Amy the Girl did a cool pose as she got an S Rank. Record time. She removed his dick, put it along with Knuckle the Gangster's awesome big red four-header, and got back to work.
However, in doing this, she accidentally nudged Eggman's pingas so that it clipped through the bag and onto the glitchy crate she put her bag on top of, which proceeded to carry the crate along with Eggman's dick off into space… Fuck, hopefully that won't come into play later.
Amy the Girl now needed a replacement penis. She decided to take the Duke's personal teleporter to the Chaotic Council's floating fortress of over-compensation, where she knew Eggman Nega would be waiting.
Ever since Eggman's ultra death, his son, Eggman Nega, took his place. Eggman Nega was only 2 months old…. But the Council didn't really care, cause honestly, he wined alot less than the old Eggman.
Amy the Girl looked around the corner, only to find that Ella the Mexican was trying to breastfeed her bastard child (Eggman got Ella the Mexican drunk off red wine and impregnated her, and due to Ella the Mexican's religious beliefs, she had to give birth to the brat). Amy the Girl jumped from the corner with her gun at the ready. This bitch was going down.
"DROP THE BABY! AND I WON'T SHOOT YOU!... JUST THE BABY!"
"Death, ha. I'll accept with open tits." Ella the Mexican took out her revolver, shotgun, minigun, RPG-7, and Super-Ultra-Death-Egg-Fuck-Me-Laser Cannon all at once and began fire to unload the fuck onto Amy the Girl. Amy the Girl ducked back behind her corner, watching the anarchey unfold onto the wall beside her. There was no way she could compete with this kind of power!
However, while Ella the Mexican was unloading death upon the wall, she realized that if Amy the Girl murdered her baby… She wouldn't be the one to kill it, thus would not go to Jahannam. A religious loophole!
"I changed my mind, you can kill him."
"Wait, really?"
"Yeh, Eggman essentially raped me to have it anyways, I don't give a single shit about this bastard, do whatever you please, I'm fuking leacing." And with that, the only obstacle between Amy the Girl and Eggman Nega walked away.
Amy the Girl laughed, not only at her victory, but because Ella the Mexican getting raped was objectively funny.
Amy the Girl looked at baby Nega's tiny little hands as he reached up to her. His baby eyes twinkled in the light. How could she bring herself to kill such innocence and then take his cock? No. She had to do the right thing. She had to take his cock THEN kill him, so he would be allowed into God's kingdom. She put on a yamucah and got out some wine. Amy the Girl then took some scissors and cut off Baby Nega's dick, and threw it in the bag. She put the wine in her mouth and began blowing Baby Nega as rabbis do. The alcohol on the child's stump of a dick caused him to yell and scream (baby's screams mean they're calling out to God) until he passed out from witnessing the holy spirit. She took her mouth off his thoroughly saved crotch and said "Shallom" (it means "I love baby dicks" in Jewish.)
She then carelessly threw Baby Nega into the council's super awesome ultra chrome baking oven; an appropriate death for a Jew.
"Sleep easy, mother fucker" she said, and then turned the oven onto 9001 degrees. She then used the President's teleporter to warp into the White House before the place exploded from the over-loaded oven.
Amy the Girl was now in the White House bathroom, which was located right next to the President. While she could kill him now, she didn't want to set off the guards quite yet, she needed to get to the Nukes first.
Amy the Girl sneaked past the Monica Lewinsky room and into the Missle Chamber, and tried to send a Nuke to Planet Wisp to blow Mother Wisp into several jelly stained pieces. However, she needed the Nukes Codes first in order to launch it, so she pressed the PARTY button, which signeled every single gaurd in the White House to MOTHER FUCKING PARTY IN THE NUKE ROOM! YEAH BOOOOY!
Before she knew it, disco balls came out of the ceiling, lights flashed everywhere, punch and snacks came from the floor on a nice table, and people were having unprotected sex in the bathrooms. It was a typical White House party. Amy the Girl pickpocketed the codes from some scientist who was busting a nut into Linzy Thorndike's MILF vagina.
