Author's Notes: I know, I know. I've been gone for forever and I royally suck for not replying to reviews or PMs or anything. RL was a beezy to deal with for the longest time, so I took a break because it was getting to be too much to handle. Long story short, I was gone for a while, but I'm back now! Forreal this time! YAY. Thank you to everyone for the 250+ reviews on the last chapter, even though I know I probably didn't deserve it. Can you believe ALLTB is almost at the 2K mark? HOLY EFF! Thank you for all the support. Hugs and kisses to each of you! Oh btw, long chapter ahead of you. Grab some snackies and a beverage of your choice, yes?

To my favorite boys Jamie and Anthony: I know you'll never find this even though you've been looking, so HAH. But I love you both for all that you do. Thank you for being the shoulders I've been needing since summer started. I wonder if you two will ever understand how much you mean to me.

To Twinkie: You're the best beta/person/friend I know. Thank you so much for your constant support of ALLTB and all my writing in general. For being there when I needed a friend to talk to, for getting me to write again, and for answering my calls. LOL. Happy belated birthday, even though I'm weeks late (on here). Your speed with my chapters always amazes me and I'm more than glad that you reviewed that long ass review on Hello, Stranger that was the start of us! I love you, Twinkie. MWAH.

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer created Twilight and its characters, I provide them with an alternate universe to play in. I also do not own any songs by Bon Jovi or the Spice Girls. Teehee.

A Little Less Than Before

Chapter Thirteen

Keep Driving

"We'll take the long roads off into the world where no one knows. We'll pick the right songs, cause I believe these roads were made for us. Keep driving till there's no where left to run, can't help but think there's something there for us."

Edward Cullen

Friends.

Just friends.

My brow furrowed once Bella's words replayed in my head for the millionth time. Really? That's all we were?

Nothing more.

I shook my head and slammed my hand down on the speed control of the treadmill I was using. My legs were already burning with exertion, but I wanted nothing more than to focus on anything but Bella Swan and her godforsaken words I still couldn't get over.

Bella Bella Bella.

A bead of sweat trickled down the side of my face as I turned the volume up on my iPod as loud as it would go. I exhaled heavily, ignoring the distracting ache in my calves as I fought to keep up with the pace of the machine.

It shouldn't have affected me too badly. I was in a new city living in a new apartment with a new job and new women who knew absolutely nothing of my past life. What could have been better? My slate was wiped clean, and there I was, at the gym to distract myself from thinking about the one girl in all of Seattle I couldn't have.

Fucking ridiculous.

And to think I'd just met up with my ex-fiancée for the first time in years, and still all I was thinking about was Bella. I didn't understand it.

With a grunt of frustration, I shoved my palm onto the stop button and breathed deeply once the treadmill came to a complete halt. The abrupt stop made me a bit dizzy, but I honestly didn't care. I grabbed my small towel hanging off the side and decided I was done for the day. No matter where I was, Bella plagued my thoughts, so there was no use in me burning my legs out to try and not think about her when it was clearly all I was doing.

I wiped my face as I walked towards the water fountain, my brow raising when I saw a slender blonde bent over and sipping away. Her position gave me a fantastic view of her velour-clad ass, and her shirt riding up slightly exposed a colorful tattoo of a humming bird on her lower back. And just because I was so damned eager to prove to myself that I didn't need hot and cold Bella Swan, I decided Five-minute Edward needed to work his magic.

With my trademarked crooked grin in place, I leaned on the wall beside her and waited until she noticed she had company. After a few more sips, the blonde stood upright and licked her wet lips, eyeing me without shame.

I knew I probably looked like sex on legs. My hair was all over the place, my body glistening from the run, and to top it all off, I was looking at her like she was a gift sent from up above.

If there was any one thing I could do to get a girl to spend the night with me, it'd be that look I gave them right before I asked. I don't know what it was. Maybe green eyes were a number one turn on for girls because I know for damn sure it wasn't the bushy caterpillars I called eyebrows that attracted them to me.

"Hi," she smiled. "Did you need the fountain?"

"No, I actually just came here to try and talk to a pretty girl." I smiled right back. "I'm Edward."

"Natasha." She took her lower lip into her mouth while crossing her arms, making her chest jut out even more than it already had been before. Nice rack, I thought. Even though they were probably just silicone.

"So, do you work out here often? I've never seen you."

