"Our wounds are often the openings into the best and most beautiful part of us."

-David Richo

The walk following the freak-out under the overpass was, to say the least, uncomfortable for Gary. His plan had the chance of being exposed at any moment, revealing that he wanted to use Amelie as a possible ally in attempting to retake over the school. She had the newness, the brains, the willingness to follow orders… it was what he hadn't expected that upset his plans. Amelie was kind, honest, innocent; for once he had found someone that was genuine. Even the biggest cynic couldn't detect false sincerity in her.

Gary felt an odd longing towards her that he had never had in anyone else. So maybe he was changing his plan. Maybe there were more important things than taking over a stupid school. Everything was so unclear. And talking with Amelie was going to be awkward since he had always avoided showing his true emotions. But if it worked, Gary could find true glory.

"You're awfully quiet..." Amelie observed, turning to look at Gary's face.

And acting weird, she wanted to add. Gary wasn't trying to grab her, hold her hand, sneak little glances... he looked a little defeated. Like maybe what Amelie had said had a profound effect on him.

But this is Gary we're talking about. Remember what Christy said? "He hates everyone at this school". And you go to Bullworth, don't you?

Amelie reflected on her inner thought. Yeah, but he saved me. Doesn't that count for something?

While Amelie pondered over him, the brunette looked down at his shoes. "Just thinking," he responded honestly. The silence returned after that and Amelie didn't attempt to revive the conversation again. It was obvious that this was hard enough for Gary as it is, so she didn't want to push him farther than he was willing to go.

The chill of the night fell upon them as a light breeze has begun. Gary reached into his pants pocket and pulled out a small box about the size of a deck of cards and Amelie looked at him curiously put kept quiet. Then he casually pulled out a slender, off-white cigarette and held it between his lips. Shocked, Amelie turned her face away quickly pretending that she hadn't noticed. A lighter appeared in his hand and he flickered the flame on and off, watching the fire light and then blow away.

Act cool, act cool...

Amelie stayed quiet while Gary lit the end of the cigarette with the orange flame, holding his hand over the end so the wind wouldn't blow the flame out. Flumes of smoke rose up into the sky casting a grayish glow. Gary sighed and held the cigarette between his fingers. Acting as if nothing happened would be the best bet for Amelie at this point, so she simply kept her eyes fixed in front of her.

Occasionally, the cold would send a shiver over her body and she wished Gary would give her his sweater or at least hold her hand, but he focused on smoking his cigarette. They walked all the way to the beach until they reached the end of the wooden dock over the sea. The boy plunked himself down on the edge being cautious of his smoke. His dark brown eyes glazed eyes over the nearly black waves with a sense of melancholy that Amelie had never seen in him. Compassion filled her heart and she sat down next to Gary, being careful not to touch him in case he didn't want to be touched.

It was nice sitting there with each other. There was an wordless sense of comfort between the two: Gary secretly loved her quiet company, Amelie secretly loved his unguarded attitude.

Amelie didn't know how long it had been-it could have been seconds, minutes, hours-when Gary took a long drag on his cigarette and blew the smoke out with a loud exhale and looked in her golden eyes. He looked a little frightening, and not in his usual way; dark circles appeared larger under his sorrowful eyes.

After a few moments, he set his eyes back to the sea and began to speak. "I didn't want you to find out that way." he stated regretfully. "That I was... like that. That I was at Happy Volts. I didn't want..." he took another slow drag on the cigarette. "You better not tell anyone I'm saying this or I'll-" Amelie looked at him with patient eyes. Gary backed down. "I'm sorry. I don't know how to say this stuff. I never learned."

She continued to gaze at him with a sympathetic look. Her silence prodded him to continue. "My parents weren't there for me." Gary's voice had the slightest tremble in it. "My father was... well, let's just say he and the bottle were the best of pals,"

A drunk.

"God, my mother had to take care of me by herself because my father would come home at ten at night just fucking wasted out of his mind, holding on to the walls for dear life. He was never a dad to me." Gary spat bitterly, flicking his cigarette ashes into the ocean. "He would come at three in the morning, drunk off his ass, and yell at her. 'Nancy, where's my FUCKING money' he would say. Never could keep a job, so he stole and all that shit. My mom would say she didn't know where, obviously, because he would just buy more booze with it,"

Gary looked up at the stars, sighing again. "So he'd say, 'Goddammit, you whore, stop stealing my money! I've got half a mind to...'"

