Disclaimer: Everything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer.
Author's Note: Thank you so much for the support and heartfelt reviews. You guys made this story possible, and I can't thank you enough. This chapter is pretty loaded, so I hope you enjoy it :)
Edward POV
It wasn't easy to pretend that Alice wasn't completely avoiding me. She didn't look my way during breakfast, didn't acknowledge me when I walked past her toward the bathroom. She didn't even say anything when I wore a ratty old baseball cap that didn't match my shirt. My sister was completely and utterly gone.
Alice and my mother had left a few minutes earlier to go to the banquet hall at the Fairmount Hotel where we would be having the rehearsal dinner tonight. In just two days, Alice would be married to Jasper. They were going to leave on their honeymoon for three weeks and if Alice didn't talk to Bella and I before then, I wasn't sure how we would work anything out.
As Jasper walked into the living room and sat on the couch opposite of me, a huge grin on his face as he turned on the t.v., I had the sudden urge to just…fucking…tell him. Tell him because he was Jasper and he was my best friend. To be perfectly honest, I was hoping that Alice would have told him by now so it wouldn't be as difficult for us. It was odd that she hadn't, considering that Alice told Jasper everything. But then I realized that it was probably better coming from me.
"Hey, Jasper," I started, leaning forward in my seat, my elbows on my knees.
Jasper turned to me and raised his eyebrows, turning down the volume of the football game that was currently playing. "What's up, dude?"
I let out a heavy breath and decided to just get to the point. "If I tell you something, do you promise not to get mad?" I asked like an idiot.
"What are we, in junior high?" he quipped. "What is it?" He leaned forward, mirroring my position.
"Jasper, you're my best friend. Just know that we didn't keep this from you guys because we didn't trust you or whatever, we just—"
"Dude, Edward, you're freaking me out," he interrupted. "Are you…okay? Is something wrong with you? With Bella?"
"No, no. Nothing like that," I said, shaking my head. I took a few minutes to collect my thoughts and finally, after letting out another deep breath, I decided it was time to get on with it. "About four months ago, on mine and Bella's anniversary, I had to stay a little late at work to finish up some paperwork."
Shit, I was actually doing it. I couldn't stop now, it was too late.
"Anyways," I continued. "As I was getting ready to leave, my secretary…Tanya…she came in and, uh…well…let's just say that Bella walked in on a compromising situation."
"What? Edward, you didn't—"
"No! No, shit, Jasper, you know me better than that!"
Jasper's face softened and he unclenched his fists, nodding. "Yea, I know. I'm sorry. You just made it sound so…" he trailed off, waving his hand in the air and willing me to understand.
"I know, imagine what it looked like," I quipped. "So yea, she walked in and thought that I was having some sort of affair with Tanya. She didn't let me explain and…then some other shit happened that I don't want to get into now, but…we separated for a while and were going to get a divorce."
"What?"
I didn't want him to get angry and interrupt me before I finished, so I continued quickly, "Yea, so that was in March and when Alice called to invite us here, Bella and I had already been separated for three months."
"So when you guys came here…" he trailed off again, trying to understand.
"…we were technically still separated…waiting to get a divorce," I finished for him quietly.
He nodded somberly, looking down at the ground, probably trying to process everything I had just said.
"And then Emmett and Rosalie found out," I went on, causing his head to snap up. "And they started messing with us…playing games, trying to get us back together. But for a while there…it seemed like a lost cause. We just weren't getting along. We didn't ever really talk about what had happened." I swallowed a giant lump in my throat, hating the pain that came with the memories of our time apart. "But then…about two weeks ago, Emmett and Rosalie stranded us on Carlisle's boat and we finally talked." I chuckled to myself, remembering the lengths that those two had gone to just to get us back together.
"Anyways," I said when I realized Jasper was staring at me with a blank expression on his face. "Bella and I have been working through our issues. They're really deep and it's not my place to tell her side of things, but for me it was just…I wasn't as perceptive as I should have been. It bothered her when girls flirted with me and I just sort of ignored it. So when Tanya came into the picture—and Tanya was friendly, if you know what I mean—she thought that I was just going to up and leave her for someone else. Which is ridiculous," I added quietly. "I don't want anybody else, and she knows that. It just took her a while to…fully understand it."
I chanced a glance at Jasper and saw that he was still staring at me blankly. I had told him a pretty simple breakdown of everything that had happened—leaving out some things that were Bella's to tell—and yet he was still just staring at me.
"Jasper," I said quietly. "Can you, uh…say something?"
He slowly leaned back in his seat and placed his hands behind his head as he regarded me closely. I shifted nervously under his gaze and decided that since I had already told him so much, I might as well finish it.
