shit. And he knew it ultimately would. It was just a matter of time. The clock was ticking. And he wouldn't allow himself to even feel the tiniest flutter of hope. No hope.

The only thing he was hoping for were a few years with Kidd. Being able to work as a surgeon. He was so tired of running. Tired of hiding.

The alarm clock threw him out of his peaceful early morning musings. Sighing he turned the annoying sound off, removed Kidd's heavy arm from his hips, and detached himself mournfully from the heating furnace he called his boyfriend. Kidd just grunted and turned around and snuggled himself deeper in the part of the mattress Law had occupied prior.

Law took a quick shower, threw on his work clothes, grabbed a sandwich downstairs from the fridge and left the quite building. He was always the one to get up first. Galleya workers liked to sleep in.

He liked the quiet of the morning. The first rays of sunlight grazing earth. How the sky turns pink. He checked the digital clock on the stove. 5:39. He was still on time. Walking out of the door he bit into Sanji's sandwich. Yummy.

Still chewing he reached the car he was allowed to use, unlocked the door, climbed in, and put the half eaten sandwich on the seat next to him. He started the engine and began to make his way of the Galleya grounds. He still felt a slight twinge in his lower back. He couldn't help but grin when he remembered last night's thorough session with Kidd. That man didn't know when to stop. Oh no. There weren't any boundaries left between them. Nothing left except skin on skin, heat, and the salty taste of sweat.

He slammed the brakes. Right there, illuminated by his headlights, stood a tall figure. A cruelly familiar figure. Diamante.

The man just stood casually there, calm, with his crazy painted face, right in the middle of the driveway of the Galleya grounds and stared right at him.

Seconds ticked by. No one moved. And then Diamante slowly raised his arm and pointed on his watch. The clock is ticking.

And then he was gone.

Shit. Motherfucking shit. Oh no. This was so not happening to him. Shit. He squeezed his eyes shut and massaged his forehead. Then he opened his eyes again, shook his head and hit the gas. He arrived at work on record time.

God, he knew what that meant. They were watching him. They knew where he was. What he was doing. That what he already gave Doflamingo wasn't enough. The bastard wanted more. He always wanted more. He would never stop wanting. He would never stop. It would never stop.

He sat in the parking lot of the Grand Line Hospital and couldn't make himself to leave the car. He had to think. He had to think of something quick. The clock was ticking. Time was running out.

"Kidd, you got a minute?" Shanks asked him.

"Sure." Kidd nodded, dropped his tools and followed Shanks into the shade of the office building. "What's up, boss?"

"Law's at work, right?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Look, Kidd, don't take this the wrong way, but there's something you should know."

"And it has something to do with Law?"

Shanks nodded. There was no trace of his trademark grin left on his face. The red haired man looked suddenly every one of his forty-seven years. Thin lines around his eyes and mouth were showing. Usually Kidd didn't notice that he wasn't the only one with a missing arm, but right now he openly noticed that Shanks was crippled.

"Do you…" Shanks sounded uncertain. "Do you know something about his past?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I mean the time before you met him. Before he was a surgeon."

"We didn't exactly talk about it. I know he has some huge debt. And his debtor is kinda a dick. But that's not what you meant, right?"

"No. No, I don't. It seems to me as if you both have a common acquaintance."

"What the fuck are you talking about? Who?"

"Joker. Also known as Donquixote Doflamingo."

Kidd just couldn't believe it. He didn't want to believe it. So he didn't. He trusted Law. He trusted Law. He trusted him.

He was on his frantic way to the hospital, he needed to talk to Law, and he needed to do it now. He just wanted to make sure. Right? Law wouldn't. Law wouldn't betray him. It was just a rumor, right? That didn't necessarily mean that Law knew Joker. There was probably a really simple explanation. Like they met once one accident. Or there was another Law affiliated with Doflamingo. Right? There would be an easy and obvious explanation. Shanks and his worries. The man was getting old. Drank too much, couldn't judge the situation clearly. Damn that alcoholic. No, no, Law wouldn't. He just wouldn't. He trusted him. They had quite the rugged beginning, but that didn't matter anymore. Law was his.

He knew Law. He fucking trusted him.

