Chapter 9: Carys

I open my eyes and all I see is darkness, I can hear the stiff pillow beneath my head rustle as I move my head around. As my eyes adjust, I see a dim light shining on familiar red hair. The auburn locks hide Jana's face, which is resting on the pillow next to mine. She moves gently, and then quickly sits up straight looking at me. "You're awake," I don't say anything.

I look around the room lit only by the streetlamps outside and see Rhydian awkwardly curled up on a small armchair. It seems I'm in some kind of hospital. I try to move my hands to rub my eyes, but they don't budge. I've been strapped down like an insane person. I am an insane person. Jana turns the light on, and I look down to see the scratches on my arms and legs, some have been bandaged up. What have I done?

"Shan and Rhydian brought you here, we're at Segolia," she whispers, trying not to wake Rhydian. She hasn't noticed that he's already awake and looking right at me. His eyes are full of sorrow, and a pity that makes my stomach churn. "Do you remember anything? You were tossing and turning in your sleep." I turn my head away from her and look out of the window at the city.

Of course, I remember. How could I possibly forget my mother's warped voice inside my head when? I can still hear her now, just a little bit quieter. It's her voice still, but it's not soft and delicate the way it used to be, it's sharp and vicious. And every word stings. 'We didn't want you either. But now we can change you, and you can be with us.'

When I was young, there were some kids in my school who used to tell me that I was a mistake and that my parents wished I was never born. I sort of developed a complex about it, which is why it's so hard for me to let myself get close to people. People like Jana. I never told my parents about the bullying, so I never really got the reassurance I needed. I just started to brush it off as I got older and the kids eventually got bored of harassing me.

'No one wants you here, so just do them a favour and go. You know what to do,' she said. I can't leave now, I'm trapped. Strapped down. I want to leave; I don't want to keep putting everyone through all this hassle. Everyone feels obligated to watch over me because Rhydian and I are technically related. They don't really care about me. I'm just a burden. 'You could be with me now.' I wish I could. I'd give anything to turn back time, to have my parents back.

"Carys?" Jana says. I don't turn my head. I slowly close my eyes and pretend to be asleep again. "Carys?" She whispers. I hear her stand up and I feel her in front of me. She bends down slightly and kisses my head. "I love you." Why is she lying? For all she knows, I'm asleep.

"She must be exhausted," I hear Rhydian.

Jana gasps. "Oh, I didn't realise you were up," she says.

"I barely got a wink," he pauses for just a moment, "She's going to be okay you know, maybe she just needs human medicine."

"It's not fair," Jana's voice breaks, she starts to cry. I try hard not to cry myself.

'See what you do? You upset everyone,' my mother's voice says. 'Figure it out.' Figure what out?

She wants me to do something, maybe if I figure it out and do it, she'll leave me alone and I'll be okay again.

When I wake up the next day, I see the clock on the wall. It's 3 pm. Rhydian is standing with Dr Whitewood on the other side of the room. They don't notice I'm awake.

"Carys has severe chemical imbalances in her brain," Dr Whitewood tells Rhydian.

They must have knocked me out again to run tests on me. "She's suffering from Psychotic Depression and Post Traumatic Stress. Normally I wouldn't be allowed to discuss this with you because you're a minor, but considering your family and the extenuating circumstances, I can make an exception."

"Well technically we're not family, we're a pack, and we share a sister," he says. Dr Whitewood flicks between pages on her clipboard.

"No, according to the blood tests we ran, you and Carys are full biological siblings," she says. Rhydian and I don't share any parents, that's not possible. "We did DNA tests with both of your blood, it's a new thing, Segolia wants all employees, Wolfblood or Human, to be on the hospital record. We thought it would be safe to keep yours and Carys' too." Rhydian takes the clipboard from her and stares at it.

"No, that can't be right, there must have been some kind of mix up," then he looks at me.

"I ran these myself, and I don't make mistakes." Whitewood looks at me too. "Carys, you're up." I just stare at her. I'm so dehydrated that my eyes don't even well up. "We'll get you something to drink and some food." She takes the clipboard from Rhydian and leaves the room. He stands there in shock. I turn my head back to face the window. I just want to get up and run but I can't. I've been restrained because I'm now considered dangerous. How did I let it come to this?

"I don't understand," Rhydian says. He paces the room. "So, you're my sister, does that mean my parents aren't my parents? Or is the other way around?" He comes to my side and looks at me. I keep my focus on the view in front of me.

I lie almost completely still for hours. Rhydian, on the other hand, can't stop moving; he switches between pacing and sitting. At one point a nurse brings in food and water, but I still don't move.

Later that day, the door opens and we both look over to see Jana. She comes to my side.

"Are you alright? I'm sorry that I wasn't here sooner. Maddy's parents made me come home and explain everything," she says, but I just turn again and look away.

"We're brother and sister, Carys and me. Whitewood ran DNA tests," Rhydian says.

"What? But that doesn't make any sense?"

"I know, I'm going to get my parents down here, they're having that DNA test too. I wanted to wait until you got here so Carys wouldn't be alone. I'm getting to the bottom of this, now." He walks out of the room; Jana doesn't stop him. She takes my hand. I look at her.

"Carys, please talk to me. I need to know what's going on in your head." She looks exhausted. Her eyes have dark circles under them, and her hair is a mess. I can't keep putting her through this.

"I keep hearing her voice. My mum," I say, my throat is so dry that my words come out in a croak. "But it's not her, the things she's saying. She would never talk to me like this."

"What's she saying?"

I don't answer her question. "I'm just scared," I say, one small tear gliding down my cheek.

"Scared of what?" I look her in the eyes. "Of hearing your dads voice too?" I nod and the tears begin to stream. She hugs me, although I can't hug her back. "What happened to your arms?" She asks.

"She was- sort of- playing tricks on me, I guess, telling me there were bugs on me, under my skin. I scratched away at my skin until I was sure they were gone. But they were never there. Please, get these straps off," I beg. At that moment a nurse comes in carrying a tray of food. It must be dinner time now. I still haven't touched my lunch.

"Nurse, she's alright, please can we take these off of her?" Jana asks. The nurse puts the food on a table.

"You have to stay calm, Carys," I nod. She unbuckles me and I immediately hug Jana back. Then I realise how selfish I've been. I pull away and sit up in the bed. The nurse pushes the table of food over to me and pulls off the lid. There is a sandwich and jug of water with a glass. Jana pours me a drink and hands it to me.

"The pack have relocated, they're closer now. When we weren't home earlier today, they got worried. I've seen dad. And Rhydian will be back soon with Ceri and Gerwyn. We can figure this all out," she says. Taking my hand. The doors burst open and in walks the very last person I wanted to see. Ava.