Disclaimer: BioWare owns Mass Effect. 20th Century Fox owns the Alien franchise. EA owns Dark Space.

Hades Nexus Cluster, February 23, 2177

"You just had to get us stuck out in space, didn't you?"

1st Lieutenant Jane Shepard sighed as Rah'Tarram nar Sofis nagged her once more over the communicator as the Human Specter tried to open the airlock access on the outside of the ship, the control panel seemingly damaged by space debris. The ten members of Team Valkyrie had walked from the Administrative Section of the Bridge to the Engineering Section, but had ran into a snag; the bigs knew they were outside. A few of the Xenomorphs could be seen scuttling on the surface of the hull of the Ishimura, though none had made an attempt to attack them. Their numbers were few, and they were in no great numbers, usually in packs of three or so. Still, the knowledge that the bugs could survive the extreme rigors of space had left an icy chill in Shepard's heart. Had she truly killed the bugs on LV 426, or could they survive that as well? At the very least, she made it impossible for anyone else to land upon the moon of Acheron to attempt to gain the alien for nefarious purposes. There was that, at least.

"If you've got any bright ideas, Rahe, I'm all ears." Shepard replied, trying to fight against her shortening temper. The whole time they walked on the Ishimura she had done her best to look at the hull and her feet, trying to think of herself on a planet, doing her best not to look up into the stars. Aegis VII was somewhat in view, but perhaps 70% of the view was still space, sending tremors in her heart whenever she looked about for signs of Xenomorphs… and found herself looking out into the void. The terror that gripped her whenever she did so was threatening to overwhelm her constantly, though with Tela Vasir's help, she was able to at least be functional. She couldn't afford to flip her shit right now. "Cur? Tibevius? Porol? Anything that you can think of that could help us?" The Volus Specter Recruit, Salarian Specter Recruit, and Turian Pilot were by her, each looking at the mechanism in question, which had suffered what looked to be a micro-meteor strike at some point in time. The mechanism itself was damaged, and none of them were able to access the small VI to activate its software to gain access inside. The physical mechanism itself was damaged as well.

Shepard looked at the read-out on the HUD of her Kuwashii Visor to see how much air she had remaining and pursed her lips.

"Unless we blast the door open, we're not going in." Tibevius Victonius finally replied, the Turian pilot crouched by the mechanism like Shepard was, studying it with his eyes and testing it with his hands. Tibevius, thank the Gods, had evidently been something of a Turian version of a shadetree mechanic, good with his talons when it came to physical manipulation of mechanical things. Rahe had given it her best as well, but neither the Turian nor the Quarian were able to provide a fix to counteract the damage to the mechanism. The pilot had a point; they were either going to have to blow the airlock, or move to another one.

Blasting it open might not solve their problems, and an explosion might just bring the bugs to them in swarms.

"There's another airlock on this Section, according to the schematics." Dr. Liara T'soni spoke up, having accessed her Omnitool and began looking at the physical layout of the ship, making herself useful in other ways while they stared at the denied entrance. "It is not far, approximately a kilometer, but we do not know what we might find if we go there." Shepard understood what the Protheanologist was getting at; it was a gamble. The next airlock might not give them issues at all. It might be damaged. It could be swarming with drones. Shepard didn't ask how much air was remaining for the others; she was pretty sure that the Human suits held less than the others, she remembered hearing about that at one point of time. "Specter Shepard… Bastila is worried about her air supply. She's got forty-two minutes. Will that be enough?"

"She's doing better than me. I've got thirty-nine." Sergeant Rita Vrataski snorted, the N3 non-plussed. "It'll be tight, but she'll have minutes to spare."

"How many minutes? I'm down to thirty-seven." Ellen Ripley asked, holding her A-33 Ardat Submachine Gun in both hands competently, her tone even. Despite not being a soldier, Ripper had been in space and hairy situations longer than anyone save Tela Vasir, and her composure showed it. Full Metal Bitch was obviously doing some calculations in her head, the trained Special Forces soldier having done something like this in the Villa. Shepard knew the courses, and what one had to do to earn each separate one. For the N1 Course, it was to conquer doubt by pushing an N Candidate through a brutal obstacle course that would fatigue and drain a Candidate beyond the breaking point, to push a Marine or a Sailor further then they had ever gone… and then make them go that much further. The N1 course had the highest failure rate at 80%, so many simply giving up from sheer exhaustion and the weight of their own doubts of their limitations, which was the point of the Course. Five weeks were spent building a Candidate's confidence level so that when they tackled the obstacle course, they were at least in physical shape to do it, as well as possessing the willpower to drive their body's beyond their capabilities.