I tried to work my charm, but the words just weren't coming out. All I could think about was how the color of her hair was all wrong, how I didn't like the tramp stamp on her back, how her eyes were too blue, and how her voice was not nearly how I'd hoped it would sound. Eventually, I just sighed and walked away without another word, leaving Natasha dumbfounded and calling after me as I flipped on my ignore switch.

I was a hopeless moron.

For the next couple of days, I kept my distance from Bella. I called in at work and asked them for a few more days to settle in, and they granted me that without a second thought, probably because Emmett had really put in a very good word for me. Here and there, I'd receive texts from Bella, and more than anything I wanted to drive to her place and just hold her in my arms, but I couldn't. I refused to submit to her confusing mind.

So, I replied to her texts. I answered her calls, but kept the conversation brief. I didn't want her to think I'd been ignoring her, even though that's basically what I was doing.

She didn't have to know I was butt hurt by the fact that she had claimed we were just friends, although I'm sure it was a complete lie.

I was doing pretty well until I took a stroll downtown one day and saw each and every store decorated with all things pink, red, and white. Hearts were pasted everywhere, teddy bears singing the words "I love you" were all available for purchase, and almost every florist had a sale on bouquets of roses. It only then occurred to me that Valentine's Day was tomorrow. For the first time in years, I'd be alone. I didn't have work to throw myself into, nor did I have a whole phonebook of numbers belonging to women I could call to keep me company.

Did you know? Alice and Jasper are going to San Francisco on Valentine's, Bella's words echoed in my head. I eyed the stuffed animals and the flowers and the gifts, trying to decide between whether I wanted her to be alone or not.

It shouldn't have even been a question.

Of course I didn't want her to be alone.

Just because I was pissed at her for being so back and forth, it didn't mean we couldn't spend a day together as... friends, I suppose.

The word was like acid on my tongue, and I almost wanted to spit just by saying it in my head.

I purchased a bouquet of wildflowers and because the arrangement exceeded forty dollars, I received a medium-sized, beige bear holding a heart for free. Along the way home, I made a pit stop at Cupcake Royale and thanked the cashier for wrapping the cupcake in the trademarked pink box.

Before I went to bed, I carefully thought out how I wanted the day to go and sighed in satisfaction when everything seemed to work out according to plan. If Bella agreed to go out, I'm more than sure I'd be able to make her forget all about Alice and Jasper and their mini getaway to California.

My alarm clock woke me up bright and early. I didn't get much sleep because I was actually pretty excited for what today could possibly bring. I showered quickly, brushed my teeth, and dressed casual, yet stylish. Before I walked out, I grabbed my keys and all of the gifts I'd gotten and drove to her place. I debated between calling her or not, and opted to just surprise her at the door.

I left the bear and cupcake in the back seat and walked up the flight of stairs with a grin on my face. Even though I was the one who was keeping my distance, I fucking missed her and couldn't wait to hug her even if it had no meaning behind it. She was slowly becoming a very close friend, and close friends are allowed to miss one another, right?

She came to the door with a messy bun and pajamas, and she still blew me away. It was the corniest thing to ever cross my mind of someone of the opposite sex, but I really couldn't help it.

Bella chastised me for "ignoring" her, and I quickly defended myself by pointing out the fact that I did reply to all of her texts, and I did answer her calls, and I was just busy with unpacking and whatnot, which was partially true.

She huffed and crossed her arms, knowing I'd won the argument. Then she asked, "Edward, do you know what today is?"

I quirked a brow. "Of course I know what today is."

"Does it seem like lonely old me would have anything to do while my best friends are on a plane to California?"

I smiled and chuckled softly. "I was hoping you'd say that because," I pulled out the bouquet of wildflowers from behind my back. "I'm taking you out. Happy Valentine's Day, Bella."

She stared at me in shock, her big brown eyes darting back and forth between me and the arrangement of flowers I'd handed to her. "Do... Do I get any kind of say in this? At all?"

"Hmm," I pondered. "No, not really. Go get dressed."

Her lower lip jutted out, and I wanted nothing more than to kiss it back into place. "Edward, can you at least-"

"Isabella, shut up, and go get ready. Bring a jacket because it might be a bit cold where we're going and a blanket or two for later."

Bella blinked a few times before giving up, stomping to her room and slamming the door to emphasize her anger. I only chuckled to myself and looked for a vase to put the flowers into. My eyes came in contact with the arrangement Jasper had gotten for her not too long ago. I sneered and laughed because mine was better.

Mine came with a free bear.

"Okay, so," I hummed in thought, "what's your favorite kind of music?"

