Training Camp… Or Not
Disclaimer: I don't own the Prince of Tennis cast. XD. I wish I did though... But I do own the storyline from here on!
Chapter summary: Nothing is going the way it's supposed to be. Akaya is scarred, scared and suffering from a strange affliction. Sanada is going insane and there's no doubt about it. Wonder how much of that is due to his teammates? Marui and Jirou make their grand entrance while Choutarou weeps his little heart out. Niou and Yagyuu make up. Kind of. Ok… They don't. But at least the Trickster tried. Right?
Warnings: Crack, OOC and shounen ai.
A/N: -looks around- I'm sorry! Really! I've been swamped by everything and this just kind of fell to the side. I'll try harder to update more often! I SWEAR! -cough- I think I'd deserve it if no one reviewed wouldn't I? -bows- Again, I'm really, really sorry for not updating earlier!
Eh… As usual, any ideas, cracky or drama-ish or anything is welcomed (I'm seriously in need of some inspiration!) As are reviews, suggestions and corrections.
For Sandy.
Chapter Nineteen: The Morning After
Akaya was asleep. And he was having quite nice dreams, considering the truly dreadful torture that Oshitari had subject him to right before he fainted. There were bunnies and golden ducks everywhere. Oh and lots of sandpits and Yukimura-buchou to play with him.
No blue haired tensai anywhere in sight.
Suddenly, a big grey cloud appeared over Akaya's pretty world and it started to rain. His world became dark and dreadful and filled with Hyoutei players.
Akaya whimpered softly.
Then the cloud went away, but Akaya was stuck somewhere else entirely.
Akaya's dream self looked around curiously. It appeared to be the dining room in Atobe's mansion. The second year Rikkai player sat quietly in his seat and wondered why there wasn't anyone else there.
He thought he heard a sound from far away. It sounded similar to a snore… But after looking around, Dream Akaya noted that there wasn't anyone sleeping. Not in this room anyway.
The big grandfather clock chimed seven times. Seven o'clock. And everything started to happen.
Poor Akaya never stood a chance. Well… his brain didn't at any rate. The poor thing was close to exploding from everything it was trying to take in.
Finally, it just gave up and Akaya woke up with a crash, having fallen out of bed. He lay unmoving for a moment as his head spun with images of strange and not so wonderful things, such as a laughing Sanada and a female version of Marui.
Akaya shuddered and shook his head to dislodge the errant thoughts. The second year Rikkai ace picked himself up and dusted himself off. It was then that he noticed the /thing/ on his bed.
It stretched and shoved its glasses firmly onto its nose. Then it opened its mouth and drawled out a greeting, "Good morning Akaya. We had a good night didn't we?"
Akaya ran screaming out of the room.
Sanada had never been a morning person, but even he couldn't ignore the sight that greeted him as he stumbled down to the dining room.
His roommate, however, didn't even give the object of Sanada's horror a second glance. Hiyoshi merely continued on his way downstairs, not looking left or right.
After a moment, Sanada concluded that Hiyoshi probably was the smartest one of the lot and thus followed in his path.
He gave the /thing/ one more distraught look before snapping his attention forward only.
//If I pretend I don't see it, it'll go away… // He chanted to himself in his mind. Continuously.
Sanada was sure that if he told himself that enough times, he'd actually believe it.
//I don't see it… I don't see it… // He closed his eyes and walked forward, straight into Marui himself.
//ARGH! I SEE IT//
Jirou bounced and tugged at Marui. "Come on! Hurry up Marui-kun! We don't want to be late to breakfast!"
Marui rubbed his eyes. He wasn't the most awake person in the world in the morning.
Add to that equation the amount of sleep power he inhibited last night and you have one drowsy, low sugar tensai.
He didn't notice the big grin that Jirou wore as he was tugged and dragged down to the dining room, and he definitely didn't notice the strange greeting that Yagyuu gave when he passed his megane wearing teammate on his way down to breakfast. He almost noticed when his vice-captain gave him a terrified look and sprinted down the hallway.
However, he did register the snicker of a short, red-haired acrobatics player. Namely Mukahi Gakuto.
Marui felt in his pockets for some gum and popped one into his mouth after locating a stray.
"What?" His question was directed to the red-haired Hyoutei player. "Are you jealous of my tensai-ness?"
Jirou whooped and bounced around, "Marui-kun is SUGOI!"
Gakuto snickered again before just shaking his head and moving away, "Perhaps."
The Rikkai tensai popped a bubble with Jirou cheering him on in the background. He was sure that something wasn't right, but it was still too early in the morning.
Marui sighed and continued on his way down the stairs. Everything would have to wait until he had breakfast.
Besides, he could always ask Jackal later on if he had something on his face. The looks he continued to receive were starting to freak him out.
Yagyuu shook his head and continued prodding Shishido who was walking ahead of him. "A bit faster please, Ryou."
Really, Marui just got stranger each time Yagyuu ran into him.