The N3 course was worse; surviving a space environment in a hard suit where one must meet an objective with just enough air to reach the goal… as long as the Candidate didn't panic. To conquer fear.

"Thirty-two minutes. We've got the time." Full Metal Bitch replied a second later, nodding her helmeted head, having been trained to survive and deal with such situations. That was why Humanity's N's were so celebrated, elevated above all others in the military; they had literally been through the worst that the Alliance Military could throw at them, and came out still standing. They had conquered what crippled others; doubt, selfishness, fear, emotion, pride, indecisiveness, and finally ego. The Courses were designed to forge a warrior into the perfect weapon of lethality and leadership, to turn a man or woman into something that others could look up to, to inspire confidence and success in the worst of situations. While there were N Teams, like Team Dingo and her Pop's own team, Team Dauntless, N's were sprinkled through the Alliance Military so that regular Sailors and Marines could see what one could achieve. Shepard, of course, grew up with the N's, and fully knew what they were capable of. In many ways, she was capable of many of the same things, having known them and heard of them, as well as begging various members of her Pop's team to do some of the crazier things they were involved in.

Shepard looked at her remaining air supply read-out on her HUD and did her best not to make a sound at the disheartening number.

"We not getting any pretty standing here talking about it. Let's move out." Humanity's First Specter ordered, never having voiced her own precious reserve of breathable air. Shepard knew that it was possible to survive another few minutes after the gauge rang out as long as one didn't mind breathing a quickly growing amount of carbon dioxide, poisoning themselves with the odorless, colorless, lethal combination that would have a human feel sick and go unconscious in a matter of two minutes inside a suit. Shepard began to walk towards the objective, the marker put up on her HUD for her to follow, deeming it necessary to keep silent to conserve her oxygen. They were already in space, where traveling on foot would be slower and more exhausting. Gods help her if they actually ran into an obstacle of some sort. The others followed her studiously as she began to lead when she felt a trickle come through the bond that she and Tela Vasir shared. Damn, she should have known the Thessian would have figure it out.

Dhan'rana, you did not say how much air you had left. Tela pointed out through their bond, the Asari Specter a testament to her species' wisdom and her own powers of observation gleaned from decades and centuries of investigations and crime-busting. Is… is it bad?

Twenty-nine minutes. Shepard finally replied, walking along the hull of the Ishimura on her mag-lock boots, traveling half as fast as she would be if she were in a normal environment. Don't say a word, Tela. They will panic and waste time… time I don't have. I know what a human body can take, how long I truly have. You might have to drag me in, but I'll survive it if everyone is keeping their head in the game.

JANE! Tela's thoughts were loud, reverberating in her head as loud as a bell, a flash of fear and worry shooting through the bond. Jane! We can blast the airlock! We can go through where we just were!

And empty the atmosphere out of the Engineering Section for how deep inside? Alerting the bugs? It could be a death trap for all we know. Shepard reasoned, still walking towards the next airlock. That might get us all killed, Tela. This… only I am in real danger. I will not get others killed due to my own reckless selfishness. The bond went silent between them as Shepard continued to walk towards the next waypoint, seeing the meters slowly eaten away as the timer on her HUD continued to count down, reaching twenty-four minutes and fifteen seconds. She was disturbed by the lack of emotions feeding through the bond between her and the Thessian, and it hurt her though she knew she had no one to blame but herself. Tela? Tela? I… I am sorry. But I am responsible for all of you. I could not make the decision that could endanger us all just because I was the one in danger. Remember what you told me of Aleea D'hana? How she sacrificed herself to save you and your Commando Sisters? She did it out of love, she did it out of selflessness. She didn't want the thought of being responsible for any more deaths other than her own. I understand why she did it.