Amy the Girl began to type in the codes as several horny men bashed their asses into the sides of her hips. But one particular, faithful bump caused her to accidentally hit the LAUNCH ALL NUKES button, causing every single last nuke in Central City to be launched at Planet Wisp… Woops.
Amy the Girl ran out at SONIC SPEED, and watched from the earth surface as Planet Wisp exploded into apocalyptic glory, causing Wisp guts to shower the earth orbit… It's gonna be raining wisp guts for roughly 2 hours.
As if by fate, Mother Wisp's MASSIVE whale sized cock fell right next to Amy the Girl. I guess Mother Wisp was man after all…. Not that there's anything wrong with that. She poot the dick into her bag with the others.
The President walked out of the White House clutching his photo of Sonic and Shadow, in absolute awe.
"WHO THE FUCK LAUNCHED ALL OUER NUKES AT PLANET WISP!?" he yelled.
"... Um…. he did" A random guardsmen then pointed at Hawkye
"HAWKYE! YOU'RE FIRED!" The President yelled.
"Eh, okay, I never wanted this job anyway." Hawkye then walked off into the sunset, leaving this plane of reality. Just like an Angel's kiss, he leaves us… God, he has such a nice reptilian ass.
Amy the Girl pointed her gun at the President, ready to take his life, when suddenly, a talking toopay with a man with a Mad Libs book under it ran into the center of the awed crowd, and said...
"People of _Central City_! Are you tired of _The President_ letting _random people launch all of our nukes_? Well, I, _Donald Trump_, will ensure that _The President_ will no longer _penis_ us by letting _random people launch all of our nukes_! And to insure that _immigrants_ will never rape our children ever again. Let's make _Mobius_ great again!"
Donald the Trump was immediately elected new President. His first order of buisness was for the city to build him a gold encrusted space-gunship, to allow him to spread Central City's love all over illegal space aliens by shooting the buttfuck out of them. What a hero!
Bob the Ex-President raised his photo of Sonic and Shadow, a single tear fell onto it's frame. "I failed you" he said to the photo. He then stole Amy the Girl's gasoline, drenched himself and the photo in it, and lit himself on fire while kissing the photo.
Once he burned to death, Amy the Girl ripped off Bob the Ex-President's charded dick, and added it to her bag.
However, things were not all well. While she had only one target left, CWC, every single continent of Mobius launched nukes at Central City, knowing that they no longer had any way to defend themselves. No more would they police them for no reason! They could now use any economic system they wanted!
Amy the Girl stole some hipster's snowboard, spite it being summer, and snowboarded north through City Escape Zone and towards CWCville to have her final fight. Thankfully San Fransisco is ULTRA GAY and as a result, the streets were completely covered in semen for her to snowboard down, since snowboarding down a plain concrete road would be silly. As the nukes fell from the heavens, Amy the Girl sung a prayer to help protect herself from the incoming inevitable death.
(You gotta sing it like City Escape. The modern version from geneations! :) )
(P.S don't suck at it! :( )
"Hey!
Hey God!
Oh lord!
Save my ass!
Bombs raining down on this San-Fran town.
Through gay pride parades with guys swallowing rainbows.
Can't dick around, sort of unlike these guys
I must have the head of Chris Chandler by sunrise
Nukes keep on killing gay men
It's Sodom and Gomorrah all over again!
Help me kill CWC,
Take his dick, then I'll be free
God save me
It's Amy
Help me to go and castrate CWC
I'll take his goods
God save me (God save me)
Hit top speed
While faggot organs are raining upon me
I'll make it through through all these nukes
God save me
Amen!
God save me!
Amen!
Danger is lurking around every turn
I don't wish to be boiled alive in sperm!
I know with this prayer I will make it through
Because I'm your favorite, I will ask this of you:
Just keep me moving ahead
Around these corruptors of the marriage bed
Keep me from any ugly fatalities
Be them bombs or STDS
Woo!
