A/N: Hay guys! REALLY big chappie here for you...and if you dont like our story, then dont read it. I think this request will fall on deaf ears because some people put there like to waste their energy in life complaining about everything instead of appreciating and being nice. Life's too short guys.

"Can we please stop now." Nicky whined to Legolas, Gimli and Aragorn. They had reached the skirts of the forest, but still had to follow that for a few miles before they came to the site of the battle. Night was falling fast.

Legolas slowed his horse to a walk while Gimli nodded off behind him.

"Yes, we shall stop and rest here for the night." Aragorn said, dismounting Hasufel and leading him to a large leafy oak tree whose branches were ancient. They set camp beneath this tree and built a fire. It was now completely dark and they could just see their horses in the firelight. It was Gimlis' turn to watch tonight, but nothing significant had happened, considering they were on the border of an ancient forest.

Nicky was just nodding off when a noise rent the air. Their horses were neighing in terror and suddenly pulled free of their bonds. They ran, screaming and champing into the darkness.

"Our horses!" Nicky cried miserably. Aragorn was looking round and listening intently:

"Something has scared them. Something's out there."

Nicky gave a nervous glance over her shoulder. "OK, you can stop scaring me now Aragorn." She said wearily.

Just then, Gimli gave a shout. "Hi! Hey! Who are you, and what is your business here!"

They turned to face the thing he was shouting at and saw, just on the edge of the firelight, half concealed in shadow, was an old man, hooded and cloaked. He was leaning on a walking stick and wasn't moving.

Aragorn took a step towards him. "What do you want!" His hand was straying to his belt.

And as suddenly as he had appeared, the old man vanished. Nicky gasped. That was no ordinary old man. There was a shuffling in the bushes behind them and they whipped around, Aragorn drawing out his sword which gleamed menacingly in the orange light as if it was on fire.

Nothing emerged. They stood frozen for a good five minutes, listening, waiting…But the old man never returned.

Nicky was the first to speak; "Well, that was the freakiest old man I've ever seen, and I've seen some freaky old men in my time." She said.

"That was no ordinary old man." Aragorn said, placing himself on the ground.

"Yeah well, say whatever you want, but he was still freaky." Nicky replied, sitting down next to him.

"Well he's caused an awful lot of nuisance, whatever he may be." Gimli said irritably, still pacing round the camp.

"He was probably the one who chased off our horses. What a dick, doesn't he realise that we're gonna have to walk now?" Nicky said incredulously.

"I am more concerned about who he is, not what he has done to us." Said Aragorn, referring back to his old manner of using riddles a lot.

"Well, who could he be?" Nicky asked.

Aragorn was silent for a while, then spoke; "I think he was Saruman." He said

"Saruman? Are we that close to Isengard?" Nicky asked in alarm.

"We are quite close. No doubt he heard about our hunt, and has come to pay us a visit." Aragorn replied grimly.

Nicky lay back down on her blanket.

"I really hope he doesn't have Carmen, Merry and Pippin, because he's already got our horses." She said miserably.

The next day dawned bright and fair, with only a light breeze and little fluffs of cloud in the sky. Aragorn roused them fairly early and they left quickly, wanting to leave the campsite behind them for good. They found no sign of their horses. They were following the line of the forest, going slightly uphill and saw ahead of them the forest went into a kind of corner, and what lay beyond the corner was out of sight. They rounded the corner and emerged at the top of a small hill, if you could call it a hill. In the distance, the peaks of the Misty Mountains rose tall into the sky, smattered with white snow. Isengard lay amongst these mountains. The wide lands of Rohan drew to a close and ended on the banks of the River Entwash sparkling in the distance. They turned their attention back to Fangorn forest and saw with a jolt in the stomach that they had at last reached the battle site of the Orcs and the Rohirrim. There was a wide circle where the grass was trampled and burnt, smoke was rising from a great burning heap of flaming Orc bodies, their captains' head thrust onto a wooden spear and forced into the ground. All about there was a reek, which could only be described as the smell of death.

