A/N: Hello, my people! I figured that since more than 100 of you read through the first session on release, I could be a bit arrogant and give session two an early post. I don't know what you all expect out of this series, but frankly I don't care. Don't take it the wrong way, though, since I'm able to produce this quality of work through selfish means. It's kind of like a government: nobody wants it there, but everything would fall apart without it. Did I mention that I'm mildly sociopathic? Well now you all know. Anyways, today's session is focused around the question of "What is the real rivalry between Shen and Zed?" and why the counselor is only getting difficult cases today; wait, never mind the latter issue. I don't really have much else for you all. If there's any cases that you'd like to see in this series, please send me a message or leave a comment about it!
-Clang- -Clink- -Whoosh-
The sounds of clashing metal and magic does not bode well for the next pair of champions today. I sigh in disappointment and leave my desk to address my clients directly. However just as I open the door, two [Razor Shuriken] fly over my head and stick into the door. I look at the two projectiles in fear, but turn around again to face the champions. Instinctively, I drop to the floor again in time to narrowly dodge a stray [Vorpal Blade]. In the center of all the flying steel that was once the waiting room, two ninjas are 'arguing' in a violent manner. The spectators, mere minions who happen to be my office staff, are huddled together in fear at my secretary's desk. I instantly know who the two feuding ninjas are, since they are also part of my next meeting. With a stern focus and glowing eyes, Shen shows his prowess as the 'Eye of Twilight' by using a [Feint] to avoid a [Shadow Slash] from Zed, the 'Master of Shadows'. These two champions have a decades-long rivalry from what I've studied, but I plan to resolve it today.
"Hahahaha! Come Shen, show me how pitiful you've become!" Zed mocks.
"Your shadows shall fall hollow before my judgment." Shen responds, not losing his unnerving calm.
"Restraint...is fatal." Zed suddenly disappears in a whirl of shadows, laughing lowly as he nears me with unmatched speed.
"We [Stand United]." Shen starts a chant as I am surrounded by magical energies, shielding me from Zed's [Death Mark].
I step back into my office, terrified at the attempt on my life just now. Without any further hesitation, I lock myself inside and dive behind my desk for safety. Having reached this level of violence, I look for a special button that I had installed for 'unruly clients'. Just underneath my desk I see it, marked with the word 'Winions'. I push the button, triggering an alarm in the office, which abruptly stops the fighting sounds outside. I almost had to use my full resources for the last case, but my connection with Swain proved more useful. Against Shen and Zed, there's only one champion I can use as leverage, but even she's not a reliable mediator.
So as a last resort, I have to rely on Super Minions. From the sounds of smashing and generally pained grunting, it seems that they are taking care of Shen and Zed's dispute. I open the office door to see both champions on the floor in a mangled state, barely able to move. The lead Super Minion, dressed in a gray robe, nods his head respectfully at me and leaves the office with his platoon of twenty Super Minions. After making sure that the two champions are no longer a threat, my staff reluctantly go back to their duties as if nothing had happened at all.
"Well then, shall we finally get started on discussing your issues in a civilized manner?" I ask the injured ninjas, handing them both a bag of health potions.
"Now, please start from the beginning. Tell me why you two are really fighting..." I ask the two men, now sitting tensely in chairs facing me.
"It all started when we were children. Zed and I were my father's greatest-" Shen begins but I cut him off.
"Stop right there. I've already read both of your files from the League. You don't have to lie about your rivalry in here. You both are free to speak about what really happened. I promise you that nothing you say will ever leave this office." I raise my hand as if making a pledge to show my commitment to that statement.
"Okay, I will not hide it anymore then." Zed speaks up this time.
"Zed, we both know that you were always living in my shadow." Shen narrows his eyes with the slightest of movements, but keeps his voice steady.
"And through living in the shadows, I've become much more of a warrior than you could ever hope to be." Zed's light tone suggests that he's mocking Shen once again.
"I, however, have much more of a chance at my goal since I'm still in the Kinkou." Shen counters, earning an irritated grunt from his rival.
"You were always one for taking the easy way out, when it is solitude that's far more attractive..."
Zed rises out of his seat and glares at the other ninja, leaning in with killer intent. I simply move my eyes back and forth at the exchange, somewhat lost as to what the two champions are actually arguing about. Finding a good spot to interrupt, I lower my hand between them and direct their attention back to me.
"Um...what exactly are you guys talking about?" I plainly ask with confusion.
"Who Akali likes more, what else?" They both answer at the same time, looking at me like I just asked what Rammus says.
"Hold on for second.", I interrupt the men just before they start arguing again, "You mean to say that you two have been trying to impress Akali this whole time?"
"Yes, ever since we were children, we've been vying for Akali's affections." Zed answers first.
"Yet you've always been overlooked while I have saved Akali countless times." Shen smirks under his mask, a playful light in his eyes.
"She favors wolves over dogs, Shen." The shadowy ninja taunts.
Jeez, these two are going to go all day with this if I allow it. I need to get them to focus on something else...
My thoughts all point to this one conclusion unless I can break their monotony.
"Excuse me for a moment, gentlemen. Feel free to challenge each other in a friendly game of Sudoku." I announce as I hand them both a copy of Black Belt Sudoku before stepping out of my office.
With practiced grace and boundless wisdom, I breathe a deep breath and try to make a mental connection with Akali. It's a trying effort that require great concentration, but I eventually get an answer; however, it's not exactly who I wanted.
"Hello? You need speed?" The squeaky voice that answers my call is undoubtedly that of Kennen, the 'Heart of the Tempest'.
"Sorry Kennen, but could you pass the connection to Akali? I didn't mean to call for you." I try to explain.
"Okay, hold on!" He doesn't seem at all offended, probably because he's a Yordle.
