That night, I lay in bed and couldn't sleep. Jasper was missing. It wasn't like him to disappear and not tell anyone. I left the house that night as usual, to go sit by the creek. It was the only way I'd be able to think at this pace my brain was going.
I sat down, feeling defeated. I looked down at the grass around me, and started pulling at it. I had to do something here. Normally I was kissing or talking. Just sitting felt weird.
I laid back and stared up at the stars. The sky was so beautiful tonight; clear and bright.
"You beat me here. That never happens." I heard a chuckle behind me.
I sat up and turned around to see Jasper walking toward me.
"Oh, Jas!" I chimed, getting up and running to him. "You disappeared today! I was worried you had left without telling me. I was worried I'd never see you again." I buried my face in his chest and held him tightly.
He kissed me softly. "I'm sorry. I had some paperwork to take into the next town. It was only supposed to take a few hours, but there were some issues. I just returned about twenty minutes ago."
"Now that you're here, let's sit." I pulled him over to our normal spot and laid back. "Look at the stars, Jas. They're so amazing tonight."
"Elizabeth…" he whispered. He sounded tense.
"Yes? What's wrong?" I turned on my side and looked at him. His face was painted with agony.
"I have to leave tomorrow." He whispered, pain lingering in his eyes.
My heart pounded in my chest, the heavy hollow noise rang in my ears and made me sick to my stomach.
"No. You can't. I mean… you have a week left! You can't leave me. No, you can't leave me yet!" I shouted, tears spilling down my face.
He pulled me into his arms, my body heaving with my sobs. The thick fabric of his uniform was rough against my skin as I kept crying.
"I'm so sorry, Lizzie. If there was any way for me to stay, I would. But time is of the essence. I need to be there; to help my countrymen." He said, rubbing my back.
"What am I going to do without you? What if… you don't come back?" I choked out.
He kissed my cheek. "I will. I will never stop loving you, and our love will bring us together again. I promise."
I clung onto him tightly. "Will you do something before you go? Something I can keep in my heart and my thoughts?"
He looked down at me, confused. "What can I do?"
"Make love to me."
His eyes widened and he stared at me. "Lizzie, you're not serious?"
I nodded, my crying slowing to silent tears. "I am. I want to remember this moment forever. If anything happens, I'll always have this memory of you in my heart."
He smiled, and leaned down to kiss me. "I love you so much." He said.
We laid down in the grass, and I made quick work of the buttons on his uniform. His jacket off, he kissed me deeply and began undoing my gown. Thankfully I wasn't wearing a corset or cage under my dress, so it took very little effort. Next, I unbuttoned his shirt, revealing a hard, muscular chest. I ran my fingers gracefully over his smooth skin. His eyes closed, savoring my touch.
I pulled off his shirt, finally getting a view of his arms. He always touched and held me so gently; you would never guess by the sight of his muscles. I ran my fingers across the skin on his arms. His muscles tensed as I brushed against them.
He reached down and began to undo his pants. I followed his directions, undoing my undergarments. After a few moments, we were completely naked, just staring at each other's body. I had never shown my legs to a man, let alone my entire body. And Jasper seemed fairly unsure of himself as well, as he set his slightly shaking hand on my waist and pulled me close for a kiss.
He kissed me hard, and I reached up to touch his jaw and neck. His hands slowly moved up my side and rested on my shoulders. We fumbled awkwardly, not knowing how to move this forward. Finally, Jasper got up on his hands and knees and slowly climbed around and positioned himself between my legs.
He kissed my lips, my chin, my neck... the sensation was overwhelming and it made my body hum for more. He brought a hand up and gently touched one of my breasts. His touch felt like electricity shooting through me.
"Are.. you sure?" he whispered quietly. "I can- we can stop-"
I kissed him to keep him from finishing his sentence. "Don't stop." I whispered against his lips.
He adjusted himself to a new angle and I felt him try to enter me. But of course, as I was a virgin, it was easier said than done. He pushed himself in a little farther and I felt something very painful happen. I made a short, soft gasp and my eyes watered.
Jasper immediately stopped and looked at me, fear clearly on his face. "Did I hurt you? Do you want me to stop? Are you-?"
I shook my head. "No... keep going." Sex couldn't hurt more than that... why would people continue to have sex if it wasn't pleasurable in some way?
Finally, after a couple of really sore moments, Jasper was completely inside me. He stopped, breathing hard, like he couldn't make up his mind as to what he should do next.