If the time comes, I will carry you. The Asari Specter promised, her tone muted through the bond, yet the power behind it… it wasn't words. It was a promise.

Thank you, Tela. I… I love you. Admitting it should have been easier, as they were bonded and were lovers, yet Shepard couldn't help feeling that hitch, that obstacle in her heart. She had never said the words to anyone before save to her own mother and Captain Anderson, her Pop. To her, love meant unequivocal trust, someone she knew that could absolutely be counted upon. Did she love the Thessian, the blue alien woman that had unexpectedly come into her life some three months prior? How many assassination attempts did they survive together? How many obstacles did they conquer? Her own humanity seemed to fight against the thought of giving herself to a being of a completely different species, born on a different planet, whose blood was a different color and skin wasn't even of the same flesh as her own. Yet Tela Vasir had always stood steadfast by her side, patient and kind, every step of the way. The Asari Specter had even admitted some of her darkest secrets and fears to Shepard, something she had never done with anyone else. Tela truly did love her… and Shepard was determined to fight her own biology, to earn it. I am sorry for the grief I cause you, the worry that I instill.

It is who you are, Jane Shepard; a leader of your kind, selfless and brave. The Thessian replied a few moments later, her tone still muted, yet thoughtful. To love you, I must accept that this is who you are, what you are. You are the daughter of warriors, raised by warriors, and that was what you wished to be as a child. That is one of the reasons why I am so intrigued by you, endeared by you; you are a paragon of your own kind. To take that away from you would be to take what is good in you. If I am to be yours as you are mine, I must accept that you will be the foolhardy Maiden that takes unacceptable risks and dangerous actions to prove herself to others. I guess we know who holds the wisdom in this relationship.

Yeah, okay, I earned that one. Shepard chuckled to herself as they continued walking along the hull, and she looked towards Aegis VII, seeing where a small portion of the planet had been carved by the planet-fracker, the ring of debris encircling the planet thick. I was thinking… we should take a trip somewhere. You and me. Somewhere nice. Gods know I've never been much of a planeteer. Any recommendations? Earth is a little discouraged at the time; filled with bigots, civil war, the usual.

There is a place… the Asari Specter began but went silent, her thoughts a little jumbled, there is a place that I visited once, and would wish to see again before I pass on. It is on a mountain, and the way the sun sets upon this mesa, the way it changes the colors of the sky at twilight… but it is impossible, I'm afraid. I'll never be able to see it again.

Where is it at? Shepard asked, curious.

The Kel'she Ma'yah Mountain Ranges on Rannoch, the Quarian Homeworld. The Thessian admitted sheepishly, seemingly a little embarrassed. My mother took me there once, and we shared a sunset there, my last good memory of her. I had always intended to go after she passed on, but always had an excuse not to. When the Morning War occurred, I knew the place was lost to me forever, and I regretted the excuses I made not to go and visit, to honor my mother. Still, I have it in my memories, and if there was a place I could visit again above all others, it would be the Kel'she Ma'yah Mountain Ranges, a place my mother loved, as do I.

That's… romantic, actually. The Human Specter replied through the bond. You'll have to show me that memory, if that is okay with you. I… don't have anything that great about the few years that I was on Earth, since I was mostly in school and training in Annapolis, but the one thing I do like to remember is the Statue of Liberty. It may not seem impressive to you, a three hundred year old copper statue standing on an island in a bay, but what it represented for years was a promise and an idea. I got to look at her before they tore it down; some asshole went and stole her head. Fuckers. She looked at her HUD, the Visor giving off the distance remaining to the waypoint… and her remaining oxygen levels. Some five hundred meters to go… and twelve minutes left.

She wasn't going to make it.

One hundred meters. One minute.

1st Lieutenant Jane Shepard did her best to fight the growing panic that was building in her heart, the terror that wished to seize her, as the minute counter on the HUD of her Kuwashii Visor reached zero, and all that remained were the seconds. An alarm was ringing in her head as her HUD began to flash red, alerting her of the danger she was in, not helping matters. She knew that everything she was feeling now was being shot through her bond with Specter Tela Vasir, the Asari undoubtedly feeling the panic the Human Specter felt growing inside of her as the countdown spiraled downward to its inevitable conclusion. Perhaps Tela was right; perhaps she was nothing more but a foolhardy Maiden who thought herself invincible. It was a strength, to be sure, but it was also a character flaw. She could only flaunt fate so many times before she gambled and lost.

