Authors Note: Hello all so this is that long promised and somehow really delayed chapter that I know you all have been waiting for. I hope you all find it enjoyable. I got an idea from a few other Fanfiction stories, so bear with me when I try the following…anything written in "…." this is something said in Russian. I think it makes thoughts clear and then I don't have to use Google translate only to translate exactly what I am saying to you the reader…so yeah let me know what you think about that…Please R&R. R. City - Locked Away (Lyric Video) ft. Adam Levine, is the song I wrote this chapter to you might want to read this chapter while listening to it to set the mood.

Oh and this chapter is more borderline M than T, this serves as your warning…. So yeah enjoy.

She couldn't believe the sight before her. She was shocked and all of her thoughts were uprooted. She couldn't help but let go, her trigger finger itching to let go. He held her gaze and saw her gun still pointed at him.

"Romanoff, don't, okay put it down." She looked at it him blankly before pulling the trigger three times in quick succession. The three round burst echoed through the stillness of the moment. He couldn't even react fast enough to dodge the bullets. Flinching slightly, Steve took several minutes to come back to his senses. Natasha hadn't even blinked. Looking right over his shoulder he saw the bullets embedded in his book case six inches left of his arm, one foot left of his heart. She didn't miss on purpose that much was clear. Everything was silent for only a few more minutes before he finally spoke up.

"Romanoff. Put the gun down please. Please, Natasha." The way her name came rolling off his lips had been music to her ears. She lowered it slowly and holstered it. She left and walked briskly towards Fury's office. The son of a bitch absolutely did not say anything about this he lied to my face and let me believe that Rogers was dead. She burst into his room and walked straight towards him not even taking her eyes off of him.

Steve took a moment to collect himself and his thoughts. Oh god how he missed her. It was weird that it took her voice to finally wake him up from his memory loss. She had fired at him for god sakes. Why did he love women that shot at him? She was everything to him and now that he really remembered everything he realized how much he had longed to talk to her like a real friend. The distance between them was more than palpable. He longed to hold her, look at her, and love her, and talk to her as a real lover would. He had to go after her before even their working relationship collapsed. To never talk to her or see her again would destroy him. He closed up for the night grabbing his wallet and keys and ran after her. As he got near the elevator he heard her yelling in Fury's office. He went in slowly. He made eye contact with Fury, and then he stopped dead in his tracks.

"You know I thought I found her for a while."

"That's perfect Steve, and what happened?"

"She got married to my friend."

"Please leave Steve." The memory played on a loop in his head. He couldn't approach her much less talk to her after what he had done to her. It was too late to run though. Natasha had turned around already and had spotted him there.

"I think I should just let you and Cap catch up. Romanoff, consider this your promotion to level 10, only the Cap, Coulson, and myself are this high. Even Coulson doesn't know of Cap's return though." Like that Fury walked out of his office leaving just Natasha and Steve alone.

"Start talking, because if I do it will not end well or be pretty for you."

"Okay, okay Natasha I'll explain."

"I'm waiting Rogers."

"Well where do you want me to really start Natasha?"

"How about at the beginning?" She couldn't mean when his feelings for her started could she. "The night of my wedding." He was internally choking at least he caught a small break.

"Well I drove off and I lost control. I went over a cliff. You know how the road winds down slowly? I essentially took a painful shortcut. Fell down half the mountain before I came to a stop. I wasn't conscious, but apparently someone found me called me into the hospital. I woke days later and didn't know who I was. Doc told me I made a miraculous recover and discharged me. I got a local job working and finally I gave up not knowing whom I was. I walked into a military office feeling that I was in the military. Then Fury found me in a gym working out, came to me and offered to fill in the 'gaps'. Past few months since then I've been back at Shield working getting back into my role as an associate director. It's been a year since the accident and I was working late, I still had some gaps in my memory. I heard your voice when you went into Fury's office and then I remembered, well everything. The rest you know." His ears got slightly red on the tips at his last few sentences. Natasha stood there staring at him and it was silent for a long time.

"Natasha?" she had been just staring at him. Unbeknownst to Steve all of her walls were crashing down. Everything was hitting her at once. Anger. Frustration. Pain. Suffering. Relief. Excitement. Love.

"Natasha?"

"Damn you Rogers. Damn you for making us all believe that you were dead, for making me believe that I had killed you by asking you to leave. Damn you." She had been slowly walking towards him, while giving her speech.

"Natasha, please."

"Please what Rogers? What forget about your fake death? Forget about how horrible I felt? Forget about all the grieving and lost moments that have passed in your supposed absence? Steve you made all of us, me, believe that you were dead for a whole year. It's not easy to just forget that and pretend like it didn't happen. After everything that night, after what happened and losing you, I broke, we all did in some ways but I was lost. Steve you were the glue to the team and to find you here in D.C. alive the whole time, working without telling us, it just…"

"No Natasha I am not asking you to forget your pain and I am not asking for you to instantly forgive me but I am asking for a second chance. I am asking for you to not throw away the chance to mend our working relationship."

