James was hard working, and gave it his all no matter what it was he was doing. The company loved him because he was the best worker, he cut trees down faster that others and he needed less help moving them. He lived a simple life, a nine to five job. All was right in the world.

Natasha had retreated into herself again. She lost her best friend, and not just for now, it was forever. Why was life being cruel to me? Was it because of the red in my ledger? Was it because she hadn't done enough to right her wrongs? Was it because she had only killed and tortured all of her life? Or was it worse? Was it because she had been cruel to the one man who didn't have a cruel bone, a selfish bone, in his entire body? Was life showing her what it felt like for Steve to lose her by taking him away from her forever? All of these questions continued to rumble in her mind.

James didn't stop ever working. With every stroke, hit, and crack of the wood, all of his frustration seemed to seep out. Why couldn't he remember who he was? Why was it so hard to recall what life was like. He put together some things about himself: He had callouses, he had increased strength, duration, and appetite. He obviously did hard work, but was well conditioned, because he was groomed. Maybe he did something with the military.

Bruce was trying at every turn to comfort Natasha but it was becoming more and more difficult. He felt sorrowful for Steve's death, he was a friend but why was this killing Natasha? I am her husband for crying out loud. I hate to admit it but a small, small silver of me is happy that he's out of her life. I always felt like there was something else there and I constantly felt rage when Steve was with her. No do not judge me, she's my wife; I can be protective of her.

James just wanted to know who he was. Why was this happening to him? He knew he was lucky to have survived the fall and crash, but he rather have died than wake up with no recollection of who he was. And who was this red head woman that kept flashing though this mind? As far as he could tell he was single, no tan line from a wedding ring, and no information on him when he crashed, no one seemed to be looking for him. So who was she? Why was she flashing through his head?

Tony and Pepper felt so much grief, despite everything, all the resources that they had at their disposal, they couldn't find Steve, or definitely tell if he was dead. Tony butted heads with Steve often but they always came to a resolution of some type, there were never really hard feelings. Pepper loved Steve like a brother and none of this made any rational sense to her. If only she sent Tony after him when he left. She could have prevented this if just once she told Natasha that Steve loved her. Why didn't she say anything? All that time Steve was there for her and she broke his heart. She wanted so badly to blame Natasha for all of this and a part of her did. Another part blamed her-self, and another part blamed Thor.

Every time James hit the wood, her face flashed before him. He thought she was hot whoever she was. He just hoped that she wasn't related to him otherwise these thoughts would be sick. As he headed back into town that night he just wanted nothing more than to drown out his sorrows and these thoughts. No one pitied him and there was no room in his complicated life to pity himself.

Thor blamed himself more than anyone. He knew Lord Steven would not have probably said anything to Lady Natasha had he not been drunk because of his mead. He knew Lord Steven would probably not have driven off drunk or intoxicated if he hadn't had his mead. He had introduced Lord Steven to his mead a while back and it didn't seem to affect him much. When we returned from Asgard a while ago he brought back a small barrel for him as gift. Not once did he think anything like this could have happened. Lord Steven was dead because of him. He went to Heimdell to help gather intelligence of Lord Steven. He wanted to find Lord Steven. Heimdell said that Lord Steven couldn't be found, it only worked if the person was alive and aware of who they were, so it gave Thor the slightest hope, but he never shared this with anyone for fear of false hope.

James was drinking and trying so hard to end his troubled mind, but it seemed that no matter how much he drank he couldn't get drunk, this was something else that was different about him. He got some looks while downing all of this alcohol, but the bar tender made a lot of money that night.

Shield had tried to find him when they were informed that he was no where to be found, when they found out that Stark couldn't find him. They went through all digital records, they swept the police department and nearest hospital to the accident. Nothing was turning up. It was all because the town only kept paper records and Shield didn't think about that and it would be too hard to inconspicuously sweep through regular means. They put down missing/dead in the Rogers file for the second time in history.

The new avengers, Sam mostly toasted to his death and wept for their lost leader. Natasha was second in command and now was the leader with Sam as a second leader. They all knew the team dynamic was different and they all could sense that Natasha was very different. Sam mostly never believed that Steve was dead, but eventually he came to terms with the fact that dead or alive Steve was not returning anytime soon.

