Lance loved beer. Everyone knew that Lance and his beers had a special relationship that even Bobbi couldn't fathom. One Saturday afternoon, after being stuck in the lab for two hours with Fitzsimmons rambling about some science garble, he sat in the lounge with a raging headache, nursing a bottle of beer. He took a sip and squinted his eyes shut, rubbing his forehead with the cool bottle. He let out a ragged sigh, leaned his head back and prepared himself for a nap.

"Lance, I'm bored," came a little voice from behind the couch. He jumped, and then groaned. Of course Brynn would be here. He liked the kid just fine, he was actually quite fond of her, but he had one problem. He wasn't allowed to drink beer in a room with just him and her. Coulson's rules. Stupid rules, but then again, he quite deserved it.

Lance was lying on the couch drinking a bottle of beer, with Brynn sitting on his stomach. He had just taught her a little bit how to spar (don't tell Coulson! He had whispered slyly), and now they were both exhausted and sweaty.

"Lance, is that cream soda?"

Lance took a swig from the bottle, and was about to tell her it was a beer, when he got a brilliant idea.

"Of course it is, darling. Want to try some?" How hilarious would it be to see a drunk eleven year old?

"Sure!" Lance sat up and held the cold bottle to Brynn's lips.

"You can take a nice, big mouthful!" he encouraged. She was just taking a sip when…

"LANCEAREYOUFEEDINGHERBEER?"

Bobbi, Skye, Simmons and May were standing in the doorframe, aghast, horrified, scared and murderous, respectively, all four of them clearly misinterpreting the empty second bottle on the coffee table. Brynn, in shock, swallowed a mouthful.

"Blegh! This cream soda is nasty!" She spluttered, wiping her tongue on Lance's shirt.

"No, no, no, no, no!" yelled Simmons running forward, snatching Brynn from Hunter's lap. Hunter had dropped his bottle and was frozen in fear. "Now look, Lance! You just intoxicated a CHILD! Now I have to run blood alcohol level tests on her and make sure she won't get drunk! What were you thinking?"

"Were you thinking?" screeched May.

Everyone began scolding him for being so stupid, yelling at him for corrupting the minds of young children, and hissing some things at him that Brynn unfortunately heard as Simmons hurried her to the lab.

"Jemma, what does fu—"

"No, no, it's a very bad word that you cannot use."

She hustled Brynn into the lab and plopped her onto a tall lab chair, and immediately began to fumble around with her needles.

"What's going on?" asked Fitz.

Jemma huffed out angrily with "Lance", "beer", "idiot", "blood test", and "clump-nugget" inserted in various places in her jumbled response.

Fitz stood there for a moment, until he got the gist of what she was saying, and then ran off to the lounge.

Hunter was cowering on the couch, with the three women glowering over him, and he was squeaking

"It was just one sip! It was a joke! Don't tell Coulson! She'll be fine! Just a little sip! Please don't tell Coulson! She won't get drunk! Don't let Coulson know! I'm sorry! Coulson's gonna be so mad!"

"You thought it was a joke?! Feeding children beer is not a joke, Lance Hunter!" yelled Skye.

"I thought it would be funny to get her drunk! I'm sorry! It was a stupid joke!"

"You wanted to get her DRUNK?!" Bobbi nearly shrieked.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" screamed Skye.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! It was stupid!"

"I can't believe you would try to get Brynn drunk! You, Agent Hunter, are in huge trouble!" said May, cracking her knuckles and clenching her fists.

Bobbi grabbed him by the front of his shirt. "Don't ever let me catch you drinking beer alone with her again! Now, go and tell Coulson what you did!"

"But-but- he'll kill me!"

"Your fault! I can't believe you gave her that much beer!"

"What do you mean "that much"? It was just one sip!"

"Then what's that empty bottle doing there?"

"That's what I bloody drank!"

"A whole bottle and a half? In front of Brynn?! No wonder you gave her some. The beer got to your brain and you didn't think, you big idiot. Now go to Coulson! Why were you drinking beer anyways?"

"I was exhausted! Teaching a kid to spar can be pretty—" Hunter paused, realizing what he had just said.

"You what?" growled Skye, taking a step towards him.

"I-ah-was…"

"Spit. It. Out."

"I was teaching her how to spar." He said meekly, cowering even further into the couch.

Another torrent of words rained down upon his head, and he sat there, silently accepting it all. "Now," said May, taking a deep breath once she had finished berating him for breaking the rules, "You will go to Coulson and explain yourself to him. Now!" Hunter fell off the couch and scrambled away to the director's office.

Hunter stood in Coulson's office, looking like a dejected puppy. The whole team minus Brynn and Simmons was standing in a semi-circle around him, glaring daggers.

"From now on," said Coulson indignantly, "You are not allowed to drink beer in a room that contains only you and Brynn. You will keep all your beer in your own room, and you will not drink beer at dinner time. I will have Fitz set up a camera that will warn me any time Brynn enters the training area. I got my EYES on YOU!"

Coulson stalked out of his office, and the rest of the agents followed him. Hunter was left standing alone in the office like a wilting flower. He sighed.

"It was really just one sip."

Hunter knocked on Brynn's bunk door. She opened it, smiling happily as if nothing had happened.

"Look, Brubbles, I'm sorry I gave you beer and sparred with you."

"S'okay. Sparring was fun. I wish we could keep doing it. Anyways, the beer was no problem. And the look on their faces was totally worth it." she laughed, and then wrapped her tiny arms around his waist. "You're the bestest and funnest brother in the world."

Hunter had to swallow multiple times and will himself not to tear up. He hugged her back. Brynn was currently officially his favoritest person on the base at the moment.

"Wanna watch Frozen?" she asked.

Hunter sighed. Not again….

Hunter smiled at the memory, and twisted his bottle around in his hand.

"Lance? Still there?" asked Brynn, poking his face.

"Wah! Brynn! No, my beer can't be in the same room as you!" He jumped up, "Let me go put this in my room."

He ran out of the lounge and came back a minute later.

"There we go. No beer, and now you're safe." He said, swinging her onto his lap, "So you're bored, eh?"

"Yes," she sighed dramatically, "So bored I'm gonna die!"

"Well, then. You know what's the best cure for boredom? Naps!"

He pulled her down onto the couch and wrapped his arms around her, squishing her against his chest.

"No, Lance, no! I don't wanna take a nap! Naps are so boring!" she whined, feebly trying to hit his chest.

"No, Brubbles. Go to sleep." He ordered.

Bobbi walked into the lounge and smiled softly to herself. Hunter was lying on the couch, with his arms wrapped around Brynn, who was lying on top of him, drooling slightly into his white shirt. She shifted slightly, and draped an arm across Hunter's shoulder and snored lightly.

Bobbi took out her phone and snapped a picture. She was totally going to use this as blackmail.