"The divorce papers were set to be mailed to the lake house so we could sign them," I said carefully, watching his expression intently. "I forgot about them, though, after things started getting better with Bella and me. Then I check my voicemail yesterday and I have a message from Felix, our lawyer, saying that the papers would be at the house that day. Bella and I weren't home yet, and Bella didn't even know when they were coming. Then we get here and it turns out that Alice found them and for some reason she opened them. Now she isn't speaking to me or Bella."
I let out a long sigh and sat back in my seat, feeling like a thousand weights had been lifted from my shoulders. It was as if Jasper knew I had to say it all because he didn't interrupt me once.
I looked up at him and saw that he was now staring at the ground, no emotion on his face whatsoever. I decided to let him speak when he was ready, so after a painstakingly slow five minutes—I counted—Jasper finally let out a heavy sigh and looked at me. I looked up at him and waited for him to start talking.
"Do you want a beer? Because I could use a beer," he finally said, getting off the couch and heading to the kitchen. I gaped at him as he walked out of the living room, only to appear a few minutes later with two bottles of beer. He handed one to me and I took it cautiously, watching him as he sat back in his seat and took a long swig of his drink.
I hesitantly took a small sip of my own as I continued watching him curiously. He acted as though I hadn't just told him that Bella and I had basically lied to the entire family for almost four months.
"Are you in shock or something?" I finally asked when he continued to just sit there and drink his beer.
He looked at me and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, tilting his head slightly to the side. "Pardon?"
"Jesus, Jasper!" I exploded, slamming my beer bottle down on the coffee table and standing up. "I just told you that Bella and I have been separated for the last three months and all you do is drink a beer? What the fuck is that? Yell at me! Scream at me, tell me off, something!"
"I'm processing!" he shot back.
I was taken aback by the fact that Jasper had raised his voice—even though I had basically just begged him to—because he didn't do it often. I slowly lowered myself back on the couch and watched him…process.
He processed shit for the next twenty minutes.
"Okay," he finally said, sitting forward again and placing his beer bottle on the coffee table. My own sat forgotten beside his, probably too warm to drink by now. "You and Bella were separated for three months before you came here. And then you, what? Pretended you were married when you got here?"
"For the first couple of weeks…until—"
"Right, the night on the boat," Jasper remembered, waving his hand dismissively. "And the divorce papers were mailed to the house and Alice saw them," he recounted.
I nodded.
"Okay," he sighed. "So she's pissed."
I shrugged. "Honestly, I don't know. I don't know what she's feeling. She's just shutting Bella and I out."
"I don't blame her," Jasper scoffed.
I nodded and looked down at the ground. "So, why aren't you beating the shit out of me right now?" I asked him, only half-joking.
"Why would I do that?"
"Because we lied," I pointed out, looking up at him again. "We lied to all of you. For almost four months, we lied to you."
Jasper nodded slowly. "Yes, and that sucks. But…well…why didn't you tell us?"
"What?" I asked, confused. His question had caught me off guard.
"Why did you and Bella keep it from us? What was the reason?"
I let out a shaky breath. "I don't know," I replied quietly, looking down at the carpet once again. "I guess because we knew it was going to be difficult, so we wanted the divorce to be official before we told anyone. We thought it would make things easier if everything was finalized.
"Then when Alice invited us up here, we didn't want to ruin her wedding. We knew if she knew about this…if anyone did…it would screw up all the wedding plans. No one would have been happy about it. Alice wouldn't have been happy," I stressed softly, picking at a loose thread on my jeans.
"So you didn't tell us because you didn't want to hurt us," Jasper concluded. I looked up at him and nodded again. "That's why I'm not beating the shit out of you right now," he stated simply. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, wanting him to explain.
"Listen, Edward," he sighed. "Lying to us was wrong. And yea, it hurts like hell that you kept something like this from us, but…you and Bella were probably going through a hard enough time already. You didn't need all of us getting involved." He paused for a moment, contemplating his words. "You could have told us, though, you know? I mean… you could have at least told me," he said softly. I could hear the hurt in his voice. "I would have yelled at you guys for being so stupid, but I would have been there for you, too."
"I know, Jasper," I replied sincerely.
"But now, you and Bella…you're…"
"Fine," I finished for him softly. "We're fine."
He nodded slowly. "And that's all that matters, right?"
I watched him for a moment to see if he was being sincere or if he was just masking his anger with fake understanding. Then I realized that this was Jasper, and he didn't hide his emotions. He wore them on his sleeve.
"Yea, that's all that matters," I agreed.
We sat there in relative silence for a few moments, both of us quietly going over the conversation we had just had.
