Hi my Lovely's
So i decided as a gift for being away for so long. to write this short inside into Bella's Thoughts on everything that is happening, it is not long i apologize, but it was quick and small in hopes of a forgiveness gift.
this will be dark.
oh and i got a beta
His hands, his lips. oh god i'm ruined, destroyed. Oh how could anybody ever love me. Shivering she sat on the bed, tears running down her face. The heartbreaking look in her eyes. Oh how no one should ever have to go through this pain. Oh god, i can still feel him on me. Please someone, i can't, i'm so dirty so disgusting, someone please help me. With a sob The broken girl ran to the bathroom. locking the door. The world, so cruel, so dark. How could anyone do such a heartbreaking thing. There was silence, such an eerie, deadly silence. How can anybody love me, i'm no good, i'm spoiled goods. If only the world wasn't so cruel. The little broken girl. Slowly the silence was filled with the sound of water. Water, running down her skin. Her hands desperately trying to clean her. MAKE IT STOP. Oh god, so filthy, so broken. Now all that can be heard is water and heartbreaking sobs. How could anyone be so cruel. The pain, its to much. Why? WHY? The poor broken girl. The world seemed so unfaced with her pain, but at the same time so affected by her pain. The wind seemed to sigh in sadness. Oh how cruel the world is.
There is so much pain, i feel as if his touch, his hands, are imprinted onto my skin. How could anyone hurt someone like that. I'm so afraid, afraid of everything. A sound in the darkness, is enough to send me spiraling into the memories. A simple touch, is enough to make feel disgusted. How can i heal, when i'm so broken. The little broken girl, so beautiful yet so broken. Her shivering form, curled up in the huge tube. As much as i love my mates, i don't know if i will ever be able to make love to them. How could they ever make love to me. There was silence once more. in the distance, so soft but still audible. Soft footsteps sounded through the halls. Maybe now the beautiful broken girl would be saved. I never understood before, why people would hurt themselves. But i think… i think i understand now. The pain, it's the one thing i can trust, to be stable. I need stable. The air seemed to gasp. Oh why little broken girl, why would you hurt yourself like that. Everything seems to be crashing into chaos. Now the once soft footsteps run. No, no theres so much screaming, oh please little broken girl. So much loudness, worry, screaming and oh that smell. Oh sweet little broken girl. The air seemed to caress the girl. Sweet little Bella.
I originally planned this to happen in the end of chapter 3, beginning of chapter 4.
But i didn't want to put something so dark. But now i want to put it, it's my story after all. The words in Italic, there the words from air and the actions of air, there thoughts, if that makes sense. My first time writing was like that and i always loved it. The pov of the air, a higher being, affected by peoples pain. i might do similar some time but not any time soon.
Inspiration for this was a song called Edit - Ants. it was in step up 4, beautiful song to listen to while reading