This is the last chapter - thank you so much for all the reviews and the support and I hope you like the ending. I still don't have internet at home, but I'm hoping to fit in a couple of updates today.
Tanith Panic, thank you for your review. I think Megan was lucky because she happened to live next to two doctors who happened to be at home in the middle of the day and happened to be on the balcony when she cried out. I love a good Casualty coincidence!
tracys dream, thank you for your review - I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter.
CBloom2, I love cute men and I love clueless men so Ethan would be perfect if it wasn't for the whole fictional thing! Thank you for your review.
LittleBritishPerson, I imagine Cal arrived about half an hour after Ethan, but it's not clear at all. I'm not very good with time! I'm glad you liked Cal helping Ethan though his panic attack. Thank you for your review.
X-Sammii-X, I think someone does have a crush on Ethan... and can you blame her? I expect Cal realised Ethan was going to need support and for once, he didn't mess it up! Thank you for your review.
Becs2202, it is very difficult to know if someone likes you, especially if you're modest like Ethan. I don't think it's even occurred to Ethan that Megan might like him! Thank you for your review.
ETWentHome, thank you for your review. I think Ethan would probably be single forever if he didn't have Cal! I doubt he'd have got together with Honey without Cal's help either.
is-there-somewhere-x, thank you for your review. I'm really happy you enjoyed the chapter. I agree dinner with the brothers sounds fun! If it wasn't for Megan's injuries, I'd swap places with her in a second!
Thank you to Catt9089 and is-there-somewhere-x for the follows and favourite.
Ethan helped Cal to sit on the sofa and started to lift his legs onto the sofa, but Cal shook his head.
"Just get me a chair or something to put my foot on. I want you to sit next to me."
Ethan was surprised. He didn't think Cal had said that to him for over twenty years, but he knew his brother was in pain and it would be understandable if he wanted a bit of comfort.
He got Cal a chair and sat beside him.
"Okay?" said Ethan.
Cal nodded, his eyes on Ethan. "I'm okay."
"You don't need another painkiller?"
"I've already taken the maximum," said Cal. "But I'm fine."
Ethan sat quietly, unsure what to say, so he occupied himself in thinking of how he could help Cal if the pain did become too much to bear. There was ice, of course. Warming and cooling gels and sprays. Ethan was fairly sure they had some of each in the bathroom. He could also try tightening Cal's bandage to give more support, though he'd have to make sure he wasn't cutting the circulation off, of course. Or if the pain was really bad…
He gasped in surprise when Cal suddenly took Ethan's glasses off and put his arms around him, hugging him close. "It's okay, Nibbles. It's okay. It's over now."
Ethan opened his mouth to tell Cal he was okay, but then his eyes filled with tears. His sobs were loud and childlike and probably should have been embarrassing, but for some reason they weren't when Cal was holding him so tightly and telling him it was okay.
He wondered how Cal had known because he hadn't. "Is your watch an hour fast again?" he asked, sniffling, when Cal finally let him go.
Cal gave Ethan a tissue. "What are you going on about now, Nibbles?"
Ethan wiped his nose. "You know when you see a girl in a club and you tell her she hasn't got any, you know, underwear on and when she says she has, you say your watch might be an hour fast? I was wondering if it was fast with me too."
Cal stared at him. "Firstly, Ethan, I haven't used that line for at least twenty years… well, fifteen; and secondly, I wouldn't use it on my brother; and thirdly, are you trying to tell me something?"
Ethan laughed shakily. "I just meant how did you know I was going to cry? Because I had no idea."
"Oh, that's easy, Nibbles," said Cal, one arm still around Ethan. "You used to be such a cry-baby, I got to know the signs pretty well. You were blinking; your nose was twitching; your lip was starting to wobble…"
"Of course I was blinking!" said Ethan. "How else am I supposed to lubricate my eyes?" He glared at Cal. "And my nose wasn't twitching."
"Okay, maybe you didn't have quite all the signs this time… but seriously, Ethan, after what you've been through, you had every reason to cry."
Ethan looked away, fiddling with his tissue. "Because I'm a stupid, cowardly cry-baby?"
"No," said Cal forcefully. "Look at me, Nibbles. No, put your glasses on and look at me properly."
Ethan did as he was told.
"You had a reason to cry because you're my very brave little brother who conquered his fear enough to get halfway across a ledge," said Cal. "I know you couldn't get all the way across, but that doesn't matter. To get that far when you're terrified is amazing. And in case you don't remember me mentioning it before, you're amazing. And I'm proud of you."
"I don't see why," muttered Ethan, lowering his gaze.
"Because I get scared all the time and most of the time, I don't even try to face my fear," said Cal. "I was amazed and impressed that you even considered going across to help Megan."
Ethan heard the words but felt no satisfaction in them. He'd have said the same thing about someone else who'd faced their fear, but he couldn't feel anything but disappointment and disgust with himself. "I know, Cal, but it wasn't good enough."
Cal hugged him. "It was more than good enough for me."