But there were things he didn't forgive. Well, to be exact, only one sin. And that sin was Joker. So he hoped that it was better not true. Hell, he forgave Law that he had been prostituting himself. The sin of sins. The ultimate downfall. He didn't forgive his whore of a mother - but he had forgiven Law. They had finally reached some kind of balanced life. Domesticated bliss. They fucking deserved to be happy. No, no. This was just a huge misunderstanding. Nothing to worry about. Law would have an explanation. It would all make sense in the end, right? There was always so much drama born out of miscommunication. Yeah. This was just another case of communication gone wrong. It was so easy to misunderstand the other person! Maybe Shanks misunderstood Mihawk. God knew what those two were up to. Or if this all was some petty scheme constructed by Mihawk, that sly bastard. There would be an easy explanation. There had to be.

He really needed to pay more attention to traffic. He almost ran that red light. Shit. Concentrate, Kidd. He hadn't lost his calm like this in years. He knew he had a short fuse, but usually he never lost his footing. But shit, Law unsettled him. He felt as if the ground was shaking. He was unstable on his feet. He was reeling.

Traffic was a bitch around this hour. Damn it! He needed to be at the hospital, now!

He honked angrily and hoped that the cars would just fucking drive! He wanted to bash his head into the steering wheel. But the tiny bit of rationality that was still left to him knew that that wouldn't really be helpful. Damn rush hour traffic. Why didn't he take his bike?

Finally the car in front of him moved. But traffic was still going way too slow. After another anxious fifteen minutes he finally reached the parking lot of the Grand Line Hospital. He parked the car – and couldn't make himself leave it. He needed air. He needed to breathe. He needed to get a fucking grip. He couldn't do this. He just couldn't. He trusted Law, right? There was probably nothing to worry about. It was all a rumor. Easy to explain. No drama. It would be alright. He would just casually walk into the hospital, into Law's office, greet him, say that he had missed him and had wanted to visit him at work. And then he would ask Law about Joker. And then Law would give him a perfectly reasonable explanation. Law would laugh at him for freaking out about it. Then they would kiss and make up. Right? Right?

He buried his head in his hands. He hadn't been this out of control since Killer had died. Usually he had his emotions under control. Hell, usually he didn't even have any emotions at all. And then he realized it. He felt a shudder running down his back. An icy hand gripping his intestines and squeezing them. Claws digging through his heart.

He was in love with Law.

Could someone please punch him in the face? Shit. That would probably explain why he was cowering in the parking lot of the hospital like a pathetic wimp. That would probably explain why he was so damn afraid of losing Law. That Law would turn his back on him and walk out and never look back. That he would walk right into the arms of Doflamingo.

He took another deep breath. He needed to get his shit back together. Desperately. He was Eustass fucking Kidd, one of the most dangerous men in Grand Line City, a ruthless killer, member of the infamous Galleya Company, and he fucking owned the city.

He ran his gloved metal hand through his shock of red hair, shook his head, and left the car. He walked up to the hospital and tried to look as casual as possible. The woman at the reception quirked a brow at him, but she still told him where he could find the cardiac wing. He walked through the sterile corridors of the hospital and still felt as if he was walking right into hell. His own personal hell. On some subconscious level hospitals still reminded him of the time when he got his mechanical arm. When Vegapunk had abused his body.

He found the cardiac surgery in the west wing of the hospital. Except a few busy nurses the hallways were deserted. He looked for the offices and finally found and unremarkable door. The nametag read: Dr. Trafalgar Law MD. Some part of him was weirdly proud of Law. That he had made it. Then he remembered what he was here for. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

No answer.

He knocked again. Again: Silence. So Law wasn't in his office. Fine. He would just wait for him. He leaned against the wall and started to wait for Law. The seconds ticked by. Fuck this shit. He wasn't known for his patience. He tried the door. It was locked. He quickly checked if there was someone around and when the no one was around any longer he took his glove off and used his mechanical hand to pick the lock. Click. He quickly slipped inside and closed the door behind him.

Law's office was nice. He had a huge mahogany desk and a plush leather chair. Book cases decorated the walls, filled to the brim with medical journals and books. Kidd was reminded of Law's flat. His office even had a balcony attached to it, but the curtains were partly drawn and obscured the view of parts of the balcony. The glass door was open and a nice warm breeze came in.

He stepped out onto the balcony and he realized that he had a nice view of the parking lot. Well, you couldn't have everything. He watched cars coming and going, people in wheelchairs getting pushed around the lot, smoking nurses huddled in a corner, and ambulances racing off and coming back.

He enjoyed the rays of sun on his face and tried to work out what he would say to Law.

