He liked you back in high school.
Those few words rang loud and clear, almost like a recording being played too loud, nearly cracking, the sound gravelly against his ears.
"He said he still liked you even now," Kuroo said, letting out a little chuckle. "What a boy! I mean he has a boyfriend already and yet…" Kuroo looked over to Tsukishima, who obviously was no longer in a present state of mind, an obsolete expression plastered on his face. Tsukishima could feel his heart crumble down to the pit of his stomach, barely pounding. He could feel all his senses going numb. Didn't you already decide where your heart lies?
"Tsukki, I know I'm not supposed to be telling you that but well, I just want you to settle things with him. If you do still like him, I believe there is still chance to get back together. But I also want you to remember that even if that happens, I still won't back down. Whenever there's a chance, I'll definitely take it and get you back," Kuroo said. His words had slowly brought Tsukishima to his senses, though only barely.
"I…" Tsukishima gulped down, his fingers started to fumble around the edges of his shirt. "I never said I liked Yamaguchi."
Upon hearing Tsukishima say that, Kuroo could only grit his teeth and ask, "So, what now? You're gonna tell me you regret not confessing to him back in high school? And that you guys could've been together?"
No, it's not that. You're wrong.
Tsukishima cries, his head bowed low and away from Kuroo's line of sight. He dropped the bomb just like that. Every single tear that rolled down against his cheeks were heavy and full of three years worth of mixture of… everything. Just everything. Eating lunch with Yamaguchi, hearing him saying Tsukki, walking home from school with Yamaguchi, just- being with Yamaguchi, but yet still not able to say a single word about his feelings; the feelings that he had decided to keep locked away. Even now, even if Tsukishima could just meet up anytime he wanted, those few words felt like acreages away.
But these aren't tears of regret.
Tsukishima was sure. He wasn't lying to anyone. He wasn't lying to himself.
These are tears of relief.
After years of what Tsukishima thought was unrequited love, those few words took off a whole weight of burden off his shoulders, and that these tears were the cries of the past, whom he thought of as pathetic, way more pathetic than the bullies that picked at Yamaguchi when they were younger, who as equally as pathetic, way more pathetic than his older brother, and definitely way more pathetic than what he was now.
It was at times like this that Kuroo just wanted to throw his arms around Tsukishima; the arms that longed for his warmth, take off his glasses and wipe those tears for him. It was at time like this that he wanted to say, I'm here.
I'm here for you.
Why can't you see?
But he didn't. Instead, Kuroo got closer to him, hesitated to hug him at first but gathered the courage to, and surprisingly Tsukishima leaned into his touch, letting Kuroo embrace him.
"Tsukki…"
"Just for a while." Tsukishima said in between sobs. "Please stay like this.. for a little while." His fingers tugged lightly at Kuroo shirt, a little bit wet from Tsukishima's tears. Kuroo didn't hate it the least bit and had ignored the fact that Tsukishima had started crying into his shirt, and instead took the opportunity to press his lips against the top of his head, his fingers crept up the back of Tsukishima's head and tangled around the other's blonde soft locks, light rubbing and digging into the scalp.
Kuroo rested his cheeks against the top of Tsukishima's head, one hand holding the back Tsukishima's head and the other against Tsukishima's back, and said, "You know if you can't decide where your heart lies, you better do it. I can't keep doing this. I am not as strong a person as you think i might be."
If you keep doing this I won't be able to hold back any longer.
Push me away now, if you have to.
"If you're doing this out of pity, if you're doing this just because you're feeling weak right now, then I'm leaving. My feelings aren't that cheap."
"No, Kuroo you're wrong. I don't regret any of my decision," Tsukishima said, slowly lifting his head as Kuroo moved away slightly to face him. Tsukishima sniffled and rubbed the tears away and dried the wetness on his cheeks with his hand. Kuroo could only remain in that position, his face confused and his eyes demanding explanations.
"The place where my heart belongs is right here," Tsukishima said, lightly pressing his palm against Kuroo's chest. "You've been the one dragging me to hard times, enduring it with me, pulling me out of it, even if only for a while… and now causing me more trouble. I can't be entirely sure, but for now let me believe that this is where I belong, and where I will abide."
Tsukishima is one hell of a beautiful disaster, a miracle from heaven with the heart of glass sprawled on the ceramic tiles, at least in Kuroo's eyes.
Sorry this chapter's kinda short x'D I didn't have much time to write a lot and I didn't want to take too long to write the next chapter x"D Anyways, this story is finally coming to an end! x'D Please look forward to it!