"...Yes? Do you have need of me, Counselor?" The 'Fist of Shadow' answers with a soft, yet piercing voice.
"Ah, I was wondering if you would be able to come by my office to help me resolve an issue between two champions." I don't use Shen and Zed's names for good measure.
"Understood. I shall do as balance dictates."
The call ends, a link having been established with both Kennen and Akali. I really don't understand what Shen and Zed see in that woman, but it's not my place to judge. While thinking about my clients' weird tastes, I open my office door only to find growing piles of Sudoku books in front of both champions. I stand in awe at the speed by which both men are finishing each book. I knew ninjas were fast, but I had no idea how intelligent they really were. Shen is the first to notice me and puts down his book and pencil.
"Hello, Counselor. Zed and I were just finishing up our 'friendly competition'. Is everything alright?" Shen's stoic expression is a stark contrast to my utter shock.
"Uh, yeah. Everything's...fine.", I choke out as I sit back at my desk, "I suggest you both clean this up, since I just called for Akali to be here."
Suddenly, the sounds of pencils against paper stops and both champions' eyes gleam with realization. Before I know it, I see the two men working together to dispose of all the completed Sudoku books. Shen slices away at both piles of books while Zed opens a shadow portal and deposits the shredded pieces of paper. In seconds, the piles of books that gathered on my desk are now gone, the ninjas having erased any evidence of their Sudoku games.
"Wow, these two can really work together when they need to..." I accidentally say aloud.
"Indeed, a rare display." Akali's voice suddenly comes from behind me.
"Gah! How long have you been standing there!?" I nearly jump out of my chair when I see the female ninja hovering over me.
"I arrived as soon as you entered your office. I had hidden myself since then." Akali calmly explains, taking a seat between Zed and Shen.
"You both knew?" I ask the men before me.
"Yes, her presence is not difficult to detect." They both answer simultaneously.
"Ahem, right. The reason I called you here, Akali, is because these two have something to say...to...you...?" I trail off after seeing both Shen and Zed quivering in their seats.
"Speak, you two." Akali calmly orders.
"Akali, we want to know...er...who...you..." Zed stumbles through the confession, nodding for Shen to take over.
"Who I...?" Akali starts to piece it together.
"...Who you find more attractive between Zed and I." Shen finishes the confession without pausing, somehow holding his focus while in this stressful situation.
"...This is some kind of joke, yes? You two can't possibly-"
Akali stops talking as soon as she sees the anticipation coming from both men.
"I only consider the two of you as friends, nothing more. While I may have harbored some possible feelings for Shen as a child and Zed when he left the Kinkou, I do not feel anything like that now for either of you." Akali talks with conviction, and very little regret.
"Akali...please explain further." Shen shakily squeaks out.
"Yes, I would also like to know...what you mean." Zed's low voice is a bad sign for his confidence at the moment.
"Shen, when we were children, I was often amazed at how quickly you mastered every technique that was taught to us. You were essentially the 'big brother' that everyone looked up to, especially myself. I admired how much you were willing to sacrifice for the sake of others.", Akali then turns to face Zed, "Zed, you used to live in Shen's shadow and go unnoticed. Then you left for years, improving your own skills. I never knew just how hard you really fought and I only started to appreciate it after you joined the League. You always strike quickly and with deadly force, something I've always been attracted to..."
"So that means..." I start off, trying to ease the tension in the room.
"While I favor someone who is not afraid to dive headfirst into battle, I also want someone who is able to protect me just as well." Akali admits trying not to look at her fellow champions.
"Wait, that means..." Shen and Zed come to the same realization as there is a pounding on my office door.
-Thwack-
"Ouch. Excuse me, is Lady Akali here?"
Standing in the doorway is the 'Blind Monk', Lee Sin. Without missing a step, he bows perfectly to everyone in the room before taking a standing spot behind Akali's chair.
"I apologize for wasting everyone's time. Shen, Zed...I guess I shall see you both in the future...?" Akali awkwardly tells them as she walks out with Lee Sin, the relationship between them being quite obvious to everyone present.
"Oh my, that's a shocker even for me. I'm really sorry to put you both through that, but I just wanted to help you two resolve your rivalry. I never realized how deep it actually ran between you." I timidly apologize after a long silence.
"It's...okay, Counselor. I think what's best is that Shen and I take some time for meditation somewhere, right?" Zed tries to steer the conversation elsewhere.
"Yes, and most likely a cold drink..." Shen sullenly adds.
"Let's go, friend. We've got a long night ahead of us."
With his arm draped over his friend's shoulder, Zed walks with Shen out of my office to mend their broken hearts. I feel bad for the pair, mostly since I've somehow made them lose their purpose for being in the League. Against my duties, I lock the door to my office after walking out behind the two champions. They turn to me, surprised, as I check the lock.
"I'd love to have a drink with you both if possible. I can also give you two some advice to move on from Akali."
"Thank you, Counselor. It means a lot to us that you'd go so far to help." Shen agrees.
His eyes brighten considerably as he walks forward with Zed, finally feeling a lot lighter now that he doesn't have to fight with the shadowy ninja all the time. However, a few dozen sparring matches here and there would still be a constant, no matter how much they've become friends.
A/N: If you wanna blame me for not making this action-y, go ahead. However, it's a pretty realistic situation that hits home if anyone's gone through stuff like this with friends. Don't worry though, this case is not over yet and will definitely not end in tragedy! I've got bigger plans for Shen and Zed in the future, so you all can expect to see them again. Next chapter comes from a suggestion I got from a reader who goes by the name of 'farejojor' (of Germany, it seems), and he asked for me to do something on Vi and Jinx addressing their possible family relationship. So, next chapter will answer the question: "Are Vi and Jinx really sisters?"