Amelie looked at him carefully. "To..."

He threw back his head and laughed bitterly. "I don't know, whatever he felt in the mood for that night. Hitting, scratching, throwing bottles, all that standard abuse," His voice cracking on the word 'standard'. "And guess who he dealt with when he was done with my mother?" He moved his brown hair back slightly, showing off his facial scar. Amelie couldn't hold in her gasp.

"Yeah. So he... the old bastard decides it would be real funny to get the knives out one day. 'C'mon, Gary. Stand up to your old man!' I was ten. Ten years old. 'You wanna be a man, Gary? You're gonna have to learn the hard way.' He pinned me up against the wall... 'Listen to me, boy! Don't look away from me when I'm talking to you!'"

A small choke rose in Gary's throat. "'You've been a bad boy, making trouble at school. Why don't you learn your lesson?' The knife was so close to my face. I spit in his face as a gut reaction... I wanted to get me and my mom away, far, far away... but he was too quick. 'This will teach you to disobey me!'"

Now Gary, Gary Smith, was starting to sob.

"He... just sliced me. Like I was a fucking turkey dinner or something. After that, my aunt called the cops and sent my dad away. My mom remarried and I refuse to know the guy. No one will ever get as close to me as he was and hurt me like that again.

"As you can imagine, I got a little crazy," he faked laughter, "and my mother forced me to see a psychiatrist. The doctors labeled me with ADD and decided I needed to be put on pills until I could be 'normal' again. As if I ever was to begin with. No amount of pills or therapy will save me. And I can't take back what my good-for-nothing father did to my face...

Now I come back to school, and everyone hates me. Not that I care about those spoiled brats, anyway, but you know... I wish someone was on my side for once." He took a deep breath and wiped the tears from his eyes quickly. The cigarette returned to his lips with haste. Amelie didn't notice, but she had started crying too. It was suddenly clear. The scar, the attitude, the outbursts... Gary was hurting, but no one was willing to help.

"Please don't cry." Gary whispered with his eyes towards Amelie. The girl wiped her eyes with her hands to dry the tears. Once she had calmed her heavy breathing down, Amelie placed her hand on Gary's hand on the dock. Now he felt warm to her.

"I'm so sorry, Gary," she breathed.

"No, I'm the one that should be sorry for dragging you into this."

"Don't ever think that. You know I care about you."

"Well, you shouldn't. Nothing good can come out of me. I was destined to be like this. By myself... some people are just meant to be alone."

This response made Amelie begin to cry once more.

He hates you.

He's grieving.

He doesn't know what he's saying.

He needs help.

But the crying was uncontrollable. Amelie could completely empathize with Gary's feelings of isolation, so she cried for herself; however, she also cried of the thought that Gary didn't want to be around her.

The scarred boy's face returned to the ocean once more. "Look, I don't know what to say. I've never told anyone any of that. But I trust you understand. It's easier this way."

"If I hadn't known you had gone to Happy Volts, would you still want to be with me?" she heard herself pout.

He paused for a moment, still looking out to the water. "I was going to tell you." Gary said solemnly.

"So you just decided to wait until we got even closer and then tell me? What the hell, Gary?" Amelie hit Gary on his back with vigor but it didn't have an effect on him.

"No one has ever wanted to deal with me once they know. I thought you would be different once you knew me."

I do know you, she wanted to say. But it wasn't true and they both knew it. They had known each other all of two days and suddenly became wrapped up in the other's life.

Her hand tightened around Gary's and she leaned to his right side softly. "I'm not going anywhere."

The boy's heart felt warm with love. For once in his life, someone wasn't afraid of him or trying to bring him down. Amelie saw past his bullshit past and held his hand, even though everyone else thought he was a psycho. But maybe everyone else didn't matter.

Gary felt a silky bunch of hair rest on his shoulder as Amelie lay her head onto him. He buried his face in her dark brown locks, smelling the scent of heavenly shampoo. "Thank you," he murmured lightly, so lightly Amelie almost missed it.

"So, what's your deal?" Gary asked lightheartedly with his face still in her hair.

This is nothing compared to him.

"I uh, well, this is going to sound stupid. But I have anxiety. Like, really bad anxiety." Great job. I'm sure that he thinks you have such a hard life.

He stayed silent. "Go on."

