Spike felt the tremor in her body as the doors shut. It was delightful to feel her quiver. His predatory instincts flared and he took a deep breath, pulling in her scent. The heady aroma of her arousal played on his strained control. It was one thing to resist the demands of mating when they were dealing with the chaos of their lives, but it was quite different with her willing body in his arms. He looked down at her and smiled. She was biting her lower lip with her lovely white teeth. The defiant, brutal slayer was nowhere to be found. This woman had thrown a flaming organ on him once, but she looked more like a wilting, Victorian maiden than any he had ever laid eyes on. He settled her onto their lushly made bed and traced one finger across her abused lip, coaxing her to release it.
The bond was pushing at him, but he refused to give in to its demands. They would come together his way. No compulsion was going to drive him. Buffy needed him. She would yield whatever he asked at the moment, but he wanted her to surrender to him not the bond. She may have invited him to their bed, but he was going to make her want to stay in it.
"Are you sure, Love?" He pushed his fingers into her hair and trailed them out through the long tresses. She nodded and her gaze dropped to his chest.
"I want to make you happy, but I'm no good at this stuff. I'm sorry." She bit into her lip again. She seemed to shrink into herself with the admission, and he gathered her into his arms. Her body shook as he caressed her back with a steady hand. The bond was working on her. He could feel her tensing as the waves of desire hit.
"Buffy, we can wait." He traced a finger along her jaw, wondering how true the statement was. She was unstoppable in battle, but this fight was complicated. The bond was acting on them, driving them toward each other.
"I don't think I can fight the urges I'm feeling much longer anyway." The words spilled quickly from her lips. "I want it to be us, not the compulsion. I want to give myself to you and know I'm doing it."
Her brave words said in such a timid voice pulled at some part of him. She was a creature of extremes. He pushed her back and tilted her chin up with the gentle pressure of one bent finger. Her green eyes were brighter with unshed tears.
"What's with the waterworks?" He wiped one tear from her cheek after it spilled.
"I'm going to disappoint you and all we will have is compulsion." She scrunched up her face and wiped at her face with her own hand. "I can't even dress up for you. I'm in an old tee shirt. Wow, like that's really inspiring."
"Actually, you, in my shirt are rather inspiring. Watching you move around tonight in my clothing nearly drove me mad. Don't doubt yourself. You, in any scrap of cloth at all or lack of it, are inspiring. You won't disappoint me in any way. I assure you. You are mine. I've done a great deal in my existence, but I have never made love to my mate. This is our last first time. Let me worry about my enjoyment and yours." He leaned forward and kissed her gently. He let his lips caress hers, let them soften and melt against her heat. Her fingers clasped his shoulder convulsively.
He pushed her back onto the blue satin sheets. He had wanted black, but she had smiled at him and insisted on colors. He looked at her golden skin in such vibrant contrast with the cerulean sheets. She had been right. She was alive and vibrant, her surroundings should be as well. He watched as her cheeks flushed with her pumping blood. The beat of her heart, the catch of her breath, the heat radiating from her captivated him. She pulled at the hem of the tee shirt, trying to cover her glorious legs.
Her experience was so limited and really so disappointing. There was no doubt Angelus had been a clod as a lover. He knew she had given him a moment of pure happiness, but he hadn't returned the favor. He was sure of it, but he'd be damned again before he'd ask.
He let his cool palm settle on her ankle. She looked up at him with wide eyes, and shifted to allow him access to her body. He let go of her ankle and smiled reassuringly.
"No rush, Love." He smiled. "I want this to be a bit more, yeah?"
The human had obviously failed her as well. She had no positive experience of what was to come. He thought back over his existence and all of the lovers he'd had in his unlife. He'd never taken a virgin to bed, never deflowered a human victim as he drank her down. His partners had always been the experienced ones.
He looked at Buffy and felt a sudden, startling moment of joy. His living self had longed for this, a woman, inexperienced and shy, looking to him for guidance. This had been the pinnacle of his true desires as a human, his reason for writing the drivel that had filled his sappy mind. Buffy bit her lip again and looked up at him through her lashes, and he found it thrilled him as well. His glorious golden goddess blushed demurely and rubbed her legs together. He could smell her sweet arousal and the slightly acrid scent of her trepidation as they warred for his attention. The dormant poetic voice roared to life in him and he bit down on his own tongue to fight off the urge to woo her with stupid words. He couldn't stand for her to be amused at this sudden rush of things long past.