Shishido whipped his head around and was about to snap a reply. His words died in his throat at the glint in Yagyuu's glasses. "Erm… Sure…"
His feet dragged as he continued on. Internally, Shishido was mourning. He had missed his daily ritual time with Choutarou!
He struck a pose, just like a tragic statue, filled with despair at what pain Choutarou must have gone through when they were so cruelly separated last night.
"Oh Chouta…"
That was all he had enough time to get out before an impatient Yagyuu 'accidentally' bumped into him.
Good thing was that Shishido had an amazing sense of balance.
Pity he was just at the very edge of the stairs leading downwards.
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!" Shishido rolled down the stairs.
Yagyuu pushed his glasses up a little. "Oops."
If anyone didn't know better, they'd have thought that the Gentleman was completely innocent.
And then there would have been the sad little fact that they'd be wrong.
Akaya peeked around the edge of the door to the dining room.
There were two people already in there. Neither of them had blue hair nor wore glasses. Akaya pushed the door open a little further.
The two occupants of the room looked up. Yanagi Renji raised an eyebrow, "Akaya? What are you doing?"
With those words, the Rikkai second year flung open the door and threw himself onto his senpai's lap. "YANAGI-SENPAI!"
Renji would have blinked, except that would have required him to open his eyes. "Akaya? Are you alright?"
The answer to his question was muffled by Akaya mumbling everything into his shirt, "NomuffleOshitarimufflefreakmufflekillermufflescarytensaimuffleomghetriedtokillmemuffle."
Renji petted Akaya's hair, having processed and apparently understood everything, "Oshitari? He can't be /that/ scary Akaya. He's human like the rest of us…"
"Nu uh." Akaya shook his head. "He's an immortal blood sucking monster from out of space."
"Are you sure you haven't been playing too many video games… Akaya-kun?" The slow drawl made the hair on Akaya's neck stand up.
"EEK! IT'S HIM! HELP ME YANAGI-SENPAI!" At that point, Akaya had climbed onto Renji's lap.
With a sigh, Renji dislodged him and placed his frightened teammate behind Kabaji. Oshitari gave him a very innocent look. "I didn't do anything…"
"Yes you did!" Akaya piped up, obviously feeling safer than before. His head appeared from behind the hulking Hyoutei second year.
A dramatic finger was pointed at Oshitari. "You… you… could have gotten me pregnant!"
Renji froze at this. His gaze went from Akaya to Oshitari warily. "Erm… Excuse me?"
A series of crashes from behind made everyone turn around. Sanada, who had been sitting invisibly at the table up until now was currently on the floor. He looked torn between telling Akaya off for such a lie or running off while he still had the chance to.
He decided to clean this mess up before it got any further. More woe him.
Sanada straightened.
He was the fukubuchou of the prestigious Rikkai tennis team. They had won consecutive nationals. Nothing like this should stop him. The pride of Rikkai was on the line. It didn't matter if he had to re-educate his errant second year in the birds and the bees again, it was on Rikkai /pride/.
With that thought burning in his mind, Sanada called out imperiously, "Akaya!"
The second year turned and blinked tearful eyes at him. Opening his mouth, Sanada was about to explain exactly why boys couldn't have children when a blue haired tensai decided to speak up.
Oshitari continued to smile like nothing obviously against the law of nature had been stated. "Yes I could have."
Akaya broke down in tears. "But… but… but… I don't want to be /pregnant/!" he wailed.
"PREGNANT?" Mukahi popped his head around the door. "Who is?"
Sanada opened his mouth to try again.
Akaya bet him to it, "I am!" he yelled. "Oshitari got me pregnant!"
"WHAT?!" Shishido, who was nursing a bruised head limped in and gave everyone in the dining room the most disbelieving look he could muster.
Yagyuu walked in behind him, casually aiming kicks at Shishido's rear end. He pushed his glasses up, "Really now?"
Sanada's determination still hadn't run away yet. "Akaya…"
Jackal sauntered into the room with Niou and Choutarou.
"What's going on here?" Niou asked curiously, seeing the amount of people looking either amused, distressed or otherwise with abnormal expressions on their face.
Akaya dumped himself onto the floor, "Oshitari's the father of my baby."
"Oh…" Jackal looked a bit surprised before his glance slid to Oshitari who was still smiling.
"Of course I'll take full responsibility." Oshitari grinned and winked.
Jackal smiled in a saintly way before making his way to the breakfast buffet. Niou snorted but continued to watch.
Gakuto looked thoughtful, "I thought you had to be a girl to be pregnant." He grinned, "Don't tell me that you've been a girl all this time."
Akaya threw a plate at the Hyoutei acrobatics player, "When I woke up, he was in my bed. That means I'm pregnant."
The Rikkai boy scowled, "Besides, you look more like a girl than I do!"
It was Gakuto's turn to scowl, "I DO NOT!"
"DO SO!"
"DO NOT!"
"DO SO!"