"Wo, Carmen, Merry and Pippin were in this?" Nicky asked in wonder.

"I hope not, they could have come to serious harm. Come, let us see what evidence there is on the battle field." Aragorn said.

They scrambled down the bank and strode into the heart of the battle scene. There was not much to find, as everything was destroyed, and only the trained eyes of Aragorn and Legolas were able to scour the area, looking for clues. Gimli and Nicky went to look at the Orc bodies. Nicky pinched her nose as they neared the bodies. Burnt Orc wasn't the most pleasant of smells to say the least. Gimli was poking around with his axe in the rubble when he gave a call.

"What is it Gimli?" Aragorn asked urgently.

"It's one of their Elven belts." He whispered, holding up the charred remains of a beautiful belt, with interwoven designs and beautiful gems. Nicky's hope was gone. Finally, she knew their fate. At least it was better to now know what had happened.

Nicky stared with dismay at the ground.

"We failed them." Gimli whispered.

Aragorn kicked a metal helmet a great distance and roared with frustration, then fell to his knees. Legolas was whispering a prayer in his native language. Aragorn was looking at the ground.

"A Hobbit lay here," He said, "And the other." He said, pointing.

"O wow, that helps us immensely doesn't it?" Nicky said sarcastically. Aragorn ignored her, and continued;

"They crawled, their hands were bound." He said, crawling himself a short distance as he followed what might well be the last paces of their friends. Suddenly, he stooped, and held up a piece of thick rope.

"Their bonds were cut! And look! Crumbs of the elven bread, lembas!" Aragorn said excitedly, which roused the company a fair bit. It wasn't everyday that Aragorn got excited. Aragorn now got up and started striding away, following what was evidently still the trail. He stopped.

"Their tracks lead away from the battle, and into Fangorn Forest." He said, raising his head to stare into the forever gloom of the wood.

"Fangorn." Gimli whispered in fear, "What madness drove them in there?"

Aragorn turned and faced them. "We have now two choices: To go into Fangorn Forest and search for Merry, Pippin and Carmen, or we go to Edoras." He told them.

"Wo, hold up there buddy, I ain't walking to Edoras, not without a horse. No way." Nicky said, and she folded her arms.

"I agree with the Lady Nicky." Said Legolas.

"Thanks Legolas mate, good to know someone here has brains." She said. Gimli was in conflict with himself; He was reluctant to go into the dreaded gloom of Fangorn, then again he didn't want to go walking all the way to Edoras.

He sighed, "Fangorn it is."

"I have been in Fangorn on several occasions and I believe that I could help us strike a considerable path." Aragorn said calmly.

Legolas was looking strangely happy.

"You seem mysteriously happy my friend Legolas." Gimli said.

"I have wanted to enter Fangorn for many years. Some of my kindred used to live there many ages ago." He said, and followed Aragorn into the trees.

"Well, at least one of us is happy." Nikky muttered, and followed after him.

Picking through the vegetation in Fangorn was not the easiest of tasks. They were all extremely scratched and sore, apart from Legolas alone, who seemed to be able to avoid the various branches. They hadn't been at it long when there came the sound of a stream flowing ahead of them.

"There is the River Entwash ahead of us, hopefully the Hobbits and the Lady Carmen stopped here for a while, and left their tracks for us." Aragorn said, looking back over his shoulder at us. They climbed down the bushy banks and examined the muddy bed. After many minutes of searching they did find tracks, but they weren't exactly the tracks they had been searching for.

"Orc tracks! Or I have never seen them." Aragorn said with great interest. There was no sign of the Hobbits or Carmen. "We will follow these tracks and see where this Orc went, for I believe he could have something to do with our friends," Aragorn said, and started to lead the way again. The Orc had made for further inside the forest, amongst all the tall trees, when suddenly his tracks stopped.

"Where'd he go?" Nicky asked.

"What's that?" Gimli growled, pointing into the dark at a dark shape on the ground. They approached cautiously (you can never be too careful) and slowly looked upon the shape. It turned out to be a very squashed Orc that looked as if a one thousand kg weight had just landed on him. Not very pretty.