I reached up and pulled his face down, kissing him softly on the lips. My passion and lust were obvious, so with no more hesitation, Jasper started to move himself in and out of me. As the pain began to wear off, something way better took its place. My heart filled with love as other parts of me felt more whole than ever before. I felt like in that moment, our souls were together as one. Nothing I would ever feel again would feel as perfect and complete as this moment.
We kept moving, grinding and holding each other close, our hot breath making gasps as we became one. Finally, Jasper's muscles tightened, and he moaned, his whole body shuddering. I felt something warm fill me. He slumped a little, his weight overtaking mine.
He slowly pulled out of me, breathing heavily. "I should have... pulled myself out... I should have..."
I touched his cheek, caressing it. "Shh, Jas. It's okay. Everything's okay."
He kissed me again, but this time it was a kiss that felt more like a claim than one of passion. "I love you more than anything in this world. And I will come back to you."
We were worried someone may have heard us or even seen us, so we dressed as quickly as we could. Once we were clothed, we just laid in the grass together, holding each other closer than ever before. I fought sleep for hours, just to watch his sweet face as he drifted to sleep in my arms. I cried silently, thinking about what I would do if he didn't return to me.
Before we knew it, the sky had a pink haze to it. It was getting close to dawn, and I needed to go home. I looked like a mess from lying in the long grass for so long. I stroked his face, wiping away a piece of hair from his eyes.
His eyes fluttered open, and he smiled. "Elizabeth," he whispered.
"Jasper, sweetheart. I hate to break this dream we're in... but it's almost dawn. I need to return home before my sister realizes I'm gone."
He stretched and sat up. "Yes, let's get you home." He stood and held his hand out to me. He helped me off the ground and I laced my fingers with his. We walked quickly and quietly back to my house. I gave him a very long kiss as he brought me to my door.
"I love you, Jasper." I whispered.
"I love you, Lizzie. I'll see you in a few hours." he rested his forehead against mine. I kissed him one more time before slipping back into the house and into bed.
Even with sleep weighing heavily down upon me, I cried and cried until I finally fell asleep.
Jasper's departure was torture to me. I cried as he packed his horse. I cried as he waved goodbye to people as they passed by. I cried the hardest when he tried to say goodbye to me as we stood outside the Inn.
"We will be reunited," he whispered in my ear as he held me tightly. "And our love will be stronger than ever. I love you."
"I love you, too." I cried, taking his face in my hands. I brushed a small bit of hair from his face and kissed him. "Come back to me."
As he disappeared from sight, I felt myself breaking down. I hurried to my room and collapsed on the bed. My sister, having heard the news of Jasper's departure, came in a moment later and rubbed my back as she spoke to me.
"He will come back, Liz. He's strong, and he loves you." She said. "You take as long as you need. If you need any of us, call for us. We'll be here for you."
A few weeks passed, and the only thing holding me to happiness were the letters Jasper sent me. I got stacks of them every week in the mail. Jasper told me all about where he was fighting, and the men he'd met along the way.
But one week, the letters stopped.
My sister assured me it was just the post- but after another two weeks, I was horrified. Had he died? Had he met someone else during his journeys?
A month after the letters stopped, I got a small package in the mail. It was my worst nightmare come true.
Miss Elizabeth Clive,
Mr. Jasper Whitlock disappeared somewhere outside Galveston after evacuating a colony of women and children. His jacket and horse were discovered along with a lot of blood. His body was not recovered. In his jacket were several personal items, including a letter addressed to you- and it was the only contact information we had. As such, we have sent you his personal effects.
No, God, please no...
I shuffled through the box. In it was a small handkerchief embroidered with the initials JW, and a golden pocket watch with the inscription "To my son Jasper on the occasion of his eighteenth birthday". There was also a letter addressed to me.
I ripped open the letter as fast as my trembling hands would let me.
Dearest Lizzie,
I am heading back to Galveston now. We just evacuated a colony of women and children. As I saw the concerned faces of the people I was helping, all I could think of was you. You were so worried we would be separated forever. Well, not for long, my love. My next assignment has me coming through town for a day or two. Finally, after six months apart, we will be reunited. And there is a possibility this could be my last assignment for some time.
I cannot wait to see you. I have something special for you. I'm carrying it next to my heart for safe keeping.
