Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters, though I wish I owned Edward!
He sniffed at the breeze that blew threads of my hair in his direction. "Mouthwatering," he repeated, inhaling deeply.
I tensed for the spring that came swiftly and surely. The burning venom entered my bloodstream at a lightening fast pace, sped up by my pounding heart. all my muscles contracted as if I'd been given an electric shock, my hands gripped onto Laurent's arms with a strength that would have a human howl with pain. I knew the end was coming, I didn't care how much it hurt now, it would only last for a few moments. Over Edward's furious roar in my head, what was sure to be my last thought flooded my head, Edward I love you, Edward I love you.
Suddenly Laurent's teeth left my neck as his head whipped around to the left. I collapsed unable to stand upright and bear the pain at the same time. I curled up into a ball and tried to remain quiet, I bit my lip so hard it bled.
"I don't believe it" he said so low that I barely heard it.
My world was rapidly becoming devoid of anything but pain but I saw Laurent run away, I no longer cared why but I got the answer anyway as five humongous wolves raced after him, the russet brown wolf pausing to look at me for a brief second before deciding that it would rather hunt Laurent than me.
I was alone, but only physically, in my mind the most beautiful voice in the world was sobbing. I let the agony take me, I had no more energy left to take in my surroundings, I was burning and that was all I knew. Why oh why could I not just die? The burning had already surpassed anything I had ever felt before, including in the ballet studio. It was like I had always been burning and that I would always burn, an eternity of burning, yes dying would be quite welcome.
I must have been writhing and thrashing but I didn't care, there was no one around to hear me. I was completely consumed with hot burning fire, by all rights I should have been a pile of ashes now.
Some time later I began to notice my surroundings again, at first I thought I was just becoming used to the pain, but then I realised I still felt each blistering tongue of flame too keenly. I found I could feel the fire with the same intensity I had before along with the massive, festering hole in my chest and the cold wet grass under my hands and the rough bark of the tree next to me. I found I could think around all of this, see some light at the end of the tunnel and my thrashing stilled momentarily.
I thought of Charlie, the thought sprinting into the new-found space at the front of my mind, alarm bells ringing and demanding my immediate attention. I was filled with despair as I realised I could never see him again, or Renee... But the thought wouldn't shut up, I realised that Charlie would have got home from fishing and I would be missing. He would probably send out a search party again, I knew it would take them a while to work themselves out this far. But Charlie would be really worried now.
The pain started to recede from my fingers and toes, which should be a relief, but the rate at which the pain was going made me impatient and frustrated. As the pain receded more I realised that it was retreating to my heart, a heart that was now pumping the fire at a tremendous pace.
How could the pain keep escalating? It was like the hole in my chest was slowly draining the fire out of my body concentrating it in my imaginary heart; and my throat. I was suddenly so thirsty... I wondered what more I would have to endure.
I had no more control over my muscles, my face was screwed up, my feet were kicking wildly and my hands were clawing at the wet ground. I flung one of my hands above my head and I was vaguely aware that there was a massive gash in the trunk of the tree next to me.
My heart sped up again; how? But I could hear it, each beat merging into the next so that it was more like a whirring than a beating noise.
The fire in my heart blazed hotter than ever as if determined to burn forever but could only do that by getting hotter. My heart was pounding towards its last beat and the fire, seeming to know the end was near (it had to be near right?) redoubled its effort to stay alight. I finally felt, and heard, my heart falter, it tripped over the finish line and lay face down on the track.
I could only hear the raindrops falling thick and fast... and warm. Oh, that's right, I was a vampire now, everything would feel warm to me... even Edward's skin. Pain! The thought just slipped out with out my permission to rub fresh salt into the hole in my chest. I curled up into a ball again and drew ragged breaths through my teeth. I only just realised that when my heart stopped, my breathing stopped too, it was no longer essential to my survival, no longer an unconscious, reflex action.
This pain was as bad as the burning. I waited for it to subside, and it did start to ebb... and then stopped, my new mind was able to be fully aware of the loss and the rejection at the same time as concentrating on other things.
I didn't want to love him any more - correction - I shouldn't want to love him any more. I didn't want cry over my loss everyday, get stung by the rejection, ripped apart by longing... in theory it made sense to want to stop loving him, and while I was still human I had a chance of moving on. I could change, mature, grow... but I was a vampire now I couldn't grow or change, I would love him for eternity. But the truth was that loving him, while he still loved me, was the most wonderful thing I had ever known, the most magnificent experience I had had in my life. Despair thrust its talons into me again and I curled tighter into a ball.
I waited for the pain return to a manageable level, knowing that I would never truly be free of it, then uncurled and lay on my back and opened my eyes for the first time in my new life.
Everything was so clear. A million raindrops, a million small, perfect spheres falling, and I could see it all with such clarity. I lay there in wonder at the sight, also noticing how I didn't find the rain so unpleasant any more. I let my mind wonder, not too far though, there were a few forbidden subjects that it wasn't allowed to bring up so I mainly concentrated on my senses. I could hear the patter of each distinct raindrop, the swishing of the leaves in the wind... the voices... the voices? There shouldn't be any voices.
My previous thought came back to haunt me: Charlie would have got home from fishing and I would be missing. He would probably send out a search party again. That must be the search party! Panic, pure raw panic. I wasn't ready for this! I was a newborn, and a thirsty one at that I realised as the scent of human reached me. They were getting closer, there was no more time to think, I had to act now!
