AURTHOR'S NOTE: Yeah, so, in the last chapter I tried to add a line break after Sakura said "So, what do I do first?" but it didn't go through. So now I add my own line breaks using little symbols, like suns and stuff. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

Title: Sakura and her merry band of misfits

Summary: I've never done anything bad ever. I always do my work, listen to my elders, and shown respect to everyone I've ever met. So why am I in a mansion with a bunch of freaks that are at least seven years older than me? sakuraXmultiple

Disclaimer: I do no own Naruto

"Talking"

'Thinking'

Emphasizing

"Dark Zetsu" 'cause he's kickass like that

Chapter 3: Bad little sport

Sasori quirked an eyebrow as he saw Sakura tying her shoe in front of a 24/7 grocer. He parked his car across the street and made his way over. As he got closer he could see the weariness evident on her face. In her blue wedge flip-flops, black hand-me-down skinny jeans, and her red button down he could actually tell she was a girl. Like he could really tell. He stopped in front of her in his own unflattering Akatsuki robe causing her to look up.

"Oh, what's this?" He picked up the abandoned bag beside her feet and peeked inside. She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye as he leaned against the wall beside her. "A bag of candy?" He turned his head to see she was looking in the opposite direction of him. It was more than obvious she was ignoring him and he smirked, looking back in to the bag. "How cute. Just like a little girl."

That caught her attention.

She snatched the bag away and placed them on her other side. "I am not a little girl, I am a young women." Finally glancing up at him, she narrowed her eyes in suspicion. "What are you doing here anyway?" Sasori picked up the end of her long red toboggan hat and twirled it slightly as if inspecting it. "I came to buy a box of condoms."

Sakura stared at him in shocked disgust and he simply looked as if they were talking about the weather. "What flavor do you think I should get?" He smirked at the blush creeping up her pale skin and threw the end of the toboggan over her left shoulder.

"F-flavors?! Y-you're, so…so…nasty!" Sakura fake gagged making Sasori's smirk widen. "Your no fun. But, coming from a girl who avoids work." Her blush died and she wore a confused look on her face. 'Avoids work?' She realized he was referring to her community service and frowned. 'He's one of the reasons I didn't come back in the first place.' She inwardly grumbled to herself saying how it wasn't her fault. He grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckles. "I am here to escort you to the fraternity."

He waited to hear the ear piecing fan girl scream but it never came.

He waited for her to jump into her arms but she never did.

He even waited for her to faint on the spot but she didn't.

Instead, she yanked her hand back and looked up at him puzzled. "What's up with you? If you wanted me to go that bad, I would've just went after school today." She tried (and failed) to discreetly rub her kissed knuckles on the back of her pants legs. "I don't like it when someone else initiates skin to skin contact, so don't do that again." She picked up her things and gave him one last odd look before walking off. His eyes followed her before he went back to his own car.

First she comes to a grocer at dawn for candy and then she brushes him off? As he got in and drove off he thought maybe teenagers aren't all that bad.

Kisame let out a low groan and rolled out of his bed onto the carpeted floor. He glanced up at the clock hanging crookedly from his bedroom wall and scratched his side. "Big hand on the nine…little on the four." He stood and stretched, leaving his cluttered room and headed down stairs where he saw Tobi teaching Sakura how to play one of the masked man's hand-helds. 'That's the girl from before?'

"Oi, chibi-chan." They both looked up and saw Kisame in just his own top-less, rumpled up glory. 'Exhibitionist.' She thought to herself as she turned red without her knowledge. "I am not a chibi," Sakura turned back to the game Tobi had her playing as Kisame pulled a book out of the book case in the corner of the room. "Babe." Kismae grinned at the nick name and Tobi wagged his finger at her. "That's not a nice thing to say about Kisame-senpai, Sakura-chan."

She shrugged carelessly and Kisame's smug look went away at Tobi's scolding. (a/n: Babe is Paul Bunyan's pet giant blue ox from the children's book: Paul Bunyan.) He waved it off, people had called him worst, and he dropped the anatomy book on her lap. "Ready to work for me chibi-chan?" When he dropped the heavy book on her lap it messed up her concentration and she died. "Aw. Sakura-chan was just about to beat the record." She threw down the game effectively making the batteries fly out.

"Damn it, damn it, damn it all!" Tobi shrunk back and Kisame quirked an eye brow. "You killed me you big blue bastard! You killed me. I hope you're proud of yourself!" Tobi quickly excused himself and Sakura stood with the text book in her hands. "Now what the hell did you want?!" Sakura is a bit of a poor sport whenever something involves a competition.

Kisame, use to Hidan when he haves his bitch fits, thought nothing of Sakura's anger and grinned. He got in a push-up position making her look at him like he was mental. "I want you to get on my back and help me study while I do push-ups." She took a hesitant step forward before stepping back again. "But…why?" "Because I'm failing my science classes and I haven't worked out today. I wanted to add weight but you're too small by yourself so I need you to hold the text book."

Sakura finally agreed and laid back on Kisame's back. "Before I start reading…why ask me?" Kisame started doing push-ups surprised she still felt light with the textbook's added weights. "Because those other fat jackasses would break my back." She couldn't help but crack a smile and opened up the text book. "Where do I start?" She intertwined their legs to balance herself and keep from slipping off. "Anywhere is fine, just start asking me questions.".

"Um…When does the fetus get fingerprints?"

"At month three."

"Will a person die from sleep or starvation first and how long would it take?"

"Sleep. Lack of sleep related deaths take ten days while starvation takes weeks."

Sakura was pleasantly surprised at how well Kisame knew this subject. It felt weird feeling his muscles ripple against her back but it was refreshing to know she wasn't dealing with a muscle headed idiot. "Okay…next," She paused making him do the same. "What? Don't recognize the word?" She shook her head no and swallowed down hard. "H-how long is…t-the largest e-er-erect p-p-p…male neither region…?"

Kisame stopped before balancing himself so that he was doing one armed push-ups. "Ah, you are at that curious age-" "No! No, no, no!" She untangled her legs from his secretly blushing. "It's all in your stupid book!" He almost laughed at her but instead provided her with an answer. "Thirteen inches. I do remember getting measured just like it was yesterday." This time he did laugh as Sakura quickly scampered off of his back.

"All you guys are so gross! I'm going home!" He tried to stop laughing as she stomped out but could only clutch his sides. 'I'm so glad I got Tobi to sign my book.' She got a little ways down the street and saw a bike lying on the ground with a "take me" sign and decided to take it. "At least one good thing happened today."

Sasori/Kisame power chapter! Don't worry I didn't forget about Pein, he's next. I still do feel like a pervert talking about condoms and dicks but it's all in good fun. I usually post these chapters at elven something on a Saturday night but it doesn't show up on the site until Sunday but whateves, as long as it gets here. Bye-bye!