Carly sat on her bed, running her fingertips over the little silver rattle she had kept hidden in her jewelry box for so many years. A tear ran down her cheek as she traced the engraving: "For my baby. I'm sorry. Love, Mommy."

FLASHBACK

"What's wrong, Carly?" Freddie asked as he followed her out of the studio. "We're in the middle of a show! What's the matter?"

"Nothing!" she shouted.

"Carly!" he called after her. "Talk to me, please! I can't stand this."

Finally, she stopped halfway down the stairs and turned to him. "What do you want me to say?"

"Something," he pleaded. "Anything. I just can't keep doing this with you."

"Doing what?"

"You know what. You're my best friend, and you hardly speak to me anymore. Aside from the show, you won't have anything to do with me. It's killing me. What's wrong?"

She gave him a you've-got-to-be-kidding look and said, "Nothing!"

"For heaven's sake, don't lie to me!" he said angrily. "Look, I know things have been awkward since…, but that was three months ago. Why are you acting this way?"

When she didn't answer him, he tried a new approach. "I love you, and I thought you loved me. You said you still wanted me. We can make this work. We can have something great. We can start over. Take it slow. We don't have to do that again until we're ready. I'll wait as long as it takes. I love you so much, Carly! Please, just tell me what to do."

"Leave me alone!" she cried, and turned away from him.

He reached out to take her hand, and she jerked her arm away violently, sending herself tumbling down the stairs. "Carly!" he screamed.

Carly came to rest on the landing, curling up in the fetal position. The pain in her lower abdomen was crippling. She screamed in agony.

Spencer leaped over the back of the couch, tripping and landing on his face on the floor. "Oh my God, Carls!" he grunted, scrambling to her side. "Are you okay?"

Freddie reached her at the same time. "Carly!" He timidly placed a hand on her shoulder. "Carly, baby, talk to me!"

"M-might…need…a doctor," she panted as fiery knives pierced her abdomen, sending burning jolts of pain throughout her body. She screwed her eyes shut and felt tears leaking out through her lashes.

"On it," Freddie said as he pulled his phone out.

"S-spencer," Carly whimpered, "help me up." Spencer helped her to a sitting position and knelt in front of her.

Sam came rushing down the stairs and grabbed Freddie by the collar. "What did you do to her, nub?" she demanded, slamming him against the railing. Her eyes were murderous.

"Nothing," he shouted, leaning backward over the rail where she had him pinned. "She fell. It was an accident."

"An accident you caused," Sam hissed.

"Sam," Carly said through gritted teeth, "it wasn't his fault. Please don't fight. Not now."

"If you say so, Carls," Sam said, reluctantly letting Freddie go.

In just minutes, the paramedics arrived. Spencer helped Carly to her feet and half-carried her down the remaining steps.

"Oh my God, Carly," Freddie's voice was low and fearful. He was staring at the landing.

She followed his gaze to the place where she had been sitting. There was blood—so much blood. "I-I…," she stammered. Then everything faded to black.

END FLASHBACK

"Carly?" Freddie's unexpected voice made Carly jump. She looked up to see him standing in the doorway of her bedroom. He was still wearing his tux, but his bowtie was untied, and his top two buttons were undone. He held the jacket in one hand. The hair at his temples and forehead dripped with sweat, telling her he had been out in the summer heat for a while. She blinked at him, not quite sure if he was real. "Can I come in?" he asked.

She nodded once, and he hesitantly approached. He sat beside her on the bed, his eyes on the rattle in her hands. "Whatcha got there?"

She saw no reason to hide it from him. She placed it in his hand. "I bought it for…after I.…" Her words trailed off as she searched his face.

He studied the tiny bauble he held. "You…? All this time, I thought you never wanted…. I mean, you acted so sad and angry before you fell. Then afterward, you seemed so…relieved—like a ton of bricks fell off your shoulders."

"I was relieved," she admitted reluctantly. "Does that make me a bad person?" He didn't answer. "I couldn't help it. When I found out I was…I didn't know what I was going to do."

"I wish you had told me. Do you know what it was like for me to find out the way I did?"

"I'm sorry, Freddie," she whispered. "I should've told you, but I was too scared. I was fifteen. I wasn't ready for that." She wept quietly beside him.

"When the doctor came out and told us you'd be okay, I was so relieved," Freddie said, not looking at her. "Then he said you had miscarried. He said it so matter-of-factly, like he assumed we knew you were pregnant. I felt like someone kicked me in the gut. I couldn't breathe, and my ears were ringing. I heard the doctor saying, 'She lost the baby, but she'll recover.' His voice sounded like a recording being slowed down. All I could think was, 'Why? How could Carly have carried my baby for three months without telling me?' Then afterward, you acted like your prayers had been answered, and you avoided me like the plague." He finally met her eyes. "It was like you were twisting that knife you plunged into my heart after we…."

