We piled back into the truck and all I heard about on the way home was how well it went, Emily was happy and relieved and Sam seemed almost jolly and thankful as we drove.
"How do you think Jake will take it?" I asked, now worry setting in as I looked over to Sam.
"Don't worry, he will hear it tonight when we scout, its all my mind is thinking about, and I will make sure he understands." He said simply.
I nodded quietly still worried.
The last thing I wanted was for Jake to be angry with me for stepping into the situation.
I couldn't just stand back and watch him suffer though; I just hope he understood that.
Sam dropped me off at my house and I rushed right in to tell Natty what had happened.
She listened quietly as she served me hot chocolate and I spilled everything that I had been thinking the worries, the fears, and even the hopes.
Once I had finally finished she looked thoughtfully at the walls, making me move a little restlessly as the minutes passed by.
Finally after what seemed like 5 minutes of pure agony, she looked at me and spoke.
"I don't think you need to be worried hunny, Jake is smart I think he will understand." She said simply.
The tense emotions that had held my back upright and my hands clenched finally released slightly as we sipped our hot chocolate thoughtfully.
Hopefully she was right, I thought as we sat in a comfortable silence listening to the old wood in the house creating a strange symphony as the wind blew against it outside.
We went to bed early and even though I wanted to sleep I found it impossible to quiet my mind.
Every "what if" was popping into my mind and finally giving up I pulled out my small boom box that I had and put in my favorite dance cd.
My back was finally healed; only five long spidery scars flexed across it and Natty had finally given me the ok to begin dancing again.
I pulled on my jazz shoes, making sure the music wasn't too loud to wake up Natty who thankfully slept pretty soundly.
The first song was simple orchestral music, most of the cd was. I didn't know who any of the songs were by, but I knew I liked them.
I stretched first and cleared my mind.
The window was behind me as I danced, and I watched my shadow flicker against the wall in front of me from the lamp behind me on the left side of the window.
I danced with fluid steps, pulling my leg in and up before stretching it out as en extension of myself.
I danced slowly and fluidly smiling slightly as I let myself get completely lost in the music.
My footsteps were light against the wood as I moved myself about imagining myself as a long leaf fluttering in the breeze.
The song ended seamlessly and was replaced by a simple waltz, by favorite and most basic and I moved about the room my arms stretched about an invisible partner who twirled me perfectly and helped me across the imaginary dance floor.
I glided across my small room, turning and pivoting, letting my head fall back as I imagined him dipping me so close to the ground.
I opened my eyes as I was bent backwards, my back probably looked like it was being split in two but I didn't care. Pulling myself back up I felt my breath caught as I turned toward the window my hand resting on an imaginary shoulder.
My window was open and leaning against its open frame was Jacob.
My breath caught in my thought as I took in his appearance. His cutoff jeans were the only articles of clothes on his body other than simple sneakers.
The lamp beside him cast jagged shadows across his stomach and chest pulling my eyes and locking them there. My fingers itched to run across the crevices and lines that carved his figure. His skin looked smooth and flawless, I felt my cheeks burning as the image of my mouth sliding across it slowly came to mind.
Forcing my eyes to his I took in his face.
He still looked sad and confused, his eyes looking at me intently. His full lips weren't down turned nor where they up in a smile. They seemed stuck in between, caught in a conflict of emotions juts like his eyes.
I waited for him to speak unsure of what to say, but nothing came. He simply looked at me, his eyes boring into mine.
"How long have you been standing there?" I finally managed to say, but sadly found it came out as more of a squeak.
My heart fluttered slightly as his mouth changed slightly turning up into a small half smile at the sound of my strange squeak no doubt.
"A while. You dance beautifully. What is that last dance called, it looked like you had your arm around someone who wasn't there?" He asked, his eyes blank and quiet as he looked at me.
"Thanks…it's called a waltz, it's done with two people usually." I said unsure of what to do. Should I sit or just keep standing here.
The next song came on and it was yet another simple waltz.
Jake pushed off lightly from the wood causing it to creak in response and walked over to me.
He stopped a foot from me and looked into my upturned face.
"I thought it looked familiar. May I have this dance?" He asked, surprising m completely as he held out his left hand for me.
I nodded still shocked and let my hand rest in his. He moved his other arm to wrap around my waist and I was completely taken back as he began to dance.
He was close now, so close as he guided me through the steps flawlessly.
My heart was pounding in my chest now my cheeks hot against the rest of my skin.
The steps were so different when he was the one leading them they were beautiful and incredible, and intense.
His arm about my waist made me want more of him, my mind was swimming I wanted him to pull me closer and hold me tighter.
I wanted to feel every inch of my skin against his. I wanted to melt into him as we danced the steps faster and smooth as he turned me about the room.
He pulled me closer as we slowed down and his strong leg moved forward pulling me into a low dip. It was slow, intoxicatingly slow.
My back dipped, and my neck extended, as I trusted him to hold me.
I moved lower than before my forehead an inch from the floor before he slowly pulled me up without any effort at all.
Pulling me up I found myself pressed against his bare chest his arms wrapped around me as I wrapped mine tentatively around him.
He must know, he must know what happened today, I thought listening to his heartbeat skip and jump within his chest.
It seemed just as excited as mine was, and each beat of mine seemed to be met just as excitedly by his.
"You know then, about today?" I asked, my breath brushing against his reddish brown skin.
He slowly released his arms and looked down at me.
His eyes seemed happier, but there was still some sadness that lingered beneath it.
"Yes, I do." He said quietly. My heart was beating furiously now; I couldn't read him at all. I wasn't sure if he was angry or thankful, nothing seemed to pass before his eyes.
"Are you angry?" I asked almost whispering as I looked down.
His warm hand rested under my chin his longer fingers lightly pressing my chin upward to look at him.