"I'll wager he has a very bad headache right about now." Nicky said, stepping away.

"Indeed!" Gimli snorted in disgust.

"But how did he get that way? And look at all the loose dirt on the ground, and those queer markings leading away!" Aragorn said, indicating all around where they stood.

"Oh my God! Look!" Nicky squealed delightedly, and pointed to the base of a tall pine tree. There, without question, were the footprints of a person.

"The Lady Carmen was here!" Legolas said delightedly.

"Yes, and look here too, Merry and Pippin's footfalls. Though they can hardly be seen." Aragorn said, bending close to the ground to get a better look.

"How old are the prints Aragorn?" Nicky asked urgently. There was now a chance that they might find them after all.

"These marks are only just over a day old, if I am not mistaken. But Merry and Pippin's footprints are only in this one spot. Why then do the Lady Carmens' lead all the way over there?" Aragorn asked, turning towards the company. "It is as if Merry and Pippin flew off into the distance."

"Well, I say that we follow Carmens' prints, now that we've found them." Nicky said without hesitation.

"OK, we will follow the Lady Carmens' trail, though we do not know where it leads." And Aragorn, being their chief investigator led them off as he always did. But they only had to go about twenty meters. They stood at the bottom of the small hill Gandalf had found Carmen on and stared up in disbelief. Gandalf and Carmen were standing there, looking out over the trees, and debating today's weather.

I whipped around; someone had just given a cry behind me. And there they were, standing at the base of the hill and staring at Gandalf and me with utter disbelief in their faces. I grinned and said:

"'Bout time you lot turned up!"

Nicky gave a squeal and came racing up the hill towards me. She threw herself on me and I staggered as she clung there, babbling on about how she would never let me out of her sight again. When she finally let go of me she finally turned her attention to Gandalf.

"Gandalf! Wo this is too cool! Carmen and Gandalf all in one day!" She cried, and proceeded to bombard him with questions about his favourite food, colour and what his star sign was.

"You little rascal you!" Gimli was standing in front of me, looking pleased but slightly annoyed. "You led us over a thousand miles of plains, and forced us to come after you into this wretched forest!"

"Well, good exercise for you eh?" I said, trying not to laugh at the indignant look on his face. Gimli went then to save Gandalf from the tirade of Nicky.

"Aragorn! Well done mate, I knew you would find me." I said appreciatively to him, and he bowed low, with a smile on his face.

"We are glad to see you well. But may I ask, what has happened to Merry and Pippin?" He said, looking around as if they would suddenly spring out and surprise him.

"Have you heard of Treebeard?" I asked.

"Treebeard? So they have gone with him have they. I must talk to Gandalf about this matter." And he bowed again and went to speak with the old wizard. Now there was only one person left, and my heart ached to speak to him again.

"Legolas!" I ran to him and put my arms around him, burying my face into his shoulder. "I knew you would come for me." I whispered.

"Of course I came for you, I could not just abandon you." He replied, placing his arms around me in turn. Did Elves hug? I wondered. Suddenly he laughed.

"What's so funny?" I asked him.

"I'm just glad to have found you, that's all." He replied.

"And I'm glad you found me, when Merry and Pippin left, I was all on my lonesome and it was really quite stupid." I said.

"Indeed it has been quite boring without you too." He said. We both fell silent, and the silence was a little awkward, I didn't know what to say, I just stand there with Legolas's arms around my waist.

"The silence was incredibly boring." He whispered, and bent down to kiss me. Now this is better, I thought to myself, and ran my hands up his back until I found his neck. Now, I'd never read about Elves kissing anywhere, but Legolas could sure kiss. I playfully brought him to the ground and just lay there, wrapped up in his arms.

"Aaaawwww, that is sooooo cute! Anyone got popcorn?" I heard Nicky's voice and twisted around.

"And what?" I laughed.

"And you so have to get me an Elf, like you promised!" Nicky said, staring down at me pointedly.

