CHAPTER 4 ; ALLEN STORY

Had I known what had happened with the cryo-pod I wouldn't have offered to bring the girls to see his body in the pod. I'm their father, I'm supposed to be their hero, their protector. Callie looked at the pod in bewilderment as Tilda bawled against my hip. That look; I couldn't get past it myself. A perfect frosted statue of excruciating intolerable pain. The overseer made a comment that he suspected the med-x dispenser may have malfunctioned. Truth or not, it was enough of a wake-up call to tell me that he was capable of some real evil and I had secured my place on his shit-list on Norm Graves' behalf. I wanted to hate Norm for putting me in this position as I have always been one to adapt and adjust, but my daughters already knew that Norm was a man where I was a weasel. I will never forget when Tilda gave me that look. Callie isn't quite old enough to understand. Tilda sees me for what I am and holds me accountable for how I have behaved. If it weren't for that, I never would have stuck my neck out in the first place. I love my girls more than anything in the world. Olivia had been dead to me since the kids were old enough to walk. I guess I just didn't have room in my heart for her once the girls were here. I want to feel guilty for being so cold, but I don't.

Looking at the pain on Norm's face reminded me of what he had said to me. How I wouldn't want some predator of a man like me to take advantage of my girls' vulnerability to get his slimy rocks off. I can admit to myself that it's taking advantage and is only separated from statutory rape by a number that happens to be high enough. I guess I had done a lot of thinking since speaking with Norman Graves. I'd be willing to turn over a new leaf if I wasn't already in too deep. I had three girls who were "in love" with me. Two of them made it in here. I had at least 5 that I had sex with casually. Of those 5, four of them made it in here. They were not with their families. When they inevitable find out about me, they will have no one but others just like them. They survived because of me. I helped them be selected for vault admission, but I also gave them a false sense of allegiance. As I looked at the agony on Norm's face in that pod, I began to realize that my soul was in just as much pain. I barely made it to the nearest trash can when I vomited. Tilda and Callie came to console me asking me what was wrong.

"I'm just a little sick girls, I'll be okay in a minute." I said in between heaves. As I vomited, I cried for what I had done to Olivia. Maybe I didn't love the Olivia that I essentially killed, but I did love her before. If I had manned up and divorced her so many years ago, maybe she and the girls would be safe and happy in another vault somewhere and I'd be free to bang my little coeds in peace. I can't stop. These girls are going to grow up to hate me. I'm pretty sure Tilda already does.

I wiped my mouth and came up to my feet again. As the smell started to find its way to Callie, she too began to puke all over the floor. Luckily, a Mr. Handy was close by to clean it up. I was busy dealing with Callie so I didn't notice Tilda with her hand on the glass of Norm's frozen cocoon.

"I miss you Norm Graves." Said Tilda.

"Tilda, come away from there!" I snapped as she timidly pulled her away from the glass and walked back over to us.

"Dad, just let Stevious do it." Said Tilda.

"Stevious? How do you know his name?" I asked.

"He came here with us. That's the Graves' Mr. Handy. His name is Stevious." She Replied.

"How do you know it's the same one?" I asked.

"He got shot at when the bad guys killed mommy." Tilda replied as Callie looked doe eyed and began to bawl harder.

"What?! Who killed mommy?" I demanded.

"A boy from her class, his brother, and his dad; they were chasing her to the house and shot her a whole bunch of times." Tilda said as tears welled in her eyes. "Norm told Kelly not to let us look but I saw the whole thing. She took us in the house while Norm and Stevious killed them all."

"Then Kelly killed herself with drugs, but Norm carried her anyway." Said Callie.

"You mean you saw all of this?" I demanded.

They had disclosed to me vague details of the journey to the vault but as the specifics came out I realized I may have passed judgment on Graves before knowing all the details. "Great." I thought to myself. I'm going to be dealing with the sullen Edgar Allen Poe kids that have seen too much. Luckily this was a vault full of professors. We have people for psychology here. Not that these two weren't going to have problems enough having to watch me fulfill my young coed addiction. I knew deep down that no matter how much discretion I attempted to use, this was a captive environment. Word will get to them. Development is key. I may hold a doctorate degree, but I am not a great parent. I will petition to start a council for education and development. I need help here. I won't hold these girls' respect forever.

"I am shocked that the two of you haven't been raving about that since you got here? Why are you so calm about it?" I asked perceivably appalled.

"Daddy, ever since we were old enough to understand stories you and mommy both have been telling us that this War is going to kill the world and that there's a good chance it will kill all of us too. Mommy is the lucky one. She gets to leave before things get really bad. We have to wonder every day if we should be dead." Said Tilda without remorse.

"Tilda, Honey, That is the most depressing and terrible thing that I have ever heard a child say, much less my child! I want to be mad at you but I can't be because you will need that thought process. Tilda, you're going to have to try to be innocent for as long as you can. We paid a lot of money to award you and your sister that chance." I pleaded.

"Daddy, We are young. We don't want to know all of the bad in the world. But when you grow up watching a world at war with the threat of it all ending any day, what do you expect?" Asked Tilda defiantly.

I honestly couldn't believe I was talking to a 9 year old. I needed to know how smart and resilient my little girls were, but their development was obviously beyond me. I was going to need lots of help. The real problem with publicly congregating to mold the minds of the youth was the fact that the overseer would be watching closely. He will demand that we teach whole-hearted allegiance. Suddenly I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders. Then I remembered Vault 52 would be the only world I would likely see.