God save me
It's Amy
I need to go and castrate CWC
Or I'll be through
God save me (God save me)
Hit top speed
Get me by with some help from the Almighty
Don't be a douche, man I need you!
God save me!
Yeah!
Save me!
Amen!
Oooh lord!
Save my ass!
Woo!
Butt pirates are dying right in front of me
Snowboard down the semen streets and I will soon be free
God save me
It's Amy
Help me to go and castrate CWC
I'll take his goods
God save me (God save me)
Hit top speed
While faggot organs are raining upon me
I'll make it through through all these nukes
God save me!
God save me!
Save my ass!
God save me!
Amen!
Or you're a douche
Oh yeah!"
As if by miracle, she had finally reached CWCville, land of the virgins… Sorta.
The place smelled of McDonalds, dirty crapped breifs, Axe body spray, and recyclable sperm, though in retrospect, just saying McDonalds would have covered all of that but fuck you, I'm the author, okay? The city was mostly populated by shitty Sonic fan characters, and giant cotton swabs with sticks for arms.
She walked into CWCville mall, which was subtitled "THE BEST MALL EVeR!"
While there, she came across a strange spawn of unoriginal satan. A demonic creature that had the features of a Raichu…. And herself… She could only imagine what her name was.
"Let me guess, your name is Roseichu the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, right?"
"OMG! How Did You know My Name!?"
"... Luck, I guess."
"OH MY GOD! I LOVE YOUR BLOOD STAINED SUIT!" Amy the Girl remembered she wasn't wearing her normal dress during all this, but instead her work outfir, which wasa grey suit and tie.
"Um, thanks."
"OMG! You have to Tell me Where I can Buy one!"
"Up your ass, WHERE is Christian Westen Chandler?"
"But There is NO Store in my Perfect Ass :("
"What? No, Where's Chris?"
"Thorndyke?"
"No, CWC!"
"Jeez, you don't Have to tell me twice, but during the stone age!"
"... What? That doesn't even make sense."
"FUCK YOU! I AM WOMAN! HEAR ME ROAR!" Rosechu the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon than stripped naked and leaped at Amy the Girl, forcing her vagina into Amy the Girl's mouth and nose, making breathing a bitch.
Amy the Girl managed to take out her gun, and plug the nozzle into Rosechu the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon's perfect ass, and began to unload.
"OW! Only my Sweetbolt and his Father can do that! And Only with Electric Hedgehog Lighting Powers!" It was not working, so Amy the Girl took out her secret weapon, her hidden Pika-Pika hammer. She swung it into Rosechu the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon's goddamned motherfucking deformed hybrid abomination skull, slapper her off her vagina right off her face.
Amy the Girl took a deep breath, her vagina reeked of STD's and yeast. Amy the Girl looked over at Rosechu the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, her vagina reeked of STD's and yeast.. Her neck had totally dislocated from the impact, her corpse twitched a bit. Suddenly, out of nowhere, Chris the Autistic ripped out of the background (where he came from was purely orange, so fuck knows where he was before this, probably chugging Cumkist™ orange soda or something) and said...
"Pardon Me, but THey're to Girl-Talk For a Couple of hours, And I'd like to save Time... And Money on my Car insurance by Switching to Get-HOLY GODJESUS! ROSIE!"
As soon as Christ realized his prech=ous Rosechu the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, Amy the Girl smacked his head like a game of Wake-A-Mole or Kick-The-Autistic. However, due to Chris's newly made Iron Skull abilety, the blow was not fatal.
Chris the Autistic, now angry, he summoned a whistle he now had to summon SONICHU! The Electric Hedgehog Pokémon! Defender of _penis_.
"Don't worry, Father! I'll take care of this cree- oh my god." He looked straight into Amy the Girl's ROCKING tits. He could no longer control his DAMN near 7-inch lightning rod, and he pounced at Amy the Girl, ripping apart her jeans.
"I. NEED. CHINA!" He yelled, prepping for his sexual hedgehog assult.
