Author's spoiler: It's going to be a very nice day at the zoo ;-)

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Fish and chips but no elephants

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At the entrance of the zoo the adults agreed on him paying for the tickets and parking and her paying for everything inside.

"I've come off well." he grinned and ordered a family ticket but his eyes never left Barbara's face. The smile he gave her while he bought it, in fact in the exact moment when he emphasised the word 'family', made her blush because she could not describe it anything other than loving but quickly she dismissed that thought as pure hormone guided fantasy.

The boys impatiently jumped from one foot onto the other while Paula was seated in the borrowed pram together with the bag with all those things you need when you were out on a family day.

Battenberg turned out to be a really good dog. Although he was on alert at every cage he almost always kept still and sat when told most of the time.

"I think he waits for the order to herd them." Barbara explained at the first coral with reindeer. "Let's see what he'll do at the lion's cage. He'll probably try to defend us. His flock so to say." She gave a laugh. "He initially was trained on a sheep farm."

"He's a nice puppy." Tommy knelt down and ruffled the dog's head. "Hm, Battenberg...? You're a good boy, aren't you? Yeees... Sweet little hairy monster, you..."

It's always the same, Barbara thought watching him with a smile. Always fastidious but when it comes to dogs he couldn't care less about his trousers getting dirty with their paws patting him in return to his hugs. "He's yours for the day." With that she gave him the leash.

Their fingers brushed and her heart skipped a beat. Automatically his hand tried to grab hers together with the dog's leash but unfortunately he missed it. Tommy watched her. He believed that Barbara must have felt him reaching for her fingers and if she mirrored his wish to walk hand in hand she would have let him grab it but she only blushed and looked down to her shoes. Inwardly she cursed herself for being such a coward. For this single day she just could pretend being with him. She should have let him take her hand. It would have been nice. But no... Stupid girl!

Making a slightly disappointed sound she turned and pushed Paula's pram towards the next corral.

She looks anxious, Tommy thought. The hope he had for today was not yet fading.

They walked through the zoo with the twins almost every time running ahead to the corrals and then staying longer than the adults wanted. They saw tigers and gorillas, lamas and vultures, got scared while walking through the creepy spiders' world, sighed at those cute penguins and playful seals, fed giraffes and tickled pigs, laughed about the lemurs and Tommy's imitation of King Julien from the film Madagascar.

Tommy and Barbara alternated with pushing Paula's pram and holding the dog's leash until they eventually had the chance to catch a breath with Josh and Ian climbing about on some playground and Battenberg dozing off on the sun flooded gravel. Barbara was bottle-feeding Paula and both adults had their eyes on the twins although Tommy, leaned back against a table and also observing her a bit, was wondering if he was right thinking that she felt the same he felt.

Following a sudden bold impulse he softly massaged her back with one hand. Barbara cringed a bit and briefly turned her head into his direction but realising that he was not freaking her out again like he had done in the spider's world but was gently caressing her she stopped halfway and returned her eyes to the playground, keeping them fixed on a spot she did not really see. Although she felt the blush creeping across her neck again she would not want to break the spell of the moment and he probably was doing it deep in thoughts and without any meaning at all. Since it was entirely relaxing she only leaned back a bit so Tommy also could reach her neck. There was a slightly sizzling but still companionable silence until Barbara had to go to the toilet.

"Would you please hold her for a while, Tommy? She's still not finished with her milk and it looks as if she's taking her time. But I have to... umm... well..."

"Of course." Tommy beamed at Barbara and took the little package. "Here we are, little princess, now who's not hungry?"

Before she left them Barbara saw how gentle Tommy treated Paula who seemed more interested in his beard than in her bottle and was contentedly talking with her boss in her sweet baby chatter. He even answered. Barbara almost fled the scene when tears started filling her eyes. Behind the locked toilet door she waited until the tears subsided and since she then had to compose herself it took a little longer there than usual but Paula still was drinking in Tommy's arms. Barbara took a final deep breath before she approached them again.

Fortunately the twins returned from their adventure and loudly demanded some chips so Barbara was distracted and busy with waiting in the row with the boys minutely wanting something different to eat. Each carrying two huge cups of lemonade, one for each except Paula, Josh and Ian returned to Tommy who had just finished feeding the girl and was putting her back into the pram. Barbara followed with a tray full of fish and chips. Battenberg of course got fed with some proper dog treats they had brought with them.

Afterwards Josh and Ian quietly tried to solve the riddles on the empty styro-cups so Tommy and Barbara had a few more moments of peace before they would go on walking the zoo. That is if Paula would not have started to nag because her nappies had to be changed. Barbara groaned and left the men alone.

Eventually Ian tried to look at his brother's riddle and so he climbed over Tommy's lap without a warning.

"Ho, little man. Your feet aren't supposed to be wiped at my trousers. Keep them down, please!"

"Sorry, Sir!" he plonked into Tommy's lap and exchanged theories on the riddle with his brother.