He bent down and chastely kissed her lips. He felt her tremble for a moment before she threw her arms around his neck. He pulled back and smiled gently at her, feeling the strength in her embrace suddenly give.
"You can't hurt me, Buffy. You don't have to be careful. I want you to feel free." He bent and nipped her bottom lip. She stroked his shoulder with one delicate hand, a hesitant caress. He pulled back and stared down at her once more, golden hair fanned across the cerulean sheets, wide green eyes watching him with such intensity.
"I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to even come close." Buffy whispered. "I think we've both had enough pain."
Her words rocked him. She cared about his pain, cared about his suffering. Everything she had done since the witch had stolen their free will away had served to shock him silly. He dropped a kiss on her lips, quick and sweet. Her hands slid up his arms to his shoulders and pulled him closer to her heat. The furnace of her living body was entrancing. Her skin was soft and flushed as he pushed up on his arms above her.
"I want to see you, Buffy." He pulled at the hem of her tee shirt and waited for her to acquiesce. She bit her lip and gave a nod. He slid his hands slowly beneath the shirt, hooking the hem with his thumbs. The silken slide of her skin under his fingers became the focus of his world. Each golden inch of skin revealed by his own slow movement drove the intensity within him higher. His hands came to rest under the weight of her breasts. The flutter of her heart seemed to double in his ears. He paused and looked into her eyes.
"Go ahead. Take it off." She said quietly. Her eyes darted down their bodies, and she bit her lip. He pushed his hands under her shirt and cupped her breasts in his palms. She panted up at him her eyes flashing to his as he flicked her nipples with his thumb nails. The instant response of her body to his dragged him deeper into the moment. She clutched his shoulders and arched up to him, an inarticulate cry erupting from her lips. He slid one hand around between her shoulder blades and used the other to pull the shirt free of her body, before sliding her back on to the sheets.
"You are a goddess, like sunlight trapped inside a human body." His awed tone brought a rosy blush up her just revealed skin. "The heat of you, this is heaven."
He stretched out next to her and trailed his fingers up her side. She sank her perfect, white teeth into her lower lip and pushed up his shirt until her hands rested against the cool flesh of his waist. Their eyes locked and he felt the flash of her hot breath against his skin.
"I need you to talk, Love. Let me know if something feels good or if it doesn't. Don't be afraid to say any little thing that crosses your mind. It will be better for both of us if you just relax and let go. I want us both so happy we can't quit smiling for days." He touched her side with his whole hand letting the heat of her warm his hand. She looked up at him with a grin.
"I like to talk. You might regret asking me to tell you everything, so don't say I didn't warn you." Buffy slid her hands under his shirt. "I'd like to see you without your shirt."
She giggled as he ripped the shirt off over his head, and her warm hands slid along his abdomen. The intensity in her eyes as they traced his naked torso rocked him. He had seen that look before, when they had fought. Her focus was absolute. He had always enjoyed going at with her, pressing his luck and testing his mettle. Now, he was engaged in a different battle.
"I've never really seen a man like this." Buffy said and her eyes darted to his face. "Not right in front of me. I mean, sure in a movie or two, but never like this."
He leaned on one arm and let her look at his chest. Her hands followed eagerly after her eyes. Time ceased to be measured in minutes. Instead, he measured it with each catch in her breath, every time her tongue slipped out to caress her lips and left them glistening. The idiots that had come before him had missed this, the magic of her desire. This was his alone. He closed his eyes and reveled in the moment as her fingers dipped down under the waistband of his jeans.
"Do you want me to take them off of you?" she asked as she slid her fingers around to the button fly.
"I want you to do what you want. Don't worry about me, Love."
"What if I want to worry about you?" She asked as she pulled him down on to her body. The heat of her flushed skin against his cool chest stimulated his senses further and he felt his face morph. He pulled back from her and tried to roll away.
"Don't," she pulled him to her with a great deal more strength. "I'm not afraid and it's part of you. How can I be comfortable if you can't?"
"I don't want you to feel like you have to feed me. I want to love you as a man." Spike said quietly as he shook of his demonic visage.
"Then don't worry about your face, just worry about mine." She slid her hands down his back to the waist of his jeans. "If I'm smiling, it's all good."
