AN: I feel it seems like this is getting nowhere but it is.

I knew I could never help or change what happened but I could always pretend, act out different events in alternate ways. I could never stay away from puzzles or toys but for the first time I pulled out the box of finger puppets, used to act out the other case and people's movements.

That was my greatest case. The most significant of my life. These smaller versions of everyone reminded me they were gone... but L's was what caught my mind... there he was, the person I was copying. I did not want to end the way he did. Why did he reveal himself to his enemy? Maybe I was smarter than him... maybe he did not think ahead, maybe he no longer cared. Risking your life is seen as honorable, but that wouldn't mean anything to anyone being L. We would only be replaced without any thought. No one would know I died but Zac and Roger.

I put them away and started towards the closet. I told Zac I did not need to play with toys and I do not need them... I just wanted to.

I grabbed three colorful robots and turned the power on making colorful lights flash. I created a simple story where I was a hero helping people who counted on ME. Not L, not even Near, Nate River.

When it was approaching the time Zac would come in I carefully put the toys away and went to the desk to start working. A few minutes later he arrived.

"Good morning Near." He greeted, walking to the corner.

"Good morning."

"Do you have friends Zac?"

The question was something on my mind... L wasn't normal, neither was I, but Zac could be. Maybe he has social skills... and if he can care for me he can already care for himself, he could become the greatest L.

"I have friends, why do you want to know?" He frowned maybe at my questions concerning his personal life. "I assumed so." I did really, he wasn't like me. If he went outside people wouldn't stare because he looked "weird" or "different" or even "creepy" as I have been described. He always dressed in jeans and t-shirts, maybe like normal teenagers. His black hair was always groomed framing his face. I would say normal.

"Do you have a girlfriend?"

"No, yes... but why the sudden questions? Will my answers affect my chances of becoming L?"

I hadn't told him he had already been chosen because... I wanted to save it. However, I told Roger he was chosen in case I died before I could tell him myself.

"They will not affect your chances."

"Then can I ask you the same questions?"

"I do not have friends."

"Girlfriend?"

"I think you would know the answer to that. I am always alone when you come here."

"I'm not here at night... or in the early morning, who knows what happens behind your door." He laughed.

"Are you making fun of me?" I was not completely sure but sounded like joke at my expense.

"No. I was just joking, sorry."

"Such jokes are not funny."

"Sorry."

Usually I did not care about what other people said or thought... and I have been made fun of on many occasions... but this made me glum and slightly angry at Zac. Not because of what he said, because he had what I wanted. Zac was able to have friends and even a relationship while coming here while working as L.

Somehow he noticed my mood.

"You could have those things if you wanted. You just have to know more people."

"How could that happen?"

"Maybe you could go to school or get a career."

That could happen. What would I do?

"What kind of career do you think I can do well besides being L?"

He thought about it for a second.

"What do you like most about being L?"

What did I like most? "The results."

"The results of what?"

"The results of the case being solved."

"Do you care about the people involved?"

"No."

"Maybe you'll like science. Scientist work with results."

That could work.

"Talk to Roger about it tomorrow. I'm sure he can help you."

Maybe he could. I would talk to him.