50 seconds.

Tela? Tela? I'm almost out of time… Shepard did her best not to panic, to fight the storming emotions that were beginning to seethe within her as the alarm continue to ring and her HUD continued to flash red with each passing second. I'm… I'm scared, Tela.

We're close, Jane. The Asari Specter reasoned, her calming influence a poor barrier against the panicking terror that grew within her, Shepard doing her best to keep her breathing even, from wasting more oxygen than was necessary. She knew the math behind it; it had been taught in Annapolis. She could hold her breath for two minutes. Every breath past 0% would increase the carbon dioxide content by .4%. She wouldn't be sucking in the much-needed oxygen to fuel her body, but she would be expelling the very lethal carbon dioxide that would poison her. The human body could only withstand 1.6% concentration.

Four breaths with no oxygen. She had perhaps three minutes until she went unconscious and her own unconscious mind would poison itself by trying to breath in a lethal environment. Three minutes past 0% to make 84 meters.

Slow breaths, Jane. Slow, deep breaths. The Thessian advised her calmly as Shepard willed herself not to try to run on the hull, her mag-lock boot preventing the action, but also to keep her heart rate and breathing rate down. She had to be as calm as possible with her last remaining oxygen supply. Shepard briefly wondered if this was how Death Row Inmates felt on their long walk to the firing squad, their final moments a stroll to a concrete room with five men armed with assault rifles to end their life.

30 seconds.

Nononono… panic was like a beast lunging at her, her brain unable to ignore the red alarm or beeping warning as Shepard's air supply dropped even further, sweat beading her forehead as she tried not to take short, shallow, panicky breaths; a surefire way to burn through her breathable air. Slow, deep, steady breaths. It was harder to do than it was to think about it. Tela! I'm… oh Gods I can't do it I can't I can't I'm trying…

Slow. Deep. Steady. Breaths. The Asari's voice rang through the bond, fighting the terror that Shepard felt as she felt an arm loop through hers. She looked over to see Tela walking beside her, her Specter-armored arm holding her own, keeping her promise; to carry her through. Tell me of your sire, John Shepard. Tell me how he died.

He… he… he flew into a Turian Dreadnaught, right into their engines. Jane answered, fear still gripping her as she tried to focus on the thought of a man she had only met in pics and stories from her mother and Pop. The Turians were lining a kinetic strike package against New London, to glass the defenders and refugees, our last strongpoint on the colony. 20 seconds. My father… he was one of the last remaining Viper pilots still in the sky, his fighter damaged, his weapons not strong enough to make a difference. 15 seconds. He flew into the Wrath of Apien's engines, destroying two and severely damaging the ship, setting it off course and making it go into emergency maneuvers to prevent it from burning into Shanxi. He saved the colony and wreck the Turian's last dreadnaught. Because of him, we fought them to a bloody standstill… and ended the First Contact War. 10 seconds. To this day, Shanxi and the Battlestar Oregon still honor my father's memory… and I've heard told that on Palaven, there is a list of honored enemies whose name is memorialized for their bravery and courage, that the name 'Widowmaker' can be found there. 5 seconds. Thank you, Tela. I love you.

0%

Lieutenant Jane Shepard took her last breath of oxygen as the tank in her Serrice Counsel armor shut off, no more breathable air to give as the HUD on her Visor remained stark red, reading 0.00.00 time remaining, the ringing alarm now just a single continuous tone, like the flatline of a heart monitor. She held her breath, gulping as much useable oxygen as she could into her lungs, to prolong her fragile chances. The first fifteen seconds were nothing as she kept walking, keeping pace with the Asari Specter that walked by her side in space, the Thessian's arm holding her tight. Thirty seconds, and her lungs began to burn, her body crying out for another fresh breath, yet Shepard willed herself to hold on, knowing that her time was running out. She squeezed her eyes shut as she concentrated on the impossible; for willpower to defeat biology. Every second she held her breath would be another second her brain wouldn't be damaged from apoxia; lack of oxygen, brain death. Thirty-five seconds, and the burning sensation was spreading throughout her body, much like the panic was. Still she put one foot in front of the other as her hands trembled, squeezing shut to fight off the desperate need for air. Forty seconds, and her vision swarmed as colors began to explode from behind her eyelids, almost florescent in color as her brain panicked and screamed for air. Forty-one seconds. Forty-two seconds. Burning. Throbbing. Needing. Forty-four seconds. Screaming. Agony. Forty-five. Forty-six.