"I wish Alice was as easy as you," I said after another round of silence had passed.
Jasper's head snapped up in my direction and he pursed his lips in contemplation. "Alice is…different, yes," he chuckled softly. "Understand, though, Edward…Alice is Bella's best friend. They used to tell each other everything."
"Used to?" I asked confused.
He nodded. "Yea, they haven't talked much lately. I mean, obviously. You guys are in New York. We're in Seattle. You talk to her, what? Maybe two or three times a month? And she says that she and Bella only talk about once a week."
"So?"
"So," he stressed. "Alice…you know, she should tell you this."
"Yea, but she won't," I reminded him.
"Right," he nodded. "Okay, well, I won't tell you everything. Just like you didn't tell Bella's side, I have no right telling Alice's. But I will say that Alice has been feeling like you guys have drifted apart. You and Bella and her. She feels like since you and Bella went to New York, you forgot about her."
"What?" I asked, shocked. At Jaspers nod of affirmation, I continued, "That couldn't be further from the truth, I haven't forgotten about her," I defended.
Jasper shrugged.
"Do you think I've forgotten about you?" I asked him.
"What did I say earlier? Alice and I are two different people. She's known Bella her whole life, they grew up together. And since you were only a year older than her, you guys were always close. I remember in high school, the three of you hung out together all the time. Took care of each other. When I first started dating Alice, I envied the relationship you all had with each another. I was lucky you guys accepted me."
"Good move there," I teased sarcastically.
"Hardy, har-har," Jasper sneered. "Anyways…you guys have always been close, so when you moved away, Alice kind of lost a whole part of her. I could see it in those first few months, but she stayed strong the best she could. After a year, though, the phone calls started getting less and less. You guys didn't talk as much and…Alice sort of accepted that. She knew you still loved her.
"But then you guys come here for four weeks, barely spend any time with her, and then she discovers that you've been keeping this enormous secret from her for nearly four months. Fuck, dude, as I'm saying all of this it really makes me want to beat the shit out of you right now," Jasper finished, chuckling to himself.
"Do it," I said determinedly as I stood up from the couch.
Jasper stopped laughing instantly and looked up at me bemused. "What?"
"Beat the shit out of me. Punch me, do whatever. I deserve it."
"Edward, I'm not gonna beat you up."
"Come on, I won't fight back," I insisted.
"No," he replied indignantly, standing up and collecting the beer bottles, taking them to the kitchen. I followed close behind him.
"Jasper, beat me up," I urged, making my way over to him. When he put the bottles in the recycling bin and stood up straight, I walked over to him and got right in his face. "Hit me."
"No," he stated firmly.
I pushed his shoulder, but he didn't react.
"Jasper, please."
"No, Edward, what the fuck is wrong with you?"
"I feel like shit," I shrugged.
"And me hitting you will make you feel better?" he asked incredulously.
"Yes."
He raised his eyebrows. "You need help."
"Look, I've been a shitty brother and a shitty friend…and when we tell Esme…shit, she's going to think I'm a shitty son. So just hit me because I deserve it."
"Nice try, but no," he answered stubbornly.
"Fuck, Jasper, just hit me!"
"No."
"Hit me, god damnit!"
Suddenly someone punched me in my back. Hard. I fell forward slightly and Jasper grabbed my arm to help keep me balanced. I turned around and saw Emmett standing there, a wide grin on his face. Rosalie and Bella were standing behind him, both wearing equal looks of confusion on their faces.
"What the fuck, Em?" I yelled, reaching an arm behind me to rub my back.
"You said 'hit me,'" he pointed out.
"I was talking to Jasper."
"Yea, but he was just staring at you, so I did the honors," he smiled.
"Fucking douche bag," I muttered, walking past him to sit at the kitchen table. My back hurt like hell.
"Why were you begging for a beating anyway, Edward?" Rosalie asked, putting the shopping bags she had in her hand on the ground and sitting at the table across from me.
I glared at her. "How long were you guys standing there?" I asked.
"Just long enough to hear you beg Jasper to hit you a couple of times," she replied, smirking at me. "Were you being a naughty boy?"
"Rose," I groaned.
"In all seriousness," she said, sobering up quickly. "What was that all about?"
I sighed and looked at Jasper, who nodded minutely. I turned back to Rosalie and then Bella. "I told Jasper," I stated simply.
Bella's eyes widened slightly, but I didn't have a chance to gauge her reaction because Rosalie started speaking, "You did? Oh my God, what? When? How?"
"After Alice and Esme left to go look at the reception hall for the rehearsal dinner," I replied.