"Bella!" they called
I jumped up into the branches of a nearby tree and climbed to near the top. I should've expected the climb to be swift and smooth, not one trip or stumble, but it still shocked me how sure my grip was and how... easy it was. I had gone from the ground to ten feet up the tree in a second. I came to rest agilely in a spot that was densely packed with leaves without rustling the branches at all.
The two voices I heard were coming through the tree line on the opposite side of the clearing about eight feet apart. They were two Quileute boys, I recognised them as Sam and Embry.
"I swear this was the place" Embry was saying.
"Well she's not here now" replied Sam.
"I could have sworn..." he sighed "She was stood over there" Embry said pointing just to the left of my tree, "and the blood sucker was talking to her and he was gonna bite her, and Jake was desperate to just go and kill the blood sucker... by the way, how is Jake?"
"Well they said his ribcage was crushed and his left arm was broken, and its been about three days so far, so he should be up and about in a few more days."
His words were making no sense, and what had happened to Jake?
"Poor guy, counting on the blood sucker to be distracted when he pounced, its all my fault, I didn't see the log and I... I just tripped" -
Sam cut him off - "no-one's blaming you, the blood sucker got in a lucky swipe that's all"
"yeah, you're right"
"Maybe Bella ran off after we chased the blood sucker away"
"Why couldn't we come here first? it would have probably be easier to find her then"
"You know why, we have an alibi for all of Saturday, we cant blow our cover now, I want to find Bella just as much as you but you know why we cant tell, we just had to do it Charlie's way, but now we've found her truck we can keep looking around here."
They had just reached the edge of the clearing where Embry had pointed to earlier, "ugh! this place still reeks of leech!"
They chuckled to themselves as I gripped onto the branches of the tree almost snapping them. I had been holding my breath but I could still hear their hearts beating, faster than usual, maybe it was the exertion. The wet, juicy sound of their pulse was ringing in my ears, all I had to do was... No. I couldn't do this, I needed help. I needed some other vegetarian vampires, I needed the Cullens.
It was just an intensification of the pain I already felt, but it still had me gasping for air. Air that didn't smell like human, it smelt like... dog... wet dog, huh? what was that all about? A murky human memory came swimming to the front of my mind; "Did you know that Quileutes are descended from wolves?" My mind and body froze.
My mind simply refused to come to the obvious conclusion so it stopped working, eventually though, it had to restart its self, but the conclusion was still there, biding its time, just waiting to assault me at the first chance it got; Jake was a werewolf.
Jake was there in the clearing when Laurent bit me, they had chased Laurent away and tried to fight him, they had even succeeded, but Jake had got injured in the fight.
It was strange how I hadn't even thought of Jake until this moment. I had spent the week craving him but now... it was only him I missed. It should have been a relief to only miss one person, crave only one person, but that craving had tripled since becoming a vampire.
It was ironic how many times I had wanted to become a vampire, and for more than one reason. Yet now it would probably have been better - easier at least if Laurent actually had killed me. I would have to live wit not only the fiery thirst, but the massive hole in my chest, forever.
Well I could at least do something about one of those. I jumped down from my hiding place but my jacket got caught on the branches and the worn material was shredded when I landed. I looked down in dismay then shrugged and took the jacket off, I wouldn't need it any more.
I ran about sixty miles north, it only took me twenty seconds. I decided this would be a good place to hunt, there should be no people about... OK, how was I going to do this?
I hesitantly sniffed the air, trying to smell out some animals I could eat. I kept my muscles ready to lock down if I smelt a human. Luckily I could only smell deer. The smell was animalistic, repellent, but better than the... werewolves, it was strange to think of them as werewolves, they all just seemed so... human.
I strained my ears to try and pinpoint where the deer was. I relied more on my hearing from then - it seemed a safer bet than smell - and found the herd within a minute.
I could see them through the leaves. I shifted my weight forward into a crouch soundlessly and stalked forward. The deer still hadn't noticed me and I could feel the pull of the hot, fresh blood, but wait, how was I going to do this? Should I just pounce? Should I just sink my teeth in? I shuddered at the memory of the venom in my bloodstream and decided I would snap its neck first, that ought to be relatively pain free right?
I was still unsure but the flames in the back of my throat decided for me, so I pushed my doubts to the back of my mind and jumped.
It was easier than I thought, the deer's neck snapped easily in my hands. I brought my teeth to the jugular and as I tasted the blood, my instincts took over and the corpse was drained before I knew it.
I pushed the corpse away and tried to think about what to do, obviously I couldn't go back to forks... I sighed, I was going to miss him, a lot. But I needed to find some other vegetarian vampires... I suppose I could try to find the Cullens... I set my jaw and tensed my muscles ready for the onslaught of pain, I was determined to search my memory to find a clue, anything that could help me figure out where they are. I started with my birthday all them months ago... I didn't get very far. I opened my eyes and stared at my cold, stone hands that were grinding up the trunk of a tree. I was reminded of Laurent, he was supposed to have been vegetarian... Eureka!
He was meant to be in Denali with Tanya's family... who were vegetarians!
I stood up and a ray of pink light hit my hand. I held my had up and twisted it this way and that, gazing as the light shattered into millions of eight coloured rainbows. I gasped. It really hit me then that I was a vampire, I was sparkly in the sun, I had super strength and super speed, super sight, hearing and smell, I was made of stone and I was Immortal. But I was also homeless.
I woke up from my reverie and turned to face north. I squared my shoulders and ran with the sunset on my left and the night on my right.