Author's note: Hey that was quick :o). Have fun reading the next chapter! And thanks again for all those lovely reviews.

Hugs and kisses for Luso!

Chapter 11

"Hey. " He encircled her with both his arms in his one-of-a-kind Jack O'Neill hugs, kind of way, pulling her close into his embrace and finding comfort in the warmth of his body as he buried his head in the crook of her neck and cradled her head against his shoulder stroking her silky hair. "Don't cry, Sam. It's true I was hurt, I missed you every day but I'm so relieved you're here now. Shhh…we're together now, and that's all that matters, lets not dwell." He smiled at that comment, trying to lighten the mood. Although she couldn't seem to stop, tears flew freely when she thought about how much she'd hurt him.

"Come on, let's go downstairs, the coffee will be ready." Jack suggested, gently pulling out of the secure embrace after Sam had calmed down. She felt his hand on the small of her back and let herself be guided out of the room. "Night, little one. Sweet dreams." Jack said before they left the sleeping child, the door slightly ajar.

Sam's body still shook slightly as she sobbed softly, when they finally sat down on the couch. Although the coffee was done they settled for red wine and made themselves comfortable.

"Look, Sam. I know it's hard but you need to let go of the past, it will drive you crazy if you don't forgive yourself. It'll take you and me some time to adjust but I want you and Charlotte to be with me. I want you to stay." Jack stated seriously looking deep into her teary eyes, for some sort of reaction to the revelation. She couldn't believe him; didn't he hate her? "Why do you want me to stay? I hurt you so bad and you still want to see me? I don't deserve you."

"Listen Sam, I'll tell you again. Yes I was hurt, maybe still am that you left me. I didn't understand why. And it got even worse when I learned that you had married Pete, but you're here now and that's all that matters to me. I just wish you'd told me."

He knew he shouldn't make her feel guiltier than she already did, but he couldn't help it.

"It would have spared you the pain of the past two years, but there's one more thing I'd like to know. You already told me that it wasn't the first time he hit you. Tell me, Sam. Why didn't you leave earlier? Why now and not two years ago?" He looked at her but Sam's eyes drifted anywhere but his intense gaze. Jack didn't want to push her but he needed to know. He put his finger under her chin and lifted her head so he could look her in the eyes.

"Look at me, Sam." It hurt him to see her suffer so much; she was clearly fighting an internal battle with herself about what to tell him. "Sam?" he asked, still gently but a little more demanding. She took a sip of her wine and sighed deeply before starting; "You know; I thought it was best to leave. The weekend we'd spent here…" she motioned to the room around them "… it was so perfect but at the same time it showed me what we'd never have. When I learned I was pregnant I was scared at first; what would I tell you, what would they do to us if they found out?" She took another sip of her wine. "I thought marrying Pete was the right thing to do. With him I could have the life we'd never be able to live… I'm sure he knew I didn't love him as much as he loved me, but when I told him I was pregnant he was happy and it didn't occur to him that the baby wasn't his. So I decided to give it a try. I thought I might learn to love him the way he deserved to be loved in return." There was a long pause before she began again. "When he hit me the first time we'd been arguing about me going back to work. I'd lots of offers to choose from and I wanted to work but he didn't want me to. Both of us were in rage and when he hit me I was so shocked I couldn't do anything."

"But why didn't you leave him, Sam? Why did you let it happen again and again?" Jack asked. He needed to know why she hadn't come to him sooner, why she hadn't stuck up for herself and kept some semblance of the life she had before she met Pete. He knew Sam and she would always be independent and strong, why had she stayed with that control freak?

"Do you know what it feels like when everybody expects you to do the right thing? What it feels like when you're not allowed to fail?" she sighed deeply, before continuing with her explanation once again. "I made my decision when I married Pete, and by the time I realised it was the wrong one, it was too late. Everybody expected us to live happily ever after, and I didn't want to disappoint anyone. You should've seen Mark's face when I told him about the baby, he was so happy that I had finally found the man of my life, that I'd quit the Air Force and that I was going to be a mom".

She inwardly cringed; she had played that life and pretended all these years, when all along she wanted Jack. She hated the fact that she didn't risk everything for the true love of her life, when she had quit the air force for Pete anyway. "I disappointed him so much, I wanted him to be happy and do it right, and he wanted the same for me. I didn't want him to know I had failed, and I certainly didn't want anybody else to know that Sam Carter had royally screwed up." She sobbed again. "I felt so small. Aaargh…I don't know. There I was Samantha Carter… or Shannahan if you will, able to solve the greatest problems in the field of Theoretical Astrophysics, I blew up a Sun for-crying-out-loud, and I couldn't find a solution to clear up the complete mess my life was." She paused, taking a long cleansing breath before she continued with her explanation.

"I couldn't find a solution to be with the man I loved, still love, and the person I failed and hurt more than anyone. I thought about what people might think. A woman leaving her husband the first time they encountered rough times in their marriage. My heart was never truly in it, I tried at first, and it worked for a while, but then Charlotte was born and it all went wrong, he changed. I guess in a way I wasn't really willing to try and make it work, I never once stopped wishing he was you, I love you so much, I always have, and seeing Charlotte everyday made it harder and easier at the same time. I wasn't willing to risk your career, although now I look at what has happened, that seems pretty stupid. She is so much like you Jack, it's incredible, I always half expected her first words to be 'to Oz'. You two are the best things that have ever happened to me, and you are the one that gave me her, but all I did was hurt you both by not letting you know each other." Sam's voice cracked and the tears came back full force.

"He hit you, Sam. You did the right thing by leaving him." Jack assured her and gently pulled her towards him until she leaned against his strong body with her head resting on his shoulder, he would be there for them always. "You are beautiful Sam, no one should ever have treated you like that." He whispered into her hair and kissed the top of her head.

"Oh Jack. How can you forgive me, after what I have done? I kept your own daughter a secret from you" Sam was stunned that he could forgive her for the pain she had caused him, with all the stupid decisions she had made without even talking to him.

"I have forgiven you, my Sam, I would forgive you for anything, I love you too much, I always have and I always will. All that matters now is that I have you and Charlotte and I am never letting you go, it would kill me to lose you again." He stated looking into her glistening blue eyes, while he lowered his head down to hers. She shivered slightly; anticipation, emotions, self-doubts; everything was swirling through her mind until their lips finally met, it started off gently, teasing each other as their lips brushed against each other, almost hesitant to be allowing these emotions to take control after so long and so much. But they couldn't resist how they felt, their emotions took over and their lips met and Sam moved her hand to gently frame his face and pull him closer wanting him to mark her as his, She would never let him go. The kiss continued and Jack's tongue softly traced her lower lip asking for access, which she gladly granted and they moaned in unison as his tongue slid past her lips and stroked her own tongue, she had wanted this for so long and she was never going to lose him again. Their tongues duelled for long moments, until that pesky little necessity of air became an issue. As the kiss calmed down they continued to stroke noses and brush their lips against each other as their eyes locked and shone brighter than either one of them had ever seen, they finally had what they had always wanted and longed for, for ten years. They had a life. Together.

Author's note2: I guess you'll have to wait for the next update since I'm struggling to put the 12th chapter together. Love!