"I see," Rosalie nodded, turning to Jasper. "And what, per chance, did you think about that little plot twist."
"It was definitely shocking," he chuckled.
"You're not mad?" Rosalie asked incredulously.
Jasper looked at me and shook his head, shrugging. "Nope."
"Hmm," she hummed, sitting back in her chair to appraise him. "You always were the sensitive, understanding one, weren't you?"
Jasper smirked. "I try."
"Any luck with Alice?" Emmett asked, taking a bite of the sandwich he had apparently just made.
I shook my head. "No," I sighed. "She and Mom left before I had the chance to talk to her."
"Well, when she comes back you can," Rosalie said reassuringly.
I nodded, offering her a grateful smile. "Hopefully."
"Well, Bella, all you're worrying about how to tell the family may have been for naught. Maybe Edward just has a way with words," Rosalie teased. I chuckled and glanced at Bella, but she didn't crack a smile.
"You told Jasper?" Bella asked me softly, finally speaking for the first time since she came home.
Suddenly I realized that perhaps I should have talked to Bella before I made the decision to tell Jasper everything. But it had all happened so quickly that it never even crossed my mind that Bella might be upset with me for telling him without her.
"Yea. Bella, I'm sorry, I should have talked to you first, but—"
"No, Edward, it's fine. I understand," she replied gently. "You and Jasper are best friends. You had every right to tell him. I'm sort of glad you did. I don't know how I would have been able to." She let out a nervous laugh and Jasper walked over to her, putting his arm around her shoulders and squeezing her gently.
"You're not mad that I didn't talk to you first?" I asked hesitantly.
Bella, who was smiling at Jasper, looked back at me and shook her head. "No, Edward. I mean, I would have liked a little bit of warning so that I could have known what to expect when I came home, but I know you didn't purposely do it behind my back."
"I didn't," I responded fervently.
Bella smiled slightly at me before turning in Jasper's arms and hugging him tightly. He whispered something in her ear and she nodded before they broke apart and Bella walked over to my side.
"We should probably go get ready for tonight," I suggested, taking Bella's hand in mine. My real incentive for going upstairs was being alone with Bella. Preferably naked.
"Good idea," Rosalie smiled, getting up and grabbing her many shopping bags. "And since you're going up, would you mind placing these in mine and Emmett's room?" she asked me sweetly, holding the shopping bags out to me. I glared at her, but took the bags anyways, saying a quick 'goodbye' to Jasper and Emmett as Bella and I headed upstairs.
"Jesus, Rose, did you buy enough?" I called out to her.
"Love you," she sang back.
I just chuckled and shook my head. After placing the bags in Rosalie and Emmett's room, Bella and I headed to our own room and closed the door behind us. I pulled her with me toward the bed and immediately pressed my lips to hers. She giggled softly against my mouth, but pulled away, placing her palms on my chest to keep a distance between us.
"Edward, you said we came upstairs to get ready for tonight," she pointed out.
"So?" I whispered, leaning in to kiss her again, only to have her pull back.
"We have to be at the hotel in two hours and I still need to shower before I can do my hair and make-up," Bella said, looking up at me pleadingly.
"It'll only take five minutes," I promised softly, leaning in again and capturing her mouth in a searing kiss. Much to my dismay, she pulled away again.
"Five minutes?" she asked incredulously.
"I can go for three," I bargained.
She shook her head. "You're going to fuck me for five minutes? Thanks, Edward, don't I feel special."
"Bella," I groaned, tightening my hold around her waist when I felt her pulling away. I made sure that she could feel my erection pressed against her so she would know how much I needed her.
"What do you want, Edward?" she asked me gently.
"I want you to get into that shower with me," I whispered roughly, pressing my lips to her neck and loving how her breathing became shallow. I knew she wanted me just as much as I wanted her; I just had to get her to stop teasing.
"Are you going to fuck me for five minutes?" she asked quietly, her voice shaking slightly.
"I'm going to fuck you for as long as you want," I murmured, dragging my lips across the sensitive flesh behind her ear, down to her neck and collarbone.
"Mmm," she moaned. "We don't have a lot of time."
"I don't care."
And with that, I removed her clothing while she did the same for me. And within minutes, I had her pressed up against the shower wall, the hot water cascading down on us both.
"God, I can never get enough of you," I breathed against her chest as I took her nipple into my mouth and sucked gently.
She moaned in response and fisted her hands in my hair. I pulled away from her breast and trailed my kisses back up to her neck, along her jaw, until I finally kissed the corner of her mouth.
"Get inside me, Edward," she whispered urgently.
I didn't need her to tell me twice.