All my love,
Jas
His jacket was in the package as well. I pulled it out and started to cry hysterically. There were bloodstains all over it, especially around the neck. All I could imagine was someone slitting Jasper's throat or being attacked by a wild animal, or something just as equally awful.
I squeezed the jacket against my chest, and felt something hard poke at my collar bone. I pulled the jacket back, and there was something in the jacket's inside chest pocket. I slid my hand into the compartment and pulled out a small box.
With shaking hands I lifted the lid off the box. Tears streamed silently down my face as I looked down at a ring. a thin golden band with seven small diamonds, arranged to look like a bursting star. I struggled to remove the ring from the box. This ring... was for me. This was the present Jasper had put near his heart for safe keeping. This ring... to make me his wife.
I slid the ring onto my finger and crawled into bed, clutching his jacket.
Heartache came easily. My heart broke for Jasper just as quickly as it had fallen for him.
My sister was so worried about me. I hardly ate, hardly left home. Nothing made me happy. I refused to remove the ring from my finger, refused to give up his jacket, even though it needed a good washing. Annabelle was scared to leave me alone, so she stayed home with me almost all the time. Occasionally I would come with her to church, but I didn't listen. To me, a God who separated my love from me was not a God I wanted to know. When people asked me about Jasper, I would simply tell them, "One day we will be reunited." By this time even my suitor Charlie was engaged to another young woman and no one called on me anymore.
After an entire year, I was finally living with the pain. On the year anniversary of receiving that horrible package, I decided to go down to the pond around midnight. I sat at the edge, dipping my feet in. A flood of memories and emotion overtook me. I cried quietly into my hands.
"Excuse me, Miss Clive?"
Fear rippled through me as I sat up. "Who is out there?"
A tall, dark-haired man appeared in the darkness. "I'm sorry to frighten you. But I was told I might find you here. My name is George, and I fought alongside Jasper Whitlock."
My heart skipped a beat. "Yes? What about him?"
"He's not dead. I know where he is." The man smiled.
My heart pounded. "Major Jasper Whitlock, Texas Cavalry?"
"He's the one." The man grinned.
I stood up and clapped my hands together. "You can't be serious? Well, would you mind taking me to where he is?"
"Sure, I would be more than happy to take you right now. I have a horse waiting already because I was on my way out of town again. I just wanted to drop by and let you know I had seen him." he motioned to a horse that was tied to a post not too far from us.
This man was very handsome. He was probably more handsome than Jasper, but I was not deceived. My eyes were only for one man. And I HAD to find him.
"Would you mind if I packed a small bag for the journey?" I started toward town.
"I'm a bit in a hurry, I'm afraid. I can't afford to wait any longer."
"It will only take a moment, I promise."
"We need to leave now!" He growled. This time the man sounded frightening.
I looked back at him. His eyes, which I hadn't noticed before, were crimson. They were so bright they shone in the darkness.
"Never mind, then." I said shakily. "Thank you anyway. I'm going to head home now." I got up and tried to walk around him.
"Oh, you aren't going anywhere." A sick smile spread across the man's face.
No... this is exactly what my sister warned me about... I should have listened...
"Please, leave me alone!" I shouted, and I started running away from him.
But I hadn't even gotten ten feet from where I had been standing when I was knocked over and pushed face-first into the grass.
"Please, no!" I screamed, tears streaming down my cheeks. He was probably going to kill me... after he had done whatever it was he wanted with me.
With superhuman strength, he flipped me over onto my back and then lifted me off the ground by my throat. I struggled to breathe, my legs kicking out of instinct below me.
He stared up at me, the bluish tint from the moon highlighting his handsome features. If I had seen him around town, I wouldn't think anything of him. But that was probably his best disguise- just a normal guy.
I began praying for the first time in a year. I prayed that God would get me out of this alive, but if he couldn't, that it would be painless. But it was all in vain.
George set me back down on my feet, holding my shoulders so tightly I thought he might break my bones. His teeth glimmered like some sort of predatory animal as he smiled viciously.
"Unbutton your collar." he snarled. He let go just enough for me to move my arms, but I couldn't escape. He had some kind of superhuman strength. I unbuttoned the top couple of buttons of my dress. He held one of my shoulders near my neck as he pulled back my collar, exposing all of my neck.
"Good girl. See you on the other side." his smile widened as he lunged toward my neck.
My last scream was muffled quickly as his teeth ripped into my throat.