Suddenly he heard the lock of the door click and the doorknob turn. He stayed where he was.

Someone came into the office. He heard some ruffling around and then the distinct sound of the telephone receiver being picked up. He couldn't jump into the room and just disrupt the phone call, right? That would be impolite. Yeah. He stayed where he was and listened.

A number was dialed. Then, Law's unmistakable voice.

"It' Law."

Pause.

"My code is Heart."

Pause.

Code? What did Law need a code for?

"I'm calling from an unprotected line."

Pause.

No.

"Yes, I know that. I don't care. I need to speak to Diamante."

Pause.

Who the fuck was Diamante?

"Just tell him that I'm willing to pay my debt."

Pause.

"No. I need to meet him. I won't do this on the phone. This will be face to face, or it won't happen."

Pause.

"Are you sure? Yes. Yes, I got that."

Pause.

"You do realize that I know Doflamingo way longer than you do? I've been by his side when you weren't even part of the organization. He will meet me, trust me. And guess what? He trusts me too. This meeting has to be just the two of us. Tonight. Yeah, I know. I have something for him. Something he had been searching for a long time. Something he had wanted from the very beginning."

Pause.

No. No. He didn't. He didn't hear this. This wasn't happening. This wasn't – This wasn't real. No.

"Tonight. Yes. I will be there."

Click.

He couldn't think. He couldn't comprehend this. His synapses couldn't process the data. This wasn't happening. This wasn't –

Shit.

For some reason he had to think about Killer again. Maybe his brain just connected the pain. Killer would've warned him. Killer would've laughed at him for being so damn stupid. He needed to stop this. He couldn't –

He needed to stop this madness right now.

He fiddled for a second with the fur lining on his coat. He was nervous. Between the death of Killer and his mechanical arm he had thought that he had lost feelings like nervousness. Guess not. Guess who could make him feel all over again.

He entered the room and just stood in the doorway. Law sensed him immediately, turned around and drew in a sharp breath. His face was ash white. Ash white. Like the ashes falling from the sky when everything burned.

"Did you - did you hear?" Law's voice is trembling.

"Let me guess: It isn't what it looks like?" he twisted the words sarcastically.

"It isn't."

"Great. Really fucking great."

"Kidd, damn it, listen, I can explain – "

"I don't think you need to explain anything. I get it. Really, I get it. Joker – or should I call him Doflamingo? – is your debtor. I get it. I know what you've done."

"Oh, do you? Fine. The Question is: can you get over it or not?"

"Get over it? Are you fucking serious? You just basically offered Joker information, right? I'm not stupid. I know that Joker had been searching for a way to bring the Company down. But he didn't find one. He didn't find one. And then – it's easy. It was so damn easy for you. And I've been the oblivious fool. I've been a fool from the very beginning, right? You saw me enter the bar with other known Galleya workers. And then you just needed to gain my trust, you needed me to get inside. Through me you got access to the Galleya grounds, to our offices, to everything. Through me. Shit. I haven't thought once that it would be me that would bring in a mole. That it would be me that aided to the downfall of the Company. Shit, Law, I fucking trusted you."

"It wasn't like that-"

"I even gave you money! I don't get you. Why the money? Was it to raise my pity? So I would trust you easier? Yeah, of course it was, finally you had a great to move in with me, you're a good actor really, acting all reluctant in the beginning, the prospect of us two living together, no shit, Law, I won't fucking just get over it!"

"Fine. Apparently you won't let me a chance to explain myself. This is ridiculous."

"RIDICULOUS? You're so full of shit, you lying son of a bitch-"

"Oh yeah? This is ridiculous. This whole argument. Why are you telling me all this? You know what? Yes, I betrayed you. I betrayed the Company. And I would do it again."

"You betrayed the Company?" Kidd just couldn't comprehend what he was hearing. He was utterly unprepared for this argument. For everything that left Law's pale lips. Law's ashen face with the big black scared eyes. "You betrayed the company?" he repeated. His voice was trembling.

"I sold you all out."

"Why?" he whispered.

Law smiled sadly. "I didn't want to. Believe me. Remember when you asked me to move in with you? I warned you right then. I told you that I would hurt you in the end. I told you so."

"That's your excuse? That's your cheap excuse? That you have warned me?"

Law just stared at him. He was scared of the depth in those eyes. The hardness in them. Why did he never notice before? Law's eyes gave him away. He had the eyes of a ruthless killer. Cold, without emotion, without any hint of feelings. Then Law turned around and was walking towards the door.