"Yeah, yeah, when he turns up." I murmured, and turned back to Legolas, "Now, where were we?" I asked.

"Oh that's nice!" Nicky scoffed, "I risk arse and limb to save you and you go and give me cheek!"

I burst out laughing, jumped up and ran over to her, where I gave her the biggest hug.

"Thanks for rescuing me Nick." I said to her.

"Yeah well, someone had to save your ass." Nicky replied. I laughed again.

"How did I survive without you?" I asked in mock wonder.

"Meh, you did OK." She said, shrugging. I smiled. Everything was back to normal, well, as normal as it would get in Middle Earth.

"So," I said, turning to the group. "Where to next?"

The sun was low on the horizon, and we were riding along in companionable silence, when Nicky said, "I think I miss chocolate. I have a major craving right now. Oooh, and doughnuts, mmmm Pizza!" Then she sighed, "But mostly chocolate."

"Ummm chocolate? What's that?" Said Legolas.

"It's the most delicious thing ever to be made… ever! Well apart from Orlando Bloom." Nicky said, winking at me.

"I'd have to agree with you there, utterly and completely." I replied.

"Well, there is always Josh, but it's unlikely that I'll see him again for a while at least." Nicky sighed again.

"Don't worry Nick! You'll have an elf soon… I promise." I said.

"As long as it's soon." Nicky said grinning.

"What else do you miss from home?" I asked.

Nicky laughed, "Interaction with hot teenage guys… that have cars."

"Mmmm, cars…" I said. "I miss transportation."

"Well, at least we're getting fit." She said. She was right, in the month that we had been in Middle Earth our bodies had toned up and we were now fitter that ever. Also, the impossible had occurred and we were tanned… but damn did we need a mall.

Our clothes were becoming ragged and torn from over use. I was still in my trackies and singlet top that I had been wearing that fateful day when I went for a run. Although on passing I had grabbed a jacket when we had gone and raided my house for food. Nicky was in jeans, which were wearing holes in the knees, and fading all over. Her baby tee, along with my singlet were starting to get rather… dirty.

"Yeah, fit is right!" I said.

"If only I had a bikini and some guys now!" Nikki said. Then she tensed her upper arm; her biceps stood out, "Look Carmen! I have visible muscles! That's new."

"Yeah, but it's good. We needed to get fit and…muscly." I said.

"Oi, imagine what it will be like when we get home. We'll be like, instant muscly!" Nicky cried.

"Yeah, home…" I said, my mind drifting off into space.

"Don't worry, we'll get home. And not only that, when we do get back, imagine the look on Nick's face when you turn up all tanned and skinny." Nicky said with delight.

"Paching, that's over, seriously. He's now like, some random dude far, far away in the deep dark reaches of my mind." I said.

"Ooooohhhh that could hurt his feelings you know, if only he was here to hear it." Nicky replied.

"I wish he was here to hear it. Would probably save me trouble when we get home." I said.

"Well, if we do get home, then to him you would like… like him one second and then hate him the next… hehehe freaky."

"Well, he wasn't the most forthcoming guy ever, so, he'll get over it." I said casually.

"He wasn't your type anyway. I think I'm missin' the whole T.V business though." She said staring wistfully into space.

"Yeah, I miss Average Joe. That was the funniest reality T.V show ever. Mind you, we won't have missed any programs 'cause we're like, frozen in time or something eh?" I said, looking over.

"I just miss Saturday night movies, even though half the time they aren't that good. They have some hot actors in them, here there are only 5 hot actors, and three of them are little people. And the rest of the hot ones we haven't even met yet. Oh except that dude that was banished by that evil, greasy, ugly, evil, gross Wormtongue dude… yeah that dudes hot, what's his name?"

"Eomer." I replied instantly.

"Yeah him, he's definitely hot."

"You met him eh? I was with Merry and Pippin but you were with Aragorn and stuff so you should have definitely met him." I asked.

"Yes, yes I did." Nicky said dreamily.

