Hope everone likes my new chap! lots of drama to come i promise! Please review..thanks..chad you rule and I love ya!

Also I'd like to dedicate this chapter to my bf Adam..your a sweetheart and thanks for making valentines day perfect for me baby! Love ys lots!

2 weeks later

Time passed and everyone dealt as best as they could with Lucas being gone. Winter break was over and it was time to return to high school and suffer through whatever boring lectures were planned. Or for some just sleep through them.

"Nathan get up you have school," yelled Debb.

Nathan jammed his pillow over his head and tried to ignore his mom's orders. He wasn't ready to face school yet. He had slept most of his break away and ignored everyone around him. He groaned as he heard the loud footsteps of his mom coming up the stairs.

"Nathan honey you have to get up," Debb said as she shook Nathan out his sleep. "You have to get out the house you have been cooped up her since Luke's funeral."

"Leave me alone," groaned Nathan.

"Not until you get up and get ready for school," insisted Debb.

"I'm not going," moaned Nathan, still not opening his eyes.

Debb felt bad for her son. He was hurting and she didn't know what to do that would make it better. She sat on the edge of his bed and rubbed his back softly.

"Lucas would have wanted you to move on with you're life," she said softly trying not to upset him. "He wouldn't have wanted you to waste away in your room forever."

Nathan moved his pillow from his face and met his mom's eyes. "How do I move on mom?" Nathan asked as he held back the tears that were forcing their way out. "He was my brother and I treated him like Shit. He was always there for me and I always was a jerk. He died for me mom."

Debb grabbed Nate in a hug. "I know it hurts baby but you need to find a way to say goodbye," she insisted. "He's gone baby and you cant do anything to change that."

Nathan remained silent as his mom comforted him.

"Going to school is the first step to moving on," added Debb. "You're friends will be there to talk to. Haley too! You can help each other through the hardest of times. Please go and get out the house sweety. Try to move on a little."

"I'll try," agreed Nathan.

meanwhile...

Peyton pulled up to school, got out her car and refused to talk to any of her friends. Everyone she cared about ended up leaving her so she just decided being alone was her best bet. It would save herself the pain of losing another person she loved.

She walked quickly through the doors at Tree hill high never looking back at Brooke or Haley. They were positioned on the picnic booth outside.

Brooke turned away in sadness when her best friend just passed her up without even words. She knew Peyton took it hard when Luke died but that didn't just excuse the fact that she dropped everyone with the flick of a hat. She wasn't the only one hurting.

"School won't be the same anymore," commented Haley.

Brooke just nodded, whenever they talked about Lucas it just upset her. It had been 2 weeks and still when ever his name was brought up she found herself in tears.

"Me and Karen are fixing up his grave later," Haley said softly. "You want to help?"

"I'm kind of busy," lied Brooke.

"Doing what?" snapped Haley.

"Um...cheerleading practice," she answered.

"Oh," Haley said meanly." Excuse me for asking I just figured Lucas was more important then throwing a pair of pom poms in the air," Haley got up from the bench. "My mistake." Haley left without another word and headed for class. Everyone had been really snappy and on edge lately.

"Haley," yelled Brooke. It was to late though she had already started into the building. It wasn't that cheering was more important to her, hell it was the last thing on her mind! She just couldn't bring herself to his grave, she wasn't ready to face the obvious yet. She could barley look at a picture of him without bursting into tears, it was just too soon.

meanwhile...

Nathan walked down the bridge on the way to school, the one Lucas always took. It was quiet and he was all alone, the way he wanted it. He kicked a small stone down the pavement as he walked. He had kicked it too hard and it rolled off the edge. Nathan just sighed and leaned against the guardrail. Looking over the edge was surreal, it was so high!

He took a deep breath of the fresh air, and looked down. Ice was frozen over the water completely. As he spotted it it brought back images from that night. Images he would rather forget.

Flashback

"Lucas breathe," cried Nathan.

Keith shook Lucas hard and blowed air into his lungs. "Come on kid breathe."

Nathan grabbed Luke's arm in his hand. It was limp and lifeless which frightened him. "Breathe Dammit," screamed Nathan.

"The ambulance are here," yelled Keith.

A group of paramedics came running across the court to Luke's aid. A tall lean guy knelled next to him and felt for a pulse."No pulse," Nathan remembered the guy screaming to his partners.

Nathan and Keith watched in awe as the paramedics tried frantically to revive Lucas. Nothing looked to be working. They watched as Lucas slipped away as the seconds passed, drifting into a never ending sleep.

The paramedics leaned back in defeat. The tall guy looked back to Nathan and Keith in comfort. Both Nathan and Keith knew it was over.

"This can't happen,"Nathan freaked. " NO."

Keith grabbed the young boy in his arms and tried comforting the hurting boy. "It's ok," he whispered as Nathan cried into his chest.

"It should have been me," cried Nathan. "It should have been me not him."

"Shhhh...don't say that,' said Keith. "It wasn't you're fault there was nothing else we could have done."

Reality

Nathan found himself stepping on the guardrail when he snapped out his thoughts. His feet were stepping up on the metal and he was holing onto a beam. He was literally leaned over the edge.

Nathan looked over the edge. It would end all the pain if he just jumped. He would be with his brother and be happy.

He reluctantly stepped back. His feet were planted on firm ground again. He grabbed his back back from the ground and started walking to school again. He couldn't believe he actually considered jumping!

It's back to school and emotions are on the edge. Haley tries talking to Nathan, Peyton further and further from reality. Can Brooke bring herself to acknowledge Lucas or will she keep avoiding anything involving him? Can Nathan move on with his life or is he just moving backwards?