A long breath went out of Amelie and she moved a piece of hair away from her face. "People used to bully me, a lot. I wasn't exactly the most confident girl as you can imagine," Amelie waited for a response but heard none. "People hated me; I always thought it was because I took school a lot more seriously than everyone else and I wasn't very outgoing. I was by myself a lot. My parents were 'concerned' about me. It was embarrassing, considering my older brothers were some of the most popular boys in town. I felt like an embarrassment to the family. I still do."

Gary remained quiet, so she took another deep breath and continued. "Everyday I have these thoughts, like my brain is about to go insane. Like I'm on the verge of a breakdown. It's this constant paranoia. And it's hard to talk to people because of it." She felt Gary stroke her hair lightly with his hand. "But with you, I'm not as afraid. You make me feel... different." Amelie was glad it was too dark out for Gary to see the redness forming on her cheeks. "Like you understand without me saying anything."

It was true; Gary had been sensitive with her even through his facade of snark and sarcasm.

"Mm," Gary mumbled against her hair.

"And The Velveteen Rabbit... well, that book has helped me through the hard times. It may sound silly but it's true. And when you joked about it before-"

"Amelie, I wasn't trying to make fun of you," Gary interrupted. "I thought you would appreciate it. I read the book since you seemed to be enjoying it last night," Long slender fingers continued to stroke Amelie's head comfortingly.

That's right, I feel asleep with it. In the Boys Dorm.

She exhaled with relief. At least now she knew that Gary was trying to be nice. "It's just that most people have that reaction when they find out I'm obsessed with a children's book."

This made Gary chuckle into her hair. "I'd rather have that problem than be a psycho off his meds."

"You take medication?"

"No," Gary murmured. "Not anymore. I don't need a pill or some doctor to tell me how I should feel."

Amelie decided to drop the subject, not wanting to let Gary return to his bad attitude. "I picked up smoking at Happy Volts," Gary began to explain although Amelie hadn't asked or even remembered about the smoke. "They let you take breaks outside for smoking. So I started bumming them off the older inmates just so I could get a breath of fresh air. It's amazing how they can make you feel... less alone. Less overwhelmed."

"I see." Amelie said lightly. Her parents had always strongly warned her about drugs and peer pressure. But this was different. She was different: Gary wasn't pressuring her. Amelie wanted to comfort him so badly. So she lifted up her head from his shoulder.

"Could I try?" Amelie asked earnestly, glancing at the cigarette in his hand.

The boy looked at her with mild confusion. "I'm not sure..."

"Just once. You can't talk them up like that and then not let me at least try it." She demanded boldly.

This produced the familiar smirk back on Gary's face. "Alright, but," he moved his lips to her closely, "Only if you want it," Gary cooed into her ear. The girl tingled with glee at Gary's words, which were the same he had used right before he kissed her for the first time. She couldn't believe it had been earlier that day.

So Gary began to pick out a new cigarette from his pocket when Amelie swiftly plucked the already lit one from his hand, grinning at him. The brunette held it between her third and fourth finger admiringly, watching the ember burn the end of the smoke into blackness. Once she placed it in her mouth, she inhaled deeply and immediately began to cough and sputter the smoke out. Gary howled with laughter at her eagerness and utter failure and put his hands right up to her mouth, taking the cigarette back. Then, he placed it back in his mouth smoothly and stared down into Amelie's curious eyes.

After taking a puff, he turned his head to blow the smoke the other direction and used his hand to put the cigarette back in the girl's mouth. "Slowly, but not too slowly. Let it fill your lungs before you exhale. Nice and deep, now." He guided her, keeping his hand over her mouth.

Oh my God. This is happening. Amelie didn't know whether to feel pleased or distraught that Gary was helping her smoke. It was just so... arousing. Not to mention completely vulnerable. She loved this side of Gary.

With Gary guiding her, Amelie blew out the smoke and accidentally blew it straight into the scarred boy's stunned face. His face contorted into anger, then into a wicked smile. "Oh, baby, do that again," he breathed with a smirk. Amelie obliged, taking another long drag and scattering the smoke across Gary's sharp features. This seemed to turn him on even more.

"Like I said, you don't know what you're doing." he warned suggestively, moving even closer to Amelie's shivering body.

In her dreamlike state, his sentiment was mostly true.

"Maybe that's a good thing."

And the plot thickens! More good stuff to come. You guys are amazing-thanks for reading!