Chapter 1: JUST A BODY
Brian Swan this, Brian Swan that. Is that all Jackie can think about?
What's so great about him?
Seems to me he has made his pick. Why run around crushing after him when the boy obviously is a pathetic self destructive little whiner, who crazily enough has chosen that stuck up rich leech Edwina Cullen - the reason for why my life is fucked up - over Jackie.
Why a normal healthy male would choose a corpse over the warm, soft and very inviting flesh of Jackie Black one can never understand.
Did I say normal? Did I say healthy?
Brian being evidently a fool is something I have often thought phased, but do you think any of the girls listens to me? Of course not! Samantha actually has threatened to alpha command me if I don't stop thinking ill of poor little Brian.
Poor little Brian who goes cliff jumping in a storm so Jackie has to save him. Poor little Brian who crashes with his dirt bike because he can't make a simple turn, again Jackie having to carry (yes CARRY! Have you ever heard of a girl having to carry a male to the hospital?! Of course not, because that should never happen. And it wasn't like Brian was unconscious or anything either..). Poor little Brian who can't walk down to the beach without falling flat on his face, again having to be led by Jackie so he can safely sit down by the bonfire.
"Try to be a little nicer Lee, it wouldn't hurt you know..."
"Fuck you Samantha! Wait I already did that!"
"Now, that's very immature of you Lee. Stop acting like a little boy and grow up already. Just because I have found someone better doesn't mean that you have to act like an immature baby I'm just saying that if you can't think anything nice of Brian then don't think of him at all. Nobody wants your opinion on the topic of Jackie's love life. I think seven females know how to handle and analyze it correctly without your input."
I phase out because I honestly do not want to hear anymore only to find myself yet again in the middle of the forest without any clothes since I, unlike the girls, hadn't had time to undress and tie my shorts to my ankle, before my anger led me to accidentally phasing.
According to Samantha it's my high level of testosterone that makes me so prone to accidental phasing. Believe me I have heard her very long and tiering, not to mention aggravating, line of reasoning of why males naturally don't make good shape shifters since they apparently can't control their tempers and hence phasing anywhere near as well as females. Thus making males unfit for being wolves, and then YET AGAIN she started speculating over how it at all was possible that I had turned into a wolf when I so clearly was totally unsuitable.
The only luck I seemed to have today was that I had managed to phase out before Brian, Brian, Brian, he is so cute when he trips and falls, he is so nice when he cooks for me, isn't he dreamy? started to shuffle on repeat in my head.
Fuming I start to walk back towards my house and then girls voices carry out to my ears from a clearing just ahead of me, and for some reason - don't ask me why - I stop and listen.
Well I do know why I stop. Let me make a confession, hearing my name and Jackie's voice, that is a very good reason to stop and listen. She has a great voice you know, not shrill and high pitched like most girls but a low alto that's a little hoarse. Very sexy if you ask me.
"Lee has such a hot body. " That's Quillie. Turning into a wolf has done wonders on my body, and I was in good shape prior the shift too. I hope Jackie likes it, because I sure as hell like her body. Although I honestly don't care what her body looks like, since I like her personality the most.
"Yeah, but he acts like a jerk all the time. Brian never acts like that. He doesn't get temper tantrums and he talks about his feelings." Jackie says.
Say what?! I'm a jerk?! Since when? I've never been a jerk to Jackie. Sure I tease her a bit, just like I've always done, but that's what you do with your friends little sister. Besides she always loved me teasing her, didn't she?
And what is this crap about Brian talking about his feelings? Tell me, is it talking about your feelings to whine about how you are broken and need to be fixed, and then when you feel better you ditch that person who helped you only to go back to the one who broke you in the first place?
How the hell can she prefer Brian's suicidal self over me? Brian's like a fucking drug addict, always needing a fix. His number one drug seems to be the bloodsucker, but when that supply ran dry he started on some Jackie-make-me-feel-better drug. I've heard him talk about how he needs Jackie in his life through her memories, how he just don't leave her alone although he already has gone back to the leech. I don't get how she fails to see that he is just using her, that him needing her is selfish. He takes and takes and takes, not once has he given Jackie anything. Why can't she see that she is his back-up girl? And how the hell can he think he can use Jackie as a back-up girl?!
Jackie does not deserve to be treated like that! No girl does! She deserves to be in the center of attention, instead of pushed aside into some dusty corner. If she was mine I would treat her like a queen!
