Chapter 13

While Siroc headed off to deal with D'Artagnan, Jacqueline returned to her quarters and changed into a clean uniform, and then Ramon took her to the Café Nouveau to get some breakfast after a brief stop by Duval's office to reclaim her sword. The mood at the café was unusually somber. Apparently, news of the Legend's demise had traveled pretty fast. Even the typically cheery waitresses were in mourning.

The musketeer duo sat down at their group's usual table, and Ramon ordered them each a bowl of coffee and a plate of whatever the house special was. It took longer than usual for their order to arrive, and when it did, what they got wasn't quite up to the café's usual standards. Of course, given the circumstances, it was perfectly understandable, so they simply made due. Well…Ramon did, anyway. Jacqueline tried, but in spite of the fact that she hadn't had any food in over a day, she just couldn't bring herself to eat anything. All she could think about was D'Artagnan.

"¿Está bien usted? (Are you okay?)"

She shook her head. "I'm sorry…it's just…I'm still trying to figure out what went wrong in there. I mean, one minute D'Artagnan's professing his undying love, and the next he's a snarling beast. Why would he turn on me like that? What's going on?"

Ramon shrugged. "I wish I knew amiga. I've known D'Artagnan for a couple of years, now, and he's never acted like this before. Sure, he's a bit impulsivo, but it's never been this bad."

Jacqueline sighed, taking a sip of her coffee. "You know, I can't help but think that maybe it's my fault…I somehow brought this on myself. If I'd been a normal woman who could grow old and have kids…."

"Nonsense. Don't even think like that."

"Why shouldn't I? If I was able to have children of my own, there wouldn't have even been a fight in the first place."

"But that's not your fault. He's the one placing so much importance on continuing his bloodline. Personally, I think the whole thing about 'noble blood' es sandeces anyway. As your amigo and musketeer brother, I say this to you: you are a beautiful, intelligent, and absolutely amazing woman. Any man would be lucky to have you even interested in him. And if D'Artagnan can't see that, he is un tonto. It's his loss, and you deserve better. Comprende?" Giving her a reassuring smile, Ramon reached out and laid a hand on her shoulder. She nodded.

"Thank you."

"De nada." He pulled his hand back, returning his attention to the meal in front of him. Jacqueline sipped some more of her coffee, letting her eyes wander the room.

Just then, the door of the café opened, admitting a beaming Giselle inside. She bubbled over to a group of waitresses, showing off something on her left hand. Their mood suddenly seemed to lift, and they began cooing excitedly over whatever news the dressmaker had brought. Jacqueline couldn't hear most of the conversation, but one name came through loud and clear—D'Artagnan. And it didn't take a brain like Siroc's to figure out what was going on.

Seeing red, Jacqueline shot to her feet, automatically reaching for her blade. Ramon was behind her in seconds, hands latching onto her shoulders. "Calmas," he whispered.

"Calm?" she hissed. "You expect me to be calm? It wasn't even an hour ago that D'Artagnan was asking ME to marry him. He sure as hell moved on pretty damn fast. I ought to go right over there and…."

"And what? Accuse her of stealing your man? Jacqueline Roget is supposed to be dead, remember? You're Jacques LePonte now. And Jacques would have absolutely no reason to be angry about his comrade proposing to the lovely Giselle. You can go over and offer your congratulations, or you can sit down and pretend you didn't see her come in, but I won't let you compromise your identity by rushing over there and launching yourself at her like a jilted bride. Okay?"

As his words sank in, some of the anger faded. He was right, of course. She sighed, shrugging off Ramon's grip and sinking back down into her seat. The Spaniard sat back down as well, attempting once again to finish his meal. Jacqueline picked up her coffee, and was about to finish it when her head was filled with a sensation that was growing more and more familiar. She quickly drained the last of the drink, then turned her head in time to see Siroc walk into the café, followed by a cowed D'Artagnan.

Naturally, as soon as Giselle caught sight of her fiancée, she rushed over. They kissed, and it took every ounce of self-control Jacqueline possessed not to visibly react. Her hand traveled once more to the hilt of her rapier, gripping it tightly as she tried to calm herself.

Once the pair parted, D'Artagnan made his way over to the table. "Jacques, can we talk?"

She glared. "I have nothing to say to you, D'Artagnan. Why don't you go spend some time with your new fiancée?"

He sighed. "Okay, I deserved that. But please…just hear me out."

Jacqueline looked around the room, then nodded. "Fine. Let's take this outside, shall we?" Not waiting for an answer, she grabbed D'Artagnan's arm and steered him out the café's rear door, into the alleyway behind the establishment. Still gripping the hilt of her sword, she pushed him against the wall, scowling as she stared him down. "This had better be good."