"FUCK YOU!" Amy the Girl yelled, busting a cap into Sonichu the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon's face. However, due to powers of Mary Sue powers, it merely stunned him. However, Amy the Girl knew every Mary Sue's weakness. She grabbed his Hedgehog balls and crushed them like grapes. This nullified his Mary Sue powers. Amy the Girl then popped another cap into his head, this time, it went through.
"Fa….. Theeeeer..." he said, falling backwards and into a christ position, his boner slowly deflating to indicate his fleeting life.
"Whatever! I can always make another two Electric Hedgehog Pokemon! But for now, ELECTRIC HEDGEHOG POWER! PEW!"
And with that, Chris-Chan slowly, and sexually confusingly, TRANSFORMED into Chris-Chan Sonichu!
Amy the Girl was scared, first she was choked by her doppleganger's vagina, then she was nearly raped by an imposter of her loved one, now this shit. She could no longer take it anymore. She needed help. Amy the Girl, still staring at Chris-Chan the Autistic's naked flabby body covered in blue paint, quickly dialed Blaze the Cat.
"Big the Cat, come to CWCville mall, now"
"Actually, my name is Blaze Lin Jenner the Cat now"
"Don't call anybody!" Said Chris-Chan as he peppersprayed Amy the Girl in the face.
"AAAGH! THAT HURTS! BLAZE GET OVER HERE AND HELP ME NOW!"
"Okay, fine, jeez." Blaze the Cat warped to the mall using to her MLG hacker skillz. Chris Chan the Autistic popped a boner, and got on his knees.
"Blaze, will you Be My Heart Sweet?" He asked, proposing to her using a Rosechu medallion. Blaze the Cat always had a thing for fat guys, but now that he was a she now, it could no longer be considered weird to want to fuck fat guys. Now only half of it was weird!
"How about we skip the third date, and go to the fucking?" Blaze the Cat told him seductivly.
"mmmm, I like how Yall think" Chris responded, they began to kiss more passionetly than a passionate strawberry, and sweeter than the sweetest chocolate.
Amy the Girl blew fucking chunks looking at this. However, this love was not to last. For when Blaze the cat took off his pants to suck that fat autistic cock…
"... What the fuck?" She stared right into it. It was so… Small, and angular and grotesquely dented…. It also smelled Axe Body spraw and orange soda…. 20 year old orange soda, and downright loneliness. She began to rethink this shit.
"WAIT! I-I-I can still be good, lemmie just" He ripped off Blaze the Cat's pants, only to reveal that she not only had a vagina, but a PICKLE too! She was a Futanari! "... Oh, EW! Gross, you Slanderous Troll! You Tried to Sex me UP! Gross! Gtfo! I am STRAIGHT… Or lesbian. But NOT a DAMN DIRTY FAGGOT!"
"Dude. That's just offensive," said Amy the Girl.
"Wait? Your dumbing ME!? I'm being dumped by Christian Weston Chandler!? FUCK NO!" Blaze the Cat then used her 420 blaze it powers to ignite his sorry ass, due to him alway being covered in Axe, and the body paint he had was highly flamable, he was nothing but a fat, really depressing skeleton in seconds.
Amy the Girl reached for his skeleton dick, only for Christ to have a post-death reflex, forcing her to blowjob his dry dick. After 5 seconds and a good, salty dosage of his comeuppance, he finally passed on. Amy the Girl would never be the same after this moment.
Blaze the Cat drove home a mentally scared Amy the Girl to Cream the Rabbit's hideout- the Stronghold of the Resistence. Once inside, Amy the Girl handed over the bag of dicks. Cream the Rabbit looked them over. It was perfect.
"Gotta hand it to you, Amy the Girl, I didn't think you had it in yo-"
"Can it, bitch, I'm not doing this for forgiveness now." Amy the Girl sat down, and lit a joint. "I'm not doing this for Justice, or Honor, or even love…" She took a deep breath of the joint, and blew it all out.
"Only for REVENGE!"
Cream the Rabbit smiled, this was the start of something beautiful.
"My only question" Cream the Rabbit said "Is how far will you go to find the truth?"
"All the fucking way."
The End