"What are you doing?" Kidd shouted.

"Leaving."

"Leaving?"

"I guess you're not willing to be in any sort of relationship with me anymore, much less let me live with you. My debt was real, for your information. And I'm guessing you're also not willing to pay me more money to kill that debt. So it's over. I really don't wanna live a life with Doflamingo in it any longer. So I'm leaving. I'm gonna leave the country."

"But you said – you said on the phone that you're going to meet with him tonight-"

"Believe what you want, Eustass."

"I can't let you go."

Law turned his head around and looked at him. Again with those dead eyes. Why did he never notice that there wasn't any life in his eyes? But Law just shrugged and continued walking towards that door. He couldn't let Law go. Law couldn't leave him. He grabbed Law's elbow and yanked him back.

"What – "

The last thing Kidd felt was the sting of a needle in his neck. Then his vision got fuzzy. The last thing he saw was Law's white coat vanishing through the door.

Then he blacked out.

He opened his eyes and everything was dark. His head was spinning. He felt as if he was rising from the dead. And shit, he knew how that felt like. For a second he feared he was back in Vegapunk's lab. But then he remembered that Vegapunk was long dead.

Was he on a mission? A mission gone wrong? Where the fuck was he?

Slowly his eyes adjusted to the darkness around him. Oh. It was just at night. He could make out the legs of a table. Apparently he was lying on the ground. On a really uncomfortable and hard ground somewhere inside. Damn, his head hurt. He still couldn't grab a clear thought. All was still fuzzy. He felt the compelling pull to fall back asleep. The ground wasn't that uncomfortable, wasn't it? He could just close his eyes again, right? No harm done.

Suddenly he remembered.

Law.

He needed to stop Law.

He desperately tried to fight his dizziness. He felt like he was on drugs. Wait. Law had drugged him. He actually was on drugs. Law, that sneaky bastard, had sedated him. He tried to clear his head. He needed his usual clarity. His sharpness. He needed to get up. He groaned and tried to move his heavy body. Every movement made him even dizzier. What the hell had been in that syringe?

He sat up and promptly vomited. The vertigo wasn't playing fair with his stomach. Shit. Shit. He needed to get up. He needed to warn the others. That Law had sold them out. That they were all in danger.

What time was it?

He needed to get up.

How long did he lie on the cold linoleum floor, passed out? Shit. Who knew what Law was capable off in the hours he had been passed out. It was dark outside. So that meant Law had been on the loose for at least six hours.

Finally he was able to hold onto one leg of the table. His mechanical arm did most of the work in pulling him upright. Thank god that drugs couldn't affect the mechanics of his artificial arm.

The digital clock on Law's desk read three am. So He had been passed out for over sixteen hours. Law had been gone for over sixteen hours. He didn't want to image what Law was capable of in that time.

He needed to warn the Company. He searched his pockets for his cell with his mechanical arm. He didn't find it. Law must've taken it. That sneaky bitch. No phone. Fine. He propped him up on the desk and reached for the landline. Disconnected. Of course. Law was thorough.

He padded his pockets again for his car keys. He wasn't even surprised anymore when he acknowledged that they were gone too. At least the adrenaline now pumping through his veins made him think a little clearer. He stumbled over to the attached bathroom, washed the bile out of his mouth and splashed some cold water into his face. He needed to shake of the last remnants of the drug.

What now?

He needed to warn the others. Quickly.

He stumbled out of Law's office. Down the deserted hallway. He tried the door next to Law's office. Locked, of course. This time he wasn't as subtle as he had before when he broke into Law's office. He just punched a hole through the door and wrenched it open. Another office, thank god. An office with a phone on the desk.

And this time the landline wasn't disconnected.

He dialed the number of the Galleya compound. It was the only number he had memorized. It was the most important number. The number would make the phones in the office ring. The phone in the kitchen. The other phone in the living room. Another phone in the main workshop. And usually someone would answer.

He prayed that someone would answer. He fucking prayed.

But no one answered.

He was fucked.

He stumbled out of the hospital, dread building in his gut. This wasn't supposed to happen. Not like this. Not because he had been too dumb and too blinded to realize what was really going on.

When he reached the parking lot he was finally able to walk straight again. More or less. He went to the spot where he had parked his car – empty. No surprise there. He just walked over to the closest car parking there, smashed in the window, silenced the car alarm and short circuited the car.

He needed to stop Law.