D'Artagnan hung his head, too ashamed to even look her in the eyes. "I…I'm sorry, Jacqueline. I shouldn't have let things get out of hand like that."

"Out of hand?" she hissed. "You HIT me, D'Artagnan. And that was after you asked me to be your whore. I'd say 'out of hand' is one hell of an understatement."

Cringing as her words hit home, he eventually managed a slight nod. "I know. I'm an idiot. Short tempers run in the family, or so it would seem, and I foolishly allowed the events of the past couple of days eat away at the control I thought I had over mine. In the end, I took everything out on you…the worst decision I've ever made." He sighed, daring a glance into her eyes. "I don't expect you to forgive me, Jacqueline. Hell, I'm not even sure I can forgive myself for this."

"Then what do you expect, exactly?"

"Honestly…I have no idea. All I know is that I don't want to lose my best friend."

"Friend?" she asked, releasing her grip on her sword and leaning against the opposite wall. "Is that all I am to you, D'Artagnan? Just a friend?"

"I do believe I said 'best' friend. Jacqueline, you probably know me better than anyone."

She sighed, shifting her gaze to the ground in front of her. "Up until this morning, I thought I did. But whoever was in that room with me was a total stranger. The D'Artagnan I know and consider a friend would never have said those things, let alone strike me."

"I know," he said quietly.

"And frankly," she continued, as if he hadn't spoken, "I'm not sure which hurt me worse. The actual blow, or the fact that you suddenly decided that I'm not good enough to be your wife just because I can't have children." At that, Jacqueline met his eyes once more. When she did, D'Artagnan could see the pain and anger in her own. "And then to see you with Giselle, not even an hour after our fight. I suppose she's more worthy because she can give you your damned heirs…."

"No, that's not…." He sighed. "Look…Jacqueline, I do love you, and I always will. The fact that you can't have children doesn't make you less worthy of anything, and I'm a fool for saying otherwise. But, that being said, I don't think it would ever work between us."

"Why not? Is it because I'm immortal?"

"Sort of…but it's not you. It's me."

"Meaning…?"

He took a deep breath, averting his eyes as he could no longer bring himself to meet hers. "I wish to God I didn't feel this way, but part of me can't help but resent your immortality. Yes, I know that you didn't exactly choose to be this way, but it's just hard for me to accept that we can't grow old together as we'd planned, or that there's always going to be this part of your life that I'll never be able to fully understand. If we did get married, sooner or later we'd end up hating each other. And I couldn't bear that." Another sigh, and D'Artagnan dared to shift his gaze back to her eyes. "I know it's too late to take back what happened in my quarters, and I realize that proposing to Giselle so soon was rather insensitive of me, but maybe it's for the best. If you could find it in your heart to forgive me, I would like very much to remain your friend, even if we're not as close as we used to be." A hopeful expression crossed his features, his mouth twisting itself into the odd little half-smile that seemed to be reserved only for her.

Jacqueline absently rubbed her chin as she considered his words. Loathe as she was to admit it, D'Artagnan had a point. Would marriage really be worth it if they'd both just end up miserable? She still loved him, even after what happened, but the incident had made it quite clear that her immortality was too great a barrier for their relationship—at least in the romantic sense of the word—to overcome.

As she pondered this latest development, Jacqueline could almost hear her mother's voice ringing in her ears. 'If you love someone, cherie, sometimes you have to let them go.' At the time, her mother had been referring to a favorite pet that had to be given away when they could no longer afford to care for it, but the advice seemed just as sound now as it did back then.

Jacqueline sighed, knowing what she had to do. But first, there was something she needed to know. Pushing away from the wall, she moved in closer to D'Artagnan. "Do you love her?" she asked, looking him straight in the eyes.

"W-what?"

"Giselle. Do you love her, or is she just a substitute for me?"

"Truthfully? I do care about Giselle, a lot."

"But do you love her?"

"It's complicated, Jacqueline."

"It shouldn't be. Either you love her, or you don't. Which is it?"

"I suppose I do."

Jacqueline's eyebrow shot up. "Suppose?"

He sighed. "My feelings for Giselle aren't quite as deep or passionate as those I had for you, but that doesn't mean it's not love. Just a different sort. I can honestly see spending the rest of my life with her."

"Feelings you 'had' for me? Are you saying that they've suddenly disappeared?"

"You know what I mean."

"Do I?"

D'Artagnan frowned. "What's with the interrogation session? I already said I was sorry."

"I just want to make sure that you're marrying this girl for the right reasons, that's all."