I grabbed her right leg and hoisted it up to wrap around my waist while I opened her up to me. I slid one finger inside of her to make sure she was ready—and fuck was she ready—before I finally sheathed myself inside of her. We both moaned at the sensation and I held still for a moment, enjoying the feeling of having her wrapped around me.
Gradually, I began moving until I set a quick and steady pace for us both. Bella held onto my shoulders and I kept one of my arms firmly around her waist while the other was groping her thigh that was wrapped around me. The sounds she was making—the moaning and heavy breathing—was all getting to be too much for me and I knew I wouldn't be able to hold out much longer.
"Bella, I'm really close," I gasped as I continued to plunge into her. I was going faster and harder without even realizing it, but I needed to get us both to ecstasy together.
"It's too much, Edward," she panted. "God, it's too much."
I immediately reached between us and began rubbing her clit with my thumb, using the same erratic and fervent pace I was using to thrust into her. Within a few minutes, I heard Bella's sharp intake of breath and looked up just in time to see her squeeze her eyes shut tightly and moan my name. The noises she was making sent me over the edge and I shuddered violently before spilling inside of her.
I slid my hand from Bella's thigh up to her ass and squeezed it tightly as I rested my head in the crook of her neck. We both continued to pant heavily as we came down from our high. After about five minutes, when I was certain we had both caught our breaths, I released Bella's ass with one final squeeze and helped her put her foot back on the ground. I pulled away from her far enough so that I could see her face.
"Was that good?" I teased quietly.
She finally looked up at me and I could see her chest still heaving slightly from breathing so hard. "Yea," she gasped. "That was definitely good."
I smirked at her before pressing my lips firmly to hers and whispering my love for her. After about thirty minutes of lingering touches and soft kisses, Bella and I finally finished our shower and hopped out to get dressed for the rehearsal dinner.
I slipped on my black boxer briefs before going into the small closet and taking down one of the suits I had brought with myself on this trip. After pulling the black slacks on, I sat on the edge of the bed and put on my shoes and socks before standing back up and slipping on the white dress shirt and then tying my tie. Just as I was buttoning the cuffs on my sleeves, the bathroom door opened.
"Edward, can you zip me up?" Bella asked softly.
I nodded and finished buttoning my cuffs before finally looking up at her. I stopped in my tracks and just gazed at the vision before me. Bella was wearing the most beautiful midnight blue dress that ended above her knees. It was slightly off her shoulders and because she had put her hair up in a messy pony tail, her neck and delicious collarbone were left exposed to my hungry eyes.
I approached her slowly, moving to stand behind her as I slowly and gently began pulling the zipper up the back of her dress. I took my time and probably touched more than necessary, but I wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to revel in the sheer beauty that was Bella.
"You're breathtaking," I whispered, placing a kiss on the back of her neck when I finished zipping up the dress.
"Thank you," she replied softly. She turned around in my arms and wrapped her arms around my neck, smiling up at me. "You look amazing, Edward."
I smiled down at her and leaned in, pressing my lips gently to hers. "Thank you," I whispered against her lips. There was suddenly a light knock at the door and Bella and I both pulled away from each other. I nodded to her to answer the door as I slipped on my suit jacket.
Bella walked over to the door and pulled it open. I looked over just in time to see Alice appear in the doorway, a blank expression on her face as she looked at Bella and then me and then back at Bella.
"Come on, I need to do your hair and make-up," Alice murmured softly, waiting for Bella to follow her.
Instead, Bella looked back at me anxiously before meeting Alice's gaze again. "You're still doing my hair and make-up?" Bella asked uncertainly.
"I always do your hair and make-up," was Alice's quiet response as she turned around and started down the hall toward her and Jasper's room. I watched Bella stand there confused for a minute before she finally cast another wary glance over her shoulder at me and followed after Alice.
I was left in a daze at Alice's behavior, but simply shook my head to clear my thoughts. I finished getting ready and walked out of the bedroom and down the hall to Alice and Jasper's room. I pressed my ear to their door and when I didn't hear anything, I stepped away and walked towards the stairs, hoping to God that Alice and Bella were going to be alright in there.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Bella POV
I was hesitant in following Alice to her room. Oh, who was I kidding? I was fucking terrified.
I walked behind Alice into their bedroom and then to their bathroom, taking a seat in the vanity chair in front of the mirror that I usually occupied when Alice was doing my hair and make-up.
I was shocked, to say the least, when Alice came to help me get ready. Granted she always helped me get ready, but I figured after everything that had happened, the last thing she would want to do was be in a room alone with me. But now that we were alone, I was praying that we would be able to talk. Really talk.