Bella kept her arms crossed and her focus on the road straight ahead. After she got dressed, I practically had to drag her out the front door and tackle her into the passenger seat because she was that hesitant to go where I'd been planning to take her. I didn't know if it was because she thought this was a date or if it was because she merely wanted to sulk about Alice and Jasper, but either way, I wasn't having it.

"I'll tell you if you tell me where we're going, Edward."

I groaned in exasperation. She had been reluctant to tell me anything until I revealed where I was taking her. I wish she could have just been a normal girl, all bouncy and excited because girls like surprises, right? "Can't you just trust me? Are you always so stubborn?"

"Yes, are you always so secretive?"

I chose not to answer that comment and gave up trying to get more info on her. She would love where we were going, I was almost sure of it. I chanced a glance over at her and she still seemed to be fuming. Briefly, I considered giving her the cupcake because I knew it'd calm her down, but decided against it. Instead, I pressed the "next" button on my iPod and smiled when it was a familiar tune Emmett and I used to sing all the time. We'd slide across the floor in our socks and underwear, putting this song as high as it would go when Carlisle and Esme weren't home. It annoyed the living daylights out of Alice, I'm sure.

I hummed along with the tune and eyed Bella. She was still ignoring me. If she and I were going to have a good time, she couldn't ignore me.

"She says we've got to hold onto what we've got," I sang, drumming my fingers along the steering wheel. "It doesn't make a difference if we make it or not."

Bella stared at me questioningly as I nudged her, knowing damn well she had to have known the lyrics to this song. It was a classic. How could you not know the lyrics to this song? "We've got each other and that's - come on sing with me, Bella."

She stayed quiet.

"A lot for love, we'll give it a shot," I took a deep breath. "Whoaaaa! We're halfway there, whoa! Living on a prayer - come on, Bella!"

I laughed out loud and continued to sing along with the next verse, hoping to get her into it. She was chewing down on her bottom lip, to keep from laughing or just because she was irritated, I wasn't sure. I turned the volume up higher as the chorus started coming up again. "Let loose, Bella. You know you want to. Gina dreams of running away. When she cries in the night, Tommy whispers, 'baby it's okay.' Someday..."

"We've got to hold on to what we've got," Bella finally gave in and sang along, making my smile even wider than it already was. "It doesn't make a difference if we make it or not."

"We got each other,"

"And that's a lot for love. We'll give it a shot!"

We sang along with the chorus, lengthening our "whoa's" and screaming at the tops of our lungs right along with Bon Jovi. The instrumental came on as both of us simultaneously acted like we were playing air guitars. I was thankful we were on the freeway because if not, I'd probably get into a car crash. She whipped her hair around as the words came back on while I rolled down the windows a bit so her hair could blow freely, and she could feel like a rock star.

When the ending of the song neared, Bella and I actually turned to each other, throwing our hearts into the lyrics as we sang off-key and danced along with the beat of the music with the wind in our hair.

We laughed hysterically once the music faded into another melody. Bella reached over to the center console where my iPod was and shuffled through all the music.

"Play something else," I suggested, nudging her with my elbow.

"I'm looking!" she replied, using the scroll wheel to look through the entire list. "Oh my god!"

"What?"

"Seriously, Edward?" Bella laughed loudly, covering her mouth before raising the volume. Once it started, I sunk down in embarrassment and tried to avoid Bella's finger poking into my ribs. "I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want. So tell me what you want, what you really really want. I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I really really really wanna zig-a-zig ah!"

"Shut up," I groaned, trying to grab my iPod back from her. "It wasn't me! Alice put it in there!"

"If you wanna be my lover, you've gotta get with my friends. Make it last forever, friendship never ends!" She slapped her knees, and I couldn't help but chuckle along with her. As much as I hated to admit, the song was pretty damn catchy even if the lyrics were absolutely absurd.

"If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give," we sang, "taking is too easy, but that's the way it is!"

Then, Bella began doing some kind of an obnoxious dance that a thirteen-year old would do in front of a mirror, and I couldn't help but laugh as she lip-synced to the Spice Girls.

"Slam your body down, and wind it all around!" She slammed the roof of my car with her palm. "Slam your body down, and wind it all around!"

I guffawed at how well she knew the lyrics to the song and begged her to stop because if she didn't, I think I'd pass out from how hard I was laughing.