"But not for me," said Ethan. He thought about moving out of Cal's embrace, but he still felt wobbly. He was safe with Cal, but the feeling of being on that ledge hadn't completely gone. His eyes filled again. "I don't want to feel like this forever."
"You won't," said Cal. "Give it a few days and it will still be a horrible memory, but not one that's with you every minute."
Ethan shook his head. "No, I didn't mean that. I don't just want to get over what happened today. I want to get over the whole fear. I don't want to be afraid of heights anymore."
"Then I'm sure you can get over it," said Cal simply.
Ethan looked at him uncertainly. "Do you really think I could?"
"Of course you could," said Cal. "Or at least you can learn to deal with your fear. I'm not saying it's going to be easy because it's not. It's probably going to take you quite a lot of time. There are lots of different ways of dealing with a phobia and you might have to give lots of different techniques a try before you find the one that works for you."
"But you think I could do it?" said Ethan.
Cal nodded and smiled. "I don't know anyone as brave as you, Ethan. Not just for going on the ledge. The way you looked after Mum and dealt with everything. You shouldn't have had to do that on your own, but you did."
"Please don't think I'm getting at you, but I didn't have any choice about that," said Ethan as gently as he could. "When something has to be done and you're the only person who can do it, all kinds of things that seemed impossible become possible."
"Even so, I bet you had to be brave all the time," said Cal. "You're not saying you weren't scared, are you? Of losing Mum? Of seeing her go through pain and suffering?"
"Of course I was scared," said Ethan. "But it wasn't the kind of situation where you panic. I wasn't actually in any danger."
Cal hesitated, then said, without looking at Ethan: "I panicked. Every time I tried to go and see her, I panicked. I got teary, shaky, sweaty, nauseous… I couldn't deal with it at all."
Ethan stared at him in surprise, then he took Cal's hand and squeezed it. "You should have told me. I would have helped you. We could have gone together."
"But that would have involved speaking to you," said Cal, with a sad smile. "I suppose that scared me too."
Ethan didn't know what to say so he squeezed Cal's hand again and realised that even if Cal had admitted his fear, Ethan might not have listened. He hadn't known his brother as well as he did now.
He caught Cal's eye and there was a moment of awkwardness before they let go of each other's hands.
"But I'm sure you can get through this," said Cal. "Maybe talk to Ben Harding about it. Or buy a book: reading's always been more your thing than talking!"
"I think I'll do both," said Ethan.
"Then there might be something on the internet," said Cal. "Maybe forums where you can talk to other acrophobes. Get new ideas. You can make up your own ideas as well. And also, you could try going out onto the balcony once a day."
Ethan tried not to shudder. He almost managed it.
Cal patted his arm. "It doesn't have to be for long. I can go with you at first. Then we can move on to me going out with you and leaving you, but still hanging around just in case. Whatever you feel you need."
"Thank you," said Ethan. "That would be really helpful."
"The balcony might actually be a nice place for a date," said Cal, a mischievous spark in his eyes. "Moonlight and all that. I'm sure Megan would love it."
Ethan smiled. "I'm sure Megan would love anything if she was with you."
"With me?" Cal started to laugh. "Are you seriously that naïve, Nibbles? It's you she likes. It's you she wanted to hold hands with; you she asked over for dinner…"
"Patients often want to hold hands with the doctors," said Ethan. "It's a comfort thing. Did you seriously not know that?" He laughed. "No wonder you think the entire female population adores you if you're taking that as a demonstration of interest."
Cal actually went slightly red. "Okay, Nibbles. You got me there. But my point stands. Megan likes you. Whenever I try to ask her out for dinner, she's always in a hurry. But she wants to have dinner with you."
"No, she asked both of us," said Ethan. "Why would she want to have dinner just with me?"
Cal laughed. "That's exactly what I've been trying to figure out! No, Ethan, listen to me. Megan likes you. She hardly took her eyes off you the whole time we were there. She called you her hero."
"Which we both know I'm not."
"Of course you are," said Cal. "You saved her life. I managed to patch her leg up, but even once I'd done that, she was on the verge of going into shock. You're the one who prevented that. I couldn't fight my nausea enough to help her, but you did fight your fear. You went on the balcony."
"I suppose I did," said Ethan. "I might not be a Knight in shining armour, but I am pretty Hardy."
Cal smirked. "I'm not sure I'd quite say you're pretty. But do you think Megan's pretty?"
"Well, I, um… yes," said Ethan.
"Then give it a try," said Cal. "Go over and help her when she gets home and see what happens."
"Are you sure you don't mind?" said Ethan. "I know you like her."
Cal shrugged. "I like most women. And after what you did, you deserve first crack at her."
"Caleb!"
"What?"
"Don't speak about Megan like that. Or any woman, I mean."
Cal smiled triumphantly. "You see: you're getting protective already. She's all yours, bro." He paused. "But if Megan does ever sunbathe naked on her balcony… and if you do happen to take a picture on your phone…"
"No!" said Ethan.