"Is that what you really want Steve? After what happened that night, you just want to be co-workers, my boss at Shield?" Natasha looked at him and her face betrayed her showing her real emotions since their conversation started: longing, love, pain, suffering. They had gravitated towards each other to the point where an inch separated them.

"No I don't want that. I want so much more from you but I could never ask you for that, not while you are married to Bruce, not while you love someone else."

"You know Russian?"

"Yeah, I learned after I fell in love with you. Somehow I thought that one day it would help me woo you over but after everything, after Ultron and Bruce I never found the right moment."

"And if I don't love Bruce, if I love someone else?"

"I would…words could not describe what I would do to you and with you." Staring into each others eyes Natasha leaned forward desperate for body contact. To feel his heart beating beneath her light fingers, to feel his warmth envelope her, her lips brushed his and she looked up to him one last time. She leaned into him connecting their lips. The moment stilled and the whole world could be burning but it wouldn't stop them, it wouldn't ruin their moment, this moment.

"Natasha. Natasha stop, we can't, I can't. You're married and I'm bound by my morals. I can't. I wish I could, I want to so badly."

"Please Steve. Let me lose myself tonight. Let us have tonight if not ever again." Her accent making the words husky and alluring, her eyes pleading with his, and they gave in to the mutual desire and passion. He led her out of the building and she led the way to her D.C. apartment in her corvette. Hands never losing contact, the ride was immensely short, lust and need building along the way.

They fidgeted the whole way dying for contact. In the elevator hands started to wander, and when they finally tumbled into the apartment all doubts ceased to exist. They made the way to her bedroom on the second floor of the duplex. He towered over her as she sat on the edge of the bed. Lips and hot breath paved the way, determining the pace of the night. Urgency took over for the first time. Jackets came off first then shirts started coming off. The moonlight made her skin glow. Standing on their knees on her bed Steve broke off their kiss to admire her, exposed to him, vulnerable, and his in this moment. He grabbed her hand and laid it over his heart, his strong steady heart beat the only sound in moment.

"This is more than a simple hook up to me Natasha. This is everything. I may have never done this before, but I intend to please you and show you how much I love you, how much you mean to me, how you complete me." His other hand was caressing her cheek. She started crying. "Natasha? Did I do something wrong?"

"No, I've just never had someone tell me that they love me. Steve, you mean so much to me and I don't want to ruin whatever is left of our friendship, but I want you to know how much you mean to me. You're everything to me. Steve I love you. No regrets, no strings attached. I love you Steven Grant Rogers." He started kissing away her tears.

"And I love you Natalia Alianovna Romanova." That night consisted of more than just sex, it was so much more it: they made love. They tumbled through the sheets and showered each other with devotion and love. Finally in the early hours of the morning they collapsed together in each other's arms. She was curled into his chest hand laying above his beating heart. Draped across her waist, his arm pulled her possessively towards him. When she finally came to she woke up to an empty bed cold, his lips a ghosting memory over her own. It hadn't been a dream could it have been. She turned to her nightstand to see them: the white paper folded neatly, the chain with his dog tags and cross. She picked them up and held them tightly in her hand as she opened up the letter.

Dear Natasha,

Oh god you are so beautiful and I don't know how many more ways I could tell you or show you. I want you to know that I love you and last night was more than a dream for me too. I had such a hard time leaving you this morning but I know deep down in my heart somewhere it was the right choice no matter how much it broke my heart. It took every ounce of my strength to walk away. Promise me you won't kill me when you see me again. Better yet promise me you won't regret last night. I will never forget it as long as I live, even if you do.

I would have written this sooner if I didn't have to start over forty times. Seriously look in your trashcan. I would have written this is Russian if I knew how to write in Russian, unfortunately I only know how to speak it, I think it would have made this more romantic and less of a heart break or excuse. Okay, okay, now I am rambling, sorry it's the affect you have on me. What your presence does to my body and mind is unspeakable. God I love you Natasha and I don't want you to ever forget that. But right now is not our time to be together. I still hope that we haven't missed that window. I know that you will hate me for making this decision without you; I know you are strong and independent, and more than capable of taking care of yourself. It's just that writing it made it easier to say good-bye for now.

Natasha I love you and I want you to promise me that when it is really my turn to worship you to love you, as I want to you'll come back to me. I promise you that I'll never let go of the love I have for you. I will let last night replay in my mind as a reminder of the love we share. When men go off to fight they take a token of love a favor from their loved ones. I will take last nights memories as that favor; I want you to hold onto my dog tags and cross. When you're ready to be mine and only mine. When it's finally our time I want you to bring them back to me. I will come back to you after every mission; I will wait for our chance. Bring me my dog tags and cross; don't let go of what we shared last night. I love you.

Yours,

Steven Grant Rogers

How could he just leave her like that? How could he just walk away like that? She gave her self to him last night and he just left. Her life was a mess. She hoped that she would wake up to Steve, so that they could figure this out. Face the world together. America's golden boy in love with the Russian spy, the Russian spy in love with America's golden boy, but he made his choice and now I needed to figure out what I really wanted. God Steve was so righteous and she owed it to her self, to her marriage to see if there was something there worth preserving. The ultimate choice was before her: Bruce or Steve?