"Don't worry. I'm not doing it out of spite, if that's what you're getting at. I didn't just leap into the arms of the nearest interested female after our fight, as I'm sure Siroc believes. In truth, I've been attracted to Giselle for almost as long as I've liked you. My feelings for you were just stronger. But Giselle is also a beautiful woman, with a good heart. And a strong woman as well. She stood up to the Darkwoods Gang when they threatened her and her mother, even though doing so nearly got her killed. Frankly, I think I'm lucky that she still wants to be with me, even after I virtually abandoned her to pursue you. So yes, I'm marrying her for the right reasons. I really do want to spend my life with Giselle. She'll never want for anything, and I won't leave her lonely like my father did to my mother. I just want to make her happy."

Jacqueline nodded. "Well, see to it that you do." Her hands shot out, grabbing the front of his shirt and pulling him close. "I'll be keeping an eye on you, D'Artagnan, and if I ever hear that you've hurt her in any way, you'll find yourself a foot shorter and an octave higher. Am I making myself clear?"

D'Artagnan looked her in the eyes, and it was clear that she was deadly serious. He gulped. "A-absolutely. Couldn't be clearer."

"Good." She released her grip, stepping back to give him some breathing room. "I presume you haven't changed your mind about the musketeers."

He shook his head. "I liked being a musketeer, don't get me wrong. But it's just not the most important thing in my life. If I had to choose between the musketeers and my family, family would win every time. I was ready to leave when I thought Little D was my son, and if you'd ever said yes any of the times I asked you to run off with me, I would've resigned in a heartbeat. Serving the King is a noble calling, to be sure, but frankly, I'd much prefer to die an old man in my bed, surrounded by friends and family, than to get myself killed in the line of duty like Father. And if that makes me a coward, so be it. I'd rather be a coward than to have my children always wondering why their father is never around."

"You're not a coward, D'Artagnan. In fact, I think it's admirable that you're willing to give up a life of adventure in order to raise a family. Not many men would."

"Thank you…for understanding, I mean. I was half-afraid you'd try to drag me kicking and screaming back to Duval."

She chuckled. "Tempting as that sounds, it is your life. Who am I to tell you what to do with it? Just promise that you'll at least visit once in awhile."

"Not a problem. In fact, I plan on returning to the city at least a few times a month." Her eyebrow shot up, and he quickly waved her off. "Not like that. See, Siroc has this friend at St. Julien's…Father Daruis. He's agreed to help me learn to control myself better so that incidents like the one this morning don't happen again. And once I finish talking to him, I see no reason why I couldn't swing by the garrison for a bit before going home. Of course, you all are more than welcome to come visit my estate as well. Even Siroc."

"So you've forgiven him?"

"Not quite, but I figure I should at least give him another chance. He might've screwed things up as Uncle Aramis, but Siroc has been a pretty good friend. It'd be a shame to throw that away over a few mistakes."

"My sentiments exactly," she said, actually smiling at him.

"So…we're good, then?"

"Almost." All of a sudden, her fist shot forward, catching D'Artagnan right across the jaw and sending him sprawling on the ground. "Now, we're good." Jacqueline held out her hand, which he grabbed, allowing her to help him up while he used the other one to rub his sore jaw.

"I suppose I had that coming."

"You could say that. So, shall we head back inside before your fiancée decides to send out a search party?"

He nodded, and the two returned to the café, where their friends and Giselle were patiently waiting.

"Work everything out okay?" Siroc asked, absently noting the bruise forming on D'Artagnan's jaw.

Jacqueline nodded. "Pretty much."

As she spoke, Giselle rushed over to her fiancée. "Did he hurt you?" she asked, gently running her fingers along his jaw line.

"I'm fine, Giselle," D'Artagnan assured her. "Believe me, this is nothing."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

Siroc cleared his throat, interrupting the lovebirds just as they were about to kiss. "Well, as lovely as this has been, we musketeers really should be heading back to the garrison. Are you sure you don't want to join us, D'Artagnan?"

"I'm sure. Tell the captain I'll be by later to hand in my official resignation."

Siroc nodded. "Very well. Jacques, Ramon…let's get back before Duval decides to make us clean the dungeons or something."

"Good idea," Jacqueline agreed. She looked over at D'Artagnan and Giselle. It still hurt to see them together, but all she really wanted was for him to be happy. And if it took marrying the dressmaker for that to happen, then she'd just have to live with it. "Good luck, D'Artagnan," she said, giving him a small smile. "I'll see you later, right?"

"Count on it."

They shook hands, then she moved over to join Siroc. Ramon said his goodbyes to their onetime comrade as well, and the musketeer trio made their way back to the garrison.