"Lucky. Anyway, I get to meet him as well. You know, I'm also looking forward to meeting the Lady Eowyn, I mean, she's a lot like us. Tramping along with all those guys. Definitely like us."

"Yeah… maybe she can give us some clothes… I need some more clothes, and I need to wash the ones that I'm in. Maybe we could ask these boyos if we could stop for a while near a stream, to wash our clothes, and ourselves."

"That'd be good, you know, our hair is getting really long, well mine is, yours is growing too." I said.

"I know, it reaches my shoulders again." When we had begun the ahhh, journey, Nicky's hair had been really short, and now it reached her shoulders, mine reached my butt.

I reached up and lifted a lock of my hair; it was perfect, falling in waves. I growled deep in my throat, "Why is my hair perfect when no-one is here to see it?"

"Ummm, because no-one is here to see it."

"Typical. Oh well, better now than never I suppose." I said, fingering my locks.

"You know, some people could consider me a guy, my hair is shorter than the average guy in middle earth, and my face is fit to match." Nicky said.

"Here we go," I muttered, then began my usual debate with Nicky, "Nicky, you do not look like a guy, nor will you be classed as one. Seriously, you have nothing to worry about." I said.

"Paching, I've never had a … feminine figure, no curves or anything, and now I have muscles, from so much exercise, although I was … slim before, now there isn't an ounce of fat on me, I soooo could be classed as a guy."

"What do you mean you weren't feminine before? That's the biggest load of bullshit I have ever heard! Don't make me come over there and beat some sense in you. Pain! Lots of pain!"

"Paching, like you could. Anyway, I'll prove my point. OI! GIMLI!"

"What is it Lass?" He said nudged Legolas to ride closer to us.

"OK, do you reckon I look like a guy?" Nicky said raising her eyebrows.

"Yes… yes I do."
"Thank you." She said.

"Whatever," I said, "Hey Gimli, you need an eye test buddy."

"I beg your pardon," He scoffed, "I will have you know that I have the eyes of a hawk."

"Yeah, and that's how you got caught by Lady Galadriels' Elves right?" I asked with a grin.

Gimli snorted, "It was a mere lucky chance that they caught me."

"You have the eyes of a Hawk?" I said, then muttered under my breath, "A blind hawk."

Gimli chose not to hear me, he turned back to Nicky and said, "Why do you ask?"

"Because, this retarded friend of mine was trying to convince me that I'm pretty, and I would have to disagree. She's pretty right? I'm not, that's the way it works."

"Yes… yes she is." Murmured Legolas, he blushed when he realised we heard him.

"Oooooo, Legolas is in luuuuurrrrvvvvee!" Nikki said laughing.

"Excuse me, don't diss my Elf!" I said indignantly.

"You can diss mine when we find him. Although, I cant see how we can get me an elf, considering I look like a guy."

"Wear a helmet." I suggested.

"That would hide my head for sure, but then I'd look even more like a guy."

"Hey, nobody said it was foolproof." I said.

"Alright, I have an idea! If I plait my hair, then Id look less like a guy, 'cause most of the guys these days have those warrior tails."

"Yeah! That would work. But seriously, you do not look like a guy. And you do not look like you have run into a brick wall." I said seriously.

"OK, so I don't look like a guy, but I can't look any good if Gimli reckons I do."

"Are you kidding me? Gimli spends all his time in caves so I don't know why we even asked him in the first place." I joked. Gimli chose to ignore me again.

"OK, so we can ask Legolas, he has elf eyes, they are good right?" She said.

"I suppose. But you know Legolas. He thinks everything is beautiful, I mean, why else would he like me?" I said.

"Shut your face!" Nicky said.

"Everything but an Orc." Legolas said.

"Alright." Said Nicky, "Look buddy, I know I'm ugly but an Orc? I didn't think I was that bad."

Legolas looked alarmed, "I did not say that you looked like an Orc!"

"But everything is beautiful to you? 'Cept for an Orc, well I wouldn't be seen as beautiful in anyone's eyes, so therefore you said I looked like an Orc… well except for my parents, they think I'm beautiful, but they are stupid anyway." Nicky said.