She slapped my arm playfully and changed the song at my request. After I'd calmed down from her "Wannabe" episode, I nudged her with my arm. "To thank you for reminding me to thoroughly give Alice a piece of my mind, there's something for you in the backseat."

With a laugh, Bella arched a brow and looked behind her, letting out a small gasp as she reached over and grabbed the bear and boxed cupcake. "It's adorable!" She cuddled the bear close to her chest and sighed. "I think I'm going to name him... Teddie."

"Teddie?" I chuckled.

"Yes, Teddie. T-E-D-D-I-E. Like that nickname you hate with a T in front of it."

I stared at her in shock and wondered how it was exactly that she was aware of that bit of information. Having read the expression on my face, Bella giggled and opened up the Cupcake Royale box. "You forget your sister has been my best friend for years." From my peripherals, I could see a smile light up her face as she pulled out the tiny dessert.

Since it was Valentine's week, they had changed up their cupcakes just a bit. I bought Bella a chocolate cupcake, iced with buttercream frosting and covered with pink, red, and white sprinkles with a flower made of frosting. She pulled off the small "Be My Valentine" decoration and waved it in front of me. "Is this your way of subtly asking me to be your valentine, Edward?"

"Depends," I laughed. "Are you going to say yes?"

She popped the bottom of it into her mouth and licked off the frosting. "I'll get back to you on that."

"You do that. I'll be waiting on your answer."

After a comfortable drive filled with easy going conversation and regular music, we finally made it to our destination. We'd have to walk a bit, but I didn't mind that because the weather wasn't too bad. It was partly cloudy with a slightly chilled breeze. Bella slipped her jacket on as I went to the trunk and grabbed the basket I'd packed before I picked her up. She eyed me curiously, following as I led the way.

"What's inside?" she asked.

"You'll see."

"Again with the secrets?"

"Again with the stubbornness?"

Bella huffed slightly, but didn't press on the subject any further. When we finally made it, she grinned in anticipation and pulled off her shoes and socks. "A picnic on the beach, I'm guessing?"

"You caught me," I chuckled, reaching into the basket to pull out the blanket I'd packed. Ruby Beach had been a place Carlisle and Esme used to visit when all of us were away at college. I never had the time to see it before I moved out to Chicago, but I was hoping with how much they gushed over it, it'd be worth the many years of waiting.

Bella came down and sat next to me, thanking me quietly when I handed her the pasta salad and a panini. "You know," she started, "this is about thirty miles south of a town called Forks. Ever heard of it?"

I took a bite of my sandwich and shook my head.

"I grew up there, but I've never been here. You figure Charlie would tell me about a beach this extravagant! But no, we always had to settle for First Beach in La Push."

"Charlie?"

"Yeah," Bella said. "My dad. Chief of Police in Forks."

While we ate, we talked about her life in Forks and how she grew up and whatnot. I found out her parents had divorced, and that her mom and stepfather lived in Phoenix, Arizona. She had to do a lot of traveling back and forth for the holidays, and this year it was time to visit her father. I don't know how she was able to do it because if my mother and father had divorced and moved so far away from one another, I'm pretty sure I'd go insane.

She didn't have to ask me too much about my life simply because Alice had already taken care of that. Alice, Emmett, and I were all very close, and I suppose I should've already known that Alice would tell Bella everything about me. I left out the tidbit about the five-minute women in Chicago because I figured it wasn't too good of a topic to use as an icebreaker. She mostly asked about why I chose Chicago, why I decided to move back, and why I had chosen to stay.

Easy questions, simple answers.

I'd feed her the details another time.

It was like tip toeing around eggshells as I retold my stories of Chicago to Bella. I didn't tell her I was a heartbroken fucker who just wanted to get as far away as I could from the woman I gave everything to. I didn't tell her I came back because I was finally ready to move on for good.

She didn't have to know of how much I'd put myself out there.

After we finished our food, we left our shoes and the picnic basket atop the blanket to go dip our feet into the water, which I'm sure was freezing cold.

I stuck my foot in and cringed at how right I was. It seriously felt like liquid hypothermia. I couldn't believe there were actually people in wetsuits swimming. Bella stayed a safe distance away, refusing to come any closer because she was so sure she'd trip and fall face first into the ocean.

"If I can handle this, you can, too! Stop being such a girl and come over here!" I shouted from where I was. When she shook her head and planted her feet into the sand, I only chuckled and pitied her lack of enthusiasm. I sauntered over to her and despite her frantic yells, scooped her up into my arms and threw her over my shoulder.