"What about screaming, I think there could be screaming?" He smiled at her and dropped a kiss on to the tip of her nose.
"Screaming might be okay," she blushed. "I'm sure you know more about this than I do."
"I know nothing about doing this with you, and I want to know everything. I want to know every sound you make, what makes you sigh and what makes you scream. I want to know what you look like after I bring you to climax and you realize I'm not through with you yet."
He watched as her eyes widened and her pupils dilated. The heat of her skin and the quick panting breaths she was drawing enticed him and he lowered his head to her shoulder. He cupped the soft undersides of her breasts and traced her collarbone with the tip of his tongue. Her body quivered and she turned her neck, baring the tender flesh he had fed from the night before. It was an innocent offer from a generous spirit, and he felt their connection deepening as he pressed a chaste kiss to the scar.
"Please," she sighed. "Show me. Love me."
Her words rocked him, and he went still, wondering what she meant. It was such a simple request, and yet no other female living or dead had ever asked it of him. Well, she had, but it had been the witch's spell talking, not her true desire. No one had ever taken up for him in the manner she had in the last hours. He nuzzled his face into the crook of her neck as images of her defending him and coming to his aide flooded through him. Loving her would be the easy part, but he knew he would never be satisfied until she said those words and left him with no doubts. He wanted her, all of her.
With a new determination, he slid down her body kissing and occasionally nipping her golden flesh. She whimpered and shifted beneath him, offering him a new delight with every movement.
"I am losing my mind, please," Buffy rolled her shoulders up and their eyes met as he flattened his tongue against the tender skin beneath her belly button. "I want you."
"You have me, Love. Be patient. I'm seeing to you." He grinned up at her and slid down a bit further. Buffy's body tensed under him.
"You don't have to you know. It's okay. I know guys don't like that stuff." She pulled at his shoulders, but he settled in between her thighs.
"Your lovers have been clods. I am going to make you sing." He caught her nervous expression from the corner of his eyes as he dipped down to run his tongue along her inner thigh. Her hands quit pulling at him and he bit back a chuckle as her thighs relaxed around him, allowing him better access.
"Spike, God," she breathed out as he circled the pearl of her womanhood with his tongue.
"Appreciate the raise in status, Love, but I'm still just a vampire." he said as she curled up to look him in the face.
"You are more than just a vampire, Spike. You're my mate. Mine." She wrapped her legs around his shoulders and squeezed him in an odd sort of embrace.
"We belong to each other, Buffy." He dropped his mouth onto her and smiled as she gasped and flopped back against the sheets. He continued to toy with her, trailing his tongue all around. Her breath caught and escaped repeatedly in breathy, little blasts. He started running his cool hands along her thighs, enjoying the play of muscles under silken skin.
He slid one finger up the skin of her inner thigh, enjoying the whimpers escaping from her. Her body was his, her enjoyment at his command. Breaking away from her sodden core, he stared up at her dazed expression with pride. He watched closely as he slid a finger along her drenched curls. Her body stilled and her eyes sought his. He smiled at her and slid his finger into her welcoming depths. She made a strangled sound and flopped back onto the sheets. He pumped his finger into her slowly until she began to rock against his hand.
He pulled his hand away and slid up her sweat slicked body. Their eyes locked as he settled his legs between hers. She was panting, each burst of air washing his face with heat. He lowered his lips to hers and she welcomed him back to her mouth eagerly. Their tongues clashed and swirled as he curved his body and moved into her slowly. She broke their kiss with a gasp.
"Oh my god, Spike," she said. He smirked and shifted his hips.
"Still not a god, but feel free to call me anything you'd like." Buffy tilted her pelvis slightly and he found himself seated deeper in her heat. Her heart beat frantically under his hand.
"I admit I'm relatively inexperienced, but isn't there supposed to be more to this?" She said and nipped his chin. "Don't you want to make me yours?"
He couldn't fight the smile or the odd surge of joy that ran through him as he began to thrust. She was extremely tight, making each movement exquisite torture. Their bodies melded and he felt her quake as she offered him her neck again. He thrust deeply and slid one hand between them to push her over, but she screamed and he felt her body contract on him. She arched under him and dragged his mouth to her neck. He kissed her scar and licked it as he let himself follow her into ecstasy.