Legolas looked like he was struggling to keep up with our… unique, way of thinking, "Lady Nicky, you are beautiful no matter what certain Dwarves may say." He cast an eye over Gimli.

"Look, if everybody had agreed with her, we wouldn't be having this long, drawn out argument." Gimli said, exasperated.

"Well, I'm not giving up without a fight." I said stubbornly.

"Believe what you will people, but I know I'm right." Nicky said boldly.

"Na ah." I said

"Ah huh." She replied.

"Na."

"Yah."

"Na."

"That's enough." Gandalf said wearily.

Nicky turned a raptor gaze upon Gimli; "You were lying to me? What an asshole!"

"People!" Gandalf called.

"Na." I said.

"Yah." Nicky hissed.

Gandalf sighed, "Curse these New Zealander's and their stiff necks!"

Nikki cackled evilly, "That's what you get when you agree with Carmen," then she turned back to me, "Yah huh."

"Na ah." I whispered.

Aragorn had been sitting on his horse watching the proceedings with an amused smile, "So why are you both so set on believing you are ugly?"

"Because I've looked in a mirror." Nicky muttered.

"Now I am afraid that we must cut this argument short, for there are long miles ahead of us and we need to be swifter. Time is of the essence." Gandalf said.

"So, you mean that we're not allowed to talk?" I asked in alarm.

"Well, you can try, but I doubt you will be able to ride and talk at the same time." Gandalf told me.

"Are you kidding me? We're women, we can multi task!" I said.

"Ha!" Said Nicky, "Women can do anything … unlike men, who would want to be a man, if I were one, id get a sex change, must be fun to be a trans."

"You do realise that you are surrounded by men?" Gimli said with a glint in his eye.

"Yeah, and what could you do to me? I'm invincible, muhahahahahaha!"

"The beauty of time travel my friend." I said to Gimli.

"OK, now for it. We must ride now for Edoras!" Gandalf roared. And he spurred his horse, Shadowfax, on. Shadowfax rode away really fast. How the hell are we supposed to keep up with that horse? I thought.

"Hya!" Aragorn cried to his horse, which leapt forwards like he had been hit by lightning. Legolas leant forwards and whispered in his horse's ear, the horse rushed forwards, Gimli grunted and held on for dear life.

"So," Nicky said, "I suppose we should be going, we probably won't be able to catch up with them any time soon."

And so we urged our horses into action, and they in turn leapt forwards.

We traveled for many endless miles, our arses getting progressively sorer and sorer. We stopped only once for a brief halt. I here emphasis on the word 'brief'.

"Can't we stay for a little while longer? My legs are so sore its not even funny." I groaned.

"Actually, it is rather funny." Nicky replied sneakily.

"Na ah."

"Yah huh."

"Na ah."

"OK, time to go." Gandalf hastily said.

So once again, we were traveling in the deep dark of night, almost falling off our horses 'cause we were so tired. Finally, the dawn came, and we were able to shed some of our weariness. Gandalf stopped us on top of a hill. I gasped. We were standing on the edge of a valley; the far end was enclosed with tall blue mountains, their peaks pointy and sheer. In the middle of the valley rose a great mound of rock and earth. It was too big to be called a hill, yet it was too small to be described as a mountain. We soon found out that this…Houtain (get it? Hill, Mountain…) was called Edoras. It was the main city of Rohan, with the Golden Hall perched on the peak.

"Behold Edoras!" Gandalf cried, "Legolas, tell me what you see!"

"There is a white stream that comes down from the snows," He replied, "There is also a house with a golden roof, the light of it shines brightly."

"Did you say stream?" I asked in interest.

"Yes."

"OK," Nicky said, "I'm gone! I'll meet you guys in that shiny roof place, I presume that's where you are going?"

"Surely you are going to come with us?" Aragorn asked us.

"Nah brudda, I'm getting smelly." She said, turning her horse's head towards the stream.