"Don't throw me in, please don't throw me in!" she begged. "Edward Cullen, I swear if you throw me into the water, I'm going to castrate you in your sleep!"

"Why is it that every time a man pisses off a woman, his mini-me is always the first to be in danger?"

"Because your mini-me is usually the most treasured part of your body. Now, put me down!"

Her little fists were beating into my back, her legs were kicking at a rapid pace, and it was really beginning to get quite irritating. "Quit it, Swan," I said, using my free hand to swat her ass as I stood my ground. "Now, before you give me some kind of make-you-feel-bad speech about how we agreed to be just friends, we are. I slapped your ass. No big deal. Friends do that. What friends don't do is," I used my free hand once again and palmed the same area I had just swatted and laughed when she elbowed the back of my head.

"Now that you've successfully groped and smacked my rump, would you mind letting me down?" she huffed. I hated how fucking cute she could be sometimes. I didn't even see her face and already my plan of scaring her by walking into the water had been an utter failure. Reluctantly, I set her down on the dry sand and flicked her forehead.

"Party pooper," I sighed.

"Ass smacker."

I eyed her humorously and when she shook her head and slapped my hip gently, I knew I was forgiven. We spent the remainder of our time on the beach writing names and drawing shapes into the dampened sand with twigs.

The sun began to set as Bella and I fought over who drew a better Hello Kitty. It wasn't my fault I had no idea how to draw the damned mouthless cat. Bella had Hello Kitty printed onto various pairs of her underwear (at least that's what Alice had said), so I knew she was going to draw it, or her - or whatever gender that kitty is - flawlessly.

We both stopped our bickering as soon as the sun disappeared behind the huge rock on the water. I now understood why Carlisle and Esme came here so often. The view was absolutely breathtaking. The sky seemed to explode into splashes of a heavy violet and a sun-kissed orange, illuminating the surface of the water like it had been set on fire. There were nice sunsets in Chicago, but from what I remembered, nothing even remotely close to the sunsets in Washington.

Bella had a soft smile on her face when I peeked over at her. She seemed to appreciate the sunset just as much as I did and because she grew up only a few miles from here, I'm sure it brought back memories. Perhaps her and her father had watched a few together. We admired the sky above us in silence, only speaking when we were the only ones left on the beach.

The sky had darkened completely, the wind had become too cold, and our jackets were not enough of a source of warmth anymore, so we decided to leave. I packed up everything and led her back to the Volvo, letting her know our day wasn't over just yet.

She didn't ask where we were going as I drove back to Seattle. Bella seemed utterly fascinated by the beige bear she had named Teddie. I couldn't help but grin at how adorable it was to see her that way.

The drive back was shorter than the drive there, and we made it to our second destination with no troubles at all.

"I've always wanted to ride the swings at night," Bella laughed as she realized where we were. "But it was hard to since, you know, playgrounds are actually off-limits after a certain time, and my dad's a cop."

I laughed and gestured to the large swing set a few feet away from us. "Well, your father isn't here now, so how about you risk it this one time?"

Bella Swan

I felt like such a kid again as I skipped over to the swings. It seemed like forever and a day since I'd been to a playground and as I sat down on the squeaky rubber, memories of my childhood flooded my head.

Memories of when everything was okay between Renee and Charlie. Memories of when I woke up to two parents at the breakfast table instead of one. Memories of when they'd take me to playgrounds like this one and push me until I felt like I could touch the clouds.

I was too lost in my trip down memory lane that I didn't even notice Edward behind me, gently shoving me forward so my body could get some momentum to move. I pulled my legs back and jutted them forward like I used to do when I was a kid, loving the feeling of the wind against my face.

I felt carefree for the first time in a while.

He moved away and stood against the pole when I was swinging high enough, watching as I giggled and enjoyed myself underneath the moonlit sky.

"How do you feel?" he asked.

"Like," I paused, looking for the word, "like I'm learning to fly."

Edward chuckled and continued to watch as I swung back and forth. I briefly wondered why he didn't just hop on the swing right next to me, but decided I was having too much fun to question it. Once my head was dizzy from the constant back and forth motions, I stuck my feet into the tanbark beneath us and slowed myself down. "Edward?"

He looked at me. "Yeah?"

I looked back at him and tried to rip away the exterior to get to the man beneath. Something seemed to be missing in his story about Chicago. After seeing how much he loved his family, his explanation of suddenly having an abrupt decision to move "just because he felt like it" didn't seem to suffice. "Tell me."