James continued to drink, and a few girls tried to flirt with him and desperately tried to get his attention. One girl had red hair like the women in his dreams and he slightly began to pay her a little bit of attention. They went home that night and James tried to woo her and tried to convince him-self that all was right with the world that this was all right. But he couldn't, he couldn't take this girl without knowing whom the red head in his mind was. What if she was his girlfriend or a fiancé, this would be cheating and he couldn't do that not to her. When he walked away from her and went to his own cabin a little ways out of town he kept thinking of the red head.

It had been a month since the crash and this time, all of the Avengers and Shield were ready to declare the Captain dead. They gathered in Arlington National Cemetery for the ceremony. He had a grave from before that had been removed and reserved for later, now was later. The Howling Commanders were next to him and Peggy was next to him. For the second time in history they put an empty coffin in the ground to recognize the fall of America's hero. As they went through person by person giving small speeches, and placing their roses on the casket everyone shed tears, even Nick and Coulson and Hill. The rifles went off and everyone walked away from the casket except Natasha. Bruce tried to get her to go but she wouldn't leave yet, and he stormed off. Pepper came behind Natasha and held her. Natasha let go of all of the tears she was holding in.

Throughout the day James felt something eating at him and he couldn't place the feeling. It was a mixture of regret, loss, and pain. Like he was supposed to be somewhere else and he couldn't figure out where. All over the news papers and radio stations people were holding moments of silence for the fall of America's hero Steven Grant Rogers. He felt bad that this guy had died, from what it sounded like he was a real good person that always sacrificed himself. Shield had hid the details of his death and information of him, but it was still confirmed that this guy had died. He had a fleeting daydream; he could see the red head women in all black crying in his dream. She was standing over a coffin and he was suddenly there with her and he wanted her to stop crying, but she couldn't hear him. James decided that it was finally time he head into the city and go to a military place and figure out if he was in the military, it would be a start to finding out who he was. The structure and the definition and callouses he had didn't come from working in an office all of his life.

Natasha made daily trips to his grave. She whispered words of sorrow and apologies. 'I'm sorry Steve that I never recognized what you felt for me.' 'I'm sorry for playing with your heart.' 'I'm sorry for telling you to leave.' 'Most of all I'm sorry for telling you and forcing you to come to my wedding.' 'I might not have known how he felt for the rest of my life, I might have had a cold Steve in my life, but I would have had my best friend still in my life.'

James walked into the therapist's office that Friday and told him what he thought. The doctor thought that I was a good step towards finding out who he was, but to not to get his hopes up. James never told his doctor about the red headed woman that flashed in and out of his mind. He figured out he was good and drawing and drew her face. He figured that even if he wasn't in the military, maybe this woman was, or she was related to someone that was, and he would be able to find her. As James prepped to go to the city he made sure he kept a neat beard and a clean hair cut, still longer and different than when he woke up from the crash.

As James drove throughout he city he had more and more flashes. Maybe he was from New York City, but the images were of an older city, which seemed weird because there was no way he looked a day over 28. He walked into the recruitment office and asked to speak to an officer.

"What can I do for you?"

"Well I had some questions about the military."

"Are you interested in signing up, because we have a lot of brochures and information on our website."

"Well that's the thing, I think I was apart of the military, but I crashed and when I woke up I had no memory of who I was. Something is telling me that maybe I was apart of the military."

"This is quite the odd request."

"But I need to know Sergeant."

"Let me see what I can do." The Sergeant returned a little later and began to fingerprint him, and take photos for an analysis. "I'm going to run this through and see what happens."

"Thank you I appreciate it." When the Sergeant came back he looked perplexed.

"Well?"

"I just…this is weird. Your fingerprints and face scan came back as someone, well someone who was just buried."

"Well as you can see I am alive alright. Who was it?"

"Well its…its uh Steven Grant Rogers."

"Sorry who?"

"Captain America."

"You are joking."

"No I'm not."

"Enough with the pranks Sargent."

"I'm being serious, here look at this."

"I can't believe it."

"Neither can I sir." James walked out of the office with the file in his hand. He couldn't believe what the Sergeant was telling him. He was…Captain America.

Back at Shield, Nick was working on some paper work before going home for the day. He was altered to something on his computer. A hit came back on someone running and matching Rogers' fingerprints and facial scan. This isn't possible? Or was it? He rushed out of the office and took a jet to New York to the office that ran the test. When he arrived he questioned the Sergeant on duty and got the full story. Steve was in fact alive and he was here in New York.

Please R&R. I would like to acknowledge MysticFantasy for giving me a lot of inspiration with this chapter. Until next time...