Alice wordlessly got to work taking down my ponytail and running a brush quickly through my hair. I looked up in the mirror at her and saw that she was concentrating on the task at hand and paying no attention whatsoever to me. I took in the beautiful, dark purple dress she had on and I also noticed that she had already done her own hair and make-up.
"You look beautiful, Alice," I said softly.
I noticed her movements stutter for a minute before she composed herself and got to work teasing my hair and making the natural waves I already had more apparent. She worked in silence for a few minutes and I realized that I would have to be the one to initiate conversation. I looked down at my lap, trying to think of some way to begin, when a memory came to mind and a small smile overtook my face.
"Do you remember that summer when I was twelve and you were eleven, and Carlisle put that tire swing up in your backyard for us?" I began quietly, still smiling. I looked up in the mirror and saw Alice had stopped what was doing and was looking down at the top of my head. "We were so upset that I was going to junior high and we'd be split up for a whole year that…your dad went out and got us something that we could share together. We used to go out there everyday, and then after a while it became the place you and I would go to talk and share secrets," I continued, still watching her even though she still wasn't looking at me. "Like when I went on that date with Bret in eighth grade and he was a total douche. We went out to that swing for hours and you just talked to me and made me feel better.
"Or when you didn't get the lead in the school play your freshman year in high school, and your mom gave us that pint of Rocky Road ice cream and we took it out to the swing and just laid on the grass all day. We didn't even have to sit on the swing sometimes. Sometimes just being near it helped. It was our own special place, somewhere where we could go and say everything we needed to say without worrying about being judged or anything."
Alice was now looking at the ground and I let out a heavy sigh, shifting my focus once again to my lap. "I could really use that swing right about now, Alice, how 'bout you?" I breathed our shakily, forcing a weak laugh even though it ended up sounding chocked with the tears that were now threatening to escape. "I feel like it was easier to talk back then," I added softly.
It was silent for a really long time after that and I began to feel stupid for even bringing up the whole tire swing thing when Alice clearly didn't want to talk to me. I was about to tell her to forget it and just move on with fixing my hair, when she spoke.
"Where have you been, Bella?" she murmured quietly.
I looked up at the mirror and saw that she was looking at me through it as well. "What do you mean?" I asked, my eyebrows furrrowing in confusion.
"I mean where have you been?" she repeated, raising her voice slightly. "Because for the last three years, I feel like you've just been missing."
"What do you mean by that? Three years, what is that?" I asked her, remembering her saying something similar yesterday.
"What I mean by that is you and Edward moved to New York and just forgot about me," she snapped, her anger finally coming to the surface.
I shook my head furiously as her words registered. "That's not true," I stated firmly.
"Oh yea? Because I only hear from you once, maybe twice a week if I'm lucky. I mean, for God's sakes, Bella, I invited you and Edward here for my wedding and I've only seen you a handful of times! And now I find out that you and Edward are getting a divorce? I mean, okay, fine it may not be any of my business, but I'm pretty sure it's common courtesy to just come right out and say your getting a divorce rather than lie to everybody!"
"Alice—"
"And you know, divorce is beside the point! I don't care! Don't tell me, fine! All I want to know is what happened to my best friend?" she asked, her voice breaking slightly on the last word as a tear slipped down her cheek. "What happened to my brother? When you and Edward went to New York and left everything behind…I didn't think that meant that you would leave everyone behind, too.
"For the last three years, I've been trying to convince myself that we weren't drifting apart. That you and Edward would always be here. That we'd always be there for each other. But that's really fucking hard to do, Bella, when your best friend and brother—two of the people that you trust more than anything in the world—barely have time to call you and then show up for four weeks and barely spend any time with you! And on top of all that, you find out that they've been keeping this huge secret from everybody. Like it doesn't even fucking matter!
"You guys just forgot about everything and everyone you left behind when you moved away. And now you don't even share anything about your lives with us," Alice finished, panting heavily at that point as tears fell freely from her eyes.
I sat there, my mouth parted slightly, as Alice stormed out of the bathroom. I played back everything she had just said and realized that Edward and I hadn't thought a lot about what it would do to our families when we up and left everything behind. I never once gave a second thought to how hard it would be for Charlie or Esme or…Alice.
Moving away from the family and life that I loved was so hard for me and I knew it was hard for Edward, too. But we stayed strong because we had careers and a future to tend to. Life just got in the way and—just like Alice had said—we had drifted apart. I just never noticed it until now. New York was fast paced and Edward and I were so busy starting our new lives that checking in with our families regularly became a hassle for us. I didn't realized how much all of that had affected anybody until now.