"Tell you what?"

"The real reason why you moved to Chicago. And the real reason why you moved back."

His eyes softened at my request as he ran a hand through his hair and sighed softly. Edward was guarded when it came to Chicago, and I knew there had to have been a reason as to why he closed himself off from talking about it too much. There were secrets beneath that hard exterior, pain underneath his steadily beating heart. One doesn't etch a permanent initial onto themselves without having some kind of reason behind it, and I really wanted to know what it was.

He knew my secret.

It was my turn to ask about his.

"How about I give you... the simplified version?" He pushed himself off the pole he was leaning on and stood in front of my swing, refusing to meet my eyes as he kicked a bottle cap underneath his foot. "I was originally supposed to go to Seattle University. I wanted to stay close to home so I could see my family whenever I felt like it. I wanted to be there for Alice's graduation, for my parent's birthdays, and the holidays and all that good stuff."

I looked up at him, waiting for him to continue.

He held out his wrist and showed me the black "T", allowing me to gently run my thumb over it as he spoke, "This stands for Tanya, as I'm sure you remember. She was... my girlfriend of five years when I got this marked on myself. I was ready to commit myself to her and wanted to show her that in another way other than asking her to marry me since I'd already done that."

"You two were engaged?" I asked in surprise.

His eyes shut as he nodded slowly. "It ended as soon as it happened. I was ready to show her on our anniversary. But, she was too busy cheating on me with my best friend to even remember it was our special day."

My eyes widened as I slapped my hand over my mouth in shock. "Edward, I-"

"No, no, don't say sorry," he interrupted. "It's okay. Really. I was just, too much of a coward to face her after that, so I took the easy way out and fled to the farthest college I'd gotten accepted to. My parents asked me over and over if it was what I really wanted, and I told them it was. Next thing you know, I'm leaving everyone I love behind because I was too much of a moron to have not seen it sooner."

He chuckled darkly. "I decided after that, that the T would stand for temptation. That I would never again be tempted to throw myself out there the way I did before. Love is a dangerous game, Bella. A dangerous game that can rip you apart, or send you soaring depending on which path you're led down. I think both you and I know that better than anyone."

I nodded slowly, watching as he took a step closer to me. The hurt was vivid in his expression now, the haunting memories of what used to be plaguing through his thoughts, and I felt horrible for bringing it up. Before I could get the words out to apologize, he spoke again.

"See, for years and years I kept myself away from feeling anything involving my heart. I closed myself off and refused to let anyone in, in fear of history repeating itself." He stroked my cheek tenderly, running his thumb over my lower lip as my heart thundered in my chest. "And yet, here I am with you, telling you the story of my life that hardly anybody knows. Feeling things I haven't felt in so long, feeling things I haven't allowed myself to feel in so long... I just, don't get it."

Edward placed his hands on the chains of the swing, making my breath hitch with the intensity blazing within his emerald eyes. "How is it that you do this to me, Bella?" he whispered, leaning down closer to my face while I instinctively pulled away, chewing down on my lower lip because we had agreed we were going to be friends and nothing more.

"I can't," I sighed, shaking my head. "I can't do this."

He hooked his finger underneath my chin and pulled my face up gently. "Do you honestly believe that this," he gestured between himself and me, "is being just friends?"

I swallowed hard. "Yes."

He stayed still for a second and then closed the small distance between us, molding his inviting lips with my own. It only seemed to last for a second before he pulled away. "Lie to me then, and tell me you didn't feel anything."

My mouth opened because I was ready to tell him I felt nothing, but he was right.

It'd be a lie.

There was something, and even if it was the tiniest, smallest thing, it was still there.

I was ready to lie. I was good at it. I had everyone believing the biggest lie of all - that I wasn't in love with Jasper. If I could do that, I could surely do this.

"I'm not lying when I say there's nothing there, Edward."

"I don't believe you," he replied almost immediately. His fingers tightened around the chains as he pulled me closer, leaving me no room to run or escape. "There is something. There has to be. I just know it."

"Edward-"

"Don't you feel your heartbeat when we're around each other? It matches my own." He took my hand and placed it on his chest, holding it there as he pierced through me with his sultry eyes. "I think it's about time you and I both stop lying to ourselves and to each other and just admit that there's something there. Maybe you can lie to Jasper, perhaps you can lie to Alice. But stop lying to me. Don't you dare continue to tell me I am just your friend because I know I'm not."