The red-haired boy turned to his doubles partner, "Yuushi… Do I look more like a girl than him?"
Oshitari didn't even have to think, "Of course."
"YUUSHI!" Gakuto grabbed the nearest thing to hand, which happened to be a serving spoon and proceeded to chase Oshitari around the room with it.
By this time, Akaya was back at Renji's side crying.
Renji sighed and explained to the sniffling Akaya why he /couldn't/ have a baby. The second year's expression cleared before darkening.
"HE LIED!" Akaya proclaimed, pointing at Oshitari.
Oshitari paid him no attention at all. His entire focus was on not getting smacked by an oversized serving spoon.
Niou cornered Choutarou while Shishido growled in frustration.
Yagyuu's look had firmly told him that if he approached either Niou or Choutarou, there'd be hell to pay later.
"Shishido-san…" Choutarou sighed whilst gazing at his senpai with a hurt look in his eyes.
Niou patted his shoulder gently, "I'm sorry Choutarou."
Choutarou's big eyes swam with tears, "He didn't even come to greet me this morning and do our morning ritual song and dance."
Niou looked slightly perturbed but continued to pat the younger boy's shoulder, "There there… I'm sure that he didn't do that on purpose."
Choutarou burst into tears and started sobbing on Niou's shoulder, "Shi…Shishido-san doesn't want me anymore… What should I do?"
Niou looked a bit panicky now. He wasn't equipped to deal with crying boys. "Umm… Well… You know…"
He gestured frantically at Yagyuu who ignored him. However, Shishido was looking very fierce. Niou turned the gesturing onto the Hyoutei boy instead.
Shishido shoved back his chair, ignoring the looks that Yagyuu was giving him. Choutarou was crying.
Shishido was going to help.
Choutarou looked up just in time to see Shishido approaching. He lunged forward, leaving Niou suddenly unbalanced and clung to the older boy. "SHISHIDO-SAN!"
"CHOUTAROU!"
That was what Shishido really felt like yelling out, but he settled for a mumbled 'Oomph' as the taller boy tackled him to the ground and started bawling again.
Niou stared at the sight and decided to let them be. Instead, he siddled up to Yagyuu, "Oh Hi-ro-shi..."
Yagyuu didn't even blink, "What is it Niou-kun?"
"Can I cry on your shoulder too?"
Yagyuu smiled and Niou thought he had him.
The bespectacled boy stood up and held out his arms.
Niou grinned internally and skipped a couple of steps forward.
Yagyuu grabbed him and twirled him around.
Niou grinned outwardly. This was just like heaven.
The Gentleman's smile darkened as he calmly let go.
"Argh!" Niou sailed across the room to land in a heap in the dessert section of the buffet.
Jackal, who had been standing close by picking up some fresh fruit blinked and sighed, "Oh dear… Bunta's not going to be happy…"
Yagyuu bowed his apologies before resuming his breakfast.
Renji stared.
Sanada scrambled for the door. Screw pride. He wanted out.
Before he could reach it however, the door swung open and Jirou bounced in, dragging Marui with him.
"Hey everyone! Look at Marui-kun! Isn't he super sugoi?"
Sanada decided it was a good time to pass out.
Akaya stared before whimpering. "W…What happened to you Marui-senpai?"
Jackal looked surprised, "Say… That really kind of suits you Bunta."
Niou and Yagyuu were preoccupied in a silent cold war and neither bothered to comment.
Renji was jotting down data again.
Kabaji blinked but otherwise there was no change in his expression.
Oshitari and Gakuto paused in their cat and mouse game. Gakuto's mouth fell open. "HEY! That's…"
Oshitari put a hand under his own chin and surveyed the Rikkai tensai thoughtfully, "Gakuto, isn't that the outfit you wore last time we had a cross dressing party?"
Jirou rubbed his head sheepishly, "I'm sorry guys. But I thought it would look super cool on Marui-kun too!"
Marui blinked at everyone sleepily before nudging Sanada with a shoe, "Is fukubuchou alright?"
His gaze was caught by the pink frilliness that covered his lower half.
"Wha…?"
Jirou prodded him towards a mirror. Atobe had at least one full length one in every room. "Look! Isn't it super awesome?"
Marui stared at his reflection.
And stared.
And stared.
Niou took the chance to break his gaze away from Yagyuu and give Marui a surprised look. "Hey Bunta… You should wear lace more often."
Marui fainted theatrically into Jirou's arms.
Sanada appeared to come to himself. At least until he began laughing hysterically.
Renji's pen flew over his pages, "Ii data..."
"Fukubuchou's finally lost it…" One voice could be heard whispering to another.
Two sets of footsteps sounded in the hallway and two figures appeared.
Atobe and Yukimura arrived with big beaming smiles on their faces, "What have we missed?"
Hiyoshi followed after the two captains warily. He eyed the room apprehensively.
"What the…!?"
That really summed up everything nicely.
Argh… I know I don't deserve reviews… But… -puppy dog eyes- Please?