"I was at first…but then I listened to the whole conversation that Sam had seen happen. I'm not anymore, what you said was so incredibly on the mark I couldn't have said it better myself. I'm not happy that you interfered, or that Sam or Emily did but I'm starting to realize that I probably wouldn't have had the guts to do it." He said pulling my to the bed.
He sat down and I sat next to him, he looked across the room at the desk and a small smile formed on his lips.
I looked over and smiled as well when I noticed he was looking at the picture of us that he had given me.
"I like the frame." He said, looking over at me.
I smiled.
"You were right, it was my favorite. I love it." I said simply looking at him.
He looked down at his hands and back up at me. If I wasn't mistaken he looked nervous.
"Lilah, why did you go to tell Bella all of that?" He asked, looking at me curiously.
I looked at the wall ahead of us, wondering how I should answer. I wanted to tell him that I loved him, that I couldn't bare to see him hurt, but it was so soon after all of this had happened. It didn't seem like the right time.
Taking a deep breath I looked at him once more and pulled his large hands onto my lap, smiling as I did so.
I cupped my small's hands over them, gaining courage when I saw that he was smiling at my gesture.
"I couldn't bare to see you sad. Your smile, your happiness it's incredible. I didn't want to see you so sad." I said, choosing a middle road.
"That's what I guessed, but I wanted to make sure. It feels so weird, almost unbelievable to have such an incredible friend like you." He said moving his hands so that they held mine now.
I smiled, glad that he was happy, but something was just killing me and I needed to know the answer.
Taking another deep breath I said it quickly looking into his beautiful dark brown eyes.
"Jake am I your imprint?" I asked quickly.
He seemed shocked, and I immediately felt stupid for saying it.
I was probably completely wrong, I thought mentally smacking myself.
"How did you know?" He asked, and my eyes felt like they bugged out of my head.
I was RIGHT! I can't believe I was right!
"I..Um…I don't know I just kept feeling this pull to you and one thing led to another and I guessed and Emily agreed that I was probably right. I mean, but don't worry I can understand if you don't want anything or me. I mean I'm nothing compared to Bella, just a simple girl you know. I will always be your friend and…" I was suddenly cut off as my mouth was captured.
My eyes were wide as I looked and saw that Jake had indeed moved forward to kiss me. His lips were soft and full, pushing against mine with an eagerness I met as I quickly closed my eyes not wanting to freak him out if he looked at me when we were kissing.
His warm hand wrapped around me and pulled me closer to him, and I met his vigor as my arms wrapped around his neck, grabbing onto his short hair roughly and pulling him toward me. His lips sucked against my eagerly, his hunger ceaseless just like mine.
It was the most incredible kiss I had ever had, I felt passion and fire run through my veins.
My heart was furiously jumping in my chest threatening to break free as the kiss deepened.
He moaned slightly as I opened his mouth a bit reaching my tongue out to meet his, before he plunged in and took hold of me.
My mind wasn't even thinking as we sat there in the throws of the most intense kiss I had ever had, my body crazed him needed him. I couldn't live without him. He fit so perfectly against me as we sat there his arms holding my skin in his heated grasp and pulling me ever closer to him.
He was panting just as much as I when w finally broke the kiss, my body whining as we pulled apart. I blushed as I actually heard myself let out a soft whine as he pulled away. He looked at me and smiled at the noise, his breath coming in ragged inhales just as mine. He smiled mischievously, and I could feel my face a bright red from the heat that had literally coursed through me.
"Wow." I said blushing even more, knowing I probably sounded like an idiot.
"Wow is right." He said making me smile and laugh slightly.
I looked at him, unsure of what to do next. Was he ready for this, I mean juts yesterday he was in the bouts of depression over another girl.
I plucked up the courage and looked at him seriously.
"Are you sure you are ready for this. We can wait, until you know that you are completely over her. I'm not going anywhere you know." I said.
He looked at me, his eyes just as serious as mine before he smiled lightly.
"You are probably right, I'm sure I'm not ready, but I know that I love you. I man you're my imprint." He said, looking at the wall thoughtfully.
I put my arm around him, smiling as I looked at him.
"And I love you too, I agree, the last thing I want to be is sloppy seconds, you know?" I sad smiling lightly.
His hand wrapped over my small hand that hung halfway over his broad shoulders.
"I would never want you to feel like you are sloppy seconds. I don't want us to be serious until I know for sure that things like yesterday wont happen again. I want to be with you an only you, but unfortunately my mind hasn't completely gotten over Bella." He said his eyes saddening as he looked into mine.
I smiled, he understood completely. It would be hard to just be friends after a kiss like that, but it wouldn't last forever.
"I know, for now we can stay friends, and whenever we are ready to take it further we will. We just have to be open with each other." I said resting my cheek against his shoulder.
His wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him.
"That sounds perfect. Thank you, for what you said to Bella by the way. Friends?" He said, holding out his other hand to my free one.
I smiled against his shoulder and nodded.
"No problem what are friends for right?" I said holding his hand and shaking it.
He chuckled and hugged me once more.
We said goodbye and the next moment he was gone, his frame disappearing from the window to the dark ground below.
I felt my lips, still burning and warm from the kiss he had given me. Part of me was sad that he wasn't ready but the rest of me pulled on the patience I was so well known for.
I pulled at it, like a thread wrapping it slowly around my mind as I sat there on my bed.
I would be patient, and make sure I am always there for him. And someday, hopefully soon we can be together as more than friends and share more of those cheek-burning kisses.
Turning off the lamp I lay down and let my mind wander as sleep slowly took me.
The dreams were still as quiet but now they were filled with his lips tenderly kissing my skin as the moments passed in the woods. I smiled in my dreams, happy that at least here I could still enjoy his kisses.