I couldn't utter out a single word as he leaned in and placed an open-mouthed kiss against my throat. "Your feelings for me are there, Bella," he whispered, "you're just ignoring them."

I felt my knees go unsteady and my breathing hitch as those words left his mouth. I wanted to deny him, tell him he was wrong, and that I had no feelings for him to ignore, but I couldn't get it out there. With his body so very close to mine and his words still lingering in the air around us, I just couldn't find it in me to push him away.

"I don't care if you still love Jasper," Edward murmured. "I don't care if it takes you days or weeks or months to let go, because I'm tired of pretending. I'm tired of acting like you don't affect me when you do. Tired of trying to distance myself when I know I just can't stay away. I can't do it anymore, Bella. I won't." He caressed my face gently, pulling at my heartstrings with the depth and intensity beneath his gorgeous, green eyes. "I don't care if I'm not the first guy in your life. Or the second, or even the third, or fourth, or whatever. I don't care if I have to compete with Jasper. But, what I want you to know... is that you and me, we're not just friends. We were never just friends, Bella."

"Edward..."

Again, he cut me off. "Listen to me. If even after all this, you still believe I am nothing but your friend, then fine. I will back off. I'll be everything a friend should be - supportive and understanding. I will push it all away if it would make you happy," he paused. "But if you do feel something, if there is just the slightest hint of anything more... then ask me to kiss you."

I swallowed down the huge lump in my throat and tried to look away, but I just couldn't. My mouth opened to protest, or to agree, I wasn't even sure anymore. My heart and mind were fighting for dominance, torn between what I knew I wanted and what I was sure I needed.

The lines were severely blurred now, and I didn't know who belonged in what category anymore.

Yes, I was in love with Jasper. But at the same time, I couldn't deny the attraction and feelings I had for Edward anymore.

I was a selfish girl who wanted a man who'd love me even though I couldn't fully love him back. It was my reasoning behind the walls I built to keep Edward out. I didn't want to fall for him if he wasn't going to be ahead of Jasper.

But despite my crazy and incredibly unrequited feelings for my best friend, Edward wanted me. Regardless of all my flaws and insecurities and cracks and brokenness, Edward wanted me.

He knew everything... and he still wanted me.

I closed my eyes and felt his lips just a short distance away. "Edward."

His grip tightened on the chains, and he leaned in closer. So close that if I had moved just a centimeter or less, our lips would lock.

"Please," I pleaded.

"Please what, Bella?" he asked lowly. "Say it out loud."

He knew everything.

"Please, kiss me."

And he still wanted me.

Without having to be asked twice, he closed that small centimeter of a gap between us, and I almost screamed from the realization that Edward was absolutely right. There was no use in denying it even though I kept using Jasper as an excuse.

I didn't love Edward, but what I felt for him was real. It was right in front of my very eyes now because I had finally pulled myself out of denial.

Your feelings for me are there, Bella, you're just ignoring them.

He couldn't have been more right.

And even though I loved Jasper, and even though Edward's heart was broken for years, I couldn't stop my eyes from fluttering closed as I sighed into his mouth and basked in his warmth. We were a fucked up, troubled pair seeking for comfort, both dying to let go of the past. He understood me just as I understood him.

Two wrongs coming together shouldn't have felt so right, but it just... did. It felt more right than anything else in that moment, and I lost myself in the feeling of being so carefree of everything else except what was right in front of me. Edward.

He wrapped his arms around my waist, leaning into my body more as I placed my feet on the ground and held onto the chains beside me.

The kiss, quite literally, took my breath away. Never had I been kissed so passionately and so gently at the same time. I took my hands off the chains of the swing and wrapped them around his neck to pull him against me because it felt like I really couldn't get close enough.

"Oh, Bella," he whispered against my mouth, softly nipping at my bottom lip before touching his tongue to mine.

I moaned quietly and twisted my fingers into the hair at the nape of his neck, dizzy at the intensity of how good it felt to kiss him this way. He gave my lip another gentle bite before he pulled away and leaned his forehead against mine. "You are the sweetest torture, Isabella."

My fingers remained in his hair, our lips close enough to touch, and our bodies welded together like it was an art. "What does this mean?"

Edward leaned in to kiss me again and released the chains on the swing, wrapping his arms around me and hoisting my body off the seat. I wrapped my legs around his waist and held onto his neck, burying my face into his shoulder as he walked us to his car.

"We don't have to talk details now. We'll figure it out, Bella. Don't worry," Edward murmured into my ear. "For now, I'm happy with this. I don't care about labels or anything else. Just you."