I sat there for a while longer as silent tears fell down my face. I was about to get up and leave, figuring Alice wasn't coming back and probably wanted me gone, when she walked back in, holding a box of tissues in her hand and dabbing at her eyes with one of them.
"Here," she said, thrusting the box in my hands.
I chuckled weakly through my own tears and took a couple of tissues, wiping at my own eyes. "Thanks," I whispered.
Alice nodded and set the tissue box on the vanity before leaning back against it so she was across from me.
"Alice," I began softly, staring down at my lap like a coward. "I'm so sorry Edward and I made you feel like we forgot about you. About all of you. We just…when we moved to New York, there was so much to do to get settled. And then we had our jobs and you had your job and…we just…drifted apart," I murmured, repeating her own words from earlier.
"I'm sorry, too, Bella," she whispered, causing me to look up at her confused. "God, I shouldn't have held all that in for the last three years." She looked down and shook her head, chuckling humorlessly.
"Alice, Edward and I aren't getting a divorce—"
"Why are you and Edward getting a divorce?"
Alice and I both talked over each other and laughed softly at our similar thinking. I could tell when what I had said registered in Alice's mind, because she looked up at me and her eye widened immensely.
"You're…you're not?" she asked, stunned and confused.
I shook my head. "No."
"But…the papers…they said—"
"I know," I sighed, letting out a deep breath. "It's such a huge, complicated mess of a story. And if you have time," I began softly, looking up at her hesitantly, "I could really use a tire swing moment."
Alice's face transformed into a soft smile as she grabbed my hand and led me to the bed. We sat down side by side, Alice's hand in mine as I rested my head on her shoulder.
"Four months ago, on mine and Edward's three year anniversary, I went to surprise him at work…"
And so we sat there for the next hour as I relayed the entire story to Alice. I told her about walking in on Edward and Tanya and then segued to my insecurity issues and how she, better than anyone, knew that I had had them pretty much my entire life. I told her how I projected my insecurities onto Edward and how he was so quick to dismiss them. I explained to her that although I should have trusted him, he, too, knew that he shouldn't have ignored my issues.
I told her about Jacob, too, and how I had foolishly found solace in him when I returned to the apartment. I relayed the painful three month separation and our logic behind keeping our impending divorce a secret—our logic was that we just didn't want to have to hurt them.
I then told her about mine and Edward's plan to keep it a secret when we came to the lake house because we didn't want to ruin Alice's wedding. Telling her about Rosalie and Emmett finding out was extremely difficult because I could tell she was hurt by the fact that all four of us had been keeping this a secret for the last few weeks.
I described the games that Rosalie and Emmett played in an attempt to push Edward and I together—including the drunken sex, which Alice found most amusing. Then came the night on the boat when everything finally came to a head. I told her about what Edward and I had talked about, what we both needed to work on, and what had happened to cause such strife in our relationship.
I let her know that for the last two weeks, we hadn't been faking it anymore. I told her that I felt that mine and Edward's connection was stronger than it had ever been before. I even told her about the divorce papers and why they had been mailed to the lake house and she explained to me how it was an accident that she had discovered them.
Once we finished discussing mine and Edward's relationship over the last few months, I brought up everything that she had said earlier. Alice finally told me exactly how she felt after Edward and I moved away. She had tried to stay strong, knowing we all had our own lives to live. She told me how hard it had been for everyone after we left, but how they eventually accepted it while she just couldn't.
I understood her completely. Alice, Edward, and I had always been extremely close and then suddenly Edward and I left, breaking up our dynamic trio. I told her that was never our intention and how we should have made more of an effort to reach out to everybody after we left. I also told her that the last thing Edward and I would ever want was to drift apart from the people that we loved. Alice seemed to understand and accept everything that I was saying and I was happy when I finally saw that spark in her eye that I had been missing.
I hadn't realized how much I had missed Alice—what with everything that had been going on for the last few months. We both made each other a promise not to let things get this far ever again. Lack of communication was what had almost torn Edward and I apart, and I told Alice I would never forgive myself if I made that mistake again with anybody else.
I let out a heavy breath when we were finally finished speaking. Alice and I had shifted positions during our long conversation and I was now laying back on the bed, resting on my elbows, while Alice sat cross-legged beside me. We sat there in relative silence for a few minutes before the bedroom door was pulled open and Rosalie stood there in her stunning maroon, silk dress.
"Hey, thanks for inviting me to the party," she quipped sarcastically, walking into the room and shutting the door behind her. "Are you two hoes friends again?"
"We never stopped being friends, Rose," Alice answered. I looked at her and smiled while she winked back at me.
"Good, because I missed us," Rosalie smiled, sitting on the bed beside me. "Jesus, Bella, nice hair."