"Tommy?" Josh asked after a while.

"Yes?"

"Is Babba your girlfriend?" This question came a bit out of the blue but Josh's eyes were only curious and innocent.

"No, she isn't. Why do you ask?"

"Because you look at each other like Mommy 'n' Dad on the picture on Mommy's night stand."

"Do we?" Tommy had a lump in his throat. The boy nodded. He could not know how close he was to the truth. Tommy only thought about trying to catch Barbara's loving look to have proof. He would not miss it if he would get some chance today. Until now for him the day almost had been perfect and he was determined to make it unforgettable for them both.

"I miss him."

"Your dad?"

"M-hm. He's dead, you know. That means he is gone and won't come back." Ian earnestly explained. "Not to us and not to anyone else. And he is not just on a desert island or havin' a long nap. Mommy said it's more like sleepin' forever." A curly head leaned against the man's shoulder from the other side. Tommy deeply felt for them.

"I miss him too. Do you know how long forever is?" Josh asked.

"No. All I know is that it's intangibly long."

"Do you have a dad?"

"I had. And like yours mine too is gone forever."

"Do you miss him?"

"Sometimes. Yes. It's been some years ago when he died."

"Are you sad too?"

"Of course I was." Tommy did not have to tell the entire tragedy. The Asherton family drama surrounding his father's death was a story itself and definitely nothing for the ears of six year old boys. "But the sadness had faded over the years. It will happen to your sadness too. And one day you will think of him and probably only remember the happy times you've had. The void he has left will shrink but he will always be there with you both and Paula and your Mum as long as you will remember him."

"I'll never forget him." Josh firmly said. "We've been to Taronga Zoo once."

"We were in the furni... foonic... funnycollar Safari. That was gorgeous!"

"Like a railway train on a rope." Suddenly the sadness was gone and Josh and Ian were sitting straightened up with beaming eyes.

"And we've seen the elephants from above."

Tommy praised the easily distractible mind of little kids when they almost simultaneously jumped and pulled at both of his hands begging him to pleeeeease go to the elephants right now.

"They don't have elephants, I fear." Before the boys' disappointment would become too great Tommy enfolded the map and pointed at a black and yellow striped cat. "Look! We could go to the tigers."

"Roarrr!" Ian made.

"Yay! Let's go! He's gonna eat ya, Ian!" Josh jumped out of the way of his brother's paw leashing out at him. "C'mon, Tommy, don't be slow!"

"Don't you think we should wait for our ladies?"

When Barbara came out of the baby-care room with a happily chatting little Paula she was welcomed by Tommy with two boys at his hands informing her that the Tiger Territory was next on the list. Battenberg emphasised their begging to hurry up with impatiently yelping happy barks.

On the way there they came across the kangaroos and some emus and Josh and Ian lectured Tommy about the wildlife of Australia but since they knew those animals very well there was not much interest in staying too long at the fences there. Except for the temporary guest display corral of the wombats of course where by chance it was feeding time and Barbara had to stay a bit and watch those cuties. She even lifted Paula who was raising her little arms towards those furry tubbies and loudly demanding to be brought closer to the, like she called it, bambad.

While Barbara talked to the girl and the boys impatiently waited Tommy was flooded with affection. He stood right behind her and would have loved to make that next step and encircle the two from behind. He could nuzzle into her neck and kiss her ear. It was not the sun that made his own ears suddenly glow red. It was his naughty imagination, so he shook his head and made a step to the side in the very moment Barbara made a step backwards.

She had felt him standing close and had debated with herself if she really should lean back into his chest. She could make a simple step and make it look as if it was not on purpose. She was sure that Tommy would at least put his hands on her upper arms. Unfortunately he had been gone when she finally dared to step back.

Only their shoulders bumped.

To top it all the animal attendant lifted the biggest wombat and carried it to the fence so since they were the only visitors standing there at the moment all five could caress Russell. That was the wombat's name the attendant told them and Paula squealed with delight when she buried both of her little hands into the fur. Even Josh and Ian caressed it a bit.

The attendant also added a bit of knowledge into the boys' heads. Apparently listening to him too Tommy and Barbara avoided their fingers coming too close to the other although Barbara dearly wanted to 'accidentally' touch him again and Tommy longed to stroke her hand instead of the animal's back. Thus they were not paying any real attention to what the man told them but focussed on the cuddly marsupial and each other. Nervous eyes flicked to and from the other face until their hands touched anyway.

"Sorry." Barbara whispered almost inaudible and quickly held Paula with both arms again.

"No harm done." his warm voice answered. Encouraged by the shy smile she had given him Tommy put his arm around her shoulders with a firmer smile. It felt wonderful and almost natural and he kept it there until she had to put the baby back into its pram. Barbara felt a slight disappointment but the feeding show was over and Tommy's arms were occupied by the boys again.

Tiger Territory still awaited them.

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