At fifty-one seconds, Lieutenant Jane Shepard gulped for a breath that wouldn't come, and choked.

Unbridled terror permeated her thoughts as Shepard gasped and choked, her body spasming as she tried to draw another breath, expelling carbon dioxide into her suit and drawing in the poisonous gas that the human body could only deal with in extremely small portions. Her hands went to her armored gorget, for her protected throat as her body seized and her heart rate rocketed towards tachycardia, thrumming at a hundred and eighty beats per minute almost instantly. Panic and terror washed over her as she plunged into the void of fear, immersed in a deathly environment, her mind knowing that it was over as she drew another oxygenless breath, breathing in almost a full percent of carbon dioxide… making her gag as her lungs tried to force the lethal gas from itself, entering asphyxiation. Her body no longer moved on its own accord as she began to spasm and flail, the panic had taken over her completely. She cried out, her communicator still on as she screamed in fear and terror, begging for help as she exhaled more carbon dioxide, three times more than with any normal yell due to the higher concentration and limited volume inside her suit. Her next gulp was short and painful; it burned her lungs as no oxygen was taken in, nothing to breath in as she ingested 2.1% of carbon dioxide… .5% more than the human body could take and survive. The combination of apoxia, asphyxiation, and tachycardia had Shepard's mind in a blind panicking terror as she let out her final words, a gulping scream that came out both as a cough and regurgitation as her stomach expelled its contents in the body's final blind fight against death itself. Yet it was also its deathstroke; there was nothing else. Nothing at all. Shepard's heart seized in her chest as her brain desperately, in its last and final moment, shut itself down into a low-powered state, cutting off the body to protect itself, to give itself its precious eight minutes of survival in the hopes it could be revived before cerebellum cells began to breakdown, the brain frying itself in order to survive. Her entire body locked up into a floating fetal position as every muscle contracted violently, folding upon itself in a final fetal position for protection as the body withered inward, the heart giving its last voice, a final heart beat that had no brother.

1st Lieutenant Jane Catherine Shepard had died.

A/N: So the title, based on The Police song, was not quite what you were expecting, was it?

In this chapter, I go a little into the N Courses, or my version of them. I haven't read anything that really describes them, either in Mass Effect or in FanFiction, though there are hints and ideas. I went for the idea where each course is really a trial; to defeat failure in each aspect. Doubt, selfishness, fear, emotion, pride, indecisiveness, and ego are each of the Courses, and each one has a trial specifically geared to defeat what makes us fail for normal reasons. If you don't think these are true, then I suggest you take boxing as a hobby, and you'll learn very quickly. I had a football coach in high school who use to express that the '100% commit' in a tackle was one of the hardest things to do because your body and mind doesn't want to fail nor injure itself. To fully launch yourself at a running target isn't an aspect of physicality, but mentality, and takes not only training, but you basically conquering yourself and your own limitations. The Bastard (my nickname for him) is absolutely correct, and I use to teach his very techniques in the Army for other purposes, to help my soldiers push themselves past their own mental blocks and doubts.

In the Mass Effect series, someone indeed steals Lady Liberty's head, as seen in Kasumi's Stolen Memories DLC, owned by Donovon Hock. I don't remember the year it happened, but I have to where Shepard sees the Lady in her full glory before the head is stolen and the statue taken down and sold for scrap, which is in canon.

If you've never almost died, died but came back, or having almost drowned (and I mean like gulping water for oxygen drown) the absolute terror that comes is beyond measure. It is violent, a living thing that defeats all. The written word will never capture that final moment that grips everything and pulls you under. If you've never experienced it, be fortunate.

And if this chapter didn't pull at your heartstrings… I know I was floored the first time I played Mass Effect 2.