My eyes widened at her comment at the same time that Alice clamped a hand over her mouth and looked at the alarm clock on the beside table.
"Oh, shoot, we have to be at the hotel in thirty minutes!" Alice shrieked, jumping off the bed and running into the bathroom.
I hopped off the bed and followed after her, Rosalie trailing right behind me. I plopped down in the chair and Rosalie and Alice got to work fixing my hair and make-up. It took about fifteen minutes for them to rush through everything, but the final product looked like it had taken hours. Alice left for a second to go get my shoes while Rosalie leaned against the vanity across from me, much like Alice had done earlier.
"So?" she prompted, crossing her arms over her chest.
"So," I shrugged, looking at myself in the mirror and loosely running my fingers through my hair a few times.
"So, how did it go? Telling Alice?" Rosalie asked me.
I let out a heavy sigh and looked up at her. "It went…well. I definitely learned some things."
"Like what?" Rosalie asked curiously.
I looked down at my lap and let out a small laugh. "Uh…like…like, just a lot of things," I responded vaguely, looking up at Rosalie once again and smirking. She glared at me.
"Fine, be all evasive," she huffed, turning to look at herself in the mirror.
After a few minutes, I asked her the question that was burning deep inside me. "Rose? Do you think we're drifting apart?"
She looked up at me through the mirror and furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. "Who?" she asked.
"Us. All of us."
She stared at me for a moment before shaking her head slowly. "Of course not, why would you ask that?"
"It's just…Edward and I live over two thousand miles away. And I know ever since we moved out to New York, we haven't made a lot of time for all of you and—"
"Distance doesn't mean anything, Bella," Rosalie interjected. "It doesn't matter if your five minutes away or six hundred thousand miles away. We're always with each other."
I gaped at Rosalie for a minute, not used to this sudden sensitivity. Alice walked back into the room, holding my heels in her hand. When she noticed that Rosalie and I were both misty-eyed and staring at each other in the mirror, she looked at us confused.
"What's wrong?" she asked.
I shook my head, trying to gather my thoughts. "Nothing. I'm just…I'm really lucky to have you guys," I answered lamely. "I never want to take any of you for granted."
Alice smiled softly at me as Rosalie wiped a few stray tears away.
"Are you crying?" Alice asked her, shocked.
"No," Rosalie replied quickly, shielding her face from view.
"You dirty little liar," Alice countered, smiling devilishly. "You so are."
Rosalie finally turned to look at us with puffy red eyes. "No, I'm not," she replied sternly.
"Come on, Alice, we gotta go," I told her, standing up from the chair and grabbing my shoes.
"Bella," Alice called out at me as I slipped on the heels and made my way toward the door. I turned around and looked at her, raising my eyebrows for her to continue. "You look beautiful tonight," she smiled.
I couldn't help the wide smile I gave her in return. "Thanks, Alice," I whispered.
"Hey, what about me?" Rosalie chimed in, putting her hands on her hips. Alice and I exchanged a quick glance and shook our heads, laughing quietly.
"Don't ever change, Rose," I giggled softly. "I mean that."
Rosalie nodded and smirked as she walked past me. "Don't worry. I'll be a raging bitch forever."
Alice and I smiled and watched as Rosalie left the room to head downstairs. I turned back to Alice and offered her a reassuring smile.
"This is it. Your rehearsal dinner," I told her gently. "Two more days."
She nodded and her face broke out into a wide smile once again. "I missed you, Bella."
"I missed you, too. Now let's go. We're being such stereotypical woman right now, taking so long."
Alice laughed softly and walked over to me, taking my hand in hers as we left the room and headed downstairs. Now all that was left to do was tell Carlisle and Esme about what had happened between Edward and I. I had been so afraid and hesitant to tell anyone about it before, but now I just wanted to finish it and get it over with so that Edward and I could finally move forward.
It did, however, bring up the concern that I should probably tell Charlie and Renee since they would be at the wedding, but I figured I would deal with that when the time came. Now that Edward and I had overcome our issues, I wasn't ashamed or afraid to tell them what had happened. Edward and I had gone through hell and back for three months, and yet we came out on the other side stronger than ever.
I snapped out of my thoughts when Alice and I reached the last step and Edward turned in our direction, his eyes landing on the two of us. Then his gaze fell to mine and Alice's joined hands, and he smiled.
Author's Note: I'm sorry I couldn't work in the coming clean with Carlisle and Esme in this chapter—it'll come in the next one as will the rehearsal dinner. This chapter was just getting far too long and I knew it wouldn't all fit. I can't wait to hear your thoughts on this chapter :) Thank you for reading.