I smiled against his skin and kissed the blade of his clothed shoulder. "I don't care either."

Once we made it back to his car, he somehow managed to unlock and open the doors and still hold me up. I pulled away from his shoulder and looked into his smoldering eyes, pushing back the strands of hair that had fallen astray.

"Go out on a date with me," he whispered. "A real date. None of that non-date stuff anymore."

I froze as his words from not too long ago echoed inside my head. It was the night on the steps when he'd mentioned another non-date once again. "But, I'm not ready to let go of him just yet, Edward."

"I told you I didn't care about how long it took you."

I bit my lower lip and stroked the side of his face. "I'll get back to you on that."

"You do that," he sighed with a small smile. "I'll be waiting on your answer."

Edward kissed my lips once more before putting me into the car. He walked around to the other side and started up the engine, and just like that, we were off.

The light melody of the song on his iPod echoed throughout the car as I stared at the darkened scenery flying past us. Never before had I ever had such an eventful Valentine's Day. My thoughts drifted to my two best friends and how they were doing in San Francisco, and for the first time in a long time, thinking of them together didn't hurt as much as it used to.

I was lost in my own state of mind, only being brought back to reality when suddenly I felt Edward's hand graze tentatively across my knee. He looked over at me quickly, flashing the infamous crooked grin that could put every single worry I had at ease. Things will be okay, he was telling me.

I smiled and put my own above his, twining our fingers together before letting our joined hands rest in my lap.

A comfortable silence filled the car as we made our way back home. I must have drifted off to sleep because one second I was looking out the window and the next, Edward was shaking me gently, already parked against the curb in front of my apartment building.

He got out and walked around to my side of the car, opening the door with Teddie tucked underneath his arm. I was groggy from sleep and tired from the long day, so he helped me get up the stairs and paused when we reached by door.

Before I could utter out a single word, Edward pulled me close and wrapped his arms around my shoulders, burying his nose into my hair as he sighed softly.

"Thank you, Bella," he murmured, "for letting me take you out today."

"I should be thanking you. If you hadn't had come over, I would have been here, mulling over the idea of Alice and Jasper alone miles away. I had an amazing time today, I really did. Thank you so much."

He pulled away just enough to tuck my hair behind my ear. "You're more than welcome, Bella." With a kiss to my forehead and one more goodbye, he turned and made his way back to the stairwell.

I bit my lip and sighed shakily, calling out, "Edward, wait." Slowly, I walked over to him and placed my hands on his shoulders, noticing he was a step lower than me so our heights were a little more evened out.

"Yes, I'll go out on a date with you." I focused on his stunned, emerald green eyes while running my fingers through his soft, tousled hair as I leaned in and captured his lips with mine. He took in a breath through his nose and snaked his arms around my waist, holding me closer to his body as I smiled to myself.

"And yes," I breathed after pulling away, resting my forehead against his, "you are my valentine, Edward Cullen."

He laughed and kissed my neck ever so gently. "A bit late for that, but I'll take it."

"Better late than never?"

Edward gave me a crooked grin and nodded. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"And I'll answer." He gave me one last peck before heading down the stairs as I walked back to my apartment, happier than I had been in a while.

So maybe I wasn't over Jasper, and maybe Edward and I weren't officially an item, but I knew and he knew that somehow, someway, things would be okay.

We'll figure it out, Bella. Don't worry.

I washed off my light makeup and went to bed, snuggled against Teddie with thoughts of a very memorable Valentine's day flashing through my head. It was the most peaceful sleep I'd had in weeks, and I imagined it was probably because it was the first night I dreamt of Edward Cullen.

End of Chapter Thirteen

Author's Notes: See? Yay! Baby steps, right? Told you this chapter was an important one. I kid you not when it comes to matters of importance. Hopefully you'll all forgive me for the two-month disappearing act I pulled. Pictures are up on my profile under ALLTB goodies. Go take a looksee if you enjoy visuals!

Lots of you answered the last question with either your mothers, your hubbys (unless said hubby is the reason for you being upset), or your best girlfriends. I run to one (or all) of four people: Jen - the closest person I have to a best friend, Erica - my Twinkie for life, Jamie - the male version of me, or Anthony - my male counterpart's best friend. So I can either run to girls or boys. Depends on the situation, really. Thanks for answering, everyone! It's nice to hear more about all of you! :)

Next question: What is the best gift you've ever received?

Love,
BB