"I agree with Nicky, for once. We really need to wash. And I stress really. Besides, you don't want us to present ourselves to the King Theoden all muddy and…gross smelling. Trust us, you want us to bathe." I said, and followed Nicky's progress down the hill.

"Don't you worry Gandalf, we'll be just fine, at home we shower every day and here I really can't remember the last time we washed… eewww." Nicky said, urging her horse into a trot.

We headed away from the men towards the stream, full of anticipation to be well and truly clean.

The water was wonderful. Cool, but not icy, and before we bathed, we drank a little.

"Aah, that's better." I said happily.

The sun began to climb up the sky, and we took our clothes off and washed ourselves in the stream. We also washed our clothes and set them on rocks heated by the sun that were on the stream bank.

After a while of basking in the cool rush of the stream, Nicky moved towards the center where it got a bit deeper and dived under, scrubbing her head vigorously.

"I wonder what's happening up at the Golden Hall." I said to Nicky as she emerged.

"You've seen the movie, and read the book, they're just freeing whatsisname from Saruman."

"Hmm. Yeah, but, I hope everything is going to plan." I said, and sure enough, one second later, Wormtongue came bursting out of the outer gates, screaming his head off. "What the…" Nicky exclaimed.

"It's Wormtongue!" I cried.

"So everything is going to plan then." Nicky said.

"Looks like it." I said, as I watched Wormtongues' progress across the plain.

Nicky suddenly looked horror-stricken; "Holy shit. Carmen, do you realise he's running towards us?"

"Yeah, so?" I asked.

"And do you realise that we're not wearing any clothes!" She cried hurriedly.

"Oh my God, shit. Nicky, get our clothes!" I yelled.

"But they're wet! We should just hide so we can let the clothes and ourselves dry off."

"Hide where?!" I said.

She looked around, and spotted a small copse of bush. "There!" With that she leapt out of the water and grabbed her clothes, sprinting towards the bushes. I quickly followed suit, and soon we were hiding in the shadows, clutching our damp clothes to our dripping bodies.

As he came running across the plain towards the stream, and us, Nicky whispered, "Lets go beat the shit out of him! We could save many lives with the battle of Helms Deep."

"No! We can't alter the story that much! Do you have any idea how much would change if we beat up Wormtongue?" I said seriously.

Nicky sighed resignedly, "Oh yeah, that."

"Yeah, that." I said sarcastically.

After Wormtongue was long past, we emerged from the bush and lay our clothes on the rock again.

It didn't take long for our clothes to dry and we were soon riding up towards the gate. A tall guard was standing, well, guard, at the opening of the gate.

"Uh, hello there. Did Gandalf mention that two young ladies would be coming to Edoras?" I asked nervously.

"Yes he did, Are you the two Ladies?" He asked.

"Well, duh." Nicky said, trying not to laugh.

"Nicky!" I said, also trying not to laugh. Obviously this guard was all brawn and no brains.

"Please enter." He said, stepping aside.

"Thanks man." I said, giggling at his stupidity.

We rode forwards, up to the Golden Hall. Standing at the door was Legolas; his face was overcome with relief as we rode towards him.

"Your safe! What took you so long? You look much better."

"Well, we couldn't just hurry our washing, we did want to be clean you know." I said, smiling.

"Come, we must stable your horses." He said, turning towards a building that I figured were the stables.

Once the horses were settled, we made our way inside, and found our traveling companions were situated beside the King of Rohan. Gandalf was talking to him in earnest but stopped when we entered.

"Ah, King Theoden. These are the two ladies I have told you about." He said.

"Indeed? Come in." He called to us, as we were standing awkwardly at the door. As we were walking towards the King, I whispered to Nicky out of the corner of my mouth: "Oi, Nicky. Do we curtsey or bow?"

"Ummm, I have no idea actually, maybe we should establish our equality here and now, and let this King know that we are our own people." She replied.

"Huh?"

"Just bow."

Gandalf gestured at us urgently and mouthed, "Curtsy!"