"After the miscarriage, I felt like I had a second chance—like my life had been handed back to me. I was grateful, Freddie. I was grateful that our baby died!" She was racked with sobs. He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her to his chest, letting her tears soak his shirt. When she regained control, she looked up at him. Her voice was barely audible. "Then I started to feel so guilty. What kind of person was I? It wasn't your fault, but every time I looked at you, all I could see was my own shame. I couldn't face it, or you, so I pushed you away. I never stopped loving you, though." She wiped her eyes. "I'm so sorry, Freddie, for everything."

"If you hadn't miscarried, would you have kept it?" he asked.

"I honestly don't know," she said, staring at her hands.

Freddie just nodded as he processed her answer. "I can't believe Spencer didn't hate me," he finally said. "I mean, things were weird for a while, and he was slow to warm back up to me, but I would've thought he'd despise me."

"We had a long talk about it at the hospital," Carly answered. "I told him it wasn't your fault. I told him it was my decision to sleep with you. I also told him that you hadn't done anything to hurt me and that you loved me and would've been by my side the whole time had I let you."

"So when did you buy this?" he asked, looking down at the silver rattle in his hand.

"Later on," Carly replied. "She would've been about a year old. I saw it in a shop one day and had to have it. You should've seen the clerk's face when I told him what engraving I wanted. You're the only person who's ever seen it."

"She would've been…?"

"Yeah," Carly said wistfully, "I've kind of created a mental picture of what our baby would be like—a girl. She'd have my eyes and your smile."

Freddie smiled a bit. "Sounds like what I picture when I think about it."

"She'd be five now. She'd be starting school. She'd be as smart as you."

"And as talented and beautiful as you."

"She'd be perfect," Carly said with a sad smile.

Freddie was gripping the rattle so tight his skin was turning white between the knuckles. He stood and crossed to the window, squinting in the sunlight. He pressed his forehead to the cool glass. "You know," he sighed, "for the longest, I blamed myself. I thought it was my fault you fell—my fault we lost our baby. If I hadn't been following you, if I hadn't reached out to touch you…."

"It wasn't your fault, Freddie."

"I know that now," he said softly. "Wendy helped me see that."

"She's good for you, isn't she?"

He couldn't help but smile. "Yeah, she has been."

"So why are you here? Shouldn't you be dancing with her at your reception?"

"We didn't get married." He heard her gasp behind him. "She called it off."

"I want to say I'm sorry," Carly murmured, coming to stand behind him, "but the truth is, I'm too selfish. Are you okay, though?"

"That's the thing," he said, turning to face her. "Now that the shock has worn off, I'm fine with it. It's like I love her, but I'm not sure I'm in love with her. She said some things that made me think, and now…."

Hope glimmered in Carly's eyes as he went on. "She saved me from myself after I lost you. I've been with her all this time because she made me feel good. She was the only reason I was able to stay friends with you and Sam for as long as I did. But then Griffin came back, and you…, and I…. Anyway, she kept me from hurting, and I thought I was over you. Now I wonder if she was more like a bandage than a cure. She kept my heart from bleeding, but the wound never healed."

Carly reached out for him, but he stopped her. "I'm not saying I'm ready to run back into your arms, Carly," he said. "You really hurt me. We can't just pick up where we left off like nothing happened. I don't know if we'll ever get back to where we were. And then there's Wendy. There's a chance I might actually love her. I just don't know."

"I understand," Carly said, her breath hitching. "Please just give me a chance to love you the way I should have all along." She placed her hand on his cheek. "Give yourself the chance to love me again," she said as she pulled him down and met his lips.

Freddie wanted to resist. He wanted to stay cool and aloof and not melt into her, but he couldn't help himself. He groaned into her mouth. He returned her kiss, reluctantly at first, then with abandon. Kissing Carly felt right. It felt like coming home.

He broke the kiss and gazed deeply into her eyes. They were brimming with tears, and he felt wetness on his own cheeks as well. He pressed the rattle into her hand and wrapped his own around it. With his free hand, he lifted her chin so that she couldn't look away from him. "I can't promise you forever, Carly," he said, "but I will give us a chance at it."

"That's good enough," she said with a wobbly smile, "for now." Then she kissed him again.

TWO YEARS LATER…

Freddie took the ring his best man held out to him. The flashing lights on Spencer's tie made him chuckle. He slid the ring onto his bride's finger and said his vows to her, his heart bursting with joy.

Moments later, Freddie pulled back from the kiss and gazed at his new wife. He had never seen anything so beautiful. He wrapped his arms around her and squeezed.

"I love you so much, Freddie," she whispered in his ear. "I'm so glad you came back to me."

"I love you, too, Carly," he whispered back. "Forever."

AN: That's all, Folks! I hope you liked it. I wanted this to be an emotionally tumultuous story, and I hope that came through in the writing. It was kind of hard to pack all those feelings into three chapters and no more than 5,000 words! Reviews? Pretty please?