I hate Brian Swan, God I wish he was turned into a vampire soon and tried to sink his teeth in the flesh of a human, then I would have a reason to rip that idiot to pieces! Now I can't do anything because for some idiotic reason we are to protect Brian Swan from vicious revengeful vampires.
"I bet Lee doesn't even have feelings, he is all body." Quillie continues interrupting my inner hating of Brian Swan.
I feel a shiver running up my spine at her words and have to take deep breaths to steady myself. I don't have feelings?! What the fuck is wrong with these girls? Am I just a piece of meat to them?! If I don't have feelings what the hell is it that hurts hearing this?!
"But what a body! He looks yummy!" Quillie carries on sounding excited. "I would let him be my first, I mean, I would if we all didn't know what a man-whore he is, he's like fucked half the pack..."
Wait?! WHAT? Half – half the pack?! To my knowledge two people out of eight doesn't equal 50%, but I guess math isn't Quillie forte. Besides I only have had sex with said two people my entire miserable 19 year life, which in no way can qualify me for the title of man-whore!
Or am I a man-whore by association since I unfortunately fucked Pauline, a girl who takes great pride in the fact that she has been with more than half the rez and neighboring towns too? God, don't I regret ever touching her...
"Lee is such a guy, only in it for the sex! Brian, on the other hand, told me he wants to wait for his wedding night before he has sex. Isn't that romantic? I hope that night is with me!" I hear Jackie saying.
H..how can she think of me like this? How can she want Brian to be her first?
The disturbing image of Brian touching her like that makes me shake uncontrollably.
Just when I'm about to explode, I hear Embrie's soft whisper. That's enough to at least temporarily calm me somewhat. I don't want to scare my little kitten-girl by exploding in to an angry viciously snarling wolf – not that it would scare any of the others, hell it probably wouldn't scare Embrie either come to think of it.
"Lee isn't like that. He was very sweet on the date, he didn't try anything and he was a gentleman all the time."
"Awe, look who has herself a little crush. How cute..." Pauline, ever the sarcastic bitch, joins in laughing evilly at my little kitten, probably making poor Embrie blush and feel ridiculed. "You know, go out with him again Embrie. He does this amazing thing with his tongue! You should try that, in fact I think I will ask him to tongue-fuck me after the next pack meeting, you could ask him too. I bet he's up for it."
That's it! I explode.
I'm not a fucking cheap prostitute, here to please them whenever they want it.
God dammit! Since they are girls I can't even go after them and make them take their words back.
"Aw lil Lee, not in a good mood? Don't worry baby, I know how to make you feel better..." Fucking Pauline, why the hell did she have to phase too? I swear her sole mission in life must be to torment me. Can't they all just leave me the fuck alone?!
I let her catch a nice little fantasy of how I'll sink my teeth into her neck and make her take back her words once and for all.
"I like it rough Lee, you can dominate me anytime. I kind of would like to try sex as a wolf. I bet it's hot! Just say the word Lee, I'm all yours."
I think I just might puke in my mouth as Pauline starts to replay some sick twisted fantasy of hers involving me going at it as wolves. God dammit! I do not need this. I don't ever ever want to touch Pauline again and I don't want to see what goes on in that sick twisted mind of hers, especially not if it involves me.
I swear to God girls are just evil vicious creatures, masters of fucked up mind games that no man has ever learned to play.
Did I say girls? I mean bitches. Let's face it. They are nothing but a bunch of bitches.
"Lee, don't you know that female wolves are technically bitches?" Pauline just doesn't know how to stop. "I'm a bitch and I'm proud! But you my friend, you're our little boy toy, aren't you?"
"Knock it off both of you." That's an alpha command for you. Go figures Samantha tells us BOTH to shut it, but don't reprimand Pauline or any of the girls for sexually harassing me.
Girls are always siding with each other!
Bet they would tear up heaven and earth if it was the other way around, and they were the only girls in a pack of males.
I'm sure if we lived in an alternative universe with reversed roles, and there was only one female werewolf, she would be treated like a Goddess, because boys have learned from an early age that girls should be treated like princesses, whereas girls apparently have learned that guys should be treated like crap all the time. Us men are clearly much fairer and juster than girls, because I just know that if it was the other way around, a pack of males would treat the odd man (woman, whatever) out much better than these hyenas I'm forced to run with.
Did I say that my life sucks. It sucks!
AN: Poor Lee, things will get much worse for him too...