Nicky raised her eyebrows at him and bowed defiantly. I grinned and followed suit. Gandalf closed his eyes and smacked his forehead. Aragorn chuckled and Gimli shook his head. Legolas just grinned.

The King looked at us with interest, and said, "So Ladies. Allow me to introduce myself, I am Theoden, King of Rohan." He watched us expectantly.

Nicky raised her eyebrows and said mildly, "Is that supposed to shock us? 'Cause I'm awfully sorry, but it doesn't."

The hall around us went silent with shock, who would speak thus to a King?

I shook my head, "Oi you retard!" I said, "Now he won't like us!"

Nicky rolled her eyes, "Sure he will, we'll just have to work harder."

I groaned inwardly. "He can have us kicked out you know."

"Don't worry, let's just see him try, I'll hold on to his leg."

I turned to Theoden; "I'm so sorry My Lord, we are awfully sorry, thank you so much for letting us stand before you."

"Hey!" Cried Nicky, "Don't pull me into this, I'm not apologizing for anything."

I punched her in the arm, "Yes," I said, "You are."

"Hey! That hurt. You better watch it, or your tan will turn black and blue."

"Just apologize!"

"Alright, alright." She turned to Theoden, "Sorry Kingy, didn't intend any offense."

"Quite alright." He replied.

Aragorn shook his head in wonder, "This is the most respectful I have ever seen them."

Nicky scowled at him, "You keep that up and you'll never see it again. In fact, for that, You'll not see it again anyway."

Gandalf shook his head too, "A brief shining moment, and then the truth is revealed."

Nicky walked over to him and clapped him on the back. "Sorry buddy, but I am who I am."

"That's what worries me." He muttered under his breath.

Nicky scowled at him, "I'll pretend I never heard that."

"So…what are we up to?" I asked, vainly trying to start a normal conversation between them.

"Well, we were just discussing you two," The King told us, "Tell me, where do you come from?"

"New Zealand. Aux. Stillwater, represent. But I doubt you've ever heard of it." I said.

"Indeed. Well, there is no denying that you are strange folk. Coming from over the Seas. How did you come to be here?"

"Hey bud, who you callin strange? We came on magical flying teapots, so if we got thirsty, we could take a drink, its quite a long trip you know." Nicky said scathingly.

"What's a teapot?" A tall woman asked from beside the King.

"Aah, you two would not have met my niece yet. This is the Lady Eowyn." King Theoden said.

"Forgive us if we don't curtsey or anything, but that's really weird for us so, let us introduce you to our way of greeting one another, in our country." I said, and turned to Nikki; "Shall we demonstrate?"

She nodded, "We shall."

We performed the secret handshake, to the amusement of some. Needless to say, some got a rather nasty glance from us.

Nikki glared at them, "And let me introduce you to how we interact with those who… displease us. You look like a baboons arse!" She roared.

"OK, folks, let me assure you that Nicky's not usually like this. It's probably just hormones or something." I said, casting an eye at Nicky.

"But, when you people diss me, then I am like this, so you guys better watch yourselves."

"Empty threats I'm sure." I said hastily.

"What's a baboon?" Somebody asked.

"It's an ugly monkey with a bald arse, a red, bald arse." Nicky replied.

"Lack of sleep." I insisted.

"Yes. You two definitely seem to be weary. Come, feast with us. Afterwards Eowyn may show you to a bed where you may rest." Theoden told us imperially.

Nicky looked at him questionably, "What else would we be doing, but to rest? Are you implying something My Lord?"

"Thankyou My Lord, for your hospitality." I said, while stamping on Nicky's foot. Legolas tried to catch my eye, but I ignored him.

Nicky however looked at him openly and grinned. He blushed. "Why, My Lord Legolas, such an innocent mind." She said cheekily.

I laughed internally. Only Nicky, only Nicky…

A/N: Hay guys, me and Nikki LOOOVE getting your reviews so keep them coming! She comes over to my house and we sit infront of my computer and giggle at what u guys write...Aaaahhh...good times... A nikki?